What is Your Zombie Plan?

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Jan 23, 2013

Filed under: Nerd Culture 192 comments

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Last week reader Mr. Guy commented, “Ask me about my zombie plan.” This was in the context of talking about The Walking Dead and our criticism of Kenny’s plan to survive by cramming the group onto a rowboat and watch each other die because we have no food, drinking water, fishing gear, cooking supplies, protection from the elements, or common sense. (Or whatever he was trying to accomplish. We don’t see enough of his plan to understand what he was aiming for, long-term.)

As bad as Kenny’s plan is, I think it’s the best one in the game.

  • Doug: Find a group of competent people and fix their iPhones.
  • Larry and Lily: Rule over people like a mad despot until you run out of food or the group turns on you.
  • Lee: Find someone with a plan and follow them around.
  • Ben: Find someone willing to take you in and then help them to death.
  • Bandits: Let’s murder people for prescription drugs until civilization recovers enough to make us more drugs!
  • The St. Johns: Let’s form a soccer team and eat each other!

Yeah. Not a lot of great plans here. I think Doofenshmirtz throws away better plans than these.

CURSE YOU PERRY THE ZOMBIFIED PLATYPUS!

So… what would your zombie plan be?

No wait. That’s much too broad and lacking in parameters. What I’m really interested in is how you would guide something like Lee’s group to success. Some of you have real-world food stockpiles, bunkers, guns, sports equipment, and muscles. Good for you, but that doesn’t help a character in The Walking Dead universe. So let’s define some starting conditions.

Let’s assume the zombies behave according to the rules of TWD. I realize this is a bit difficult, since zombie stories are always pretty sloppy about rules and TWD plays fast-and-loose even by the standards of the genre. (Teleporting ninja zombies.) But we have to pick SOME universe, because the 28 Days Later zombie plan is very different from your Left 4 Dead zombie plan. In the former, infection is an extreme threat but the infected are doomed to perish before spring, so your plan needs to keep you isolated and hidden for five months or so. In the latter it’s assumed that if you’re alive, you’re immune, and you don’t know when the infected will die. One plan calls for a bunker and the other implies ongoing combat to secure resources.

So let’s assume we’re working within the parameters of TWD: Anyone that dies comes back as a walker. Walkers are mindless and slower than humans but seem to be inexplicably strong. We don’t know how long they will last, so your plans shouldn’t assume they will all be gone next year. Wildlife seems okay and the food-chain is apparently intact. There’s still small pockets of food and fuel to be scavenged, but those are finite. Bandits might be a problem.

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Let’s assume you’re guiding a normal, healthy adult. Not an athlete, but also not someone with serious health problems. (I can’t ever contemplate myself in Zombieland, since my asthma would likely kill me in the first month.) You start out like Lee: In some random location where you don’t know your way around and you don’t have any close family to depend on or worry about. For the purposes of this exercise, we’ll assume you make it through the first few days and get some basic weapons along with a bit of food. You have a safe place to stay for a week or so. Given all this… what do you do next?

  1. Do you seek out people to form a team, or do you go all lone wolf? If you do travel with people, what criteria do you use for choosing companions? If you join a group, what do you do when a Larry joins, or a Ben?
  2. What kind of weapons do you carry? How do you carry them? What other gear do you lug around? Limit yourself to gear that people are normally able to obtain in these stories. So, no tanks. I realize that this seems sort of arbitrary, but “IMMA GET AN F-15 FIGHTER JET LOLOLOL!!!!” seems like cheating. Let’s assume military bases are fortified and you’re warned off by snipers. Stick to stuff that’s available in public places: Stores, homes, schools, etc. No secret bunkers, no government research facilities, no military facilities.
  3. If you’re in North America. then where will you go? There’s a lot of territory here, and Tampa is pretty much a different planet compared to Anchorage.
  4. How do you dress?
  5. What’s your long-term plan? Do you look for a boat and live at sea? Do you look for a farm and try to grow crops? Do you look for some suburbs and scavenge? Do you head for the wilderness and hunt?

What is Your Zombie Plan?

 


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192 thoughts on “What is Your Zombie Plan?

  1. Zagzag says:

    Since I live in the gun free, heavily populated UK, my plan is die very quickly.

    1. GragSmash says:

      You should find a manor full of entrenched military guys and questionable morals.

      1. el_b says:

        unless youre a girl.

        1. Daemian Lucifer says:

          But what if you are a girl thats into military guys with loose morals?

          1. Zoe M. says:

            Go nuts! (No pun intended)

    2. DanMan says:

      Take Car, Go To Mum's, Kill Phil, Grab Liz, Go To The Pub, Have A Nice Cold Pint And Wait For This All To Blow Over

      1. Sorry, Phil!

        And yes, that’s what I’d do. Pubs usually have SOME kind of long-lasting “food”stuffs, at least in germany they tend to. And they tend to be rather cozy.

      2. Steve C says:

        Joking aside, Shawn of the Dead is the most plausible zombie apocalypse I’ve seen. It’s bad for 24 hours, of which most of time nobody realizes is even happening, then a trained army gets control.

        1. drlemaster says:

          I may have posted this before, but Shaun of the Dead did ruin the whole zombie genre for me. I mean, army vs. zombies, hard to imagine that being close without a big helping of writer’s fiat. And I always have been more into Afro-Hatian zombies than the Romero kind.

          1. Nick says:

            There’s some plausible stuff in World War Z about how a modern military might lose to a large zombie horde (the difficulty being the infection spreading quickly enough to make said horde before military response, but that’s another matter)

            Basically most modern weaponry relies on stuff like bleeding out, shrapnel and blasts to have an effect. If you can only kill them by piercing the brain, then that stuff is way less effective than it would be against conventional foes. That combined with shock factor and unknown death rules (i.e. not knowing to shoot the head) and the tables could turn quickly

            1. General Karthos says:

              Of course, the army would typically be briefed on how to kill zombies before beginning operations if they didn’t already know. So they’d probably know to aim for the head, but even if they didn’t, broken bones do seem to be a problem for zombies, and bullets ricocheting off of bones (since the flesh decays and doesn’t stop bullets very well) is going to break them pretty severely, so, while the ideal situation is using a machine gun at head level, even at torso or leg level it’s going to at the very least be useful.

              1. SlowShootinPete says:

                Modern infantry training makes the act of shooting targets in their center of mass pretty much automatic for soldiers, so it would be a bit more tricky than just telling them to aim for the head.

                Dudes with rifles are usually support for bigger weapons like artillery, armor, and aircraft anyway though, so it wouldn’t matter much. It’s all about combined arms these days.

                1. Lunokhod says:

                  A couple of years ago the marines had to do an investigation into how insurgents in Iraq were being killed. Almost all them were killed by shots to the head and there was a fear that the marines were executing them at close range after they had surrendered. Every case was shown to have been from atleast 100 meters and most from over 300. Headshots are not a problem for trained soldiers

                  1. SlowShootinPete says:

                    That sounds a lot like coincidence to me. Even with the optics soldiers use these days, hitting the head of a person 100 meters away who is moving around and shooting back from behind cover isn’t something you can just do on command, which is why soldiers are trained to aim at the torso. A vast majority of the shots they fire miss because killing an enemy in circumstances like that is extremely difficult.

                    Not to say that they’re not capable of getting headshots on zombies, but their training is to shoot into the torso of man-shaped targets and for a substantial number of guys instinct would override reason for the first few battles. The nature of their training makes it an automatic response. They do it what they were trained to do without needing to think about it.

            2. Olivier FAURE says:

              Okay, I know this is 5 years old, but I have to take this: now, the military wouldn’t be especially ineffective against zombies.

              First off, machine guns have lots of bullets. By the time a zombie comes close to melee range, you have to hit them in the head at least once through spray alone.

              Second, heavy machine guns and missiles are ridiculously harmful to human bodies. World War Z acts like this stuff is designed to tickle you to death, except zombies are tickle resistance. In real life, heavy weaponry won’t just cut and bleed human bodies out, it will tear them to shreds.

