DM of the Rings LXXXV:
Press Triangle

By Shamus Posted Monday Apr 9, 2007

Filed under: DM of the Rings 114 comments

Legolass, extreme elf.

 


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114 thoughts on “DM of the Rings LXXXV:
Press Triangle

  1. Brian_D says:

    Tony Hawk, thats hilarious.

  2. Woerlan says:

    The combo’s not even done. As I recall, Legolas had time to shoot more than 1 orc. ^_^

  3. haha, thats classic!

    Now if only you could actually use a bow/arrow in Tony Hawk :D

    Another classic!

    But now I wanna know what the total score for legolas was when he killed the giant elephant :D

    1. ZAP says:

      “That still only counts as one!”

      Classic.

  4. Knastymike says:

    Where can I buy this game??

  5. George says:

    I’m going to suggest putting bows and arrows into a Tony hawk game.
    You can have jousting tournaments with spears while riding skateboards as well.
    Haha, he didn’t have to roll a balance check? Ride check?

  6. Scarlet Knight says:

    Ok , everone sing along: ” He was a skater elffff…”!

  7. Blindeye says:

    Legolas is awesome and all, but that move begged to be made fun of. Even though it was great, you just can’t let that kind of thing… “slide”.

    *giggles like a moron*

  8. Kevin says:

    One of my pet peeves with D&D is how combat always seems to turn into an acrobatic stunts competition, especially in a rogue-heavy party. What’s even worse is when the DM starts awarding players for stunts, because it totally dicks over the magic users that didn’t put points in “Tumble.”

    1. Luigifan says:

      The wizards are overpowered anyways.

      1. Luigifan says:

        And magic can be used for stunts, too.

  9. pdwalker says:

    Did you ever have the impression that you played too many video games?

    I’m just sayin’…

    :)

  10. Randolpho says:

    TwiddleStooch wrote:
    But now I wanna know what the total score for legolas was when he killed the giant elephant

    It only counted as one! If Gimli says it, it must be true…

  11. Clyde says:

    Dude, that was way rad!

  12. xargon says:

    So would that count as Mounted Archery or Shot on the Run?

  13. The Gneech says:

    “Fast Acrobatics” combined with “Acrobatic Charge”.

    When building my Legolas clone, I ended up with Rgr 5/Sco 6/ThfAcr 2. Works quite well, actually.

    -The Gneech

  14. phlux says:

    George: The game you’re looking for is Skate or Die for the NES. It had the finest in 8-bit skateboard jousting.

  15. Ace says:

    But when he kicks the board in the orc, doesn’t that count as a bail. I think he got no points out of this one.

    – Ace

  16. Zudrak says:

    Where’s the fish from Spongebob saying, “That was Awwwwwwwwwwesome, dude!”?

    Great comic, once again.

  17. tigerdreams says:

    Kevin Says:
    One of my pet peeves with D&D is how combat always seems to turn into an acrobatic stunts competition, especially in a rogue-heavy party. What's even worse is when the DM starts awarding players for stunts, because it totally dicks over the magic users that didn't put points in “Tumble.”

    Really? Because the thing that usually irritates *me* about D&D combat is the way it always seems to degenerate into a zorch-fest between the casters, by the end of which there’s often nothing left for the roguish Dex-combat types to attack. I think that creative, cinematic combat *should* be encouraged, so that it becomes more interesting than, “I cast a Quickened Maximized Empowered Magic Missile at it. *roll roll add add* 87 damage. Is it dead?” Y’know, so as not to completely dick over the characters who put points into skills rather than into Blowing Stuff Up. Given how much casters tend to dominate the game, it only seems fair to let skillful characters have the spotlight every once in a while.

    That said, I was far too amused with this scene in the movie, so I was glad to see it play out in the comic, even if I didn’t get the specific video game reference until the comments explained it for me.

  18. Steve says:

    tigerdreams Says:

    Really? Because the thing that usually irritates *me* about D&D combat is the way it always seems to degenerate into a zorch-fest between the casters, by the end of which there's often nothing left for the roguish Dex-combat types to attack. I think that creative, cinematic combat *should* be encouraged, so that it becomes more interesting than, “I cast a Quickened Maximized Empowered Magic Missile at it. *roll roll add add* 87 damage. Is it dead?”

