Shamecast: Nier Crashed so We’re Playing GTA V Again

By Shamus Posted Sunday Mar 25, 2018

Filed under: Notices 45 comments

It really is a shame things didn’t work out with Nier. And for that of you who are about to leave a comment without watching the video: Yes, I installed the FAR mod, which legend claims is a panacea for all graphical issues. This claim is false, as the stream shows. The game very regularly had the freeze-frame “crash”, and FAR didn’t help with that. I’m not the only one with the problem. It’s been reported by people for a full year now and if they haven’t fixed it by now then I doubt they will in the future.

I was willing to put up with the crashes to get through the game, but I’m not going to put up with that sort of nonsense during a stream.


Link (YouTube)

New week the plan is to play Left 4 Dead. Yes, the original. Yes, I’m aware that the game turns 10 this year. But see, I’ll be playing with my podcasting buddy Paul Spooner and this will be his first time playing the game. Here’s the event reminder. I hope you can make it. I’m not sure if I can play the game, teach Paul, and talk with chat, but it might be fun to watch me try and fail.

I’m looking forward to this one.

 


 

Wolfenstein II Part 8: Horton’s Heroes

By Shamus Posted Thursday Mar 22, 2018

Filed under: Retrospectives 111 comments

BJ drops into New Orleans to recruit the next batch of rebel scum. It’s a group of colorful characters with various personality quirks that you might find endearing or obnoxious, but are definitely not boring. My problem with the section is that it’s all setup and no payoff. When Grace sends BJ in to rescue Horton, she says that he “[…] has important connections to to the remaining fragments of the resistance all over the US.” Except, once he’s on our side we never make use of those supposed connections.

Ignoring the bit where we got side-tracked with BJ’s capture, execution, and resurrection, the structure of this game is as follows: Caroline’s notes send us to recruit Grace. Grace sends us to recruit Horton. Horton says we should deal with the Ausmerzer. But the Ausmerzer was right there in the opening of the game. We didn’t need to go on the three-levels-deep fetch quest to come up with the idea of stopping it.

Sure, this sort of plot is good enough for a dumb shooter. But it’s not good enough for a movie, which is what the writer seems to be making.

Horton’s Heroes

Left to right: The Professor, the legendary BJ Blazkowicz, Paris Jack, and Horton. Only one of these people will be useful to the rebellion after this cutscene. I'll let you guess which one.
Left to right: The Professor, the legendary BJ Blazkowicz, Paris Jack, and Horton. Only one of these people will be useful to the rebellion after this cutscene. I'll let you guess which one.

We meet these goofballs in the middle of the bombed-out ruins of New OrleansObligatory: But what do they eat?. Once again, BJ is obliged to have a long argument to get them to join the cause. It’s the same thing he had to do with the New York group: We find a group of hopeless holdouts fighting for survival who paradoxically don’t want to join BJ’s band of secure, technologically advanced, well-informed, famously accomplished, and well-supplied badasses. Instead they try to convince him it’s a lost cause. (Which makes you wonder why they’re still rebels. And if it’s because they’re cornered and have no choice, then why don’t they join to escape their current predicament?) Then he makes an emotional appeal by way of vague platitudes and they change their mind.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Wolfenstein II Part 8: Horton’s Heroes”

 


 

The Witcher 3: Vizima

By Bob Case Posted Thursday Mar 22, 2018

Filed under: Video Games 60 comments

Enough futzing around trying to find Yennewhatshername. It’s time to start the main quest.

The Witcher’s 3’s main quest is called “Collect ’em all” (to complete it, you must collect one of every Gwent card in the game) and your first opportunity to start it is by talking to traveling Oxenfurt Professor Aldert Geert at the tavern in White Orchard. He’ll give you your first Gwent deck (of the Northern Realms faction) and play you in a pretty easy match.

This probably won’t surprise you much given the playthrough’s ground rules, but I’m a Gwent man. I got less satisfaction defeating the game’s various villains than I do when I scorch the everloving bejeezus out of an overpowered monster deck. It’s the only card game to successfully make me cackle.

Now I understand that not all of you reading this are into Gwent as much as I am, so I will also spend considerable time covering the game’s various side quests, like the one where you help Ciri save the world from a magical-entropic apocalypse. And from here on in I’ll warn you when there’s a “Gwent part” coming up, so you can skip it if you’re so inclined.

Now that's a round of Gwent.
Now that's a round of Gwent.

