T w e n t y S i d e d
Hilarious goof:
At the very end of the episode, I’d relaxed and was just enjoying the conversation. I leaned back in my chair and folded my arms and was blathering on about the elevator ride. After the episode ended I realized I’d been talking without pushing the Ventrillo talk button. So I was talking to myself.
No biggie, though. I don’t think there is much new to say about elevators at this point. Still, old jokes might have been better than dead air.
Silent Hill Origins
Here is a long look at a game that tries to live up to a big legacy and fails hilariously.
A Telltale Autopsy
What lessons can we learn from the abrupt demise of this once-impressive games studio?
Top 64 Videogames
Lists of 'best games ever' are dumb and annoying. But like a self-loathing hipster I made one anyway.
Game at the Bottom
Why spend millions on visuals that are just a distraction from the REAL game of hotbar-watching?
id Software Coding Style
When the source code for Doom 3 was released, we got a look at some of the style conventions used by the developers. Here I analyze this style and explain what it all means.
An elevator left uncommented is not a big deal indeed. There was a bit of an awkward silence there, but the elevator jokes have been beaten to death after 13 of these, so it was sorta refreshing ;)
What was odd, though, was how the in-game characters were oddly silent too.
Wait, you use Ventrillo?
I thought you were using Skype or something else that doesn’t require constant pressing of the talk button percisely so situations like the one you described don’t happen.
You haven’t been hearing Ventrilo’s distinctive ‘someone is talking’ beep every time someone starts talking?
Nope.
The commentaries really died off when Shamus missed the button or whatever. I wonder if that’s because Shamus is the one that talks the most or if it just takes 3 to do this. You should experiment, suddenly drop Josh or Randy to see if it gets as quiet.
Also I’m pretty sure that the nuclear krogan thing isn’t a retcon, I’m pretty sure it says that they lived in a nuclear winter somewhere in the codex. That said I agree that it is sort of hard to imagine krogans developing nuclear arms, but then again these warrior cultures never really make sense in any sci-fi (if every krogan kills 1 other krogan that’s extinction right there and it’s hard to picture a krogan who has never killed so…. yeah).
No, it’s easy: the Krogans who have never killed are all dead :)
The Krogan who never killed are all dead, of course.
You know. Fight your siblings to death as a coming-of-age.
EDIT: Damn ninja herons.
I paused to comment on this; I just heard Shamus call someone a bitch. I mean I’m sure Shamus does cussin’ worse than that in the stuff he writes sometimes, I swear I’ve read it somewhere here at some point, but hearing it?
Next Santa is gonna bust into my room and call some videogame character a bitch. (Which thinking about it would be pretty rad, “Santa!? What are you doing here? …Ashley IS a bitch! …Okay then, bye Santa!”)
It wasn’t out of context like your example, and it was definitely not undeserved in my opinion. Calling her a ‘jerk’ would’ve probably sounded weird. I’m struggling to think of an alternative now..
Woah. I didn’t mean it was bad. Santa busting into my room to call people bitches would frankly be rather awesome. Shamus doing it, perhaps a bit less with the rad and a bit more with the ‘How do you know where I live?’ but still generally rad.
Still, not used to Shamus cussin’. I don’t know, maybe it’s because he generally seems like just a nice guy.
It’s a fair point. I conduct myself one way on the blog, and it’s not unreasonable for people to get used to it. The change wasn’t deliberate. It’s just that Spoiler Warning is a little informal and I end up saying things I’d most likely edit if I was doing it in print.
So it’s probably like having a typecast actor playing against type. A bit surprising at first.
Shamus had an extra Ovaltine that morning and was feeling froggy.
Glad you’re doing a few filler missions…gotta get that Renegade score up to save Wrex on Virmire.
I also had no idea that you could “catch up” on missed conversations after missions. I thought you could only do one section of the dialog tree after each mission…and only the big missions at that.
Why do you need Renegade points to save Wrex on Virmire? My first playthrough was so Paragon it would’ve made a paladin look evil, and I managed to save Wrex just fine.
