Planet Nerf

By Shamus Posted Thursday Jan 26, 2006

Filed under: Rants 7 comments

Photon Courier has a bit on the pernicious self-esteem movement. This touches on something that has facinated me for a long time. See also this bit from QandO where Dale Franks argues that:

What separates man from the animals is that, unlike them, man is a rational actor. Rather than acting from instinc, or in simple responses to immediate stimuli, we can plan rationally, guage the effects of our actions on others, and measure the harm or good that comes from our actions. Because we can do so, and exercise our will, then being a rational actor also makes us, automatically, a moral actor. So, when we talk about natural rights, what we are really discussing is a set of moral claims that arise directly from human nature.

In an ideal world I suppose this would always be the case, but I’m often shocked at how often we are, in fact, like animals – even when trying to make rational decisions. I’m always amazed at how much our base animal drives shape our otherwise highly advanced world. We write software, design new soft drinks, send spaceships to other planets, compose music, and engage in long philosophical debates on the internet about natural rights. We are, in many ways, a race of highly advanced and creative badasses. And yet, through all of this our primate nature still pokes through from time to time and exposes (some of?) us as a bunch of monkeys dressed up in ill-fitting pants and ironic t-shirts.

The obvious one: The effect of sex on our culture and entertainment is so complete and universal that I don’t think we need to even bother looking for specific examples. Our drive to eat, driven unchecked in a place with practically limitless food and little need for manual labor, has given rise to a massive industry dedicated to helping us to fight that same drive. And despite all the effort, the weight-loss industry is losing.

So what does this have to do with self-esteem? Well, another drive we have is the drive to protect our children. Many people who don’t don’t have kids have trouble trying to imagine just how powerful this drive is. This drive has served us very well over the millenia. For a long time this meant keeping out animals that thought of us as a delicous addition to the food chain. It also meant being ready if a rival society came riding over the hill with the intention of starting a tiff over who gets to live in our homes. Eventually we fixed those problems. Dangerous animals are few and far between, and the ones left are the ones smart enough to stay away from roads and guns. Barbarian societies still exist, but our relative military strength is such a mismatch that they don’t come riding over the hill anymore.

After fixing these two biggies, we were able to turn our attention to the other major dangers to our kids. Antibiotics stopped infections from killing kids at such a fierce rate. Santitation saved millions more. For an encore, we cured polio. By this point we’d stopped almost every major threat to the lives our children. Time to relax, right?

Of course not. The drive to protect children is still there. Each generation comes to see the world as they find it as “normal”, and when they grow up they will have a whole different scale for what they consider to be “dangerous”. They still want to make the world a better place for their kids, which is a bit tricky since it’s already pretty great, kid-wise. So what’s next?

Dangerous playground equipment. Dangerous toys. Choking hazards. None of these problems got suddenly worse, it’s just that the previous top dangers were eliminated, and stuff like this made it into our collective “most wanted” list. No longer content with protecting kids from death, we’re moving on to protecting them from little cuts & abrasions, and the very odd chance they might choke on a random toy. So now our playground equipment is safer, toys are rounded off and no longer launch anything, and anything smaller than a basketball is labeled as a choking hazard. Sure, playgrounds are a little less fun, some toys are less interesting, and we have warning labels written for morons plastered over everything, but we might have saved a life or at least an eyeball. And just one life makes all this hassle worthwhile, right?

At this point it should become obvious that we’re dealing with the law of diminishing returns. These changes are starting to cost us something and aren’t giving us a lot more safety. But we’re not done!

Ban fireworks. Mandatory bike helmets. Bus everyone that lives more than ten feet from school. Enact laws that dictate how and where you may build yourself a swimming pool, and how you may use it. Ban television shows that show people doing dangerous things, or add long stupid pre-show “don’t try this at home” warnings. Make sports more non-agressive and non-competitive.

At this point we’re no longer dealing with random external dangers. We’re talking about eliminating risks that people choose to take. And still it goes on. Each generation comes forward with the self-assigned mission to make the world safer for our children. Now we live in a foam-padded world where the biggest danger that faces our kids is that they might have their feelings hurt. This is about as good as life gets. And even that risk can’t be tolerated.

The people who advocate this silly business need to realize that there is no end to this. The kids will never be “safe”. They are on a fool’s errand, acting on a base drive that pushes them to advocate ever more irrational measures. The worst thing about these people is that as they advocate increasingly preposterous public policy in the name of safety, they do so at the bidding of an instinct that has become a sort of collective obsessive-compulsive disorder. Despite this, when these fancy-pants monkyes start grunting and shrieking about “self-esteem”, they believe they are being rational.