    I dunno which game you’re playing, but by the time the casters have such nifty magic missiles in their arsenal in a typical game of D&D the general answer to your question is: “Of course not, dolt!”

    Even as a weakly godlike caster I could only do a fraction of the damage per round that the party’s minmaxed cheddar-rogue could.

    I consoled myself with the fact that it took me a fraction of the time that the Gorgonzola Git did to make an attack.

    [Shamus]

    Good to see some proper “Don Martin” sound effects coming into play with that “Klonk”. We need more of these to convey the missing aural element. The shield should have had a DMSFX that was a couple of inches long as it went down the stairs for example. Please work in at least two more “Klonk”s and a “Kloon” before the week is out.

    [All]

    Given the size of the mine that the orcs set off in the wall of Helms Deep, I would have expected some comic relief with everyone shouting at each other due to temporary deafness for at least a couple of scenes in the movie. The battle scenes badly needed the tension lifting in places.

    Steve.

    ps :o)

  19. Alia says:

    It’s all about the power curve. Right now in our D&D game, our Wizard feels useless, the Bard is completely support (I’ve been in combat twice), and the Rogues try to get in the most aventagist postion. The Fighter and Cleric usually wipe the floor with most encounters before the second round of combat (sometiems the third).

    In five or six levels (we just hit 3), the Fighters will be lucky to do anything to the creatures, while the Rogues and Wizard will be killing things before the fighter gets the chance. The Cleric will turn into a caster as well. The Bard will still be support ;-)

  20. Telas says:

    Amazing. I just made a post on another site about the “bazillion questions” player… the one who asks (in this case):

    “Is there a shield about?”
    (Sure.)
    “Can you describe it?”
    (It’s like the rest, kind of like a section of a cylinder, with spikes on the top.)
    “What would the Balance mod be for riding it down the stairs?”
    (Um, at least +20.) Thinking: There’s no way he can do this.
    “Cool, because with my synergies, ranks, and ability bonuses, I have a total modifier of +42. Can I still get shots off if I beat the DC by 10?”
    (…)

  21. Lizzle says:

    Glad someone else made the comment (and that Shamus let us make fun of it publicly) – – – this one came out of far left field in the movie and the first time I saw it, I was really, really, really afraid that we had an 18 minute pod racing scene coming up… we’d just seen some moving plot of our heroes band together, risking everything to defend mere villagers, take massive casualties… and Legolas surfed down the stairs… it SCREAMED a horrible mix between Leslie Nielsen in the Naked Gun movies and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (which, in context, are both fantastic) and was overall really disappointing… the stoic, proud elf catches some gnarly surf in a flurry of senseless bad graphics and poor writing… I figured they’d edit it out of the special editions.

  22. Salen says:

    Style points are worth extra XP, or they better be, because players don’t make balance check rolls for stuff like that while using the Shoot On The Run feat for nothing.

  23. MarkB says:

    Of course, the DM gets his own back as soon as the stunt’s over, when he gets to say to the archery-specialist, “And now you’re in melee combat. With 300 orcs.”

  24. pharniel says:

    …..or you could play Exalted or Scion or Reign or…well, any modern fantasy game where stunts are rewarded because it makes things more interesting for everyone else.
    anyway, As a current member of the RPGA LIVing grayhawk campign i can tell you with certanty that wizzards and othe rspellcasters after lvl 9 or so obliterate melee types constantly.
    becaulse lvl 9 is 5th level spells, and that’s where it’s all over for the fighter.
    also the roue is screwed, because everying will be undead, aboration or construct and thus immune to sneak attack damage.

  25. JohnW says:

    acrobatic stunts … points in “Tumble.” … “Fast Acrobatics” combined with “Acrobatic Charge”… Quickened Maximized Empowered Magic Missile … synergies, ranks, and ability bonuses … undead, aboration or construct …

    Are you guys making this stuff up or is this what the actual rules are like these days?

  26. sleepyfoo says:

    “Are you guys making this stuff up or is this what the actual rules are like these days?”

    To some extent yes.

    The Gneech “Rgr 5/Sco 6/ThfAcr 2” is ranger scout and theif-acrobat correct? their abilities play well off each other.

  27. Doug Brown says:

    Amazing cliffhanger, Shamus. I can’t believe there has been no rampant speculation over whether Legolas will be able to flip trick to manual in order to keep the combo going.

