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DM of the Rings LXV:
Gross Misallocation of Resources
Previous in DM of the Rings: DM of the Rings LXIV: A Shocking Revelation | Next in DM of the Rings: DM of the Rings LXVI: Repaying the Advance |
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While often nothing the players do makes any sense at all within the contex of the gameworld, you can be sure they will fixate on any and all flaws in the thinking on the part of NPCs.
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Previous in DM of the Rings: DM of the Rings LXIV: A Shocking Revelation | Next in DM of the Rings: DM of the Rings LXVI: Repaying the Advance |
68 comments. Quick! Add another to see if this message changes!
That horsef—er joke just never gets old.
Those are some pretty cool-looking bracers that ol’ Legolas is sporting. What kind of enchantment do you figure they have on them?
Ooo. I hear you, Shamus.
“Those are some pretty cool-looking bracers that ol’ Legolas is sporting. What kind of enchantment do you figure they have on them?”
Rainbow Bracers – +2 Dexterity and +1 Rainbow Power
No the bracers are +3 Dex -10 Wis -10 Int +2 Str. Why he wears them though that’s the real question.
True words, I always say Gamemasters should look for the cat’s sixth leg, because the fifth is always found by the players.
‘Paid in advance’ – darn it, my *players* read this, too!
This is what happens when you let NPCs make decisions for players. Munchkins never accept them. DMs should let guys like that go ahead and fight the wizard in the tower and get annihilated in the process. It’s more fun that way. Then everyone can play Star Wars. ^_^
Then the munchkins can play astromech droids.
With mounted turbolasers.
“..they will fixate on any and all flaws in the thinking on the part of NPCs.”
Like you said before, Shamus, they become freakin’ Sun Tzu.
Makes you wonder what kind of specialist wizard Gandalf is. Maybe he worked around the rules and chose divination as a prohibited school.
He’s a Celestial Outsider; most of his magic is inherent spell-like powers.
Bracers of Clarity, giving Legolas the power to point out the bleeding obvious every time he opens his mouth.
I can’t watch this trilogy now without thinking about these clowns.
“Makes you wonder what kind of specialist wizard Gandalf is. Maybe he worked around the rules and chose divination as a prohibited school.”
A Wizard in Middle Earth isn’t an occupation. It’s a RACE. And magic works differently in Middle Earth than in regular D&D worlds.
Think of Gandalf as an emissary of the gods.
Sisko is a much better Emissary.
Bah.
Everyone knows that Gandalf isn’t a Wizard. He’s a Bard.
Think about it.
Have you ever seen him cast a non-enchantment spell? Or a high-level spell in general?
How about his leadership capabilities?
His ability to know every freaking detail possible?
Honestly, the best way to represent Gandalf in D&D is a Bard.
*Laughs* Yeah, the “Eomer as a ‘horsemasexual’” jokes never get old in my group, either. And I’m talking as a major Eomer fan, btw.
The horsef***er joke and the Legolas is a girl joke, neither of them ever get old. What’s happening with Dave and the guys playing Star Wars.
Oh, and he also has no spellbook, making him a Sorc of Bard.
And Diplomacy is obviously a class skill.
Yep, by these rules he’s a bard. He has talents with weapons although doesn’t like armor, his “magic” mostly involves lore, breaking enchantments and influencing people and works more to inspire others to greatness than to do great deeds himself.
Actually, Robert’s right. He’s a celestial outsider.
From Wikipedia:
“Gandalf was the best-known of the Maiar of Valinor, a servant of the Valar, the Powers of the world, and of Eru Ilúvatar, the One. In Valinor he was known as Olórin, and was said to be the wisest of the Maiar. He dwelt in the gardens of Irmo and was the pupil of Nienna, the patron of mercy. When the Valar decided to send the order of the Wizards to Middle-earth in order to counsel and assist all those who opposed Sauron, Olórin was proposed by Manwë.”
He isn’t a wizard in the D&D sense. All of his abilities, including leadership and skills and knowledge, stems from his being one of the Maiar.
Just because he’s from another plane doesn’t mean he’s not a Bard, and doesn’t mean that all his powers come from his race.
If that were the case, he would have the same powers as Saruman (another Maiar), yet the powers demonstrated are very different.
Saruman is a Maiar Wizard, though his specialty may not be able to be determined from what we know.
Gandalf is a Maiar Bard.
I wouldn’t say bard, since he doesn’t use music or poetry as a focus of his power. But that’s the kind of role he plays, surely. I’d say he’s some kind of prestige class combining loremaster, leadership and a modicum of physical combat. Or maybe he just has a few fighter levels for hit points and proficiencies ;)
I agree with ShadoStahker that Saruman clearly has a different class than Gandalf, and wizard seems to fit the bill.
maybe he multiclasses.. high-level ranger (for Two Weapon Fighting), low level monk for Deflect Arrows. Low level druid for Heat Metal and a low-level sorceror (Light, Protection From Evil and Dispel Magic)..
Never got high level enough for Sending apparently.. and he’s got a staff that can do Telekinesis. Notice that he seems to lose that ability once he lost his staff.
No the bracers are +3 Dex -10 Wis -10 Int +2 Str. Why he wears them though that’s the real question.
-10 Wis and -10 Int? My guess is he put them on not knowing what they were and now can’t figure out how to take them off.
