Mass Effect Retrospective 47: Space Magic Nonsense

By Shamus Posted Thursday May 12, 2016

Filed under: Mass Effect 291 comments

We were all prepared for some exposition that would explain what the Crucible is, what the Catalyst is, and how it can beat the Reapers. We found the VI on Thessia, but before it could tell us anything useful Kai Leng showed up and stole it in a cutscene.

Kai Leng has a gunship protecting him. Apparently the writer totally forgot that the Reapers were blowing the hell out of the planet and that gunships were getting shot down in droves. I guess that doesn’t apply to Kai Leng? He can just stroll in here without being killed by either the Reapers or the Asari military?

“But Shamus, Kai Leng is indoctrinated so the Reapers leave him alone!”

That’s certainly an explanation a writer could have put in the game if they had the ability to think about more than one concept at a time. But this is a one-concept writer who tried to write a three-way fight, which leaves the rest of us to patch over the gaps and holes with conjecture. And if you head-canon that excuse in this scene, then the very next mission destroys that notion by showing the Reapers attacking a Cerberus base. It’s not so much “The Reapers won’t attack Cerberus” as “The Reapers only attack Cerberus when it’s convenient for the writer”.

After the big “Kai Leng Wins The Whole Universe Because He’s the Best” cutscene, everyone gathers on the Normandy to discuss their next move. James of all people – who I realize I’ve never covered in this write-up but he’s our meathead space marine squaddie – asks why we don’t hit Cerberus back.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Mass Effect Retrospective 47: Space Magic Nonsense”

 


 

Ruts vs. Battlespire CH8: Last “Hope” of Humanity

By Rutskarn Posted Wednesday May 11, 2016

Filed under: Lets Play 19 comments

I’ll spare you a recap of what’s going on in the Scufflescaffold, because this wizard I found bravely cowering in a hidden chamber has furnished a fabulous one. Take it away, Clarentavious.

You mind turning that staff down? This is neither a pool hall nor a busy intersection.
You mind turning that staff down? This is neither a pool hall nor a busy intersection.

So some old man’s yelling at me–in “very small words”–to go find his chambers and get a bunch of McGuffin plates spinning. Which is a pretty good recap, and it certainly jogs my recollection of how much I hate this wizard. I do have a few follow-up questions:

Where. Your. Quarters?

Are. Legs. Broken?

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Ruts vs. Battlespire CH8: Last “Hope” of Humanity”

 


 

Content This Week

By Shamus Posted Monday May 9, 2016

Filed under: Notices 180 comments

This blog has a really steady posting schedule (exaggerated, magnanimous bow) so when it’s interrupted I think it’s a good idea to let people know about it ahead of time:

  1. No podcast this week.
  2. No Spoiler Warning this week.
  3. No column this week.
  4. As far as I know, Rutskarn’s content should proceed as usual.

Some of my recent columns have been about crunch, which is funny because they were written under conditions that – if someone else had been imposing them on me – would have been considered pretty egregious crunch mode.

I roll out of bed in the morning and start hammering away at making content. The weekly column. The Diecast. The post for the Diecast. Spoiler Warning. The Spoiler Warning posts. My duties for Good Robot. Keeping up with moderation and reading the comments. Editing the Mass Effect post for the weekThe series is already written, but I still need to format them, add links, gather screenshots, tag the screenshots, proof them, and address various points people bring up in the comments.. Editing the LOTRO post for the weekLike Mass Effect, the words are already written. It’s just a matter of formatting.. Keeping up with correspondenceI’m super-bad at this, and tend to answer emails in weekly bursts.. Managing the various back-end systems for the blog, the website, and my Patreon.

On top of that is the creative work I do that doesn’t usually end up on the blog: Making music, coding experiments. And then there’s playing videogames. Which – while not technically work – is something that needs to be done if I want to feed the content mill.

All of that together eats about 70 hours a week. I’m not complaining. This is self-imposed and I’m not looking for pity. I do this because it’s fun, and I’d rather do this than have a boring programming job that only eats 40 hours a week.

Like I’ve said in my articles: “Crunch” isn’t that bad if it’s done voluntarily, and in pursuit of your passions. Maybe we need a different word for “I’m spending a lot of hours on this but it’s okay because I’m really into it and I’d rather be doing this than something else”. It doesn’t make a lot of sense to put this behavior under the same umbrella as a job where you’re obligated to work 70 hours a week all the time because some numb-nuts thinks they’ll get more work out of you.

It’s Time to Goof Off

Why did a BEACH become the universal symbol for relaxation? It's hot. It's loud. It's usually crowded. You get wet sand inside of your clothing, which is the opposite of relaxing. It's expensive to go there. It's too bright to use a screen, which is bad since screens are where entertainment comes from. And if you're a white person, you might accidentally roast your flesh with solar radiation. And there's the risk that you'll be filled with existential dread over the fact that you'll never again be as young, as beautiful, or as fit as the people around you. Ugh. You guys go down to the beach without me. I'm going to hang out in the hotel room and stare at the ceiling.
Why did a BEACH become the universal symbol for relaxation? It's hot. It's loud. It's usually crowded. You get wet sand inside of your clothing, which is the opposite of relaxing. It's expensive to go there. It's too bright to use a screen, which is bad since screens are where entertainment comes from. And if you're a white person, you might accidentally roast your flesh with solar radiation. And there's the risk that you'll be filled with existential dread over the fact that you'll never again be as young, as beautiful, or as fit as the people around you. Ugh. You guys go down to the beach without me. I'm going to hang out in the hotel room and stare at the ceiling.