    Cheers for a good one!

    Doug

  28. Fickle says:

    *cracks up* It’s been so long since I’ve seen the movies that I totally forgot he did this, and his move caught me completely by surprise. XD Fantastic strip, Shamus!

  29. Javaboy says:

    Very nice! I can’t stop giggling.

  30. Getting_Fired says:

    Arrrgh this is the last one. I just read every episode at work, and wasted my whole day. I want more… MORE do you hear me? I am addicted!

  31. Doug Brown says:

    OK, since no one’s speckalatin’, here I go. I predict:

    360 Sal Flip to Orc Pop to Hardflip to Darkslide (along the side of the bridge). Get it? Darkslide? Moriquendi?

  32. Zalan says:

    aww yeah. I’ve been waiting for this one since I read the first strip a few months ago.

    Plain brilliant I say!

    heh… just finished a 2nd edition d&d session. I just love being a caster in that game…
    Fighter: I hit him with a sword!
    Me: Stoneskin.
    Fighter: Oh dear…
    Me: *insert random kill spell here*

  33. Susano says:

    Ahhh yes, when LOTR took a left turn into Feng Shui….

  34. Wolfheart says:

    “Even as a weakly godlike caster I could only do a fraction of the damage per round that the party's minmaxed cheddar-rogue could.”

    But they get to throw Fireballs =). Anyhow, what the casters really excell in D&D besides doing damage, is their diversity. Especially if you are a Sorcerer, you have a spell for about any situation. Keep lots of scrolls with you and ta-da! An unpassable cliff? Spider Climb! Lots of Kobolds? Fireball! A border guard? Invisibility Sphere! Need to spy on someone? Scrying! Need to scare someone half dead? Horror! Phantasmal Killer! There are zounds of options for those caster classes.

    And by the way, comic is great, again. I just love these and I fear the moment the Ring is destroyed and when there will be no more DM of the Rings =(

  35. Da Rogue says:

    Ah the skills of the one called Legolass. Her skills are starting to compare with mine halfling rogue.

    I recall the time he critted a land shark, at lvl 3!! The only thing showing of the shark was his fin!!
    Somehow we managed to get out of there without dieing…

  36. I nominate the following sound effects as text inserts for the Helm’s Deep Battle Sequence:

    “THATCH!” (Arrow into armour’s weak spot)
    “OOURCK!” (Uruk Hai painfully surprised by arrow in neck)
    “CLEAVE!” (Gimli’s axe, hitting anything)

    Thank you.

  37. Yahzi says:

    “Tony Hawk, thats hilarious.”

    I had no idea.

    Now I feel old.

    :(

    Curse you meddling kids!

  38. Scarlet Knight says:

    “Fighter: I hit him with a sword!
    Me: Stoneskin.
    Fighter: Oh dear…
    Me: *insert random kill spell here*”

    You forgot the second half of the sequence that always happens to MY mages:
    Fighter: I save half damage. I grab your skinny neck & insert sword up to hilt!
    ME: gurgle…cleric!

    1. WJS says:

      Who uses a fort or ref save spell on a fighter? Dominate person. 2e wasn’t the same of course, but you still had strong and weak saves, right?

  39. Stormfeather says:

    Did you ever have the impression that you played too many video games?

    I'm just sayin'…

    Blasphemer! There is no such thing as too many video games!

    Ahhh yes, when LOTR took a left turn into Feng Shui….

    *blinkblink*

    I think I missed the total Helm’s Deep decoration makeover scene.. .was that one of the deleted parts? o_O

    “No no, put the dead orc facing *north* or otherwise you’ll totally ruin the flow!”

  40. Vicky W says:

    My son had to explain to me what the reference was. I’m not much of a console gamer anymore (Last console game I played was on either a Sega Genesis or a Super Nintendo when said offspring was in diapers) I do remember thinking at the time in the movies “Wow, that looks a lot more like a Feng Shui move than anything else.”

    I’m still trying to get together a Feng Shui campaign. No one can stay focused long enough to stop giggling to play.

  41. Skwyd says:

    Classic movie-to-video-game reference!!!!