Don’t forget about the movie scene where Gandalf and Sauruman are shouting at each other–from the mountains to Isengard! Pretty bard-like if you ask me.
Most of this Gandalf as Wizard / Bard debate stems from which work you are looking at: Book or Movie.
Me? I jump between the two freely if I think there’s a joke in it.
Woerlan Says:
February 19th, 2007 at 7:05 pm
Actually, Robert’s right. He’s a celestial outsider.
From Wikipedia: (blah, blah)
The absolutely worst thing about the internet is that all that really cool but somewhat useless trivia you discovered the hard way, and had stored up for decades, just for a moment like this, can now be found by anyone with access to Google and Wikipedia.
**sigh**
Telas
“Those are some pretty cool-looking bracers that ol’ Legolas is sporting. What kind of enchantment do you figure they have on them?”
They’re actually Bracers of Masculinity/Femininity, but being Legolass nobody noticed the sex-change, or for that matter can be entirely sure which direction it was in…
“No the bracers are +3 Dex -10 Wis -10 Int +2 Str. Why he wears them though that’s the real question.”
He put them on once, and could think of a reason to take them off.
Bravo Hal, The best joke of the bunch. Woot
Ah, some food and drink in a scene. My PCs would want to know exactly what kind of beer it was and where the food came from so they could break down the agricultural economy of Theoden’s people. Some ale and some stew would not cut it, and If I said wine then an argument would begin about whether or not his folk had the brains or the the weather to make it. Sigh.
Perhaps, before he put them on, Legolas had like… 50 int. and 50 wis. (because of very high levels). He might just want to be a bit more normal because, who wants to be smart all the time? It just gets boring.
Oh yah, and why is everyone talking about the bracers? They weren’t really important in the joke, so why is everyone talking about them. Boredom? Weirdness? Why?
“Using a high-level wizard as a messenger.”?? I thought that they determined that Gandalf was a 0-level wizard back in Episode LV.
It’s clear Gandalf went to fetch help because he likes the idea of being thought of as a powerful wizard who can do anything–he doesn’t want them to know he’s crap in a fight.
Note that Bards need to use a Perform skill, nothing more. Some DMs may disagree, but I’ve found that Oratory is generally allowed, and is what I’d use for Gandalf.
I kina figured those bracers were +4 Bracers of Surfer Dudeism since Legoless spends large portions of the movie doing surfer/skateboarder moves.
If I remember right, in the book the characters pretty much echo Shamus’s characters thinking but get railroaded into Helms Deep by their inflated sense of honour. I guess they were all Lawfull Doomed.
Steve.
“Woerlan Says:
February 19th, 2007 at 7:05 pm
Actually, Robert’s right. He’s a celestial outsider.
From Wikipedia:
Gandalf was A FAG”
Teague says:
From Wikipedia:
Gandalf was A FAG?
Lol. That might explain his predispositional fondness for young male hobbits. Makes you wonder what he’s thinking whenever he’s smiling at Frodo.
@_@
Using the adventurers as ‘soldiers’ isn’t that bad of a thought, given how much better adventurers are compared to the standard army fodder. Ever seen/played the Dynasty Warriors games? From what I understand of D&D, it’s like that, but far worse/better(depending on your point of view).
“That might explain his predispositional fondness for young male hobbits. Makes you wonder what he’s thinking whenever he’s smiling at Frodo. ”
Oh man, thats just wrong dude. :S
[SPOLER ALERT: In rereading what I wrote below, it reads harsher than I intended. Verily, I meant no harshness at all. And I have found the best way to impart tone to e-communication is to preface said e-comm with a description of the tone that the author wishes to convey, or a desctiption of the tone that the author is trying to avoid. Now that the disclaimer is longer than the post, I can stop typing said disclaimer and you can start reading the post below. END SPOILER.]
Hey Shamus -
How’s come Legolas says in Frame 1: “So, here’s plan…” Do his bracers have some sort of ability to remove definite articles from his speech?
How’s come Legolas says in Frame 1: “So, here’s plan…” Do his bracers have some sort of ability to remove definite articles from his speech?
You lost me. If I mangled grammar, I did it in ignorance, because it scans properly to my eye.
The idea was that Legolas was going to try and sneak a few lines in, but Gimli cut him off because Gimli likes to tell people How It Is.
Phil… love the bracers idea… that was hilarious.
And Shamus, keep this thing rolling, it is great. Im sad Ive caught up to the current episode.
So is there a brothel at helm’s deep?
So is there a bothel?
It occurs to me that these PCs aren’t preoccupied with alignment (until they mentioned switching sides, last page), when the source material is all about making the choice “between what is easy and what is right”. In some ways, Shamus, you have reinvented the parts of MAD magazine (but I like a backlit page, I do) I enjoyed so much. This is grand version of “Scenes we’d like to see” and a movie satire strategy.
Again, well done.
3700 xp for the work so far. You can level up, but consider adding a few bluff ranks.
You now must face the dreaded LION’S GATE, destroyer of off-license products.
I should have been more direct. Shouldn’t he say, “Here’s *the* plan”?
Carl: I’m sure I wouldn’t know what you’re talking about. It says “the”! It has always said “the”! Because it’s always been there, and not added recently to cover my near-illiteracy!
Of COURSE “The” has always been there, thanks to the Minstry of Truth.