But despite how fun this is, I do need to let off the throttle every once in a while. So that’s what I’m doing this week. I’ll still post Mass Effect, and there’s a Good Robot patch in the works, but other than that I’m generally goofing off. I actually had a breakthrough with my music recently, so if the productivity bug bites I might turn that into a new installment of Bad and Wrong music lessons.

But! Before you hit the back button in search of someone to fill up your insatiable need for content, you could help me out by suggesting some column topics. I don’t always use them directly, but having people ask questions is always a great way to get the wheels turning.

Note that since I’m putting up columns on my site, I have more leeway in what topics I’ll cover. The Escapist never imposed any demands on me with regards to article content, but I always felt like talking about stuff that would drive traffic was the Right Thing To Do. So I tried to talk about newer games and current events, and I tried to go easy on the technical stuff. But now I’m free to write about the obscure and esoteric.

So that’s what we’re doing this week: Nothing.

I just realized I wrote half a column about how I don’t have time to write a full column. (Facepalm.)

 


 

Lord of the Rings Online #11: Easy As Pie!

By Shamus Posted Sunday May 8, 2016

Filed under: Shamus Plays 12 comments

I’m still trying to earn enough money to buy some fancy clothes and some dye. It hasn’t been going well.

My next hopeful employer is Rollo. He wants to hire me to play hide and seek for him.

No I am not making this up, you suspicious reader. You know, I’ve had just about enough of your baseless accusations. Here:

Like the EULA for the game itself, nobody actually expects you to read this.
Like the EULA for the game itself, nobody actually expects you to read this.

Someday we’re going to need to talk about these trust issues you keep having.

Rollo explains, “It’s just no fun looking for someone when you already know where they’re hiding. So maybe you can have a go of it?”

I look sideways. The mayor is actually standing nearby. I need this money, but I don’t want people to know what I’m doing to get it. I’m sort of hoping they’ll just assume I’m having sex for money or something. After looking around, I tell Rollo in a low voice that I’ll do his seeking for him.

“Thank you!”, He replies cheerfully and with needless volume, “I mean, I don’t know how many more times I can pretend to be surprised that Daisy is hiding in the bushes or that polo is right beside that statue over there.”

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Lord of the Rings Online #11: Easy As Pie!”

 


 

Rutskarn’s GMinars CH3: Find Your Swing

By Rutskarn Posted Saturday May 7, 2016

Filed under: Tabletop Games 55 comments

By now, three posts into my series of GMing tips, some of you may be tapping your feet and waiting anxiously for the “real” advice. It’s all well and good to talk theory and principles, but to a novice GM the real mysteries are more looming and practical. The questions I get are rarely along the lines of “how do you maintain the complex illusion of authority with a group of players?” Far more often, people want to know how you go about actually planning a game. How do you conjure up an adventure from nothing? What do you need to plan, research, write down, and what can you afford to fudge or make up? Do you use a template? Do you write stuff down? Where do you even begin?

There’s plenty of direct and practical advice to be given here, and I intend to give it–and soon. But before we move on to such practical matters, I’d like to address and hopefully allay the underlying tone of anxiety I often hear behind that question. The implication is sometimes clear: “I don’t know the answer to this, and therefore, I probably don’t have what it takes.”

But the thing is, you couldn’t know what the right way to plan a session is. There is no right or wrong way to plan a session. Consider the following GMs, all successful in their own way.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Rutskarn’s GMinars CH3: Find Your Swing”

 


 

SOMA EP17: Pathos, Too

By Shamus Posted Friday May 6, 2016

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 89 comments


Link (YouTube)

One thing still worries me about the ARK: Can you stop participating? Can you die? Kill yourself? Erase yourself? What if you become monumentally bored and frustrated with your existence? Sure, it’s a nice simulation and all. But no matter how idyllic the setting, after a few thousand years you might really be done with it. Human beings haven’t experienced lives that long, and we don’t know what kind of mental health challenges that sort of timescale might pose.

The more I think about it, the more I think I’d decline an Ark invitation. Unless it comes with a level editor and some space to call my own. And some tools for composing music. And maybe some programming tools. Actually, this is starting to sound pretty good.

So that was SOMA. The best part of this series has been the interesting comments. People have offered numerous bits of analysis, background, alternate interpretations, and philosophical viewpoints that I’d never considered. This really is a game that gets larger when examined in greater detail.

I feel like I didn’t give this game enough credit in my initial play-through. I went in expecting “Amnesia, but in Sealab” and when that didn’t work out I got frustrated with the crappy monster encounters and sort of plowed through the game. I liked it, but I think I missed out on a lot of interesting things the game had to say.

We don’t get a lot of this sort of science fiction in the world of videogames. Sure, we get a lot of games about shooting aliens with zap guns. And maybe we shoot robots once in a while. But proper speculative fiction? There’s not a lot. And lots of it is strategy stuff like Alpha Centauri, Master of Orion, or Homeworld. Don’t get me wrong, those are wonderful games. But aside from Mass Effect and SOMA, what other major releases feel like someone took science fiction ideas out of a novel and put them in a story-driven game?

 


 

SOMA EP16: Queen of Humanity

By Shamus Posted Friday May 6, 2016

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 55 comments


Link (YouTube)

The scene where we say goodbye to the last human is amazing and made me forget the previous annoying section where I got chased by evil fish. It’s genuine, intimate, and gut-wrenching.

I’m curious: How many people spared the WAU, and how many killed it, and what was the rationale?

I killed the WAU because it was making the monsters that had been harassing me the whole game. The WAU doesn’t make a very good case for itself. At least not directly. Ross claims that if you let it live, humanity will suffer forever. I’m not sure what he’s talking about. We just saw the last human die. And the WAU hasn’t messed with the Ark.