    I’d like to add a comment to those that are complaining about the uber-rogues, and uber-mages, and…well uber-anything in D&D. Virtually every class I’ve seen in 3rd edition has a possibility to be grossly over-powered. It is all in how the player builds the character. I’ve seen clerics that become a “one-man-army”, rogues that have the highest AC in the group and don’t wear ANY armour, casters that can’t be killed, and fighters that crit on a 6 or higher on the d20. All of these characters a cool in their own way, but really they aren’t any fun for anyone except the one playing them. I’ve found that as a DM, it is my job to keep my players from building these grossly unbalanced characters so that everyone can have fun. If they just want to build a PC “with the most plusses” then I really don’t care to have them at my table…

    >:)

  42. Nogard_Codesmith says:

    HAH! Ok thats a riot… especially since my kid is bugging me to play Tony Hawk with him right now.

  43. Michael says:

    Tony Hawk The Slayer!

  44. sexyskank says:

    if i remember right, the DMG has a portion which comments on that. Every person at the table will want to get his/her “kick” in a different way. Some get it from rp, some from being evil, some from being power gamers, and the list goes on. The trick to being a good DM is to accommodate them all without leaving anyone feeling crummy. Which is why, of course, the DM’s job is insanely difficult.

  45. Nick_Soapdish says:

    Hilarious comic aside; My players must make the worst casters alive. Outside of lobbing fireballs into crowds, they get their spells resisted all day long by the big stuff, and that leaves the work to the guy with a big sword and 50 feats to pump his damage into the silly range.

  46. b9anders says:

    Brilliant strip. :-D

    Someone should have sketched this for Jackson in production to make it plain what kind of scene that was.

    The silly thing is that you could probably replicate that with D&D with the right feats and skills.

    What is it people like to say: GURPS is a simulator. D&D is more like a gaming console.

  47. Menthalion says:

    [email protected] Hawk the Slayer ..
    I thought I was the only one remembering that movie.. If you haven’t seen it before: a brilliant synopsis and some clips of the most awe-inspiring special effects the eighties could bring can be found at http://www.badmovies.org/movies/hawkslayer/

  48. Matt` says:

    Oh man, this is nerdy on so many levels – LOTR + D&D + Video games
    Awesome

  49. Medium Dave says:

    WORST part of the series, ever. Skateboarding elf shooting arrows. I hated that. All we needed next was some wire-fu as Aragorn laid down some l33t Numenorean Dragon Style on a dozen Uruks. Ack. This needed mocking in a huge fashion. Hated this with a thousand hates. Thanks for pilloring it. Do it again.

    Also, when the crew get into Osgiliath, have someone say “This wan’t in the book! Why are HOBBITS in Osgiliath?” Made no sense at all. But I am not bitter, no not at all.

  50. Dinkleberg says:

    I thought you were going for God of War for a second there. This one works just as well, though :)

  51. Aaron says:

    “Of course, the DM gets his own back as soon as the stunt's over, when he gets to say to the archery-specialist, “And now you're in melee combat. With 300 orcs.”

    I do something akin to this every chance I get with my players. You think they’d learn after the first 20 times … but nooooo. Great strip Shamus!

  52. Tola says:

    295, actually-the shield went shooting off into the crowd when he jumped off. Which I think was the point, if I remember the scene right-he was trying to get to…Gimli? I think it was….but there was too much of a crush.

  53. Browncoat says:

    36 damien walder Says:

    April 9th, 2007 at 8:43 pm
    I nominate the following sound effects as text inserts for the Helm's Deep Battle Sequence:

    “THATCH!” (Arrow into armour's weak spot)
    “OOURCK!” (Uruk Hai painfully surprised by arrow in neck)
    “CLEAVE!” (Gimli's axe, hitting anything)

    Thank you.

    Yes. Let’s have the guy that directed the Batman TV series do the Helm’s Deep Battle. Come to think of it, Aragorn tossing Gimli is a little reminiscient of Batman swinging Robin into a group of bad guys who all fall down.

    Aragorn: We must give them time to secure the gate, old chum!
    Gimli: Holy Gorge of Eternal Peril, Strider! I’ll never be able to make that jump.
    Aragorn: Never fear, I’ve got an extra pair of Strider-Shoes in my utility belt. Wear them!
    Gimli: Great Corns and Blisters, I’ll never fit into those, you’ll have to toss me!

    And then the battle is joined with the THWACK! and the CLEAVE! and the “OY! MY GLAVIN! It hu-urts. . .”

