A July Wedding

By Shamus Posted Sunday Jul 19, 2009

Filed under: Personal 52 comments

My brother-in-law, with my new sister-in-law<sup>2</sup>.  I don’t want to talk too much about them here on my blog without permission, but I hope they’ll forgive me for revealing that they’re great people.  Too bad they live 1,000 miles away.  I love having great people around, but he works in the aerospace industry and we launch surprisingly few space shuttles here in Pennsylvania.
My brother-in-law, with my new sister-in-law2. I don’t want to talk too much about them here on my blog without permission, but I hope they’ll forgive me for revealing that they’re great people. Too bad they live 1,000 miles away. I love having great people around, but he works in the aerospace industry and we launch surprisingly few space shuttles here in Pennsylvania.
Question: If your brother-in-law gets married, is his new bride your sister-in-law, in-law?

Smashing wedding this weekend. Well, it was for those who got smashed, which was a very small minority. Which is good, because everyone had such fun and it would be a shame if nobody remembered it. It was an outdoor wedding, and it’s always a gamble to place that much of your wedding day in the capricious hands of mother nature. In this case it paid off. The weather was clear for the ceremony, which was full of weeping women and beaming men in equal measure, up to and including the bride and groom themselves. They said their vows with conviction, which is always encouraging. I mean, they’re vows. It’s always odd to hear adults pledge these mumbling oaths in the voice of a second grader trying to ramble their way through, “Pedge amegense to the flag”. None of that sissy crap here. These two were getting married, and they didn’t mind telling the folks in the back. Even if they knew already.

<em>Left: </em> My <a href="?p=3871">budding programmer</a>. <em>Right:</em> Me. The tie (because I <em>know</em> people will ask) is <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animaniacs">Animaniacs</a>. The pocket watch was a gift from the groom at the <a href="?p=1338">previous wedding</a>.  It’s stamped with a personal message and the date: September 22.  I always love pointing out I’ve got a watch with Bilbo’s birthday on it.  (Well, Frodo’s too, but of course everyone just calls it Bilbo’s birthday.)
Left: My budding programmer. Right: Me. The tie (because I know people will ask) is Animaniacs. The pocket watch was a gift from the groom at the previous wedding. It’s stamped with a personal message and the date: September 22. I always love pointing out I’ve got a watch with Bilbo’s birthday on it. (Well, Frodo’s too, but of course everyone just calls it Bilbo’s birthday.)
After serving as best man twice and even being a groom once, I must say it was really nice to go to a wedding where I didn’t have any responsibilities besides dancing and eating. I’m always up for lots of both.

As soon as the ceremony ended the weather changed gears. Dark clouds rolled in and began raining on us with big splatty droplets that reached underneath umbrellas and awnings, threatening makeup and meticulously constructed hairstyles. The sun peeked out a few times during the shower, just to let us know this wasn’t going to go on all day. There wasn’t a rainbow, but that’s fine. It’s rude to upstage the bride on her big day. Moods brightened, then the weather.

If I ever find myself involved with the planning of another wedding (odds are good: I have two daughters) I will implore them to do what they did today and have the whole show at one location. It was about fifty exceptionally scenic meters from the ceremony to the pavilion where the reception was held. It wasn’t until today that I realized how asinine it is to have the two halves of the event in different locations. It’s just a lot of hassle to gather everyone up and drive someplace, and then have a cell phone drive to figure out who went home and who got lost. Today we just walked across the conservancy. Why don’t people do this more often? Members of the clergy can do their thing anywhere, and (for us theistic types) so can God. Seems daft to drag a couple hundred people into an unfamiliar church to fight with traffic, parking, and Google maps if they’re just going to have to do it all again an hour later.

As the reception began, the rain let up and left us with a lovely parting gift: Cool air. A half hour of rain was worth it to get rid of the July heat, which would have blunted our appetites and made dancing uncomfortable. It was sixty degrees, which is perfect. The sun came out, naturally.

There were only a half dozen kids but – due to the quantum nature of childhood – it felt like about fifty.
There were only a half dozen kids but – due to the quantum nature of childhood – it felt like about fifty.
After food was the dancing. This was a “no Hokey Pokey, no Chicken Dance” wedding. Controversial, but it’s a position I endorse. (As I said at the last wedding we attended when the Chicken Dance was played, “That’s just so… white people.”) Starting the dancing with Chicken Dance and Hokey Pokey is like starting Thanksgiving dinner with candy corn and circus peanuts.

I danced until my feet hurt, took a break, danced some more, and then hobbled around wondering how in the hell women do this in heels. Was shamed by this, and so danced some more. A silver-haired couple got out and reminded everyone that you never really forget how to dance, and their generation did it for years before they got around to having our parents.

The sun went down, the disco lights spun, and there was a full palette of music to suit people of all different walks of life, levels of dancing, and sobriety. Everything from Chubby Checker to Garth Brooks to Def Leppard to Sir Mixalot. You know, wedding music. The kids danced like giddy savages and ate like Hobbits. They darted in and out of the crowd, meeting each other and forging instantaneous friendships in a way that adults can only envy.

You know it’s a good wedding when the married folks sit together and run through the list of singles, deciding who needs to go next. Everyone went home happy, tired, and full. And a couple of them went home married. It was a good day all around.

