#31 Bringing Home the Bacon

By Shamus Posted Friday Jun 14, 2019

Filed under: DM of the Rings 27 comments

Original Commentary:

A little behind-the-scenes stuff on this strip:

Of course, Casey wouldn’t put something like a “used livestock” lot into his world. He simply presented the players with a vague NPC who sold them what they needed. He wasn’t planning on this course of events, so the place is light on details. The players fill the descriptive void with their imaginations and their kidding around, and that reality creeps into the strip.

This was one of those cases where I really missed the ability to just spend a dozen panels on something. I had all sorts of little quasi-jokes I wanted to pack in here. The idea of a “used car lot” for livestock made me laugh, and I wanted to really explore the idea. However, it wouldn’t have been good storytelling to stretch this encounter out for three strips, and I don’t think the smaller jokes would carry a strip themselves.

I imagined the animals would have numbers painted onto their sides, the same way car lots put the price in neon across the front window. I imagined a bunch of banter from the players describing the place while Casey droned on and they ignored him.

I pictured signs hung on the animals:

“A fortnight, same as cash!”

“All-leather exterior!”

“Delicious and hard working!”

Shamus Says:

I have nothing to add to the commentary above. If I did, it would be way too meta-meta.

Shawn Says:

Man, “All Leather Exterior” still cracks me up. I don’t remember if that was in the original script or not, but that totally should have gone in to the comic.


From The Archives:

27 thoughts on “#31 Bringing Home the Bacon

  1. Karma The Alligator says:

    Funny that when I saw the “Used Livestock” sign, while I did think of used cars, I also thought of what lonely farmers might get up to with some animals…

    “All-leather exterior!” really is good.

    1. BlueHorus says:

      That was exactly my though when I saw the sign for ‘used livestock’. It’s just missing the letters ‘ab’ from the front…
      Don’t buy those pigs – they’re probably traumatised!

      And I’ll second the comment on the ‘All-Leather Exterior!’
      It’s a great joke, partly because it begs the question: what’s the alternative?!

    2. Lino says:

      THANK YOU for sharing that! I thought I was the only one twisted enough to make that connection :D

  2. I’m confused.

    Does the used livestock salesperson have tape over their mouth, or is that supposed to be a really large smile?

    1. Shamus says:

      Large smile. It’s a quirk of Shawn’s style. You can also see it way back in strip #10.

      1. Redrock says:

        That’s a bummer. Between the possibility that it could be tape, the cow’s somber expression and the exaggerated thumbs up one could imagine a very intriguing Animal Farm/System of Doctor Tarr and Professor Fether scenario going on in that panel. Like maybe the cow is selling off the pigs because the cows are racist against pigs, or maybe those were counter-revolutionary pigs. Or maybe it’s part of their collective master plan to spread their revolutionary ideals to other farms. So after a while the Used Livestock place switches to selling Soylent Green branded meat, which is, y’know, long pig.

      2. JH-M says:

        I thought it was to prevent the NPC from speaking.

    2. Dreadjaws says:

      Oh, man. Until you mentioned it, it didn’t even occur to me that it could be a smile. I just thought he’d be wearing a bandana over his mouth for some reason.

    3. Syal says:

      On a tangent; there was an indie horror game a while back, I think it was Lone Survivor, where the main character had this same kind of look. I think they were supposed to be wearing a dustmask in that one but it added a lot to the tension to think the main character was walking through the apocalypse with an enormous crazed grin.

  3. kunedog says:

    The big commentary block doesn’t follow the rules from the first post. I assume it’s you, Shamus07.

    1. Shamus says:

      Thanks. Edited for clarity.

  4. Mephane says:

    I just noticed that these comics are apparently all filed under DM of the Rings instead of their own category. Is this intentional, it seems kind of confusing?

    1. Shamus says:

      Yeah, I need to give then their own category. It’s on the to-do list.

  5. Gargamel Le Noir says:

    Those are good jokes, there could have been a profusion of other signs in the lot featuring them.

    1. BlueHorus says:

      (Sign on a pig) ‘A crackling good deal!’
      (On a cow) ‘Udderly ridiculous bargain!’
      (On a chicken coop) ‘So cheap you’ll suspect fowl play!’
      (On a rabbit enclosure) ‘Hare today, gone tommorow!’

  6. CrimsonCutz says:

    What kind of small town or village *doesn’t* have a used livestock dealership?

    1. Karma The Alligator says:

      The ones with a butcher?

  7. DGM says:

    I know that buying your livestock used is cheaper, but then you miss out on that “new cow smell.”

    1. Draco75 says:

      AAaand now I have coffee all over my screen, thanks a lot, ‘DGM’ …

      1. DGM says:

        My work here is done. :P

  8. The Wind King says:


  9. Christopher Wolf says:

    Considering the cost of pig to magic ratio, I think the DM is overestimating how much his world “makes sense”. Then again D&D economies are designed to be nonsense in general.

  10. Chris says:

    I like the part where the DM skipped any random encounters during several days travel just to get through this.

  11. Mr. Wolf says:

    It occurs to me that if they did steal the pigs we’d have a new farmer with exactly the same problem as the old one. Good thing they bought these ones, otherwise this whole campaign could have devolved into one giant pig racket.

    1. Syal says:

      That farmer hires a local goblin horde to get them back for him, and our brave adventurers eat the pigs out of spite.

  12. Amstrad says:

    A used car lot for farm animals immediately made me think of such games as Space Quest I which had a used spaceship lot and the used ship lot in Secret of Monkey Island… in short; used ‘x’ lot seems to crop up in adventure games and it’d be fun to see the livestock angle worked in one.

  13. tmtvl says:

    No character comment? Is this the first comic where that happens or have I not been paying attention?

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