  54. Tola says:

    That…I suddenly have the title sequence for that running through my head, with appropritate adjustments(Leg, Aragorn, Gimli running in, and the ‘Crowd’ is Uruk-Hai. I guess horses can sub for the Bat-Mobile.)

  55. Erin Storts says:

    Most. Brilliant. Strip. Ever.

    I loved this scene in the movie, but mostly because I imagined rp’ing it!

  56. superfluousk says:

    Ha ha, I love it. Not that Shamus can’t do satire wonders with just screen-chopping and text bubbles, but sometimes a turn into the meta is brilliant as well.

  57. Wraithshadow says:

    Especially if you are a Sorcerer, you have a spell for about any situation.

    No, if you’re a Sorcerer, you have one spell for all situations. Or close enough to it.

    I had no idea.

    Now I feel old.

    Hah- you feel old. I just read a forum where some kid’s talking about ‘classic’ games, and they’re all things that came out in the last five years. Here I’m expecting to listen to glory days about Moon Patrol or the old QBasic classic Gorillas, and instead he’s talking about how he just played Halo.

  58. Scarlet Knight says:

    Shamus, I salute you! I’m getting strange looks at work twice as much now. First , when I laugh aloud when the strip appears, then again when I laugh the next day reading the comments! “Holy Gorge of Eternal Peril, Strider! ” Ow! My sides hurt!

  59. Flexstyle says:

    See, you’ve just put two unexpected-yet-brilliant jokes into the series in the span of just a few days! I’m remembering how the movie went as I read these (haven’t watched ’em in a while) and I’m amazed by how well this whole thing works. Kudos!

  60. Long time fan, first time poster says:

    Making fun of the worst scene in that movie… classic :)

    Seriously, had the rest of the movie not been so kick ass, that would have forced me to get up and leave… I mean what kind of stuff was that screenwriter/director smoking when they thought, “Hey, lets make Legolas skate down the stairs on a shield while still firing a bow and THEN have the shield fly up and miraculously stab an orc in the neck despite having an iron neck-guard”

  61. Long time fan, first time poster says:

    Erm… just wanted to add something…

    I wish he does a “no arrows left” kind of scene at some point, in the book, half of the mid-battle dialogs between the characters featured Legolas saying he needed to return for more arrows … what does pretty boy Orlando Bloom do instead? He gets to stab orcs in the eye with arrows, pull them out and then fire them, constantly firing with his bow, never losing all of his arrows even though he seems to only have five or so in his quiver. I mean Aragorn has to bunch, kick and headbutt his way out of orc grapples, stab them desperately with his dagger, Gimli gets knocked over and surrounded constantly, but does our little pretty boy ever once have to really go toe-to-toe with orcs? Granted, he has used his daggers briefly in some scenes… briefly… very briefly… but never once do i seem him in a serious struggle against enemies, its only a few kung-fu like whirling blades and the next scene he’s back to the bow. Have we ever seen him even once have to full on resort to melee? Nope… he’s got infinite arrows…
    Hax… -.-

  62. Wraithshadow says:

    2nd Edition elf. Those got everything. :P

  63. Steve says:

    Wolfheart Says:

    But they get to throw Fireballs =). Anyhow, what the casters really excell in D&D besides doing damage, is their diversity. Especially if you are a Sorcerer, you have a spell for about any situation. Keep lots of scrolls with you and ta-da! An unpassable cliff? Spider Climb! Lots of Kobolds? Fireball! A border guard? Invisibility Sphere! Need to spy on someone? Scrying! Need to scare someone half dead? Horror! Phantasmal Killer! There are zounds of options for those caster classes.

    Well, not to get too seriously twonkish but yer average minmaxed Roguefort can passle out damage at about the same rate as the average fireball can (unmaxed) what with multiple attacks and those super cheap bargain-price magic daggers, rapiers and whatever else they always seem to have.

    And even a Sorcerer with a charisma of 20 – WHAT? Everyone else was cheesing-up like mad and I had “Unlimited Wish” and no desire to use XPs for going above level 20. Plus each wish I took instead of levelling up pissed off Mr Rogue. What was the question?