I’ve never actually played the game myself but from what I’ve heard you have to be either totally Paragon or totally Renegade; being Neutral just fails. (Yay for sophisticated moral choices!)
If
you did his personal questyou can talk Wrex down on Virmire with the right dialog choices regardless of your alignment.Edit: Note to Shamus, I could only get the strike tag to work for spoiler protection, not the s tag. You might want to amend your instructions.
How come your entrance into normandy is always so long?For me the screen always started to fade before the light even passes the party.
Krogans are tribal society,but they still managed to make a nuclear winter on their homeworld.Its explained in the codex even in the first one.
Wow,2 renegade points for punching a female reporter without a reason,and 9 renegade points for showing a male soldier so he would agree to release a corpse…
Btw,Shamus how come you never comment on biowares level scaling?Not even as in “Here its done well”.
“How come your entrance into normandy is always so long?For me the screen always started to fade before the light even passes the party.”
Ruuning the game, Livestream AND Fraps at the same time is punishing.
On the level scaling:
Eh. I’m not actually crazy about it, but “fixing” it would make the game far more linear. I’m also never sure how it works under the hood, because you can’t see the level of your enemies. So it just makes the difficulty feel slightly random if you happen to do the planets in the “wrong” order.
The other thing that earns the game a pass is that BioWare games aren’t really about levels all that much. The leveling is greatly downplayed. This is in contrast to (say) Oblivion, where the leveling is really complex and the delta in power is huge. It’s one thing to have auto-leveling negate little 10% gains in power. It’ another to have it overpower the core game mechanics.
Crap. I should be turning this into a blog post.
About nuclear war thing. They state in ME2 that all blood rage and stuff is the consequence if the nuclear winter and extreme tribalisation that followed it. While Krogans never were exactly docile, they were much calmer before.
Oh and you meet a Krogan ‘scientist’ in Mass Effect 2. Oh actually you meet two of them. From him it seems they value the amount of big BOOMs that science can bring to the table. It’s only that if there ever is a solution that can be resolved with violence they’ll go for that one first.
There was a Krogan scientist in ME1 also. I forget exactly where but it was near the end of my playthrough.
I have to say that this was the most entertaining episode yet, & I really enjoyed the colonist-cleansing that happened last time. You guys hung up on the Council AGAIN, & then you topped it by punching out a reporter for no reason. A female reporter at that. Priceless. This is the kind of player-driven hilarity that kept me & my friends playing GTA3 for over a year straight. Kudos unto thee, good sirs.
I loved that conversation… “I agree”, “I agree”, “I agree”, SUCKER-PUNCH!
As for the silent elevator, I think that pushes elevator jokes into the realm of meta-humour. The boringness of the dead air is the joke.
And to a rear-admiral, almost every officer is a junior officer. The name comes from where their heads are stuck…
I’ve gotta say I was sort of disappointed in Bioware for taking the high road and not catering to my inner thirteen year old there. Some snide comment telling the Admiral that he should get back to the rear he came from would’ve worked so well…
And Renegade Shep in ME1 doesn’t seem that far above a few butt jokes.
You can punch the reporter in Mass Effect 2 – only it took me completely off guard, because I didn’t realize you can do it in the first game too.
See, Mass Effect 2’s punch isn’t a choice… it’s one of those Renegade quicktime events, so you have no idea what will happen.
Also, when Shepherd talks to the guy to get Batia’s body back, he says “you should know I don’t leave fallen men behind.”
… except you did, during the first mission. The one guy dies, and I can’t remember anyone at all mentioning going back for his body.
I KNOW! That was… I swear while the renegade options meter in ME is at least consistently in the psycho-ass territory at least it doesn’t bounce around, so you know with the lower options you’re going to end up shooting some people and punching others and being a big dick for no reason at all.
But in ME2? Most of the renegade options are sensible, some even seem to skip dialogue and so forth. It’s more badass and less psycho — well a bit less, at least.
