Okay, I get why they put a Playboy magazine collection game in Mafia II. Although, if they’re such fans of the female form, then can someone explain to me why all the women in the game look like THIS:
Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Stolen Pixels #253: The Playboy”
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You know what I think we’ll see in Mass Effect 3? How about: Aliens attack New York. Combat is more fast-paced and focused on hitting enemy weak spots. Commander Shepard has a new melee-focused character class available so he can punch and kick the Reapers to death. While all of this sounds like stupid stuff I would make up because I’m often a sarcastic crank, this is actually from an article at Eurogamer.
You know what I want? I want the next Gears of War game to come out to find Marcus Fenix has traded in his refrigerator armor for a uniform, and he levels up his abilities as he adventures around helping people. He spends most of his time having long conversations about Big Ideas, philosophy, and galactic history. Maybe at the end he will speak to some oracle that will reveal Great Truths about the nature of his struggle and put his previous discoveries in a new light.
RPG devlopers are few and far between these days. (Excluding online games, of course.) Of those that are left, nearly all of them are beating the dead, toothless horse of medieval fantasy.
Just one space opera. That’s all I wanted. I really don’t think I’m being unreasonable.
Oops. Looks like I forgot to link all of the episodes of Spoiler Warning this week. So all four of them are just waiting for you to watch them. Right now. At this link.
Okay, I lied. I have no Spoiler Warning for you right now. We had scheduling conflicts this weekend and we couldn’t get together to record. I don’t want to point the finger at anyone in particular, but I will say that it wasn’t the fault of Josh, Rutskarn, or Mumbles. I’ll let you draw your own conclusions from that.
But! I did finally get around to making a playlist for our Mass Effect 2 series:
I don’t imagine you’ll be wanting to watch it now, but it’s there if you need it for birthdays, weddings, bat mitzvahs, or graduation ceremonies.
Also, a few months ago a reader made some awesome Mass Effect 2 Regina Shepard fanart. I’m using it on our Official Spoiler Warning Page of Weblinks and Webtext. I wanted to give credit, and I can’t find the source anywhere. I can’t find who made it, where I linked it, or when we talked about it. A little reminder would be much appreciated.
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Here is a bit about the tutorial in Homefront. It really is illuminating to compare Homefront to Portal 2. Completely unfair and mean, but illuminating. It’s like comparing Waterworld to Avatar, only moreso. In both cases you have big budget production values and big budget marketing. Lack of success can only be attributed to a failure of artistry.
Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Stolen Pixels #252: Tutorialized”
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So, I just finished Portal 2. I’m not going to say anything about the content of the game. Don’t let anyone spoil it for you. If someone tries to tell you about the game – about any part of it – you should spin-kick them right in their face and run away with your ears covered in case they utter spoilers on their way to the floor. This applies even if the person in question is your mother, a member of the clergy, or a small child. Don’t pull your punches. I mean Kicks. Don’t pull your kicks. Well, kick, actually, I guess. Because there’s just the one. Anyway. Spin kick. Remember that.
The game was about eight hours long for me. It might be longer if you play it in sensible doses and don’t ingest the entire experience in a single all-night bender. Honesty, I can’t remember the last time I did that. The original Portal was a triumph, but Portal 2 exceeds its predecessor in every way possible. The puzzles are more diverse. The environments are fantastic, exciting, and varied. The dialog is funnier and the story more engaging. It has been said that I love to nitpick games. Maybe. But I have no nitpicks for Portal 2. At all. I can’t think of a single flaw or shortcoming in this game. (I’d fault the game for being too short and for perhaps not having enough challenging puzzles, but I haven’t even touched the multiplayer yet, and I’m sure there’s more than eight hours of brain-busters in there.)
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Hey, I’ve got a review copy of Two Worlds II here. I didn’t play the first one, so this is a good chance to take a look at this series and see what it’s all about. Let me just start up a new game here…
Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Two Worlds II”
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So, I’ve played a little Homefront.
I really do hate to hold up Half-Life 2 as the Alpha and Omega of shooters. I know not all games need to be Half-Life. In fact, having too many Half-Life knock-offs would be just as bad as too many Call of Duty knock-offs. But Half-Life 2 has so many important lessons that these other games need to learn.
Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Stolen Pixels #251: Everyone Else is Wrong”
I write a program to simulate different strategies in Starcraft 2, to see how they compare.
This is a massive step down in story, gameplay, and art design when compared to the 2014 soft reboot. Yet critics rated this one much higher. What's going on here?
Raytracing is coming. Slowly. Eventually. What is it and what will it mean for game development?
One of the highest-rated games of all time has some of the least interesting gameplay.
A video Let's Play series I collaborated on from 2009 to 2017.
What's wrong with a game being "too videogameish"?
This is why shopping for graphics cards is so stupid and miserable.
Computers keep getting more powerful. So why do the population caps for massively multiplayer games stay about the same?
A programming project where I set out to make a gigantic and complex world from simple data.
Do you like electronic music? Do you like free stuff? Are you okay with amateur music from someone who's learning? Yes? Because that's what this is.
T w e n t y S i d e d