    Oh yeah, even a CHA 20 CL 20 sorcerer only gets to fireball 7 times a day unless he has Maximise Spell and Empower Spell. Amazing how many creatures are immune to fire damage at those sorts of challenge ratings though. He does get 46 spells (out of a list of well over a hundred), but the vast majority of them are low level.

    To be honest, the maximised, empowered Magic Missile was often the best bet, but even at CHA 20 and caster level 20 you get six of them per day (they are spell level 5 attacks). Hardly a gattling gun of death when your average foe was something with 300+ hp, magic resistance, 10 foot reach and a breath weapon. Not only that, our DM grew fond of things with a “Save or Die” attack, something the sorcerer cannot mount a defence against (without cross classing or a Wond’rous Item like a phylactery of life essence storing).

    I liked having a Moment of Prescience, Quickened True Strike and Disintegrate combined attack, but it only did max damage once out of all the times I threw it. By the time you really need that attack, the monsters can save against it without breaking a sweat. Nothing beats buring up three high level slots for a 5D6 attack.

    I enjoyed playing the sorcerer of the party, but he died a lot.

    Steve.

    1. Moridin says:

      What did you need all the +attack spells for? Disintegrate like almost all the other spells targets touch-AC, which almost never goes much above 15.

  64. NinjaDebugger says:

    So, wait, wait. You burned +40 to your attack roll, in two spell slots, on a touch attack (which is difficult to miss with), with a spell that is virtually worthless against any enemy with a Con score? And you did this multiple times?

    I would say no offense, but it would be a lie, you were a really terrible Sorc player, and it’s no wonder your rogue out-damaged you regularly.

  65. Segev says:

    I fear, Steve, that you are, in fact, just doing it wrong. A sorcerer has options other than “fireball” and “disintegrate”. The party’s fighting a red dragon that has (surprise, surprise) a high Fort save? Don’t use fireball or disintegrate on it (and heavens, do not burn a true strike or MOMENT OF PRESCIENCE on hitting it with a touch attack; save that Moment for your save v. his breath weapon…or better, cast Superior Fire Resistance – out of a wand, if necessary). Whip out a Cone of Cold. Level 5 spell, does a cone of damage that, at sorc level 20, deals 15d6 cold damage. There. Your monster’s not immune to that, and the example here of a red dragon takes EXTRA damage from cold. Oh, and I laugh if you say the dragon’s making the reflex save for half. Even with your rather low Cha of 20 (for a 20th level cha-based spellcaster), that’s a DC 20 reflex save. …okay, no, I suppose it -can- make that, given that you have such a bad cha.

    You should have a +6 cloak of charisma by now, and DEFINITELY look into getting yourself a +4 or +5 tome of leadership and influence. Or burning the 20-25k exp on 4-5 Wishes to get another 4-5 cha. Though really, your goal is to wind up with an evil Cha score. Things make saves because your character is a weak sorcerer.

    When hitting things with touch spells, remember that you probably don’t need true strike or any other help, unless they’re fast and dodgey. Don’t use fort-for-practically-nothing spells against big bad scary monsters that obviously have good fort saves. And have a spell for every energy type…or energy substitution.

    A competently played sorcerer outshines a rogue 90% of the time. Especially since there are more things immune to sneak attack than to energy damage. The guys here: http://boards1.wizards.com/forumdisplay.php?f=339 will tell you that a wizard is even better, but I’d stick to mastering the sorc, first. Be polite and ask them for help, and I’m sure they would be happy to show you why, exactly, casters beat rogues every time.

  66. Baxil says:

    Looks like your Legolas earned a much higher score than my Legolas did. Damn that Tony Hawk and his score inflation!

    Love the comic, btw. Great minds must think alike. :)

  67. Foos! says:

    Steve said:
    Oh yeah, even a CHA 20 CL 20 sorcerer only gets to fireball 7 times a day unless he has Maximise Spell and Empower Spell.

    Actually, a 20 Cha gives a bonus spell for levels 1-5 (2 for 1st). A CL 20 sorcerer has 6 spells/day for all spell levels. Without using any Metamagic feats, they could always sacrifice a higher level spell slot to recast a spell. That gives 7 fireballs for the level 3-5 range and 6 fireballs for the level 6-9 range for a total of 45 20d6 fireballs per day.

    Even the maximised, empowered Magic Missile could be cast 31 times per day by using slots higher than lvl 5.

    Gods! am I falling into the gamer geek trap here, I’ll hush now.

