DM of the Rings CXXXII:
Insert Smiley
In regards to yesterday’s post wherein I “defended” those “lazy Americans”. A couple of people jumped in and reacted as though I really was boiling with rage. The post was intended with a light-hearted tone. I thought that came through pretty clearly in the original post, but in case it didn’t: I wasn’t upset in the least, and I’m still not. I wasn’t REALLY offended by anything. I saw a couple of comments along the lines of “lazy Americans” and I had some fun with them.
(Actually, now that I’m re-reading it, I think the second to last sentence – the one in italics – does sound pissed off. My bad. I’m not really upset with anyone, not even the people who DID imply the “Lazy Americans” stuff. Really, it was a fun discussion about socks.)
This is another reason I’d like to get back to a small-audience blog. I’m just not very good at big-audience stuff. I like writing rants. I probably like writing them more than anything else. But sometimes I mess up, or people missunderstand the joke or miss the humor entirely, and with a big audience this causes more angst and hurt feelings. I’m not going to pepper my rants with smileys or add a “I’m just having fun with you” disclaimer at the end. I’d rather just not post them at all.
Although, maybe this will be self-balancing: If I piss off enough people my audience will dwindle down to a size I can handle.
Sigh.
Damn foreigners.
The Next Webcomic
Thanks to Mr. Myth for this positive review of DMotR.
And while we’re on the subject of the webcomic:
Lots of people have been making suggestions here and there about what I should do next, so I can see this is something people are thinking and wondering about. In order to satisfy some of the curiosity:
- We’re probably about a month away from the end of DMotR.
- Yes, I do plan on doing another comic once DMotR has run its course.
- The next comic will be hosted elsewhere. I know some people mentioned that they won’t visit Twenty Sided if my comic is hosted elsewhere. That’s fine. The comic has more or less consumed my blog, and I’m looking forward to getting the two of them their own space. It’s sort of mortifying when I mention something like my surgery and get over a hundred comments. I feel like I’m on stage and someone has just handed me the mic, the PA system is at full volume, and I start muttering about aches and pains and the trivialities of life. Personal life stuff is small audience stuff. I can do big-audience stuff (the comic) over there, and small audience stuff here. Some people will read one, or the other, or both, or neither.
- Barring a C&D from the forces of Lawyerdom, the DMotR archives will remain on this site.
- The next webcomic will be roleplaying satire. It will not be Star Wars.
I’ll make a less weasel-ish announcement as we get closer to the end.
I’m too lazy to title this post
My post on socks from last weekend has somehow degenerated into a ridiculous conversation about “lazy Americans”, because “Americans” use clothes dryers and don’t cook food from scratch. Some people allow that Americans have a “good excuse” for using a dryer because of climate or whatever.
Using a labor-saving device makes you lazy? Let’s think about that for a second. Am I “lazy” because I use a shovel instead of moving snow with my hands? Is it lazy to use an oven instead of chopping down some trees, digging a pit, and constructing an outdoor fire? Speaking about chopping, how about these sissies who use axes and saws instead of gnawing? And don’t get me started on these people who use washing machines instead of hauling their clothes down to the river and beating on them with a rock.
Obviously, everyone’s definition of lazy is, “people who use more time-saving devices than I do.”
Of course, anytime someone begins a statement with “Americans are…” it’s a sort of warning signal that they’re probably about to unload a bunch of vague, indefensible generalizations. There are a lot of people here, you know? They’re pretty different from each other.
It’s not what time-saving devices you use that makes you lazy, it’s what you do with the time saved that makes you lazy. If you spend that time on the couch wishing someone would bring you the TV remote because it’s like, way over there, then yeah: You could probably stand to get a little more done during the day. But if you save a bunch of time and then spend that time doing doing something productive, then the charge of “lazy” is absurd. Bonus absurdity points are awarded for having the discussion on a website with a webcomic written by an American in his free time. Oh! Of course I didn’t mean you are lazy, Shamus. I was only refering to your family and everyone you’ve ever met.
I’m sorry. That’s too silly. I’m going to have to ask you to stop now.
DM of the Rings CXXXI:
A Profound Lack of Swooning
Socks
The diameter of the chamber in my clothes dryer is about 2 feet, or 0.6 meters. The circumference is roughly 1.9 meters. Movement in there is pretty chaotic, but we can simplify things by assuming that items travel halfway around (from the bottom to the top) and then drop down to the bottom again. So, for one revolution an item will travel half the circumference plus the diameter. About 1.5m. When running, the dryer seems to do a revolution every two seconds. This works out to 42.6m a minute. A typical drying session lasts about 45 minutes, which means that items typically travel just over 2km – about 1.2 miles – while being dried.
This means my socks do most of their travel while I am not wearing them.
I could even this out by washing them less often, but this solution is unpopular with others. I could also balance things out by getting out more, but that solution is unpopular with me.
DM of the Rings CXXX:
You May Now Celebrate
In Defense of Crunch
Crunch-mode game development isn't good, but sometimes it happens for good reasons.
Secret of Good Secrets
Sometimes in-game secrets are fun and sometimes they're lame. Here's why.
Mass Effect Retrospective
A novel-sized analysis of the Mass Effect series that explains where it all went wrong. Spoiler: It was long before the ending.
Good to be the King?
Which would you rather be: A king in the middle ages, or a lower-income laborer in the 21st century?
Punishing The Internet for Sharing
Why make millions on your video game when you could be making HUNDREDS on frivolous copyright claims?
Silver Sable Sucks
This version of Silver Sable is poorly designed, horribly written, and placed in the game for all the wrong reasons.
Megatextures
A video discussing Megatexture technology. Why we needed it, what it was supposed to do, and why it maybe didn't totally work.
The Witch Watch
My first REAL published book, about a guy who comes back from the dead due to a misunderstanding.
A Telltale Autopsy
What lessons can we learn from the abrupt demise of this once-impressive games studio?
Wolfenstein II
This is a massive step down in story, gameplay, and art design when compared to the 2014 soft reboot. Yet critics rated this one much higher. What's going on here?
T w e n t y S i d e d