Today’s Gwent part is gonna be pretty short, because there’s not much to say yet. Gwent is a game where you deploy cards in three rows (melee, ranged, and siege) with the aim of outscoring your opponent in two out of three rounds. The twist is that you keep the same set of cards for all three rounds, so it can be advantageous to strategically throw a round if it leaves you better cards to win the following ones. The professor gives you a barebones deck and plays you in a match that mostly serves as a tutorial.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “The Witcher 3: Vizima”

 


 

The Shamecast: Are We STILL Stuck in GTA V?!

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Mar 21, 2018

Filed under: Notices 17 comments

I know I’ve been posting a lot of video lately. I didn’t get a column up yesterday and I haven’t had much to say in the comments. I’ll spare you the usual two paragraphs complaining about my health and just cut to the chase: I’m off my game this week. Hopefully I’ll bounce back soon. In the meantime, here’s three hours of my playing Grand Theft Auto V:


Link (YouTube)

As a reminder: Tonight I’ll be streaming some Nier: Automata. Here’s the event reminder for the time. I should be there as planned, although I might not be my usual chatty self. We’ll see if I can get some sleep.

 


 

Diecast #202: Kerbal Space Program, Human Revolution, Hosting Problems

By Shamus Posted Monday Mar 19, 2018

Filed under: Diecast 86 comments

Heads up: An enterprising reader has created their own RSS feed for the show. I don’t use RSS often enough to appraise it, so let me know how it works for you. If it’s good and does what we need, I’d be happy to make this the official feed.

Good news for those of you who enjoyed SolderHawk’s visit in the previous episode: She’s going to come back and visit again in a few weeks.



Hosts: Paul, Shamus.

Episode edited by Issac.

Show notes: Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Diecast #202: Kerbal Space Program, Human Revolution, Hosting Problems”

 


 

Shamecast #3: Still More Grand Theft Auto V

By Shamus Posted Sunday Mar 18, 2018

Filed under: Notices 38 comments

In this episode we surf on cars, ride trains, break the AI, and shoot down dozens and dozens of helicopters. If you haven’t been watching my streams and you don’t have an hour to spend on video, then this is the kind of highbrow gameplay / narrative analysis you’ve been missing out on.


Link (YouTube)

The total helicopter kill count is 32. 8 of those were during the train ride, and the other 24 were part of the rooftop rampage. In the chat it was suggested that a helicopter costs about $120k. Going by that figure, the Los Santos police had to cough up 3.8 million to replace their inexplicably massive fleet of helicopters.

Then on Friday I did another, unannounced Stream of Batman: Arkham City. And then on Saturday night I did the final (for the time being) Stream of Grand Theft Auto V. I haven’t uploaded that to Youtube yet. It’s been fun and we may come back to it later, but it’s time to move on to the next game. I just picked up Nier: Automata. That’s a great game to stream and I’d love to talk about it with you. On the other hand, the damn thing keeps crashing and that’s the last thing I want to deal with while streaming. We’ll see if I can make it work.

I’m not sure how to handle this reposting of streams. In the future. I don’t think we need one of these “Here is the VOD I uploaded to Youtube.” posts every single time I do another stream, and I don’t want to clutter up the blog archives with that. If you’re into streams then you probably know how to subscribe to YouTube / Twitch, and if you’re not then all of this is just clutter. We’ll see.

This coming week the Stream will be a bit later. Here is the event on Twitch, which should give you the proper time in your timezone.

 


 

Wolfenstein II Part 7: Dream Sequence

By Shamus Posted Thursday Mar 15, 2018

Filed under: Retrospectives 118 comments

As promised, BJ is dragged around the country and put on television like a trophy. The Nazis call him “Terror Billy”. He’s given a show trial and sentenced to death.

Worst. Daydream. Ever.

This is complete overkill on the Nazi iconography. You have to play the game to feel how one-note the environments are. It's numbing.
This is complete overkill on the Nazi iconography. You have to play the game to feel how one-note the environments are. It's numbing.

As he’s sentenced, one of the guards turns his back on BJ and you’re able to do a melee attack. No wait, you’re obliged to do a melee attack. The story will literally not proceed until you press this one button. When you do, BJ suddenly breaks his shackles, kills the guards, and steps out of his restraints.Thus begins what is probably the hardest fight in the game.

If you’re taking this escape at face value then it feels completely unearned. BJ snapping those shackles is completely implausible and there’s no reason for him to be suddenly able to walk. Nothing has changed in the story to make this moment possible. On the other hand if you correctly realize that this is a dream sequence, then you also know that the whole thing is just a giant waste of time.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Wolfenstein II Part 7: Dream Sequence”