              In World War I, one guy with a machine gun could hold a trench against hundreds of assailing soldiers if they didn’t have artillery cover, and leave behind nothing but meat shreds. Zombies wouldn’t fare any better.

      3. Kuma says:

        That is “Shawn of the dead”…best zombie movie…ever?

        I live in barcelona Spain, so not many legal fire weapons. First of all, get weapons: for close combat: crowbar or some tool, durable, light and that it can get stuck in a zombie’s head. Mid range: bow and arrows (silent, spare parts and ammo easy to find/make). Long range: 33 cal. rifle with scope and bullets if possible (I would look in some gun shops and police stations if secure) if not, some binoculars. A knife/machete and a pocket size multitool. Chance of getting a handgun are the same as getting a rifle, so if I could I would get one also in case I had to face survivors. A backpack and some basic tools in it, considering that they should not cling in the backpack.

        Get out of the city as soon as I can, go to rural area. Get fortified with small group if necessary in a farm on a hill with animals and small fields close to a river (I know a place like this). Close enough to a village, in case of need to get some medicines. I would make a moat as a perimeter with some basic alarm system, patrols would also be necessary.

        Dress code: no hair or short enough not to be grabbed and tight clothes. Comfortable shoes and a hat/cap. Replacements if possible.

        Companions: I would trust my guts in this issue (don’t like them but need them = colaborate and leave, etc.) I would try to avoid large groups to travel if necessary with, max. 3 or 4 to avoid stupid arguments, ideally an odd number to be able to vote if we didn’t agree. Travel by foot or horse. If we have a group and people want to join, apply hierachy (votes will be limited to 3 or 5 original members). If I or we join a bigger group, respect hierarchy.

        Long term plan: try to survive, not attract attention and run if too many zombies get close…

    3. Mari says:

      That’s my overall plan, too, despite the fact that I live in gun-happy Texas, USA. Honestly I just don’t care much for the hardships of a survival lifestyle. Killing zombies, scavenging for rats to (hopefully) cook over a spit, recycling urine to stay hydrated in the west Texas desert…yeah, that doesn’t sound fun. So unless somebody sets up and advertises a zombie-free safe haven somewhere that I have a shot at getting to within two weeks of traveling (pretty much the upward limit of my tolerance for rat meat and recyc urine) my plan is to go ahead and eat lead.

      I also refuse to die at sea or as a scavenger. The safe haven must be a farming community where we can eke out a subsistence level life with actual cows and goats and vegetables and stuff while holding the zombie predators at bay.

      1. Chris Robertson says:

        It’s not original*, but my plan is to become a zombie.

        I prefer eating to running anyway.

        *But I don’t see it posted here yet.

      2. Thomas says:

        It just doesn’t sound like the life is worth it. Particularly not in the Walking Dead universe, I don’t want to end up fighting to the death with someone over water.

        I feel a bit bad, I know I should try to live, in this game they remonstrate the people who give up, Kenny in particular. But they never give me a reason not to

      3. Z-Ri says:

        “…unless somebody sets up and advertises a zombie-free safe haven somewhere…”

        That would be my plan, though with more emphasis on zombie-free, then on haven. Assuming I could get enough able bodied people to work with me, we/I would fight our way to a super store of some kind and clear it out.

        Once we had one safe, well supplied place we would move out from there, systematically killing zombies, scavenging supplies, and saving survivors. Though we are not trained in this kind of thing, I really don’t think the learning curve on shambling zombie extermination would be very steep.

        After that it would just be a matter of how far we could take it. Maybe there are enough supplies in our super store to last us a week, enough in the whole town to last us a month, enough in the county to last us a few months to a year, and who knows how much once we have multiple counties or most of the state clear. If we are successful we will eventually have enough people and clear territory that we can try to start making our own food while still expanding.

        Of course to get to that point would require lot of hard work and cooperation on my group of survives part. I’m also probably banking on a certain zombie to survivor ratio with this plan.

        1. HiEv says:

          Heh… I just realized that not far from where I live there’s a large construction store, a mattress store, and a grocery store all right next to each other, with a well protected rear and side, and the rest is wide open parking lots for good visibility of any incoming beings.

          Just knock some holes between them, board up the windows (with the supplies from the construction place), and you have just about everything you need survive an apocalypse for a few weeks with a bunch of people and plenty of beds to sleep on.

          1. General Karthos says:

            Make sure to eat the fresh food first, and if you can find a way to can any fruits and vegetables, do so. Also, locate your sources of vitamin C. You don’t want scurvy to make the rounds, especially as that weakens your immune system, and that might make you vulnerable to the virus that you were immune to before.

    4. Soylent Dave says:

      I live in the UK as well, but around the corner from where some armed police are headquartered, so my apocalypse plan has always been to nip into the not-all-that-secret nuclear bunker under the city (entrance also not far from my house) which I’ve always wanted to explore properly, and wait for it to blow over (/ run out of food).

      If even bunkers that everyone knows about are disallowed I’d probably just stay in and fanny about on the internet for as long as it stayed up and running. Blogging the zombie apocalypse would be fun.

      1. madshaw says:

        Where in the uk do you live?

    5. Viktor says:

      Another gun-happy Texan, but yeah. The post-apoc life has nothing of what I enjoy about life in it.

      Though just eating a bullet seems lazy. TWD zombies are stupid, you might as well help other people when you go. I’m thinking grab something big and loud, fire engine works perfectly, and then drive around the city for a bit before luring all the zombies to that nice dead-end road you created. Then blow everything up. Might as well have fireworks at your funeral.

  2. Primogenitor says:

    1 Lone wolf to start – then look to join others after 12 months when natural selection has worked on survivors.

    2 Stuff that doesn’t need hard-to-get ammo – axe & bow.

    3 The coast – zombies generally can’t swim well, and those places tend to be more self-sufficient anyway.

    4 Light and waterproof, camo if bandits or visual hunting zombies.

    5 Find a small island visible from the coast, fish & small farm, learn more details about the zombies – lifespan, speed, strength, hunting, resilience, etc.

    1. Nick-B says:

      A bow would probably be a bad weapon. Becoming skilled with it is a lot harder than it is to fire a gun, and the ammo (arrows) would likely be MUCH less numerous than bullets would be in our gun-focused society. Any walmart will have thousands of rounds of dozens of different sized ammo (in case some nut already got there and took all the 5.56 for their AR-15), all of which is much easier to carry than large, cumbersome arrows.

      Not only that, but I’d wager the stopping or damage dealing power of bullets over that of an arrow any day.

      As for a place to go, places near water are typically high population density, due to it being an easy way to transport goods. Thus a high chance of an excess zombies and low supplies (as goods are easy to transport, you aren’t likely to find large stockpiles unless you are at a walmart distribution center).

      I’d find a mid-to-large sized suburban city and base nearby. A place like where I live, Salt Lake City is major enough to have everything you need, yet the population density is nowhere near most other major cities in the country. It’s at the base of the rocky mountains, and has plenty of fresh spring and snow-melt water to last. Nearby are some isolated yet also urbanized cities, such as the high-altitude Park City which is best accessible through a narrow canyon pass which could, with some effort, be blockaded for protection.

      1. The skill problem for bows is significant. Crossbows are easier to learn by all accounts. On the other hand, the Walmart ammo thing is only true in the US.

        1. Nargon says:

          True, bows won’t cut, needed skill is extra high, if you miss, you’ll definitely gonna hit something hard that destroys your arrow. recovery of arrows? quite impossible(remember this attacking horde?) and you’ll be OOA pretty soon. crossbows? good for sniping, no more, to low loading speed, if you don’t have ammo store nearby, go for two-handed sword or siple axe and maybe, just maybe…

      2. Chamomile says:

        My plan is to go live with this guy. He seems to know what he’s doing and he lives in the same city as me.

    2. BeamSplashX says:

      Lone wolf to start. In 12 months, natural selection will weed out unworthy companions.

      I’m dead by then, so it’s not my problem.

