DM of the Rings Remaster XXI: The Epic Sounds of Battle

By Bay Posted Sunday May 28, 2023

Filed under: DM of the Rings Remaster 21 comments

This happens all the time. No matter how epic the battle, once begun, the thing sounds more or less like a bingo game: People shout out numbers and other people get excited about them.

–  Shamus, Wednesday Oct 25, 2006

Edit: This comic used to contain the slur for people with mental disabilities. The pre-remastered version is still linked above, and the version of the remaster containing said slur is available here for those emotionally invested in the comic remaining entirely the same. The original word was a sad product of it’s time and I don’t feel the need to inflict it on old or new readers.

Oof, that hasn’t aged great. I wasn’t sure if we should pull the use of the R word there, but considering we’ve been leaving in OG typos trying to keep true to the original, it stayed, for now. Unfortunately, it does sound exactly like the kind of table this is, but luckily has become less and less the norm over the years.

On the flip side, fictional slurs! Anyone else’s table end up coming up with offensive things pretend races and peoples get called? Or…is that just us?

In our defense, it’s really fun to totally snipe an imaginary racist.


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21 thoughts on “DM of the Rings Remaster XXI: The Epic Sounds of Battle

  1. Sleeping Dragon says:

    Not seeing the new page boss. (Which made me check the original page and yeah, my memories have really upscaled it)

    1. Bay says:

      Ha! Caught it early!

      Yay insomnia. And, for once, not entirely my fault, the link for the image host had a lowercase and my link was properly capitalized, and for some reason that crap is case sensitive in the directory. I guess just in case I need to upload Page_21 AND page_21. I can’t imagine a circumstance where that would be necessary, but I just had to google what lowercase letters were called, so I’m not exactly the pinnacle of intelligence at the moment.

      Edit: I do know what lowercase letters are called when my brain is working. I’m suffering from sleep deprivation. Please do not take that as my baseline brain function. Please.

      1. M says:

        Unix/Linux can be a pain sometimes, what with capitalization counting in filenames. Yes, you can have “Page_21”, “PAGE_21” and “page_21” files in the same directory on a Unix server and they’re all different files. I suppose this is so that name comparison could use less code and work faster in the days when every bit made a noticeable difference.

        There’s a good chance the host is working with some flavor of Unix/Linux.

        1. Philadelphus says:

          From an alternate point of view, Windows’ being case insensitive and not respecting capitalization of filenames can also be a real pain sometimes.

  2. Tuck says:

    I had to take a moment to re-read it because when you first mentioned the ‘R word’ I thought you were referring to the misuse of “rendering” in the first panel (it should be “rending”, as in the original, but I hope Shamus would be amused by this typo given his love of 3D graphics).

    1. Noumenon72 says:

      Me too! I am more sensitive to misused words than taboo words I guess.

  3. MrGuy says:

    I don’t love the term used. But I gotta say, when an ORC is questioning your intelligence, you should maybe take a close look at your life.

  4. Abnaxis says:

    Eh, I for one found the use of the ‘R’ word somewhat shocking at the time, though even then I chalked it up as something that would probably be bandied around the fictional table with this group, what with the really disturbing come-ons between Aragorn and Legolas.

    I came to the comic a good bit after this original aired though, although I don’t think it was that long after (they were in Rohan when I joined)

  5. djw says:

    Was excited to see that the System Shock remake is out now. Its tragic that they didn’t release it a year ago :(

    Any chance you guys are going to play it and then (maybe) write about it? I get that its maybe not in your wheelhouse, but it might be fun as a one shot?

    1. Storm says:

      Hah, was wondering if I was the only one who thought about that as soon as I saw the news. A real shame it didn’t come out that much sooner

      I’d certainly be interested to see Bay’s take on it, but yeah, I have no idea if they’d be into it at all

    2. Lino says:

      I already replied to your comment in the other thread, but I realised only the people with RSS would read it :D

      But yeah, just wanted to say that what I’m really sad about is that he never got to see ChatGPT or Shadows of Doubt. Him and Paul would have had a field day on the Diecast talking about those two!

      But yes, I would also have loved to hear his thoughts of System Shock :/

  6. Philadelphus says:

    I’ve got into reading Brandon Sanderson last year, and I think in every series he makes up some fictional curse word for the setting. For someone who doesn’t swear IRL, it’s really storming fun!

  7. Abnaxis says:

    Does anyone else besides me feel really silly saying you “almost” rolled a 20? Like, unless it’s an unfair die, that 19 is just as probable as a roll of 20 or of 3.

    This doesn’t stop me from saying it, of course, it just makes me feel like a tool when I do and makes me cringe when others say it.

    1. Lino says:

      I also think about this stuff sometimes (although in my case it’s board games and most often it’s about rolling d6’s). But I guess I’m a bit dumber than you, because I also get a real kick out of rolling a 6 if I had rolled a 5 on the previous turn. Even though rolling that 6 was just as likely as rolling any other number on that particular roll…

      It just goes to show how weird brains are :D

      1. MrGuy says:

        Humans are born storytellers. We want to explain things, put them in a narrative arc, imbue them with meaning. It’s as true on a DnD table as it is watching sportscasters talk about “storylines” for grown adults playing a game. Or gamblers being convinced of a “hot” table or a “lucky” shooter.

        In the specific context of DnD, the dice rolling is integral to the events of the story, and so it’s part of the narrative. In the “real world” a die came up 3. In the game, the normally deadeye archer missed a well-aimed shot at the big baddie who killed her brother. Why? The emotion of the moment must have been too much for her. Or she wanted to kill him face to face. Or a quick death was too good for him. Or she just wasn’t equal to the task, and it’s a tragic story.

        There’s a story, because there has to be a story. The dice just choose what story that is.

        Silly? Sure, in its way. But it’s also fundamental to what makes table top fun. The dice tell us what happened, and we get to explain it.

  8. skulgun says:

    > On the flip side, fictional slurs! Anyone else’s table end up coming up with offensive things pretend races and peoples get called? Or…is that just us?

    Is that from this comic? I don’t see any. Unless you mean ‘goblin’ for ‘orc’.

  9. Mythos says:

    No, no, you’re not alone. I had my dwarf character call someone a “beardless rock-eater”, meaning they lost their honor and right to wear a beard and are foolish enough to eat a rock. In her defense, they tried to eat her pet rat. The rat is fine and is named Loaf!

  10. Bay, it seems you did a great job with comics, because I can’t stop refreshing the page in the urge to check the new one!

    Thank you very much for this, makes me feel nostalgic of the 20+ years back when I played AD&D.

  11. Nixorbo says:

    On the flip side, fictional slurs! Anyone else’s table end up coming up with offensive things pretend races and peoples get called? Or…is that just us?

    “Halfling” always felt to me like it should be an in-universe slur.

    1. Chad Miller says:

      Shadowrun has the highly similar “halfer” for dwarves, and it absolutely is a slur in that setting.

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