And then I punch a reporter out of nowhere. I figured I was going to shoot her camera, but no! POW.
On that subject,can you punch her in both games,and does it affect the second time?I cant really go through the first one just to see what happens if Im fist happy both times.
You can punch her in both. I affects the second time in so much that she has some lines about you being a big punchy jerkass the last time, iirc. And then you punch her. Again.
Yes, if you punched her in the first game, she’ll still try to interview you, and you can punch her again.
..which is awesome!
I like how Bioware refused to allow her to learn her lesson.
I know I wouldn’t talk to someone that dropped me to the ground in one punch.
And imagine if you had exoskeleton,or even two,when you did it.Youd launch her across the room.That would be awesome.
– Decontamination is, indeed, not an elevator. Decontamination is, in my opinion, more annoying than the elevators. Reasons for this may include:
* I expected the elevators to be annoying. Thus, when they weren’t as annoying as I’d heard, I thought, “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”
* From what I understand, the elevators are faster on the PC than the Xbox, which may have contributed to factor 1.
* Elevators often have news reports or amusing background coversations between the other two characters (“Killing the latter is business. Killing the former is a favor to the galaxy.”) Decontamination just has the laser and the voice repeating, “Decontamination in progress.”
– Disconnecting on them: Love it.
“Are you calling in a report just to cut us off again?”
“You know it.”
– “Why do you ask so many damn questions?” If you ask the hanar merchant on the Citadel about it calling itself “this one,” etc., its reply is “The same reason humans are so inquisitive.”
– If your art was stolen from krogans, you’d be a bit zealous in defending it, too.
– “Junior officer” means someone lower in rank. To an admiral, a lieutenant commander is junior.
Speaking of decontamination: while I’m happy with that not being there anymore, I do miss walking out of my own ship. I know it’s just wasted time walking to the airlock and outside… but somehow it feels less like wasted time.
It would also make it a bit less stupid when I notice I’ve got a dumb helmet on or something. “JOKER. Get this bird in the air, I’m coming back on board to change my god damn hat!”
“From what I understand, the elevators are faster on the PC than the Xbox, which may have contributed to factor 1.”
Not if you have an ancient computer :) Their length depends on how ‘fast’ your computer is. Since the Xbox isn’t exactly a technological miracle, and computers become better by the week, load times on the computer are usually shorter, moreso as time passes.
Noteworthy is that they do have a minimum time. News reports always end properly for what I’ve seen, and silent elevators still go one floor up at a pretty normal speed.
I don’t remember getting paid for the reporter bit – that’s especially funny with the gut-punch.
Watching these, it occurs to me that I have a long trip coming up, and it’d be great to have these on hand between wi-fi hotspots. That said, will these ever become available for download or something?
Also, punching the reporter was hilarious.
Yeah, you can download any and all of them, you’ll just have to make an account with Viddler and the option will show up below the player on the Viddler website.
OK, the punch was hilarious. Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh, BAM! LOL!! And hanging up on the Council again was absolutely priceless. Both scenes had me laughing out loud.
One of the reasons I have enjoyed this series as much as I have is that I am getting to see game responses that I wouldnt normally see, since for whatever reason, I tend to play the game close to the same way every time.
Well done, lads. Keep ’em coming.
It’s Zaxares’ Mass Effect ramblings again!
You know, in the early part of the video, where you guys are talking about high school and dating? You guys TOTALLY sound like a bunch of cynical, aging, dateless geeks.
I feel right at home. XD
On Ashley’s apparently uncharacteristic outburst: If you play through her romance to the culmination, you’ll find out that yes, she is jealous of Liara, and the reason behind it is that underneath the professional facade, Ashley is actually a very insecure woman. All her life she’s struggled and worked hard to advance herself, but she’s never been able to escape the black name of her family. Despite her prodigious talent and skill, she always gets given crummy jobs and nowhere-postings. It’s the equivalent of a professional businesswoman with a Master’s degree being put into an office position where all she does is is make photocopies and serve tea to guests. The brass in the Alliance military thinks her bloodline is “weak”, and if you’ve grown up with that all your life… Even if you’re trying to erase the stain on your family’s honour, it’s hard to not start believing the lie yourself. Especially if it seems that your efforts are all going nowhere.