    3. Mormegil says:

      I don’t know about the bow thing being viable. You know how to make arrows right? And you’re good at it and have all your woodworking equipment? Because if you don’t have matched arrows you’ll never be accurate.

      That’s assuming you’re using a recurve or longbow. If you’re using a modern day compound bow or crossbow then you are probably going to have trouble making arrows strong enough to work (I wouldn’t want to try wooden bolts out of something like a PSE TAC-15 for example). Darryl carving his own bolts in the tv series I think is a little misleading.

      Of course you can scrounge carbon and alloy arrows. But then you have to go get them after you’ve used them – not always possible.

      Assuming that all works you now probably have a weapon that’s still too slow to shoot unless you are doing dagger style shooting with something like a horsebow. And then you have to remember that primitive bows aren’t super accurate unless you’re a really good barebow shooter – in ancient warfare they worked more like a machine gun, filling the air with arrows not aimed at any one target. Hunters rely on their targets bleeding out rather than getting an instant kill. No luck with zombies on that one.

      1. Deaderpool says:

        A bullet to the chest or a limb will likely wreck some bone and thus cripple the limb. An arrow that hits anything but the head (assuming you even have arrows and a bow capable of piercing the skull and that you’re so awesome your shots never just glance off the curve of the skull) does basically nothing but make the zombie spiky.

  3. GragSmash says:

    I’d want to live out in Montana or North Dakota. I have family in both places.

    low population density, lots of food, lots of guns.

    If I were stuck down here in Seattle, I’d probably try to make my way up to the mountains where my wife’s family lives. Same conditions, but trying to get there without a car is certain death. It is a nice little valley, but there’s nothing but mountains and frost all around.

    1. BeardedDork says:

      Already living in Montana I’d say this is a pretty sweet place to be if the Zombie Apocalypse comes. Not in Missoula where I live, but out in the country where My folks live.

      I’d head out past where my folks live in Paradise Valley, to the old mining hills near Yellowstone, I can make it just barely from here to there on one tank of gas in my van. I’d take my family of four (myself, my wife, my son & daughter) and one other family of four (strikingly similar actually). My self and my buddy are both former infantrymen and reasonably skilled in survival, both excellent marksmen.

      We(the men)would carry rifles, hatchets knives, and as much ammo as we could carry, which is not likely a lot, but would suffice until we could craft some spears and get good at using them. The women and children would also carry a small amount of cooking supplies, a pan or two, maybe a pot and some knives.

      We would then migrate around living as hunter gatherers. There are many edible plants in the area (currently a lot of cultivated grains which would go wild but still useful within a year or two) and North American Bison routinely leave Yellowstone National Park and roam the nearby flat lands.

      We would start off with the sturdiest clothes we own and replace them with leathers and pelts as they get worn.

      Indefinite survival should be possible, the biggest threats would be death or injury by misadventure, other survivors, and bears/mountain lions.

  4. Lame Duck says:

    Descend into cannibalism almost immediately, then get shot and killed within days when I’m mistaken for a zombie. I call it the Mumbles Plan.

    1. GragSmash says:

      Best plan ever.

    2. Eruanno says:

      I like you, good sir.

    3. Daemian Lucifer says:

      And grow bees.Lots and lots of bees.Because human flesh is best served when glazed over with honey.

      1. Josufu says:

        Who doesn’t like a good honey-glazed ham?

        1. anaphysik says:

          A ham, you say? A large one, perhaps? Surely that’s what happens to Rutskarn in this plan!

          1. Josufu says:

            I was going for the – admittedly tasteless – “long pork” joke. The idea of Mumbles drooling over a honey-glazed Rutskarn will just feed any remaining shippers.

  5. Nixorbo says:

    1. Assuming everybody I know and like is already dead, I would probably lone-wolf it. If I could hook up with people I already know and trust, then I would group it.

    2. Ideally, I would obtain a .22 rifle for ranged needs, a shotgun for closer work and a fire ax for emergencies. Stuff that’s easy to maintain, easy to restock and easy to replace. Perhaps a survival knife (you know, the ones that have compasses and holes for fishing hooks, etc in the hilt). For things that aren’t weaponry, I’d definitely want a mountain bike for getting around.

    3. I would probably stick around the Midalantic region, but in the less-populated regions. I already am passingly familiar with the terrain and the weather doesn’t tend towards extremes very often. The hills of central PA I think would do well for me.

    4. Motorcycle gear, methinks. Leather is hard to bite through but allows for mobility.Not sure what I would use to protect my face, specifically eyes and mouth, while allowing me to wear my glasses, but I’d definitely want to find something.

    5. My goal would be to hold out long enough for civilization to reassert itself, a la World War Z, Fido and/or Shaun of the Dead.

    1. DanMan says:

      Ski goggles are really good protection for eyes that goes over glasses.

      If you can find one, a good leather skull-cap (biker stores have them sometimes) would do wonders for protecting most of your head.

      1. Mari says:

        Heck, why not just hit up the local adult toy store and get a gimp mask at that point?

        1. DanMan says:

          But gimp masks are hard with glasses….don’t ask my why I know that

        2. Asimech says:

          Bonus: if you turn into a zombie with the mouth zipped you can’t bite anyone.

  6. Paul Spooner says:

    Hmm, unintelligent, strong, easily distracted creatures everywhere? Sounds like a time to start taking advantage of this windfall. Make some harnesses and start doing zombie research. Can they be exploited as a free source of energy? Can they act as beasts of burden, pull ploughs, carry stuff, etc? Once I have my army of harnessed zombies carrying, dragging, and pulling all the useful stuff I can find, start traveling around as a caravan and bartering useful goods with other survivors.

    1. Dork Angel says:

      Lol. I can picture zombies with blinkers, head-harnesses and the old carrot on a stick replaced by lump of flesh on a stick…

      1. Paul Spooner says:

        Exactly!
        Of course, this is precisely the kind of thinking Rutskarn denigrates at the end of the next episode. “Zombies? I’m not scared, let’s do science on them!” It intentionally breaks the dramatic mood.
        So, in retrospect, probably not in keeping with the spirit of the discussion… but I can’t help but feel like the “walking dead” phenomena is a massive resource just waiting to be exploited.

  7. Mersadeon says:

    Well, here where I live, I am basically screwed if the Zombies come. See, in America, there A LOT of empty Space. You’ve seen it with the Cannibal-Farm. I live in Europe’s biggest population center, Northrhine-Westphalia. No matter where you are, you can’t look at the horizon without seeing some settlement. The cities here have grown so much that they have fused into a gigantic metropolis. Zombies would be devastating here. So, I guess I would try to find a group and stick with them, unless they become crazy jerks. I would rather die alone and in peace than be betrayed by people like that. I would probably try to go east, there is more open land there. I would try to always keep moving. Staying somewhere for too long just invites disaster.
    This is of course only if your “healthy, average person” thing applies. If I have to be myself? Well, then I’m Zombie-food. Heck, with my legs I’d probably not make it through the initial outbreak anyway.

    1. Paul Spooner says:

      There are still farms all around (yay Google maps!). Sure, the zombie population would be through the roof, but you wouldn’t have to give up entirely. Plus there’s all that infrastructure. If anywhere was going to be cleared out and re-establish civilization, that’s where it would be. You’d probably have a good chance to become one of the New Kings of the world.

    2. Urs says:

      Oh, my parents’ place right on the border to ‘Bergisches Land’ (farms!) is one of the possible places I’d like to be in the Zombie apocalypse. A narrow, high row home with an open staircase of easily unscrewable wodden steps. Not the deathtrap I’m living in here should Zombies start pounding at my door.

  8. Supernal Clarity says:

    Shamus, this is completely off topic, but do you still take questions and suggestions from your readers in somewhere other than the comments section? I clicked the link on your author page where it says “If you're looking to suggest or request an article on a particular subject, look here,” and all I got was a message saying that the page I was looking for couldn’t be found.

    1. Steve C says:

      Same thing happened to me a few months ago. So I submitted a bug report via your form. It failed due to a different bug. I was amused.