  68. Ikkle says:

    Laughed out loud at that one. Brilliant comic, great jokes and so well executed.

  69. Weaselcreature says:

    Well, I wasn’t going to put my 1st comment until I had caught up and read them all, but…
    I’m at work, reading these in between patients and I think I should have stopped before I got to this one. Because I hated this so SO much, and you did SUCH a great job with it, and adding the Tony Hawk bit at the end, I had to force myself not to laugh out loud too much, which caused my eyes to water and I had to go out and get my next patient! HAHAHA!
    These have ALL been great though. Thanks for the hard work!

  70. Rezdave says:

    Sweet. I loved FotR but TT got sketchy and the series fell apart with the “snowboarding elf”. Glad to see I’m not alone in my loathing of this scene. Can’t wait to see how you handle dwarf tossing (momentarily, since I’m in the archives).

  71. sybill says:

    When i saw that scene in the movie i had turned to my BF at the time and said “Who does he think he is? I played an elf all my gaming life and i never had that kind of ability “…let me look that up… aghh yes, shield boarding level 5 required” ”

    it’s so funny to see someone else play a joke on it too

  72. EezaK says:

    tha was perfect man

  73. Thandruin says:

    Figure the rest will be something like:
    … SHOOT THE ORC x3 + BOARDKILL + 360 FACE STAB
    But then she loses the board (into an Uruk-chest) along with all of the combo points :(

  74. Chris says:

    on the note of letting things slide i would jsut like to say (and for you rules nazis I know that there are probly several rules prohibiting this but it was too much fun) we once had a gnome bard get mounted combat bonuses riding on the half orc barbarian.

  75. Turgid Bolk says:

    [quote]”OOURCK!” (Uruk Hai painfully surprised by arrow in neck)[/quote]

    Uruk-hai don’t feel pain. Like in the first movie, remember when Aragorn cut off the archer’s arm, then stuck him in the gut? The Uruk-hai grabbed the sword and pulled it into himself, snarling in Aragorn’s face all the while. Not cause he was brave or anything, he just doesn’t feel pain. This probably leads to a lot of missing appendages for the Uruk-hai, since they were basically bred to be lepers. Yes, I’m a geek.

    But not so much as you people, geez, just look at these comments! Great comic Shamus.

  76. Benny says:

    Oooh! Thank you! This was by far the worst moment in all three films. You have done it justice.

  77. Guenhwyvar says:

    “OK, since no one's speckalatin', here I go. I predict:

    360 Sal Flip to Orc Pop to Hardflip to Darkslide (along the side of the bridge). Get it? Darkslide? Moriquendi?”

    *groan* ba-dum-bam-tch!

  78. DavidRS says:

    Can’t believe no-one’s mentioned the obvious pun…

    Tony Orc!

    “Shoot the Orc”: brilliant idea for a gap!

  79. Toil3T says:

    Awesome. And stabbing an orc with the shield should be part of the combo.
    Now I wanna dig up my PSX and play Tony Hawk: Pro Skater 2

  80. Cynder says:

    Now, THAT’S what it means to take EXTREME to a new level!

    What makes this one funnier is that when you hold you mouse over one of the panels, is says, “Legolass, exteme elf!”!

    And yes, it is spelt LegolASS. Just thought I’d like to point that out ;)

  81. 1st time post says:

    OMG! I was drinking at the time and snorted water out my nose!
    Home run with this strip! Good lord…

  82. Him says:

    Will one more hurt, though, for sure?

  83. d'Antarel says:

    If I have a player in my campaign that thinks of something epic like that, I let them try it. I just set the DC for whatever appropriate check relatively advanced, then I give them a bunch of penalties. It’s mean, I know, but when they’re at a HIGHER level, then yeah, they can pull shit like that all the time.

  84. Aragorn says:

    LOL…. this is TOO MUCH!!! :D

  85. ERROR says:

    Xargon…

    That would be “Shot on the Run,” since only his (Or her, heh) feet is on shield, unlike when riding on a horse.

    Just my thoughts.

  86. Maladjester says:

    Don’t attempt stunts like this.