Keep piling up the banannas, monkeys… but I think you have plenty.

 


 

Chizumatical Sabatical

By Shamus Posted Thursday Jan 26, 2006

Filed under: Nerd Culture 0 comments

So Steven Den Beste’s Chizumatic is still down. His site went down when he moved to Seattle a couple of weeks ago (Just in time to lose the superbowl to the Steelers, too bad!) and hasn’t re-appeared since. Geeze Steven, whats the holdup? Need an extention cord? Help unpacking boxes? Maybe go over to your new neighbor and borrow a cup of DSL?

Chizu was one of my never-miss-it stops for the day. I need to seriously start thinking about finding a new anime blog. This is a bit tricky. A lot of anime fans aim for the more boobies-and-robots end of the spectrum, and I tend to enjoy the more thoughtful and slower-paced stuff.

Barring that, I should at least learn to stop clicking on my Chizumatic bookmark every morning. Sheesh.

 


 

But I knew this already

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Jan 25, 2006

Filed under: Links 2 comments

You scored as Journalism. You are an aspiring journalist, and you should major in journalism! Like me, you are passionate about writing and expressing yourself, and you want the world to understand your beliefs through writing.

Philosophy

83%

Engineering

83%

Journalism

83%

Theater

75%

English

75%

Mathematics

75%

Linguistics

67%

Psychology

67%

Sociology

58%

Art

50%

Chemistry

42%

Anthropology

33%

Biology

33%

Dance

17%

What is your Perfect Major?
created with QuizFarm.com

I’m a software engineer, but I’m not at all surprised to see philosophy at the top. I don’t think I’d make much of a journalist, though. I might enjoy writing a book or something, but profession of television and newspaper writters is not doing well these days.

I wonder… where can you get work as a professional philosopher?

 


 

Optimus Rhyme

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Jan 24, 2006

Filed under: Nerd Culture 4 comments

No discussion about geek culture would be complete without giving a mention to Optimus Rhyme. I would posit that the term Nerdcore was coined in anticipation of the arrival of these robotic minstrels. I mean that as the highest sort of praise. A casual listener may be forgiven for mistaking the music for mainstream hip-hop due to the high production values. However, careful assesment of the lyrics will reveal several ways in which the group departs from the norm. If that isn’t enough to establish we are dealing an indie endevor here, I would add that they demonstrate actual musical talent. As in: they play musical instruments all by themselves and everything.

Anyway, the usual MO of a rap group is to make various implausable claims about being “gangsters” from “the hood” and fighting against “pigs”. By contrast, here is how the AutoBeats portray their origin:

The year was 2000. The Wackacons had invaded the Emerald City. Parties grew listless and nightclubs suffered greatly under the Wackacons’ ever-growing influence. Repetitive loop manufacturers, lackluster DJs and angst-filled metal pushers aligned with the Wackacons and quickly flourished in our once-great city.

It was later that year when fate brought four independently minded Autobeat technicians together. Instantly, their positronic brainpaths fused. Within weeks, laid-back progressive hiphop beats were mixed with brutally brain-teasing rhymes.

It is the primary Objective of Optimus Rhyme to rid the world of Wackacon oppressors.

[…]

Taking the first step toward local unification, Optimus Rhyme rises from Cyphertron's junk depot and feels the reassuring pulse of the Matrix.

I find these claims of being robots and hailing from Cyphertron no less plausible than the fictional backgrounds of other, more popular, hip-hop artists who claim they are somehow involved in cap-busting activities when not concocting “phat rhymes”. While white suburban kids line up at the record store to get the latest hits from MC MadDogBloodKilla and Mixmaster Leroy “I Shot Your Mom In The Face” Brown, these guys are keeping it real by dropping all pretensions of reality. The lyrics are written from this perspective: That they are transforming robots, facing the reality and living the lifestyle of transforming robots everywhere. The world of rap just suddenly got a lot bigger.

I can hear you saying, “Shamus, you have fully established their credentials as pop-culture and retro-culture satirists, but I need more than witty lyrics and nostalgia for old 80’s cartoons. Tell me, do they sound good?”

I would say that they sound good in much the same way that Hurricane Katrina was moist. The same way that calculating pi is time consuming. Just in case I’m still being too coy about this: Yes. They rock like Gibraltar.