  9. Zukhramm says:

    I’d head north. I’m already fairly far up in northern Sweden, and going even further is better as the lower population density will mean both fewer zombies and fewer people to in turn become zombies after zombie attacks.

    Guns aren’t exactly easy to get, but there’s a decent number of hunters, so getting one shouldn’t be impossible. It should definitely not be used to hunt crows.

    Ideally I’d want a group of intelligent people willing to be constructive, building, farming, that kind of thing rather than just wanting to find a hole an hope to survive in it. You can’t really choose who you meet though, but that’s what I’d want.

    Long term, having some kind of house on pillars, or in the trees, something that doesn’t have a door that things can break through, and where nothing can get in without using a brain or flying. For food, farming potatoes seems to be the best option. Can’t just live on potatoes though, hunting might be too dangerous, and a waste of ammunition, fishing and picking berries.

    Even longer term. Get a hydro power plant running, it should be possible with the right people, or in worst case, raiding a library. Scavenge/trade for freezers and refrigerators, start a “food bank” where people can store meat, live off the interest and become king of the apocalypse.

    1. H.R. says:

      I’ll join you, but I’ll convince you to go to finland (more guns there iirc, and fins know what they are doing) or norway (find a fjord, watch zombies fall to their demise, also fishing).

      when and if possible, move to iceland. still fishing, even less people, more localized heat while still being cold enough for zombies to turn into popsicles. also fairies (or so they say)

    2. X2-Eliah says:

      Pretty much this, yeah. Some sort of housing would have to be found on a short-term basis, given the -20 and below temps if we’re talking about winter scenario.
      But as it is, scandinavia in general seems like a pretty neat bet. Low population density (and most of it in the suthern metropolitan areas anyway), lots of forests and rivers.. could be pretty viable. The real issue is the cold… The standard approach – make an overnight shelter in the snow – is way too risky in terms of zeds just stumbling over you.

      1. froogger says:

        I know! On the coast of Norway there are 50.000+ inhabited islands (used to be, anyway). Find a decent sized one with a fresh water source and join that colony – or annex if abandoned. The gulf stream keeps the worst cold away so no risk of the ocean freezing over, and there’s plenty of precipetation for growing crops. Some of the winterstorms can be bad, so you might want one with 500m mountain shielding you from the atlantic. Bring tools, seeds and books and you’re set… until the zombies learn to swim.

    3. Kaeltik says:

      Potatoes, I was just thinking that.
      If the Zs came while my family was here in NC, we’d be screwed. Too many people and I just don’t know the land well enough.
      Now if we could make it up to eastern Idaho, where I grew up, it’d be a different story. Folks in the area are EXTREMELY well armed, my father included. Everyone knows how to camp and fish and most of the adult men are at least passable marksmen. Many of the neighbors belonged to a particular religious sect that encouraged emergency food hoarding. Potato fields are everywhere. The Snake river and several reservoirs provide water for drink and hydro power. Failing that, the reactors out at the INL are remote and very well guarded. Several towns in the region probably wouldn’t even lose power. If worst came to worst, we’d head east, toward Yellowstone, for clean mountain streams rich with trout and crayfish, wild chokecherries, deer, elk, moose, antelope, buffalo, waterfowl, and whatever cattle get lose. The hot springs would be nice in the winter.
      It’s a good thing the Ligertown animals are gone.

  10. Kreek says:

    this ones a bit hard, so lets make a few assumptions about how my situation would go

    first the facts:
    i live in a fairly rural area, i dont drive, i dont have a job, i live with my parents, and i have no real friends
    im also morbidly obese, but otherwise a fairly young and healthy person

    now some assumptions:
    my parents die, this is likely to happen, i would find it rather depressing but it probably wouldn’t be bad enough to prevent me from moving on in a hurry, seems cruel to think about it that way, but im not very close to them emotionally

    because i never go anywhere, id likely be at home when i become aware of the outbreak

    the plan:

    first off, immediate actions, i live in a rural wooded area, its not likely to have alot of zombies right off the bat, my house is fairly unprotected as it is, but id have enough time to fortify it

    step one, get a weapon – there is a pickaxe in the backyard, also a hatchet in the laundry room, this will do for a start, after that, i know that there is a gunshop down the road from where i live, so guns and amunition probally wont be a problem to get ahold of, id probally get and always carry around a pistol, and id likely also get a rifle, ive never fired a real gun, however i live around people who own and use guns, and i know the basics of how to use one

    conclusions: i wont be able to run away so my survival depends on stealth, smarts, and my ability to take down any zombie that attacks me, my weaknesses, well im fat, i get tired easy, and i have a hard time being bored

    now to answer questions:

    1 companions – since i suck, id have to find a group, id take pretty much anyone willing to accept me, if i were somehow put into a leadership role however, my criteria starts with giving any comers a chance, conditions: they have to be able to contribute or pull their own weight, they have a week to shape up or ship out, if they turn out to be a larry, well if anyone trys to kill me, im perfectly in my right to kill them, there are no second chances when it comes to murder, attempted or successful, you kill the living, the living kill you (with ofcorse appropriate exceptions), if your a ben, well, you eather find some way to contribute, or you pull your own weight (and get your own food), fail that and we leave you behind, finally, children are to be protected and cared for, but that doesnt mean they are allowed to do nothing, if they are too young to help out, its up to their parent/caregiver to pull their weight or do their work

    2 weapons- everyone, even children, carrys a melee weapon, a knife, an axe, a bat, doesnt matter aslong as it works
    the best guns go to the guy with the best aim, and hopefully everyone gets atleast a handgun

    3 location – try to find a farm, and grow crops, raise animals, its the best chance to survive longterm, failing that, travel constantly, stick to rural areas outside of cities, hunt primarily

    4 clothing – wear what you like, personally i can handle the cold, its the summer heat thats my biggest enemy, also never fail to forget that naked is always an option, and modesty has no place in the apocalypse

    5 long term – as i stated before, farming and hunting are the only sustainable options, stick to rural areas, only go into cities when absolutely nessessary

    final word: ultimately, the plan boils down to one thing: don’t die

  11. LunaticFringe says:

    Do zombies freeze in this scenario? Cause I think one Canadian winter would probably wipe them out. So all I’d need are supplies to last me several months and some kind of heating sources. Tall orders, but not something that’s impossible. Canada’s got other benefits too, like low population density over a vast area of land.

    1. Aquin says:

      Yeah I was just thinking this. I live in a dense mountain range far in the north. If zombies broke out across the globe, I think I’d still be more worried about the bears and cougars instead of anything else.

    2. Daemian Lucifer says:

      That depends on which zombies.Id wager that canadian and russian zombies would be pretty resistant to cold.

      1. LunaticFringe says:

        Pfft I had to cut open a tauntaun and rest in it for a couple minutes just to get to work today (coldest day on the Ottawa River in the past decade, if anyone cares).

    3. This is a “what flavor of zombies are you fighting” thing, as in several stories, cold either slows the zombies down, or halts them completely… until they thaw.

      If you get the latter, you could make a hobby of looking for zombie-sickles and bashing their skulls in before spring.

    4. Burton Choinski says:

      An article on Cracked discussed why this may not be as much of a problem. Some of the points make sense (again, depending on how the zombies operate)

      http://www.cracked.com/article_18683_7-scientific-reasons-zombie-outbreak-would-fail-quickly.html

  12. Jeff R. says:

    Kenny had half a good plan. I think that find/build a boat and then get yourself to a decent-sized island, big enough to have fresh water and fruit and such, small enough to completely clear out, is a good enough general plan.

    This is assuming that TWD zombies don’t ocean-floor-walk (or lake/river walk; islands on freshwater would be even better in a lot of ways, although there’s more danger from other living people there) and eat all the fish in the world like WWZ Zombies, of course. I don’t think that’s been established one way or the other in any of the TWD media so far.

    1. Daemian Lucifer says:

      “This is assuming that TWD zombies don't ocean-floor-walk”

      Seeing how a boot can squish their heads easily,Id assume that the pressure of tons and tons of water would crush them if they tried.