    A buddy of mine once had his street sam leap off a third-story roof with the intention of firing his pistol in midair, down through the roof of a convertible driving away below him, killing the driver and the man riding shotgun, then punching through the leather drop-top himself, landing in the padded back seat, and escaping all injury. Needless to say, the sam awoke in the hospital with a tube up his nose and no clear idea where he had gone wrong. Side note: the character’s street handle was Fallen (yes, named before the incident).

  87. Billy says:

    I nearly died laughing.

  88. Rachel says:

    In my DnD group, everyone usually wants to be either a fighter or a sorcerer. So they all turn to me and say, “will you be our cleric? No one else wants to.” Fortunately for them, I love being a cleric. My characters end up usually being clerics with intense longbow skills. So I never die and can hold my own without a tank. And when the gung-ho gang charges in without any sort of plan and begins to die, well, I just wonder who’s in charge.

    Our tank: “Rachel, Rachel I’m dying! I’ll give you this magic scroll if you heal me!”

    Me: “Kthnxbye.”

    This ends up happening A LOT. Remember; in the end, when everyone is dying, the one who gets deals and offers for treasure and loot (and in one case, I got a person to swear fealty to my character for in-game time of three years if I healed them; they had also left our whole group to die in a pit of oil with a torch coming down from the ceiling, so I thought it was fair) is always the cleric. Clerics pwn. They may not be showy or flashy or explodey, but they sure do have some influence once someone has -2 HP.

  89. Thomas says:

    The only question is, can he add a 900 coming off the stairs?

  90. Math_Mage says:

    –Our tank: “Rachel, Rachel I'm dying! I'll give you this magic scroll if you heal me!”

    Me: “Kthnxbye.”–

    That’s…kind of a dick move. Frankly, I’m surprised the party never kicked your character out for that. Were you in the habit of playing Evil clerics?

  91. Grom says:

    I really don’t know why so many folk thought this was the worst scene in the three films. I thought it was great. And truly I just know that this is just the trick someone in my old D&D group would have tried to pull off. And that was back in the early days before all the skills and feats and stuff like that there. This and the Dwarf toss, made the 2nd movie for me.

  92. joesolo says:

    thats just epic.

  93. Spatticus says:

    What makes me feel old is that since Tony Hawk games aren’t big any more, in a few years a young kid could read this comic and not get the joke at all.

  94. by_the_sword says:

    Note, this was probably the inspiration for D&D 4th edition.

  95. Kunou says:

    I played with a party for which the lowest average damage per turn at level 13 was 168. I stopped giving them combat encounters they could win at all almost immediately afterwards. They seemed to get angry that they ended up fighting the D&D equivalent of Amazo’s Android. That was fun.

  96. Hattington says:

    Every time I see this scene, I think of this strip. :D

  97. Bagheera says:

    It makes me wonder if D&D campaigns are really like this and I should find a group. Great, Shamus has turned me into a geek (well, a geekier geek).

  98. Charles K. Ballard says:

    Filk sensation “The Great Luke-ski” has a song that mentions this scene. I can’t recall the exact beginning of the phrase, but it goes something like, “Now Legolas is cruisng such an excellent (smelter?), like if Tony Hawk was starring in “The Legend of Zelda”. Do a search, you can find his web-site and maybe the song. He’s so prolific I can’t begin to tell you which it was. CKB…..

  99. nocata says:

    does legolas really slide down on a orc shield in the movie? LOL!!!!!

  100. Heisenberg says:

    I just wanted to see if the message would change.

  101. Heisenberg says:

    Gah! Guess not.

  102. TooMad says:

    Six and a half years later and you’ve still changed the way I view this scene. Damn you.

    1. TooMad says:

      Nine now, if I watch the movie I have to pop on by this page.

  103. Andy says:

    Those are some high-ass scoring gaps, considering the THPS scoring system.

    If they put Legolas in the game, I’d slay it on Multiplayer. Literally.

    (for maximum effect, listen to “Superman” by Goldfinger while looking at the large end frame)

  104. Graham Garrett says:

    Just discovered this webcomic today and already dying. I guess it really does stand the test of time! :) Additionally, I’m listening to Hooked on a Feeling while I read this (on a loop) and it’s making me combine it with thoughts on GotG…hijinks have ensued.

    And yes, the Leggy-lass and Aragorn thing gets top billing in this “crossover”.

  105. Joe says:

    I wonder if this was the inspiration for Geralt’s downhill antics in Witcher 3.

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