FF12 Sightseeing Tour Part 8: The Protagonist Conversation

By Shamus Posted Friday Mar 4, 2022

Filed under: Retrospectives 89 comments

This week Rocketeer talks about Vaan’s scene with the princess. Which means it’s time for us to have “the protagonist conversation” about Final Fantasy XII. To be honest, I hate this conversation. It’s an unproductive time-sink, and there are always a handful of people willing to argue about it until the internet runs out of storage space.

The argument begins when someone complains about the apparent protagonist of a game with an ensemble cast. Maybe they’re boring, unlikable, inert, or they have no personal stakes in the plot. So the critic will say so:

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “FF12 Sightseeing Tour Part 8: The Protagonist Conversation”

 


 

A Travelog of Ivalice, Part 8: It Would Be So Nice

By The Rocketeer Posted Wednesday Mar 2, 2022

Filed under: FFXII 78 comments

The sun-scorched Giza Plain has entered its rainy season, transforming it for a time into a swampy network of rushing wadis. Just beyond it lies the Ozmone Plain, a rather pretty area dotted here and there by derelict airships from a battle long, long ago. Both areas can be jogged through easily and nothing of import occurs therein; Jahara, settlement of the garif, lies upon the western edge of Ozmone.

It looks nice, but the HOA fees are outrageous.
It looks nice, but the HOA fees are outrageous.

However, the game opens up a great deal at this point, and canny players can test their mettle against areas they really aren’t supposed to be in to grab tons of equipment they’re not supposed to have. So it was that by the time I had crossed the two small areas between Rabanastre and Jahara, I had packed on over a dozen levels and adorned myself with some very high-tier equipment. But the greatest allure of these areas is the severed limbs of greasy monsters.

See, as in most RPG’s, the player can always go spelunking in some haunted ruin and rummage through random hope chests and clay pots inexplicably containing plate armor and magic staves of calamitous power, but FFXII has something else up its sleeve, too: the bazaar.

Allow me a tangent here. Er, again. Just.. just go with it.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “A Travelog of Ivalice, Part 8: It Would Be So Nice”

 


 

Resident Evil 5 #4: Who Are We After Again?

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Mar 1, 2022

Filed under: Streaming 14 comments

Twenty-four minutes. That’s how long Chris and I fought the boss at the end of last week’s video. It doesn’t help that the plot seems to have lost its way, leaving us to blunder from one pointlessPointless for our heroes. The scenes serve the writer’s goals, but the protagonists are doing a lot of things that don’t clearly advance their goals. catastrophe to the next.

It feels like we should just leave and call in an airstrike, because there doesn’t seem to be anything here that doesn’t need to be killed or destroyed. But instead we’re blundering through this circus on foot, getting dragged into protracted fights with boring repetitive boss monsters with no relevance to the plot.I GUESS we’re supposed to be invested in Chris’ idiotic no-stakes search for Jill. Which… ugh. I’ll interrogate that once we get to the “reveal”.

Anyway, here’s the madness from last week:

I don’t know what to make of that boss fight.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Resident Evil 5 #4: Who Are We After Again?”

 


 

Diecast #373: Tough as Nails Dream

By Shamus Posted Monday Feb 28, 2022

Filed under: Diecast 93 comments

I’m a cynical guy, and even I never predicted anything this bad. The modern gaming industry is one where you use a privacy-invading storefront to buy a DRM locked game where you use an in-game storefront to buy lootboxes to gamble for NFTs. I love this hobby, but I would experience orgasmic levels of schadenfreude if we had another gaming crash like back in ’83.



Hosts: Paul, Shamus. Episode edited by Issac.
Diecast373


Link (YouTube)

Show notes: Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Diecast #373: Tough as Nails Dream”

 


 

FF12 Sightseeing Tour Part 7: Where is my Buster Sword?

By Shamus Posted Friday Feb 25, 2022

Filed under: Retrospectives 89 comments

This week Rocketeer is betrayed by Vossler, the tall, humorless, duty-obsessed military guy who wants to guard the princess. I was glad to be rid of him, since I already have one of those on the team and Basch isn’t any fun either.