      1. X2-Eliah says:

        Still an issue for rivers, seas, lakes though. I don’t think that even places like the mediterranean have all that much depth-pressure between the coastlines and some nearby islands.

    2. Jimmy Bennett says:

      Even if the Zombies can ocean-floor walk I think you’d still be relatively safe. Zombies move slowly, and it’s a long way to travel to get to (relatively) nearby islands. Statistically, I’m pretty sure that any zombies that wandered into the ocean would end up blindly shuffling across the ocean floor.

      To use a real-world example, let’s suppose that tens of thousands of zombies wander into the ocean around Long Beach. I doubt that even ten of them would make it as far as Catalina and crawl onto shore. Most of them would be stuck endlessly wandering the floor of the Pacific.

      And that’s assuming they don’t wander past a school of hungry sharks.

      Even if zombies can walk along the ocean floor, islands still function pretty well as remote geographic locations.

      Of course, the real problem in the Waking Dead universe is the plot driven teleporting zombies, but I don’t know how you plan for such a contrived scenario.

    3. Steve C says:

      Since they are bloated corpses I always assumed that zombies would float around aimlessly on the waves and tides. It’s why I’ve never thought an island refuge as a good idea.

    4. carrigon says:

      This was my thought. The East Coast is dotted with islands, some tiny, some rather large. There is even (at least) one Wildlife Refuge on an island pretty damn close to the Savannah area. I am a hunter, a decent shot with a rifle or shotgun, so I could make do as far as meat. I’ve had an organic garden for a few years but I’m a lazy ass when I can drive a mile to the nearest grocery store, but eventually that source will run out one way or another; I think I can ditch lazy when it comes to mine and my family’s survival. My son (7) is a better fisherman than I am, so there’s that too.
      I’m an Eagle Scout and a paramedic, so I have wilderness survival and medicine kinda covered, and if Dad makes it (he doesn’t unless we can find a huge supply of his heart medicine)he’s a retired surgeon. My problem would be the weather. Get on an island great, have a canoe or rowboat (silence is golden) to scavenge the mainland great, but even living 400 miles from the North Carolina coast we’ve had some bad ones, Hugo and Ivan in particular. They weren’t nearly as bad here as they were on the coast, but Ivan was one of the few times I’ve been legitimately been sent out as part of the NC Swiftwater Response, that was 80 miles further inland in the mountains. I wouldn’t want to try to survive anything like that in a palm hut on a seaward island!

  13. Abnaxis says:

    Never made a zombie plan before. Being diabetic, I’m pretty much boned in a post-apocalyptic setting anyway. However, for fun:

    1) 2-3 like-minded individuals. Bare minimum necessary to be able to sleep in shifts and no more. Basically enough to get benefits a la Pair Programming without the detriments a la Engineering by Committee

    2) Melee for zombies, all the way. Quiet, less opportunity for friendly fire. I’m thinking sldgehammer–something that doesn’t require a headshot to at least break some disable, or maybe an aluminum pole fashioned into a zombie head-skewer. Axes seem too hard to control precisely enough. Still need a gun and some ammo to fend off other survivors (not mounds of ammo, we aren’t trying to start a war–1 clip per person is enough to let others know we aren’t worth the cost of messing with).

    Other equipment is tough. Soap and first aid kit to deal with injuries. Some way to carry water. Some way to eat food would be nice, but very dependent on starting location. Trapping supplies would be awesome–traps can be reset, while ammo supply used in hunting is generally not sustainable. Sleeping bag and pillow, because exhaustion doesn’t help. Book describing edible plants, if available.

    3) That one’s tough, because I know good places close to where I live, but those wouldn’t really be the objective best places. I guess…find a wide river bank in Appalachia. Plenty of foraging around, supply of fresh water and possibly fish, backs against a wall that doubles as quick egress for defense.

    4) Again, depends somewhat. If on the move, long sleeves with as much skin coverage as possible. If summer (Summer in the south close to water can get HOT and MUGGY) may forgo long sleeves if relatively secure.

    5) Kinda gave it away with #3. Live off foraging and fishing at the river. Always keep a boat ready to set off if trouble comes, plenty of plant-life, and enough resources for all the nutrition a budding survivalist needs.

    1. harborpirate says:

      I think the sledgehammer idea could doom you. Even the light ones are a real pain in the ass to swing accurately, and very slow even if you’re strong. With a sledge, you’ll only get one shot before that zed is eating your face. Another disadvantage: inexperienced users tend to swing weak “dink” hits for the first several attempts; a sledge takes some practice to deliver a forceful hit. Also, if you miss, you can bust your own leg.

      A sledge would be a great finishing tool for a zed that’s already disabled, and also would be good to have around if you plan on bashing through a lot of doors; but otherwise its just going to be a burden.

      You’d be way better off with an aluminum baseball bat. Very light, easy to swing, durable, quite common, good reach, decent stopping power, unlikely to get stuck, and just about anyone can use one without any practice. Will it cave a zed skull on the first swing? Unlikely, but in the zombie apoc, its all about giving yourself a fighting chance.

      In a pinch, saw the head off that sledge and use the hickory handle.

      And, if we’re being really honest with ourselves, if you’re engaged in melee with a zed, you’re probably already done for. Did pioneers figure on not wasting bullets by taking down wolves and cougars with their knives and bare hands? Traps and bullets are a better bet.

      When the zombie apoc hits, and the military somehow fails, that’s what you are. You’re mountain man guy, wilderness pioneer dude. Those are the skills you’ll need over the medium term, after supplies run out but before society re-establishes. Water finding, firestarting, hunting, water purifying, shelter building. Recognize dangerous areas and avoid them. Know how your scent carries in the wind. Etc.

      1. Abnaxis says:

        Gunfire doesn’t attract wolves and cougars. Rather the opposite, actually. If every predator came charging out of the woods in response to random gunfire, I would say mountain men might have adopted different tactics.

        I would argue that if you have a large number of zeds aware of you, you’re already done for. I’m not going for ‘leet KPD, I’m going full avoidance as much as possible. The only time you should be fighting a zed period is in the rare instance where it is absolutely the only way forward.

        The point of the sledge is that I’m not trying to kill. I’m trying to knock down. Screw accuracy, if there’s enough room to get some momentum any solid hit will knock the thing down regardless of hit location. A bat would also be seviceable, but it has less reach and requires you to precisely hit the knees or the head to really halt an advance.

        No matter how well-armed you are, there will virtually always be more zombies than bullets. Having a shootout in the zombie apocalypse is prolonged suicide.

        1. harborpirate says:

          I still think it would be dubious to try to use a sledge against a zombie.

          Even when you get fast with it, it is still a slow weapon, and it always requires two hands to use. I think there would also be a real danger of the head of the hammer getting caught in a ribcage or what’s left of internal organs.

          But really, the biggest problem with a sledge is weight. I’ve done quite a lot of backpacking, and hauling an 8 pound sledge around would be a huge pain. That’s a lot of weight when you have to carry it around on your back all the time! I’d much rather be hauling 6 pounds of water and a 26 ounce aluminum bat.

          Aluminum baseball bat, wood baseball bat, or framing hammer would be what I would be looking to scavenge; probably in that order. I don’t have any personal experience swinging a crowbar, so I can’t give an informed opinion on that one.

          Some stuff on the physics of baseball bats, just for the fun of it:
          http://www.acs.psu.edu/drussell/bats/batw8.html
          http://www.acs.psu.edu/drussell/bats/bat-moi.html

          I probably spend way too much time thinking about the zombie apocalypse.

  14. Retsam says:

    Haven’t played TWD yet, (or watched this season of SW, since I do plan to play it eventually) so I might not be making some of the best tactical decisions based on the specifics of these zombies. (Though the description here helped)

    Among my friends from home (before college) we had something of a standing zombie plan.

