T w e n t y S i d e d

It’s time for Episode 8 of Girls und Panzer, We’re Fighting Pravda! No mystery here; Pravda High School is based on the WW2-era CCCP, or rather U.S.S.R. The Soviet Union. (CCCP only *looks* like CCCP. Let me explain. The Cyrillic words for “Union {of} Soviet Socialist Republics” are “(this was working, I’ll figure it out”; that’s not Latin. Those are Cyrillic letters at the beginning of each word, not actually “C”‘s and a “P”. So we “see” CCCP, but it’s actually U.S.S.R.) Pravda *was* the Communist Central Committee’s official newspaper. If you’re a GenX’er, and some Boomers may still remember, this was a well-known fact (I know from experience my very-late Silent/Boomer father does not remember this, but it may be dementia and other influences). When the Soviet Union ended, Pravda was sold by Russian president Boris Yeltsin to a Greek company. In 1996 an internal dispute caused some journalists to split off and reform, with Greek ownership support as far as I can tell, the “Pravda” newspaper run by the new Communist Party of the Russian Federation. The assets still owned by the Greek business formed the *online* version of Pravda, Pravda.ru. Best I can tell, the two have nothing to do with each other.

But like I said, these aren’t the Russians, they’re the Soviets. Pravda High School is located in Aomori City in Aomori Prefecture, the furthest north of Japan’s main island (Honshu). The actual northernmost island and region, Hokkaido, is separated from Aomori by the Tsugaru Straight. The island is also connected by an undersea tunnel. Many of the students of Pravda are from Hokkaido.

Aboard the Pravda school ship, the Kiev (based on the Russian Carrier/Aircraft Cruiser Kiev, the lead ship of the Kiev class, built in the 1970’s and now serving as a hotel centerpiece at an amusement park in China), Darjeeling is meeting with Pravda’s Sensha-do Captain and Sub/Co-captain, Katyusha (not yet) and Nonna. Katyusha (not yet) is the vertically-challenged blonde, Nonna is the tall brunette serving tea and biscuits (treats). Katyusha (not yet) is lamenting, or rather, making fun of, St. Gloriana’s failure to win their quarterfinals match, while of course Pravda is moving on to the semifinals. Darjeeling just responds that the race doesn’t always go to the swift or the strong. You know how she is. Speaking of the semifinals, she adds, you’re gonna be fighting Oarai. Are you *really sure* you don’t need to be practicing? Katyusha (not yet) laughs

“Yeah…yeah. But their captain is from a famous Tankery school. Nishizumi.” Katyusha (not yet) chokes on her jam and tea. “Why didn’t anybody tell me that?!” Nonna responds “I *did*. Several times.” Katyusha (not yet) says it’s the first time *she’s* heard about it. But also dismisses the concern when Darjeeling points out it’s the youngest Nishizumi. You might remember we learned last year what Miho did to directly cost Kuromorimine the final battle against Pravda. And who was giving the orders for the Pravda team last year?

Katyusha (not yet).

For the record, while Pravda, like all the other schools, is a Japanese high school, just about everyone else named in the series can be identified by their year; 1, 2, or 3. There is a strong indication (in supporting media) Nonna and Katyusha (not yet) are both actual Russian transfers to Pravda High School. Katyusha (not yet) is known to have revitalized Pravda’s Sensha-do team as a First Year, which could technically be any year prior to the current. But neither of the ages of the two characters are given. While they are likely second or third year students, Nonna appears older and Katyusha (not yet) appears younger. Katyusha (not yet) is described (again, in other media) as unusually short, and subject to much bullying because of her small size. This led to a Napoleon Complex, also called “Short Man Syndrome.” Nonna appears to not only be Katyusha’s (not yet) adjutant, but an active commander of the Sensha-do team and Katyusha’s (not yet) primary caregiver. There’s just SO MUCH to unpack with these two.

