Resident Evil 5 #3: Gone Fishin’

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Feb 22, 2022

Filed under: Streaming 57 comments

In this episode, the main characters finally corner the guy we’ve been chasing for most of the game. And instead of arresting him, or hitting him, or shooting him, or hurting his feelings, or doing anything else that might somehow advance his goals, Chris Redfield just glares at the guy while asking stupid questions. The bad guy is able to inject himself with stuff and turn into a huge monster and our alleged hero doesn’t do anything about it.

Have I mentioned that I hate Chris Redfield? He’s just THE WORST. He’s a no-nonsense musclebro badass tough guy… who is completely, hilariously passive and impotent in every cutscene.

Let’s take the zombies out of the equation. Let’s just imagine a cop that behaves the way Chris Redfield does…

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Resident Evil 5 #3: Gone Fishin’”

 


 

Diecast #372: Caves, Death, and Japanese Spider-Man

By Shamus Posted Monday Feb 21, 2022

Filed under: Diecast 113 comments

If I had a sign in my office that read, “WE HAVE GONE ___ WEEKS WITHOUT COMPLAINING ABOUT THE ENDING OF MESS EFFECT 3,” then that blank would have at least a 15 in it. Until today, when I’d have to erase that number and replace it with a 0.



Hosts: Paul, Shamus. Episode edited by Issac.
Diecast372


Link (YouTube)

Show notes: Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Diecast #372: Caves, Death, and Japanese Spider-Man”

 


 

FF12 Sightseeing Tour Part 6: The Sand, See?

By Shamus Posted Friday Feb 18, 2022

Filed under: Retrospectives 71 comments

This week The Rocketeer escorts us through the Ogir-Yensa Sandsea. I love the Sandsea. Well, I love the premise, anyway. This section of the game kinda drags on for a little too long, and there are a couple of annoying “gotcha” enemies in the area that can ruin your day if you haven’t been reading the game designer’s mind.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “FF12 Sightseeing Tour Part 6: The Sand, See?”

 


 

Let’s Make a Spaceship Part 1: Just Like the Old Days

By Shamus Posted Thursday Feb 17, 2022

Filed under: Projects 80 comments

Long-time readers have heard this story before. I decided to spend “a couple of hours” making something. Those hours turned into days. Pretty soon I was stealing hours that I was supposed to be spending on the blog. So to cover up my crime, I decided to write about the project. 

I’ve said before that I was a 3D artist back in the 90s. The truth is that I wasn’t great at it. I’m like 85% engineer and 15% artist,You can really see this in my novels. so a lot of my work was very plain and literalist. It was technically solid and I was really good at shaving off extra polygons, but you shouldn’t come to me if you’re looking for something that will invoke a mood or a specific art style. I think I served my employer much better when I left behind the art world and switched to programming full-time.

A few weeks ago I came across this video, where ex-Mythbuster Adam Savage talks about making physical models for the Star Wars prequel trilogy:


Link (YouTube)

At the five minute mark he talks about the process of adding greebles to the surface of a space station. He talked about coming up with “a story” for the thing you’re building. Like, a surface panel falls off, so that means the area under it gets these streaks of rust. 

This is exactly the sort of work I struggled with. I’d make (say) a building or whatever, and it would be “too perfect”. Too uniform. Too simple. I’d try to add some detail (maybe some air conditioning blocks or whatever) to make it interesting, but it never felt right. I’d add detail in one spot, and then the rest of it would look more bare. So I’d add more. And more. And pretty soon I’d have this odd lumpy thing with a noisy outline that didn’t look or feel genuine. It was both too busy and yet still somehow lacking in detail???

I thought Savage’s “tell a story” approach was an interesting one, and I wondered if it would help me. 

So! I’m going to make a spaceship and see what I get.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Let’s Make a Spaceship Part 1: Just Like the Old Days”

 


 

A Travelog of Ivalice, Part 6: Sandseas, Sigil Stones, and Staircases of Dicks

By The Rocketeer Posted Wednesday Feb 16, 2022

Filed under: FFXII 43 comments

After fleeing Marquis Ondore’s swank crib, the game wastes no time in dropping you right off at the start of the next area. Balthier, for the third time at least, caresses his ego by showing off features of his ship, this time a cloaking device he borrowed from a StarCraft Wraith. It’s sadly not inaccurate to say that the first and only cool thing Balthier ever stole was his ship and he has just been riding that good feeling ever since as a “sky pirate.” Vaan and Penelo’s bickering prompt Balthier to baldly lampshade the couple’s status as the comic relief, because sometimes the game is as unkind to me as I am to it.

Man, can you believe Ondore not only met with but actually handed over to the Imperials not only Basch but two unaffiliated career criminals and two random peasant children to massacre an Archadian dreadnought crew, rescue a princess, and escape? I guess it makes sense because if Vaan hadn't been on board with the Dusk Shard, the entire plot would have been derailed.
Man, can you believe Ondore not only met with but actually handed over to the Imperials not only Basch but two unaffiliated career criminals and two random peasant children to massacre an Archadian dreadnought crew, rescue a princess, and escape? I guess it makes sense because if Vaan hadn't been on board with the Dusk Shard, the entire plot would have been derailed.

The task now is to cross the Sandsea. They aren’t just being poetic with the name, either; the sand here is special, and flows like water in a vast, sprawling mass stretching beyond the horizon. Basch describes it as larger still than all of Dalmasca and booooy he ain’t even kidding. This is the first time the game drops you off at the beginning of an immense stretch of wasteland or ruins and says, “have at it, we’ll start up the plot again on the other side.” From here on out, this is more or less how the game functions, and I’ll be perfectly honest: I think the game gains something from this. There’s just something about peering out over the trackless wastes, with nothing on the other side but some magic-charged ruin lost to the mists of history, and fighting my way to the very bottom of it in search of some relic or other that just whips me into the adventuring mindset.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “A Travelog of Ivalice, Part 6: Sandseas, Sigil Stones, and Staircases of Dicks”

 


 

Resident Evil 5 #2: A Miner Setback

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Feb 15, 2022

Filed under: Streaming 40 comments

Tonight at 7pm, you can join Chris and I on his Twitch channel as we guide our hapless protagonists from one ill-advised misadventure to another.

I have to make a minor correction: Last week I claimed that the developers designed the game with the intention that Sheva gets the rifle and Chris gets the shotgun. Since we did it the other way, the game was always giving us the wrong ammo. It turns out I was wrong about the cause of this problem.

As it turns out, the game does this no matter what weapons you have. If Sheva breaks open a container, then the game creates ammo for Chris. If Chris opens something, he gets ammo for Sheva. We played for two hours last week, and this behavior was incredibly consistent. I opened countless containers in this play session, but the only time I got shotgun shells was when Chris opened a container.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Resident Evil 5 #2: A Miner Setback”

 


 

Diecast #371: Multi-factor Filibuster

By Shamus Posted Monday Feb 14, 2022

Filed under: Diecast 101 comments

This week, Paul is the one that showed up with a fistfull of topics, and I’m the one who… doesn’t. I could get used to this.



Hosts: Paul, Shamus. Episode edited by Issac.
Diecast371


Link (YouTube)

Show notes: Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Diecast #371: Multi-factor Filibuster”