    Base:
    I’m from Chicago suburbs (not ideal, probably), in our town the local Target store (Target is a slightly upscaled Wal-Mart) is built with the store elevated above the parking below, with two escalators and an elevator leading up to the shopping area. (There’s probably a freight elevator around as well, but probably not more stairs) Fortifying this store was always the core of our plan.

    If we could get there, the escalators could be barricaded/destroyed (or at least well defended) leaving the elevator (or at least, the shaft, if power dies) as a main entrance/exit route, if necessary. We can scavenge building supplies from the Menards (hardware store) next door.

    Food:
    Being in a target store should provide short to long term food supplies, depending on how many people are in our group. A handful to a couple dozen could make it quite a long time on that sort of food supply. A smallish army (30-200) would probably make it a few weeks before running low on food, but it would be more of an issue. Certainly this seems about the best we can hope for as food goes in any case, since agriculture probably isn’t an option.

    Power:
    Assuming the power goes out eventually (it almost always does), we’d want to find some generators. Keeping lights, refrigerators (important if food is an issue to keep perishable food), and heaters running would seriously help survival. Generators can possibly be scavenged from the hardware store; otherwise we might have to attempt to improvise something. (Modify a car engine perhaps? I hope we have a mechanic in this group) In either case, gasoline would also become a valuable resource. Some could certainly be siphoned from vehicles in the surrounding area; but this might be a long term problem.

    Weapons:
    While a few of my friends own weapons and would plan to bring them, this would be another issue for my plan, a shortage of guns. Certainly some “alternative weapons” could be found at the hardware store, (melee weapons, as well as “chainsaw on a stick” ideas) though the efficacy of non-gun weapons might be an issue. Another thought might be getting some fertilizer and rigging up thermite, though I don’t know the exact recipe for that off the top of my head.

    Other Survivors:
    If there’s enough, dealing with other survivors might be as problematic as the zombies. Heading to a store to pick up resources won’t be a unique idea, and I live in a fairly populated area; actually establishing control over the Target store before it’s looted might be near impossible. Who’s going to listen to the couple of teenagers (well, 20-somethings now) who’ve played too many video games for their survival? And if the entire place is looted too quickly the strategic value of the building is much less.
    If survivors are rarer, this might not be an issue. Convincing a few people to stand and fortify a position would be a manageable task, compared to a massive panicking mob.

    So yeah.
    TL;DR: I’ve thought about this a little bit in the past.

    1. Retsam says:

      Reading other comments, I realize I sort of forgot the original 5 specific questions that were asked; oh well. Feel free to deduct from my final grade in the class for bad form.

    2. Fang says:

      Gas wouldn’t be a problem, so long as you are running them for fridges only and maybe couple(3-6) lights. Run it for… 3-4 hours a day just to keep the food cold, would be enough. The generator at my house is old, leaky, etc(now broke and getting a hopefully modified camper generator) could run for an hour or so on just half a gallon of gas. New ones would, hopefully, be able to run longer and more efficiently.

      Heaters, you can just use Propane ones and a 30 lb cylinder would last you… a week or so even running it non-stop. Same with cooking, last you a long time.

  15. Well, I think I’d bank on the basic notion that the zombies themselves, contrariwise, do not plan. They probably don’t travel around a whole lot–I’m sure they sort of drift, but they don’t do organized migration in search of food, is what I’m saying. So attrition is a workable approach to the problem anywhere the population isn’t really heavy.

    This suggests that places which were relatively sparsely populated are better than cities. But I’m no good at surviving in howling wilderness. So I’d start off by trying to grab some loot from Mountain Equipment Co-op and maybe upgrade weapons a bit, ideally stuff that didn’t require ammunition I can’t make. Maybe a crossbow; quarrels are reusable and if necessary I could probably load that with sharpened sticks–they’d be inaccurate but not too bad at short range. Then I’d try to find somewhere defensible in a smaller town, something past the burbs but still within striking distance of cities in case I need something specialized sometime.
    I’d hole up, but I’d go out every day and nail one or two zombies, ideally from a safe distance or by setting traps for them, and scavenge the town systematically for food and gear and tools over time, starting close to my bolthole and working wider as I got to know the area better and thinned out the zombies. My general plan would be to eradicate the zombies from my local area so that hopefully I would eventually only have to deal with the occasional stray. That’s why a town–in the city there’d be just too damn many, in the wild there wouldn’t be enough salvage to live off.
    If the zombies are slightly smarter I’d need to find a place that I could sneak in and out of, and start my killing and salvaging a short distance away so they don’t converge on my hideout while there are still lots of them.
    Once I’d got rid of my local zombies, spending more time outdoors would be practical. At that point I’d be set to start doing some gardening and learning how to hunt and generally moving from a scavenging approach to learning to produce my own goods.

    If I met other survivors I’d basically say “I’m figuring to do this approach and I’d love some help. If you want to do something different good luck to you and if it doesn’t work out I’ll hopefully still be here if you need a hand. But I’m not going to change my approach so don’t stick around with me unless this is your basic angle too.”
    If I could get hold of some of my friends I’d want to team with them, and if I could get hold of my family I’d have a responsibility to team with them. But again, I wouldn’t change my basic approach unless someone had a really, really compelling idea.

    More travel than absolutely necessary strikes me as a bad idea because you just meet whole new bunches of bad news all the time and the bad news always has home turf advantage. Each conflict weakens you, but the next enemies you meet are completely fresh. My area is good enough (suburban British Columbia–I’d just head further out of the city to a sparse enough town further up the valley).

  16. stratigo says:

    You guys are waaaay too hard on Kenny’s plan.

    Boat is a fantastic idea. It provides: Security and mobility. You don’t need anything else to start with. You use said boat to scavenge coastlines for everything else. Eventually, (and by eventually I mean a few to a lot of years) you’ll probably run out of stuff and scavenging is gone. This is the point you find somewhere safe to settle, build a defensible location, and start becoming agrarian.

    Honestly zombies are less a problem for a farmer community then bandits would be for a premodern farming community.

    1. Daemian Lucifer says:

      A good plan would be to get to a huge boat,an ocean cruiser.But with a dinky 2-4 people fishing boat,youd be pretty much screwed.

      An ocean cruiser would not only provide you with plenty of storage space,but also a place to build a greenhouse where you could grow food.You could also build a home made desalinizator.So your only concern would be fuel.But then again,thered be no need for you to move anywhere.

      1. stratigo says:

        A fishing boat can house several people in… adequate living conditions. Depends I guess on the kind of fishing that boat does. But for about 5 people (Kenny’s family and Lee and Clem. And remember, Kenny wasn’t planning on others getting on his boat at first) it works perfectly. And since building desalinators(XD) and greenhouses is out of most people’s aptitude ANYWAYS, the size of the boat doesn’t matter beyond storage capacity and fuel requirements. A cruise ship would be terrible for anyone not completely organized,cause those things will guzzle supplies.

        You can store enough food for a week or two, same with fuel, and stay near the coastlines. You don’t have to worry about zombies at all hitting where you sleep, and once you run out of scavenging, you motor to the next scavenge spot. A deep seas fishing boat is probably the very best you can get for a small group.

        1. Daemian Lucifer says:

          I was more referring to the one they found in the game.

          As for desalinators(thanks) and greenhouses,it doesnt really take that much skill to make a simple one.Just slap a few panes of glas together around some flower pots and theres your amateurish greenhouse.In the same vein,just put a rag over a heated pot,and squeeze the water out of it every few minutes,and theres your amateurish desalinator.Though they wont give you nearly as much produce as professional ones,they can keep a few people alive for some time.

          1. Steve C says:

            Cruise ships generally have proper desalination plants on board because they need them. Using up 260,000 gallons of fresh water every day is a lot to haul around on a 1 week trip.

        2. Steve C says:

          I’m with Daemian on the boat idea. A big ship is good, Kenny’s plan (small pleasure craft) is idiotic. Ever been in a small boat in choppy weather on a lake? It’s not fun. Ever been in a small boat in a storm on the ocean? I’m guessing not because you are alive right now.