Back at Oarai the Ankou and Turtle teams are admiring the upgraded 75mm gun (and some armor, which is never really explained) on the Panzer 4. The work on the Panzer and the Char B1 bis was done by the Vehicle/Automobile club. The Tiger (P) isn’t ready yet. I mean, they were NEVER ready, but that’s beside the point. Miho brings up the need for a crew for the Char, when the Public Morality squad (the Hall Monitors) enter:

Mako immediately reacts. Anzu appears out of nowhere after Sono Midoriko introduces herself

Told you. Sodoko responds to Anzu the same way she responds to Mako, but when the Student Council President is already using the nickname, that’s probably the end. Anzu cuts her off anyway, and asks Miho to name the new team. Miho considers the forward turret and long rear-end of the Char, the light olive coloring, and decides “Mallard” would be a good name. I’m sure people won’t get them confused with Duck Team AT ALL. The Char B1 bis really requires four crew…not three. Sure, you can technically operate the tank with only three, but it’s going to be incredibly inefficient. In fact a later redesign made room for *five* crew which made the tank operate even better. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not some kind of wonder-tank, but considering how short on vehicles Oarai is, there might be a better use for this one than short-staffing it with inexperienced crew in the middle of the tournament. On the other hand, maybe being a distraction is the best it can do for Oarai. The topic is open to discussion. Regardless, being able to make it move is step one, so Mako is put in charge of training Mallard Team. Sodoko immediately tells Mako she’s not allowed to have a smug attitude because of her experience or “good grades,” to which Mako responds “So I guess that means you’re gonna read the manual and practice really hard on your own, right?” Sodoko tells Mako she needs to explain everything carefully and thoroughly, and gets upset when Mako responds “Hai, hai”. (comes off as “yeah yeah” in tone) So Mako says “haiiiiiiii” (yeeeeeeees).

Momo gives everyone a “pep” talk about their next match with Pravda, ending with “everything’s over if we lose!” But this time she gets some push back from Rabbit Team (the first years). After all, Pravda is tough, they won last year, Oarai in their first year has already made the semifinals…they really have over-achieved! And next year they’ll be even better! Momo screams

Everyone freezes, and looks shocked. Anzu quietly adds “We have to win.” Then tells Miho to issue orders for today’s practice. And then invites Miho to a meeting with the Student Council that evening to discuss something important.

As Oarai sails north, Momo claims past 50 degrees north latitude, which would be way north of Pravda High School and Hokkaido, Miho meets with the Student Council. Despite attempts to get them to talk about their important information; Anzu, Momo, and Yuzu talk about Anzu’s ankou stew recipe and reminisce about their time the last few years at Oarai Girls’ Academy. In the end Miho leaves wondering what they wanted to talk about, and the Student Council members reflect on their inability to tell her what’s going on. Anzu points out she wants Miho to have as much fun as possible while she can.

I mean, everyone knows what’s going on, right?

In the Nishizumi compound matriarch Shiho meets with Maho, and rhetorically wonders just when Maho intended to tell her Miho had led Oarai into the semifinals. While Maho protests she is in agreement with Shiho’s teaching, Miho is…different. Shiho announces she will attend the semifinals with Maho to officially ban Miho from using the Nishizumi name.

Oarai’s Tankery team meets to prepare the tanks, and the tank riders, for winter combat. Ankou looks for warm underwear and hand warmers, Rabbit Team discusses leg warmers, stockings, and maybe some make-up and lip gloss; after all people are really going to be watching this match. Hippo team sorts through additional accessories that coincidentally match their “soul” personas. Sodoko sprints from group to group reminding them of school rules that ban…just about everything they’re doing…until Erwin puts a hand on her shoulder and gently turns her around:

Sodoko doesn’t understand this at all, but in a sense, this is possibly the most important thing Erwin says in the whole series. It addresses the entire point of the show. That night Miho contemplates battle plans. With Oarai’s enhanced firepower and gunnery practice they *may* have the ability to charge directly and disable Pravda’s flag tank. BUT…if they fail…they have no fallback position. And it’s still their six tanks to Pravda’s fifteen. Plus under Katyusha (not yet) Pravda has mastered retreating from initial assaults, even abandoning tanks as they do, then mounting an exceptionally strong defense and counter-attack. This is, by the way, a direct reference to what happened in World War 2 when Germany attacked the Soviet Union. I mean, it’s kind of a trite summary, but it’s not exactly *wrong* either. She decides a cautious approach that avoids entrapment by Pravda, and avoids provoking them to an all-out assault themselves is called for.

On the battlefield Miho and Yukari double-check preparations for all the tanks, Rabbit Team has a snowball fight, Hippo Team builds an ice sculpture, and Katyusha (not yet) and Nonna arrived to demoralize Oarai. Katyusha (not yet) laughs at Oarai’s tanks. I mean, she literally says “you brought these tanks just to make me laugh, right?” Anzu tries to greet Katyusha (not yet):

Katyusha (not yet) angrily contemplates the situation, then demands Nonna lift her up.