I gladly swapped some money for their CD. That is the first time I’ve bought a brand-new CD in half a decade. If you are still overcome with incredulity, I suggest you download the free songs (about half of their available material) from their website and CD Baby.

 


 

Worst Casting Ever

By Shamus Posted Monday Jan 23, 2006

Filed under: Movies 38 comments

Casting for an established character can be tough. The audience is going to come into the theater with certain expectations. They have played the video game, read the book, seen the play, or otherwise gotten to know this character before anyone thought of turning the source material into a movie. If you’re doing the casting in this situation, you have to take into account all the normal parameters of casting (willingness, availability, budget, acting ability, compatiblity with the rest of the cast) as well as the added challenge of finding someone who looks and sounds the way the audience expects. Obviously, a certain degree of star power is also needed. Casting directors can sometimes be forgiven when they misread the original character, or fail to anticipate the audience’s expectations.

However, in some cases it becomes clear to the viewer that casting decision were made with a complete disregard – or perhaps even contempt – for the source material. When the need for star power or the ego of a particular actor leads to a gross mis-casting, fans become irate and feel their beloved characters have been co-opted for a quick buck at the expense of the world they enjoy so much. If you’ve been telling people for years how funny a particular book is, and the resulting movie is trash, you can’t very well wait for the book to get made into a movie again. That was its one shot, and someone ruined it for you because they didn’t care.

Below you will find the ten worst. Since this is so subjective, everyone will have their own nominees for the worst casting jobs. This list is by no means complete. The comments link is down there at the bottom if you feel the need to set me straight. So here we go…

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Worst Casting Ever”

 


 

Steelers going to the Super Bowl

By Shamus Posted Sunday Jan 22, 2006

Filed under: Random 0 comments

I would describe the mood around here as highly festive.

That is all.

 


 

Running with Scissors

By Shamus Posted Sunday Jan 22, 2006

Filed under: Rants 10 comments

Fair warning: Most of the links in this post are mildly NSFW

Rockstar Games, makers of Grand Theft Auto, manage to get the lion’s share of negative press for the content of their games, but they are mild compared to the guys over at Running with Scissors.

I’ve never seen a company like this. At the bottom of each page is a banner that proudly proclaims, “We Support The Troops”. They curse on their own news page, in the forum guidelines, and pretty much everywhere else. The fan art section is filled with crude crayon drawings, bizzare screenshots, and pictures of real guns. Check out the disclaimer at the bottom of the “About Us” page:

This site contains content not approved for consumption by children, senators, religious leaders and/or other easily damaged psyches, those seeking to enhance or establish political careers and/or possessed of delusions of grandeur. If accidentally exposed, flush eyes with cold water and induce vomiting. If irritation persists, sit quietly and watch PBS. Not for internal use. This site and its related products/propaganda are GUARANTEED not to make you go blind, masturbate (and THEN go blind), become a social liability, induce you to act out atrocities that you would otherwise never indulge in, or burn eternally in hell. Running With Scissors accepts NO responsibility for any and all random acts of stupidity or violence committed by losers who may blame popular entertainment media and/or sugary snack foods for causing their inherent basic lack of control. You’re on your own. Thank you and good night.

There is something here to offend everyone. For right wingers, you have pictures of half-naked women holding copies of the game and links to (I’m assuming, I’m not the clicking sort in these matters) porno sites. For the lefties, you have unqualified support of our troops, not to mention a very un-PC video game where you gun down (among other things) rednecks and Arabs. Amazing.

You could read their page and conclude they must be lunatics out to offend the world, but every once in a while their mask of insanity slips and you catch a glimpse of the folks underneath. Occasionally you’ll read an official statement and get an idea of where these guys are coming from. It’s a sort of test: Do you support free speech? Are you sure about that?

Politics being what they are, I’m betting the full spectrum of people from Hillary to Delay, if asked in front of a camera, would support some effort to shut these guys down. For the children.

But now my point:

When was the last time you saw a company that seemed to exist to prove a point? These guys have something more important on their mind than money. There is no doubt they could dial their products down and make themselves a lot more cash. The whole “controversy” thing doesn’t sell games nearly as well as having the game on the shelf at Wal-Mart. They are, on purpose, pissing away profits by making their game so over-the-top that most retailers refuse to carry it. In a lot of ways, I think they are the gaming equivalent of Howard Stern.

I’m a Christian man. Let’s go ahead and say that I consider myself to be devout. People who know me know that I’m given to thanking Jesus for things and praying. I’m offended by a lot of this stuff, but I wish them all the luck in the world.

Link via eToychest.