          The smallest boat I’d consider for long term would be big enough to carry a tender (a small boat). A deep sea fishing boat would qualify. A cruise ship only guzzles supplies if you use it to cruise around. Keep everything off (especially main engines) and it has literally tons of supplies.

    2. Jimmy Bennett says:

      The only problem with Kenny’s plan was Kenny’s starting location. If he’d been in Savannah when the zombie apocalypse happened, assuming he managed to survive the initial chaos, his plan could have worked brilliantly. As people have said elsewhere, you can take the boat to a nearby island and start living off the land there.

      I think that’s my plan. I live in San Diego, so I’d probably try to lay low when the initial chaos hits. Once things have calmed down I’d try to gather a team and head towards the bay.

      It would be a gamble, because I’d be in the middle of a massive population center, but assuming we made it onto a boat, we could easily pilot it out to an island (there are a couple small islands off the coast of Tijuana. I’m not sure if they’d be any good for growing crops, but at the very least, we could forage for berries and such.)

      Between that and the fishing, I think we’d be set.

      If someone on the team knows how to operate a sailboat that would be ideal. I think I could figure it out, given enough time and trial and error, but the risk of accidents would be pretty high early on.

    3. Peter H. Coffin says:

      Where there’s one boat, there’s many. And the security on them is very, very limited. The real reason that stolen boats doesn’t happen very often is that you can’t use them to rob convenience stores, they’re VERY distinctive and very habitual, and the police force that oversees them is armed with assault rifles and deck guns instead of 9mm.

      On the other hand, where the heck IS the Coast Guard and Navy? Their emergency response to ANY crisis is to get on the water and sort it out from there. There’s no corpse on boats on those boats, zombies don’t seem to seem even to have the coordination of thought to undo a seat-belt, so they’re not going to put to sea themselves.

  17. scowdich says:

    I can’t address the five points above right now (I’m on my mobile), but as an American, my basic plan has always been: warehouse store. Find a big-box store, a Costco or Sam’s club for preference (lots of food, medicine, etc), a Wal-Mart otherwise. These stores have lots of supplies, high shelves that can be turned into fortifications, and rolling steel doors for good security. An expansive roof could, over time, be turned into a zombie-inaccessible vegetable garden, and in the winter (when zombies will either be sluggish, or frozen solid), forays can be made to other locations for additional tools, weapons, and supplies.
    Why would anyone be stupid enoughh to go to a mall?

    1. Your biggest problem would be defense (glass windows, multiple entry points that can be exploited by other survivors that might not think zombies will follow) along with (possibly) weather.

      Those stores aren’t the most efficient setups for heating/cooling. People died in frontier times from not having enough heat, and even if you used a Home Depot shed in the middle of the store, you’d need an accessible means to keep yourself from freezing to death. This assumes you’re not somewhere south to begin with, so there’s that.

      1. BeardedDork says:

        Really, I’d say the problem with this plan is ultimately the same problem with Kenny’s plan, there are going to be a lot of people (competitors) doing it.

      2. scowdich says:

        As to your remark about defense, most of the big-box stores around me (other areas may be different) only have windows outside the entrances – they’re sealed off when the shutters are closed. I hadn’t really considered the heating problem, but if it comes down to it, even a wood fire on the concrete floor would be better than nothing, but it would take some time to deplete any stores of propane from the camping/barbecuing sections.

  18. Dev Null says:

    Well, that still leaves a LOT of holes in our knowledge about how the zombies work, so…

    Plan A: start experimenting with zombies to find out how they work.

    Can they swim? Or float? Or walk through water? Or be drowned? Are they particularly flamable? Does burning stop them? Do they need to breathe? Where do they get the energy from to move? Are they magic? Does any other sort of magic work then?

    Then form plan B once you know what you’re working with. Plan B may be “get my mentally controlled army of zombie minions to build me an enormous stone tower (black) on an island, so I can get down to the serious buisiness of perfecting my aim at throwing fireballs.”

    (Any scenario that doesn’t involve magic essentially comes down to the zombies running out of energy fairly quickly, since they’re not smart enough to farm or quick enough to catch anything but the slower stupider humans. Wait em out, and burn your dead.)

    Oh yeah; and stay the heck away from WalMart. Your biggest danger is going to be other humans, and those places are going to be deathtrap fire zones.

  19. Drmodem says:

    Any successful long term zombie survival plans would require a decently sized group(you need to reproduce, and you need as much help as possible) that’s willing to work together and a large fortified(with walls) farm. You can’t rely on anything that runs on gas or electricity. You will have to make weapons that don’t rely on highly manufactured ammo… ammo which will very shortly run out and be comply used up, like the gasoline. You need a farm, because scavenging for food (or cannibalism) is not a long term workable solution. You can’t know when civilization will reassert itself so you have to plan like its going to be this way forever. If all goes well, you should essentially end up with a medieval walled town after a while. Primitive weapons (swords, spears, bows etc) should be used primarily for hunting and zombie killing, and all heavy firepower weaponry should be stored in an armory for use in emergencies that require them where the primitive weapons would be at a disadvantage such as an attack by roving bandits with guns.

    Everyone who would successfully put that plan into place would eventually become the rebirth of civilization, because they would have a sustainable food source, a growing population, an army with plenty of weapons, an organized system of government and a safe fortress operate out of. The loners, bandits and the ones who fortify walmarts will quickly find death at the hand of themselves, each other or the zombies.

    1. Abnaxis says:

      I think people seriously underestimate just how many things in nature are edible. Many weeds are edible. Kudzu is edible. Proteins and carbs are going to be tough, but those would be rather tough to grow in a farm as well without a mill.

      IMO, in a small group with enough knowledge (survivalist books would be the most valuable thing to get a hold of), hunting and gathering is really the way to go.

  20. Daemian Lucifer says:

    My plan:Screw you guys,Im going outa here!Bullet,meet brain.

    If it were any other kind of apocalypse,Id might try out something,but zombies,no way man,thats where I draw the line.Not because of the dead coming to life and walking,but because everyone who survives will be turned into an asshole.

    1. Even says:

      You can always be the hero they need but don’t deserve. You’d probably be made a martyr, but better go out in a meaningful way, ey?

  21. Ravens Cry says:

    In my opinion, the most dangerous danger of a zombie Apocalypse is other people.
    That being said, lone wolfing sounds terrible, so I’d find friends if I could.
    One thing I would like to try to get would be seeds and potatoes. Sure, it’ll be a while before we can settle down most likely, but it is still important to think long term.
    I would ride a bike rather than cars, because cars are noisy, attracting not only Zombies, but other people who will want your fuel and/or ride.
    It’s also the most energy efficient means of transportation, and while an exhausted pedestrian might be mistaken for a zombie, I’ve never seen a zombie ride a bike.
    Weapons you can re use, like spears, swords, and potentially bolts and arrows sound better than guns if, again, you are thinking long term. We have no idea how long this will last. It might be months, it might be years or even generations before civilization gets back on its feet.
    Bullets are a finite resource and are loud,announcing your presence not only to zombies, but, again, to raiders and looters.

  22. monkeyboy says:

    Well I’d start with my family and go from there as far as a group is concerned. As far as location, a Costco is a great, defensible position, but once I’ve stocked up the long term position has to be an old fort, like Fort Monroe near my house, or Fort Pulaski if we are staying near Savannah.

    The issue is food and water, miss the planting season and its another year before you can think of eating from your garden.

  23. Dave B. says:

    1: Group Composition. I would want to team up with at least one other competent person, but I would prefer to keep the group at about 4 people. The more in the group, the more potential for conflict. As for Larry or Ben, I’m not willing to just throw people out of the group at the first sign of trouble, We would need a strong leader who has the support of the group and could keep everyone in line…so probably not me.

    2: Gear. I don’t think many people realize how heavy guns are until they have carried one around for a few hours. I would prefer to keep a pistol with me at all times in a secure holster, and have a lightweight rifle with a sling for traveling or patrols. Also, a knife, rope, food and water for at least two days, a lighter, a couple of screwdrivers and an adjustable wrench, and ammunition according to how heavy and plentiful it is. Most of these things are easily obtainable and light enough that an average person could carry them.