Momo quietly says “…she just put you on her shoulders…” which prompts another angry outburst from Katyusha (not yet). She spots Miho as her and Nonna turn to leave, and thanks her for last year’s win in the finals. She asks Miho to use her talent again this year. Kind of a low blow. But this is what we in the West would call “trash talking.” A brief cut to Darjeeling and Orange Pekoe shows O.P. wondering how Oarai is going to win this match. Not dejectedly, not worryingly, just simply as a matter of fact. She wonders how they’ll win THIS match. Miho instructs the Oarai team to stay calm. They will cautiously advance. All the other tank teams immediately question the tactic in favor of a quick assault (remember, we are very loosely following Operation Barbarossa, when Germany attacked the Soviet Union. German tank/combined arms strategy, blitzkrieg, or lightning attack, had overwhelmed defenses thus far in World War 2). Anzu points out a sustained battle in the snow isn’t a great outcome, either (she’s not wrong, see EXACTLY THE SAME SOURCE MATERIAL). Despite Yukari and Hana supporting Miho’s original plan, she adopts the blitzkrieg despite her own misgivings.

Katyusha (not yet) tells the Pravda team they will disable every Oarai tank *in order*, leaving the Flag Tank for last, so that Oarai will see just how superior Pravda is. And now…Katyusha (it’s time):

The recycled footage is due to this being the full audio, while the episode only featured the first half. And if you watched on a streaming platform outside of Japan, rights management precluded this song from being played. The song “Katyusha” is essentially the Russian version of Germany’s “Erika.” Not *literally*, but it’s the same sentiments and message. The “Katyusha” performance was a viral hit on the internet at the time and prompted a lot of interest in the song. To many audiences, it is the first saving grace of the Pravda team, considering Katyusha (the team captain) has been such a brat and a jerk so far. And Nonna just enables her, let’s be honest.

Take note at this point that Oarai has changed their Flag Tank for this battle. No longer is the Turtle Team in the Panzer 38(t) carrying the flag, now it’s Duck Team in the Type 89. I have mentioned a few times that the Type 89 is likely the weakest tank Oarai rides, and the Panzer 38(t) is actually decent, depending on the use. Now, the Duck Team are better gunners than Momo, but if the gun doesn’t do any damage, that doesn’t help.

It quickly becomes clear Pravda held back and are scouting Oarai. Of course, responding to attacks is their strength so they might have been hoping for that strategy. While scouts watch Oarai advance, Katyusha and Nonna rest in a secluded spot. Katyusha orders Nonna to…do something, we don’t get to hear because Nonna already knows what Katyusha is going to say. With Oarai, the Char B1 bis loses traction as the team climbs a hill. Miho orders the Mallards to fall back for now, but Mako tells Yukari to take over driving and runs back to the Char, where she quickly guides the tank through a zig-zag pattern to reach the top of the hill with the other tanks. Sodoko once again throws a fit, this time about Mako entering someone else’s tank without permission, and instead of screaming “WILL YOU CHILL THE **** OUT FOR A BIT” Mako just replies “Don’t worry about it.”

Speaking of chilling out, Miho has Hana shoot a large snow bank in their way with an HE (high explosive) shell. In the stands Shinzaburo points out to Hana’s mom that Hana fired the shot. Instead, of cheering, Hana’s mom frets that Hana used to arrange flowers with those hands.

Rabbit Team notices a cute squirrel running in a tree they pass. Hippo team, appropriately, brings up that thinking of Russia and snow stirs thoughts of the Siege of Stalingrad, which isn’t a pleasant topic. Miho notices three Pravda T-34’s parked defensively on the other side of the plain they are crossing. She has the team spread out, then orders attacks from Hippo and Ankou. Hippo’s STuG III and the Panzer 4 with it’s new gun disable two T-34’s with a shot each. While the team celebrates knocking out two tanks from last year’s champion, and T-34’s to boot (that tank and Russian tanks in WW2 being an ENTIRE essay, if not school of study itself), Miho worries. The two tanks didn’t even fire. They shouldn’t have even been sitting there parked like that. This is *not* conducive to the quick assault the others wanted, and it’s a dangerous beginning. The third T-34 fires on Oarai then retreats. Miho orders the entire team to pursue, so that’s on her, but even Sayori pauses to ask “Why did they run like that?” The thought is dismissed when Yukari points out the T-34 is running from Oarai’s tanks, right? Yukari should know better.