In listing his grievances against Vossler, Rocketeer says:

he gets a fucking greatsword by default, while I have to dick around with sword-and-board for entirely too goddamn long;

I hunted in all the shops I could find in Dalmasca. I checked the Bazaar. I stopped and talked to every pissant trader I found. I even hiked to the other side of the Giza plains to Nalbina Fortress and checked those shops. I checked with every merchant in Bhujerba. I honestly thought I was losing my mind. Obviously I’m supposed to have a buster sword. There was probably one offered for free in the tutorial and I somehow missed it. 

Here's the shop interface, in case you're curious what that looks like. It seems like my entire party is behind the curve on gear right now. I'm not sure what I was doing?
Here's the shop interface, in case you're curious what that looks like. It seems like my entire party is behind the curve on gear right now. I'm not sure what I was doing?

I was hours into the game, and Vaan was still slumming around with a sword and a small wooden shield like he was a starting character in Skyrim. It was embarrassing. How did I mess this up so bad?

It was quite a shock when I looked online and discovered that I hadn’t made some ridiculous blunder and I was having the intended experience. All of my characters were using more or less conventional real-world weapons, and I wasn’t missing out on a buster sword, a gunblade, an arm-cannon, a sword made of water, or other stylishly ludicrous weapon.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “FF12 Sightseeing Tour Part 7: Where is my Buster Sword?”

 


 

Let’s Make a Spaceship Part 2: Homeworld Bound

By Shamus Posted Thursday Feb 24, 2022

Filed under: Projects 42 comments

You may remember that last week I made a spaceship model. I think I could do better if I were to have another go at it, but this model is good enough for now:

I didn’t mention it last time, but this isn’t a single ship model. Instead it’s built from modular pieces, and those pieces only cover the starboard side of the ship. I can then flip the pieces around if I want to put them on the port side. This means I can make the ship asymmetrical if I like. Also, I could make it arbitrarily longer by copying sections.

Before we scrub this model and start over, I want to see it in motion. Now, if I was building physical models, then I could hold this thing in my hand and run around the room while making spaceship noises. 

Here's a picture of some kid playing with a spaceship. I don't know where it's from. Some indie game, probably.
Here's a picture of some kid playing with a spaceship. I don't know where it's from. Some indie game, probably.

But since this model is just data, we’re going to have to settle for animating it on the computer. I could use Blender for this, but I’m more comfortable with Unity. So let’s import my model there. 

First I have to create a new Unity project:

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Let’s Make a Spaceship Part 2: Homeworld Bound”

 


 

A Travelog of Ivalice, Part 7: Two Suns in the Sunset

By The Rocketeer Posted Wednesday Feb 23, 2022

Filed under: FFXII 77 comments

The captured party is brought aboard the Dreadnought Leviathan, flagship of Archadia’s 8th Fleet, and presented before the commander: it’s Judge Ghis! I missed him; now that he doesn’t wear the helmet anymore, we can admire that great Archadian hair. Grand Moff Ghis greets Ashe glibly, and demands that they hand over the nethicite. Penelo is reluctant, clutching Larsa’s gift in her hand… but Ghis protests, and clarifies that he wants the deifacted nethicite. He asks his lackey, Captain Vossler Azelas, to clarify for him.

If Archadia would just admit they're annexing half of Ivalice to secure their supply chain for hair product, I think everyone would just kinda go with it.
If Archadia would just admit they're annexing half of Ivalice to secure their supply chain for hair product, I think everyone would just kinda go with it.

Yep, Vossler’s gone all Lando on us. At some point it struck him that there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell of driving the Empire out of Dalmasca through force of arms, and the best plan now is to regain whatever primacy they can for Ashe by cooperating with the Empire, after the model of Ondore in Bhujerba. To this end, they will restore the sovereignty of the Dalmascan line if they but hand over the Dawn Shard, which they reveal is a shard of unthinkably powerful nethicite. Ashe hesitates, struggling to come to terms with the sudden developments, so Ghis makes it simple for her: consent and become their pet queen, or vacillate and he starts lopping off party members’ heads. With a sword at Balthier’s throat, she hands the Dawn Shard over.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “A Travelog of Ivalice, Part 7: Two Suns in the Sunset”