So when she sees the man she likes showing feelings for another woman… (Or womanoid, as the case may be) Well, as Shamus put it, “the claws come out.” XD
Krogan History: Factoid has it right. The Krogan did actually manage to get themselves up to nuclear technology level. Then, one Krogan probably cut another off in traffic and so the aggrieved party put a knife in the first Krogan’s eye. One thing led to another and they promptly started a global thermonuclear war among themselves. And then struggled to survive the nuclear winter of their own making. This cataclysm basically knocked the Krogan back to their Dark Ages equivalent. Which was about the time that the Salarians found them. The Salarians saw the potential of the fast-breeding, incredibly tough Krogan as foot soldiers for the war against the Rachni, so they ‘uplifted’ the Krogan by giving them access to advanced technology (Mass Effect level technology, kinetic barriers, FTL travel, that sort thing), then sent them off to fight the Rachni.
The Art Collector: You guys could be right, but the way Wrex was describing it, Tonn Actus isn’t so much an art collector but an art RESELLER. He buys up (or loots or steals, who knows) relics and artifacts for cheap and then resells them to genuine collectors for phat profit. If that’s true, it would explain why he keeps his goods in isolated locations and guarded by lots of mercenaries.
Using FTL technology for simple pleasures: Have you guys ever talked to Ashley while you’re in Chora’s Den? She has the BEST quote ever.
Ashley: “A million light years from where humanity began, and we walk into a bar filled with men drooling over half-naked women shaking their asses on a stage. I can’t decide if that’s funny or sad.”
Mikhailovich showing up again in ME2: I would SO love to see him show up again in some DLC or something. :D
Random note: For some reason I just laughed my head off when Ashley was doing the whole sensitive “Your wife loved you very much” and the random Asari just walks past in the background. It was just totally jarring.
About the art collector I think that one thing is collecting, another and completely different thing is enjoying art.
So it’s believable that someone is keeping his things in secret underground bunkers in the galaxy.
That’s what you get in Switzerland.
The quiet elevator was both hilarious and painful at the same time to me because I’ve managed, on occasion, to make short speeches or contextual jokes and give explanations or reports that I thought were pretty good in games like Team Fortress 2 or Insurgency, only to notice after I’m done speaking that I actually pressed the flashlight button (in Insurgency) or the wrong voice comm button (Ins button in TF2 and vice versa).
And STOP SPELLING “VENTRILO” WRONG YOU… YOU… WELL, JUST STOP IT! IT’S JUST EIGHT LETTERS, IT SHOULD NOT BE THAT HARD! HOW COME EVERYONE ALWAYS SPELLS IT WRONG? IT SAYS “VENTRILO” ON THE DAMN THING ITSELF!
Plenty of excuses to spell it wrong. For one, the pronunciation makes it sound as though it ought to have two Ls. There’s also the blindness to routine things that we all get (did you know your car’s steering wheel has the manufacturer’s emblem on it? When did you last notice that?), and people commenting may be like me and simply not have a copy of the program in question (since I’m asocial, don’t have a mic, and don’t let myself play MMOs, I have no need for it…) and so don’t get to see the official spelling.
As long as the meaning gets through, no harm is done. Google searches will likely offer corrections, if that becomes relevant…
Why is ashley such a bitch anyway?Not just in the first part.I mean her jealousy towards liara can be somewhat excused,but shes so mad in the second one because you are using cerberus resources.I get it what they did,but the way Ive played it,I was going down the “enemy of my enemy is my current ally” route.I even had damaging data stashed away for use once the collectors have been dealt with.And we had all the history before this.We even stole a ship for greater good.And garrus,anderson and joker still trust you.Heck,even tali trusts you,despite you having an AI on your ship.But not ashley,oh no,because you are “such an idiot to work for cerberus”,even though she sees what the collectors are doing,and you told her you are just using cerberus resources at the moment,not trusting them.Its like shes expecting you to sleep with the illusive man as well.