Azusa, commander of Rabbit Team, is the first to spot that the T-34 they are pursuing is headed toward a five-tank group of T-34s, which includes the Pravda Flag Tank. Oarai enthusiastically attacks and Hippo team disables another T-34. The group, along with the retreating tank, form up and perform a running defense of the Flag Tank. Almost like they planned it this way. Miho finally realizes they are being baited, but ONCE AGAIN the other Oarai Tankery members are too excited to listen to her as she pleads with them to stop.

Pravda disappears over a snow ridge. Below is an abandoned village. Pravda have disappeared. Oarai literally did this to St. Gloriana in their first battle against another school, and it almost worked for them. The Oarai tanks enter the village and start taking pot-shots at the buildings. The Pravda Flag Tank pops out from behind one of the stone buildings, then quickly reverses back into hiding. It does this repeatedly as Turtle Team and Hippo Team try to land a winning shot. Miho, scanning her surroundings, notices T-34’s enter the battlefield from the left, flanking Oarai. She orders her tanks to retreat to the right, but more Pravda tanks appear from that direction. She orders a different route, but Pravda tanks emerge from dug-in gunnery emplacements. This is exactly what she feared would happen. They are surrounded.

Momo, to her credit, is the first person other than Miho to realize “It was a trap.” Miho spots a large, concrete or stone barn or church structure in the only open route. She orders Oarai to shelter in the structure. During the retreat Rabbit Team’s M3 Lee loses their auxiliary gun (the bigger one in the hull), but they make it inside still running. Hippo’s STuG III takes a shot to the right track just as they reach the doorway and stop. Pravda’s KS-2 (a tank that mounts a 152mm howitzer) fires on the STuG III, but Ankou’s Panzer 4 backs into the STuG taking the hit. This disables, apparently barely, Ankou’s main gun but they’re still moving, and push the STuG into the barn. Incidentally de-tracking it’s right tread. As discussed in the past, technically something that can happen without disabling the tank. Oarai is now holed up in the barn and hope to sustain the upcoming bombardment by Pravda.

The attack stops quickly, however; and two girls from Pravda approach under white flag. They tell Miho Katyusha asks them to surrender. She will accept if they all bow to her to acknowledge her superiority. Because of her big heart, she will give Oarai three hours to consider. They then leave. Momo, who is NOT in charge (thankfully) responds “Nuts!” which is from a story you can check out yourself by searching for “nuts surrender”. While Hippo supports fighting to the end, which they think is what Momo is advocating, Miho tells them all that, surrounded as they are, someone could get hurt if they try to break out and fight. The members of Ankou all announce support for Miho’s observation. Momo, quivering with rage, insists that they have to fight, and they have to win. There is no alternative. Miho, gently, argues with her. Why? Why do we have to keep fighting even when it’s hopeless? We’ve accomplished so much more than anyone would have ever expected. We made it into the semifinals of the national tournament on our first try. And after all…

Momo objects, near tears, but Miho continues. There are more important things than winning. She came to Oarai and made great friends. For the first time ever she learned Tankery could be *fun*. That’s why she wants to end this tournament with those feelings intact. She loves this team and loves this school, and wants to keep her good memories alive. Momo reacts like she’s been shot. Miho has hit a nerve:

Momo breaks down and Anzu picks up the story: if Oarai don’t win the National Tournament, Oarai Girls’ Academy will be shut down at the end of the school year.

And that’s when the end credits roll! Classic cliffhanger. This is an incredibly well-worn plot, and I can understand any responses that this is a bit trite and underwhelming. I will give the creators credit, that they *eventually* address this issue after the run of the series and smooth out the wrinkles. But for now it’s the standard “win the tournament or lose your program/club/class/school/home/etc.” story. To be fair, most of you probably saw this coming a mile away…after all Arisa actually SAID this during the Saunders battle. I wish I could say “now you know why Momo is the way she is” but honestly, fear over the school closing is only a small component. She’s just extremely emotional. And in a way, Anzu was right, too. Loading their hopes and dreams even MORE explicitly on Miho could have been really bad; she needed time to heal. But also; now that Miho knows how necessary the win is…she figures out how to win. Our girl picks up the entire Tankery team and carries them to the finish line. Because she has to. Because Oarai is her school, too; dammit.

Next on Girls und Panzer: Last Ditch Effort!

Paige Francis He/him