Guild Wars 2: Dungeon Crawl

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Oct 17, 2012

Filed under: Game Reviews 326 comments

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A while back I talked about how infuriatingly stupid the faction heroes are in Guild Wars 2. I was referring to the story missions, but looking back I realize their really offensive behavior isn’t in the personal quest line, it’s in the dungeons. Their erratic and obnoxious behavior is a side-effect of an overarching problem that plagues Guild Wars 2, which is that the dungeons are awful.

The conventional wisdom is that the dungeons are “too hard”. I hate to say that without qualifiers, because the game is in such an extreme state of flux. Three weeks ago the Ascalonian Catacombs were brutally unfair and senselessly hard. Then I played through it again a couple of nights ago and it had been changed and it was basically tolerable now.

On October 5th, 2012 I got together with this party:

Some of us are naked because our armor has broken from repeated deaths. There’s a cap on how much repairs can cost, so it’s more economical to wait until you’ve got multiple damaged items before fixing them.
Some of us are naked because our armor has broken from repeated deaths. There’s a cap on how much repairs can cost, so it’s more economical to wait until you’ve got multiple damaged items before fixing them.

We had an enjoyably miserable time running face-first into the wall-shaped difficulty spikes, and as part of this bonding experience we all agreed that we should write about it. Here was our group, from left to right:

Jarenth – Level 69 Charr Engineer
Hoffenbachager – Level 80 Norn Mesmer
Myself – Level 80 Human Warrior
JPH – Level 80 Asura Warrior
Krellen – Charr Engineer, later swapped for level 42 Norn Guardian (pictured)

Click on them to read their thoughts on why the dungeon system is broken. Everyone has a slightly different take on it, and they all make for an interesting read. They do a pretty good job of outlining why the dungeon was broken, stupid and unfair, and why most of us aren’t wearing pants, so I’m not going to go over all of that again.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Guild Wars 2: Dungeon Crawl”

 


 

What Women Want – The Mary Sue

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Oct 16, 2012

Filed under: Video Games 291 comments

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You might remember a couple of weeks ago I wrote the column Tropes vs. Women Protagonists. This led to a lot of interesting discussions. It’s a fractally huge subject that creeps into gender politics, marketing, game funding, game design, writing, and platform / market demographics. You could write about this for months and still wind up with uncharted areas of discussion. With this in mind, I posed a few questions at the end of my column, asking, basically, what women wanted.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “What Women Want – The Mary Sue”

 


 

Mass Effect EP9: I Think We’re Going to Need More Bugspray

By Shamus Posted Monday Oct 15, 2012

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 93 comments


Link (YouTube)

Our re-posting project from 2010 continues. Here is the episode of infamy, where we decided to leave Kaiden on Virmire instead of Ashley, as originally planned. It’s true that his death was repealed for our Mass Effect 2 play-through, but it was re-instated for Mass Effect 3.

Looking back, I can’t help but think he was the lucky one.

EDIT: No, Kaiden is alive in our ME3 play-through. I forgot. I was confusing our Spoiler Warning run with my own play-through.

 


 

Whinge and Whine

By Shamus Posted Sunday Oct 14, 2012

Filed under: Personal 81 comments

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On the upside, I lived, and will be able to continue to write on my blog. The downside is that I was incredibly sick and mere survival seems like a piss poor trade. I mean, I got my life. Big deal. I had that before I got sick.

That’s the thing with illnesses. There’s no justice. If you get bit by a wolf, you can get better and hunt down that son of a bitch. But you can’t go out and even the score with a pathogen. Well, technically I killed it in the process of getting better, but its progeny will live on, mutate, and infect other human beings. In fact, someday those twisted offspring will be back, and I’ll have to put them down again. Assuming I’m up for it.

I was the last person in the house to get sick, so I saw this coming a week ago. I saw the others get picked off, but there’s nothing you can do but wait for your turn. When I finally got sick, everyone else had pretty much recovered. I went around the house mocking myself saying, “I am suffering in a painfully unique way and nobody else understands what I’m going though!”

This particular illness is ridiculous. It’s some sort of multiple-personality disease that draws symptoms at random. It starts off with fever and intense headache. Six hours later those symptoms are gone, replaced by aching joints and stomach cramps. The next morning it’s a thundering heartbeat and extreme drymouth. Dizziness and congestion! A dry cough and a neck ache! What is this? Some kind of Whitman’s Sampler of esoteric symptoms?

The most interesting was the interval on Saturday where the only symptom was that my face hurt. Not my sinuses, my eyes, or mucus membranes. I’m talking about teeth, cheekbones, lower jaw, and nose. It literally felt like I’d been beaten and I was just waiting for the bruises to appear. I’ve never even heard of a sickness doing that. I’ve somehow caught a bug that can punch you in the face. Our science isn’t ready for this!

So that’s what I did on my weekend.

You might want to go wash your hands when you leave this site.

 


 

Mass Effect 3 EP22: Relationships are Complicated

By Josh Posted Saturday Oct 13, 2012

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 179 comments


Link (YouTube)

Brought to you one day late by Shamus fighting off hordes of influenza ninjas. Or maybe he’s just playing XCOM.

 


 

Mass Effect 3 EP21: Boobotics?

By Shamus Posted Thursday Oct 11, 2012

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 160 comments


Link (YouTube)

Look, I’m feeling really sick, I’m in a bad mood, and I’m right in the middle of an X-Com game. I’m in no shape to give you additional commentary. Just watch the show and don’t ask too much of me.

 


 

Mass Effect 3 EP20: Unfair Nitpicking

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Oct 10, 2012

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 298 comments


Link (YouTube)

So Udina somehow contacted Cerberus to enact a plan that made no sense and could never work, even if Cerberus hadn’t stabbed him in the back, which he totally should have seen coming. Then Cerberus overcomes the Citadel defenses, gains control of the entire complex, and manages to do so in such a way that doesn’t leave any incriminating personnel or supply ships hovering around the place. You have a running battle then a car chase takes you to some other random location, and yet no matter where you go the place is filled with Cerberus mooks.

And then Kai Leng.

A good writer – like in Spec Ops – will make you feel like you were outsmarted, fooled, or out-maneuvered by your adversaries. A terrible writer will have his pet bad guy outsmart you by forcing you to be stupid. He’ll overpower you by taking away your powers and making you incompetent in a cutscene. The writers wanted to make Leng some sort of super-adversary, and their first plan was to bend the world and game mechanics to make him fit. Kai Leng has no personality, no world view, no history, no buildup, no connection to the setting, and no visible reason to oppose Shepard. What are the stakes for him? Why does he care? Why does he hate(?) Shepard so much? None of these things are established, because Kai Leng is an antagonist for the player, not for Shepard.

Yes, I know: “Indoctrinated”, the magical get-out-of-characterization-free card. Kai Leng is indoctrinated to some unspecified degree. Compare this to how Saren was portrayed. He was a complicated guy. I might pick at his plan, and not everything he did made perfect sense, but darned if we didn’t get a sense of who he was, what he wanted to accomplish, and why. Saren’s indoctrination was a tragic failing, a fall by a Turian who had more hubris than ability. Kail Leng’s indoctrination is a half-assed hand-wave offered to rebuff people like me who go around insisting characters need things like personality and motivation.

These are the things that BioWare fans love BioWare for: Characterization and world-building. Failing on these points is like a Mario game getting the platforming wrong.

The worst of all possible worlds is to combine BioWare style mechanics with Capcom style storytelling. At least in those games I’m not required to participate in the reason-destroying cutscenes. I can just go slack-jawed and wait for the stupidity to end so I can go back to the shooting.