 


 
 

Experienced Points: Activision vs. Sony

By Shamus Posted Friday Jul 17, 2009

Filed under: Column 24 comments

This week I make a series of (very) loosely related observations on the passive-agressive threat from Activision that Sony should lower the price of the PS3.

Sadly too late to make it into the column, another story popped up today that throws a new twist on this old argument: Activision is raising prices on games in the UK. I’ve been banging on for years about the fact that games are too expensive. The solution isn’t to charge more, it’s to spend less. Find a spot in the tech curve where you can afford to make games, and stay there, because there’s no limit on how much you can spend on development. There is just no sense in making games that look so good nobody can afford to buy them.

It’s bad enough raising prices when a worldwide recession is in effect, but raising prices while demanding that Sony take an even bigger loss by lowering theirs is a move that requires heroic levels of audacity.

 


 

Stolen Pixels #108: A Young Man’s Guide to Overlording

By Shamus Posted Friday Jul 17, 2009

Filed under: Column 14 comments

Because there is simply not enough poetry in videogames.

 


 

Scratch

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Jul 15, 2009

Filed under: Programming 43 comments

A few weeks ago I talked about learning programming, and I commented that I didn’t know what little kids were taught these days as a sort of “my first computing language”. At the time, I felt like kids should start with something linear and straightforward. Scratch has re-aligned my thinking on the matter.

Scratch is an interesting programming language (or pseudo-language, depending on how pedantic we’re feeling today) that can be used to teach freshly weaned babes the intricacies of software engineering. Well, no. But it packs a lot of ideas into a fabulously simple and straightforward system.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Scratch”

 


 

Stolen Pixels #107: Left 4 Dumb, Finale

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Jul 14, 2009

Filed under: Column 19 comments

An awful lot is going on today. It’s the 4th anniversary of The Escapist. Congrats to all my friends who have worked so hard on it. Here’s to selling off the whole thing to Ziff Davis and the lot of you retiring like kings!

Just kidding. I’d rather you continued to amuse me once a week than got rich. Priorities.

Today is also the final entry in the Left 4 Dumb series.

The Escapist originally began by releasing their issues as a PDF each week. In honor of that, they’ve made a special PDF issue for their 4th birthday. It has a special Stolen Pixels, which is only available in the PDF. Also, they also interview that one oddball reviewer they’ve got. You know, the Scotsman who lives in New Zealand or whatever. What’s his name? Backgammon or something? I forget. Anyway. They interview that guy.

 


 

Kivi’s Underworld:
Final Thoughts

By Shamus Posted Monday Jul 13, 2009

Filed under: Game Reviews 14 comments


Link (YouTube)
You will no doubt be astounded to learn that Kivi’s Underworld is the story of Kivi. His people – the Lumen – are threatened by the secretive Dark Elves. His people don’t see the danger, and it’s up to Kivi to do hero-type hacking and slashing to save them. The story is revealed through uncharacteristically good voice acting that sets the stage for each level. Then begins the pointing and the clicking.

You get skill points as you go, and you can invest those points to provide very modest improvements to your performance in combat. The inventory system is reduced to three slots for holding temporary powerups. During the process of clicking on things to make them die, you’ll sometimes find these little powerups that give a boost to damage, or healing, or speed, etc. Most of the decisions you’ll be making are when to put these to use. As you go, you’ll rescue other characters. You can play any unlocked level at any time, with any of the characters you’ve found. Each character has a single special ability, which is unleashed with the right mouse button. You rack up a score as you go, based on how well you do and how much treasure you hoover up. All told, you can play the entire game using nothing more than the mouse and three keyboard buttons. Finally, there are a series of achievements you can unlock for things like beating a level without dying, or beating a level without using a powerup.

The greatest weakness of the game is that expectations work against it. I looked at the game and expected “Diablo” style play, and was then frustrated by the lack of character development, inventory, or complex spells. But that’s not what this game is trying to be. It just looks like one of those. It’s a short lunchtime diversion. A quick round of scoring points and bashing stuff up for fun. It’s closer to Swarm than to Fantasy-Themed Isometric Hack-n-Slash III. In keeping with this “quick round” mentality, the game starts almost instantly and is basically free of any sort of loading-screen nonsense.

kivi3.jpg
As a fan of “spreadsheet” RPG’s, I do find myself looking at Kivi and wishing there was more to do. Based on comments I’ve seen in the past, I know this game is precisely what some people are looking for. I’m worried they’ll skip it because it looks like games they don’t enjoy. If you hate the flow-breaking Diablo flea market, iterative character development that has you throw out early characters, and managing an array of complex hotkeys, then Kivi is crafted with your tastes in mind.

When I review a game I usually have a laundry list of things I would have changed or done differently. I really enjoy this part of the review for indie games, because in most cases I know there’s a good chance the designer will read the review and will likely get some sort of benefit from it, even if they disagree with my conclusions. But I don’t know that I can do that here. Nearly every suggestion I could make would drag the game away from its intent. There are layers of strategy and depth and complexity that could be added, but none of them would fit within the scope offered by Kivi’s Underworld. Most of them would center around making the game more complicated, because that is what scratches my particular itch. (Besides, Steven Peeler did solicit suggestions for his next game, and I had my say there.)

Despite the game falling pretty far out of my personal Venn Diagram of features, I still manage to find the game to be a rewarding diversion. As a nice bonus, the multiplayer expansion was recently released. I’m excited to see a nice, integrated multiplayer solution in the hands of an indie developer.