This may be the cynic in me, but I think it’s to help “clear the deck” for polygon-mashing between Shepard and another crewmate, assuming Ashley was the one you got off with in ME1.
On the other brofist, isn’t Ashley still with some kind of military outfit? Unless she’s a freelancer, she’d be abandoning her post/commission if she signed on with Shepard, along with the whole possible moral quandary (if one thinks that’s valid).
I’ve always found it odd that people are willing to go AWOL in sci-fi at the drop of a hat. I know it’s convenient, but there are usually a lot of down sides to doing that kind of thing, including loss of income and a hard time getting back into “normal” society when you’re done.
The Normandy’s crew, including Ashley, is still Alliance military. They’ve just been assigned to the Normandy (Anderson has Ashley transferred aboard after Eden Prime), which has been given to Shepard for his/her use as a SpecTRe.
Even Shepard still wears the Alliance uniform throughout the game, and takes assignments from Admiral Hackett.
It’s one of the things that bugs me about ME2’s Paragon ending. You’ve stolen the Normandy Mk 2 and given the Illusive Man the finger. Who’s going to pay all your various crew members? The Council? The Alliance? You? Certainly not still TIM?
Liara does a way better deck clearing by not being a bitch.Besides,I didnt want her to come with me,but just a bit of understanding would be nice.Her dialogue is:
– Shepard,you ass!Why didnt you call me?!
– Um,I died,and then spent 2 years in a coma while cerberus slowly rebuilt me.And then,when I asked about you,alliance had you classified and unreachable.
– You still shouldve called!
Needy and bitchy.
Also,none of the others have a problem.Garrus was glad to see me.And when he found out I was working with cerberus,he still trusted me.Hes not human,he hunted people like cerberus for 2 years now,and he still trusted me when I said its the only way.Tali too.She too is not human,quarians were attacked by cerberus,and we have an AI on the ship.But she still trusted me when I said its the only way.Ashley is human,only experience she has with cerberus is what she saw when with me,but she doesnt trust me because Im “cerberus lapdog”.
I know its bioware tradition to always have a bitch in there,but all the others had some reasons for it.Ashley is just a needy bitch without any reason.
Not that it matters a whole lot, but I’ve discovered that the main difference between an elevator and the decontamination chamber is that while decontaminating, you can call up the inventory or squad level menus and do some work *while the game keeps loading*.
I’ve worked out many a squad outfit / points assignment, only to come out of the window and finished the transition instantly… it ain’t much, but it’s nice than standing still for 30 floors :)
I always thought the warrior nature of the Krogan were exacerbated by entering the interstellar community. Why develop, at great cost, relatively inferior technology that could be bought on the corner from some alien – all the while leaving you time to indulge in what you naturally want to do, stab people with high powered weapons.
Their scientific community probably languished considerably after their nuclear holocaust as well. So things have probably changed allot from the krogan “golden age” of science.
Don’t know if this will get through with junk e-mail address, but this isn’t really for publishing anyway.
Just thought about something that may have an impact on the performance of the game you’re reviewing. If you could have 2 physical hard drives in the system – play game from one, while FRAPS records onto the second hard drive. (If you can get the 2 hard drives onto separate busses, that would be even better, but that may be difficult to find out these days!)
Oh, I remember the interview. My first playthrough I only chose what seemed like the sensible option and ended up just alright. You have to go all paragon to make it like the designers ideal of perfect… Fun fact, my first playthrough had both intimidate and charm maximized.
Also, it is very funny how the council seems more desperate and compliant the more you hang up on them. It’s a nice touch, they’re desperately trying to have any feedback on your actions and you’re just brushing them off. Eventually you break their spirits and they just expect you to cut them at the first chance.
Finally, I know it is way too late, but showcasing the NPCs elevator conversations would have been nice. There’s some interesting stuff there.
Boinking and Punching… it’s like future Californication.