    3: Location. I would prefer the region around Ohio, Kentucky, and Virginia. It has some features that would be useful: good soil for farming, wild game, a fairly low population density, rivers, forests, small towns.

    4: How do you dress? My clothing would tend to be more influenced by weather conditions than by the zombie threat. Sure, leather can stop a bite, but you will have to be extra careful about hydration and ventilation during the summer. It would be a shame to survive a zombie attack and then die from heat.

    5: Long term plan. This one is difficult. A good zombie plan is, by definition, open-ended. You can’t account for every possibility unless you happen to be Hari Seldon. Because of my choice of location, the obvious plan would eventually involve both hunting and farming. The goal would then be to settle there permanently and farm until the zombies go away or you all die.

  24. Tomcat says:

    I Live in the UK (Yorkshire) so I already have EXTENSIVE experience in dealing with zombies that don’t have two braincells to rub and that wander around mumbling and trying to beat the hell out of anyone this isn’t one of “their kind” (chavs)

    I’m fairly built since I workout every now and then and work on a construction site as a 3-phase electrician, i however have problematic knees to walking long distances would be out of the question

    I would wear a full leather biking jacket with as many metal studs as possible.
    For weaponry I would first get some form of melee weapon preferably a blunt instrument such as a sledgehammer since breaking their legs (aim for the knee from the side) in one fell blow would stop them chasing me around quickly and would be a quicker way to put one out of the fight / my way that trying to go for a “kill” with a sharp instrument

    Get some weaponry and as much ammo as would fit in my car from the small army base a 5min walk away if it was desolate. for a Brit I have a lot more experience with firearms than many people even though I have only fired .22 hunting rounds from a 1 round bolt action (rabbit hunting) and a bird-shot firing 20g shotgun (hunting again) before but that’s more experience than 95% of the population, I’m sure I would get used to a SA80 pretty quick considering the situation

    I would drive my ford focus for a while and try to “trade” it in for some dead guys large 4×4 (hot-wiring a possibility)

    I would stay the hell away from the city centre and “stash” my extremely squeamish and “delicate” fiancée somewhere safe and well barricaded with a gas stove and few tins of beans as I went around for a few days at maximum looking for friends / family. after I was confident that I have everyone that is useful / I care about. I would take my fiancée with me and any friends/extended that survived the mid-south of the Pennines west of derby where there is fertile ground to farm in but still plenty of cover and high points, I would set up in a cottage and try to find a a diesel generator and drive around the various petrol stations siphoning off fuel from he main tanks using a portable generator and fuel-safe pump into a large tank of some kind mounted on a appropriated truck, while I was off doing this I would have any “mates” that are like me (competent and able) doing the same as me while the less able sort out the “homebase” working on plants and potato I would set up a electric fence (lethal at 5000v with capacity for 3A sustained current) that would be switched from the outside or inside (zombies too dumb to open a fusebox and shut off the power) lethal for upto 60 walkers in parallel and even if 100 piled on it would keep them immobilized until I could push them off with a plastic pole, the current draw might piss with the rectifier and after a while though but its not like i couldn’t fix it or go get spares, I would then slowly expand this ring of defence and invite people in if they could pull their weight either as intelligent/experienced but inactive people (old folk ect) with the younger people like myself as farmers salvagers gathers defenders this cycle of admitting people would continue until we had a town filled with people “ruled” with only basic rules and by a meritocracy (i/e i would keep the electric fence and electric generation running, some ex-army bloke/lass would lead the defence team, some farmer run the food production, someone that knows about) so on so forth

  25. Katesickle says:

    1. I’d probably seek out others. Having more people means more sets of eyes to watch for zombies, more people who can fight if zombies show up, and the ability to divide labor. That last one is going to be important if we have to start doing things like farming. At the very least it allows you to have someone on guard duty while someone else focuses on, say,cooking dinner.

    I don’t know that my criteria would be all that strict. “Don’t be a moron” would basically be the rule for entry. If the people DID turn out to be morons, then I’d probably leave and look for a better group. I’d rather be with others than alone, but I’d rather be alone than with idiots who are going to get me killed. The only other rule I can think of is “have the same basic plan as me, or a better plan” because obviously grouping doesn’t work if everyone wants to use different strategies and go different places.

    Not sure what I would do with someone like Ben. With Larry the answer is easy: either he goes or I do, because he deliberately puts people in danger (the whole punching Lee into a hoard of zombies thing). But Ben’s problems seem to at least partially come from him being in a group of crazy people. Other than not telling everyone about taking the supplies (and not defending Clementine, which I’m too much of a coward myself to fault him for) what has he really done that’s bad? Any group that I would bother to stay with would be a group where Ben would be able to explain what he was intending to do with the supplies. Sure, Ben isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed and shouldn’t be trusted with a ton of responsibility, but I think I could handle someone like him in a group.

    2. For weapons, I’d follow the Alton Brown school of thought: no unitaskers. If it can’t do something else besides kill zombies, it’s wasted space. I’m going to try and avoid fighting as much as possible anyway, so I’m going to need tools that double as weapons. Best bet is to find a hardware store and look around. I’d definitely want a hatchet and a clawed hammer, and I’d probably find other useful non-weapon things (like a swiss army knife, or a tool belt to hold everything). I know sometimes those places sell things like mace, so I’d probably take some and test it out the next time I faced a zombie. If it worked I’d make sure to grab as much as I could.

    If I found a gun/ammo I’d probably take it with me, but honestly I’m not sure how much I’d be able to rely on guns. How long would I be able to keep ammo for it? How many more zombies would the noise attract? Am I even a decent shot? In an emergency a gun would help, but avoiding those situations altogether seems like the better plan. So I’d be willing to carry a gun, but not rely on one.

    3. I’m not really sure. I’d want someplace with moderate climate (to avoid freezing to death in winter or dying of heat stroke in summer) that’s got a bit of distance from populated areas, while still being close enough that the occasional supply run could be made. Though the ultimate idea would be to set up a self-sufficient community. So a river is pretty much necessary for water and for fish, and then land that could be utilized for small-scale farming (though gathering food could also work if stuff grows there naturally). I’d want lots of trees for raw materials.

    4. Jeans, long sleeves (or short sleeves with a jacket that can be tied around my waste when not in use), sneakers or boots (preferably boots). Gloves would be good to have as well. Obviously this would change depending on the climate I found myself in, but the goal would be to balance temperature, ease of movement, and armor against zombie teeth.

    5. Like I said above, self-sufficient community. Walls to keep zombies at bay, a river for water and fish, a farm, and small houses to live in. Foraging off of cities would only work for so long (canned goods don’t keep forever) and cities are where you’re going to find the most zombies anyway. The boat option might work, but you have to A) find an appropriate boat (big enough for your group, with sales/oars, in good condition) and B) know how to sail and maintain said boat. That said, I think a floating village would be a pretty good way to deal with zombies if you could make it work. Or take the boat to a small island not too far from the mainland, clear it of zombies, and use that as the base for your self-sufficient community.

  26. Tohron says:

    Given that the zombies rely entirely on their hands and teeth to attack, getting/making effective body armor would be my #1 priority. I would make some for myself, then make some more, using that skill to get into a group.

    Weapon-wise, having a pistol would be useful as a backup, but primary weapons would be an axe, then a knife (and possibly spikes on the elbows/knees) if they start grappling you.

    Longer term, agriculture seems like the most reliable food source – effective body armor would enable people to regularly work outside without worrying about zombies showing up – since even if they get mobbed, they can last long enough for help to arrive.

  27. Duffy says:

    As most said short-term scavenge some quick supplies and weapons, predominately non-perishable dry goods, leather clothing/jackets, and melee weapons if possible. Guns don’t hurt but they shouldn’t be used very often. If I could find a bow or crossbow that at least has a chance of lasting longer ammunition wise.

    Maybe some spear like implements, reach gives a big advantage. I’ve always wondered if the phalanx or roman squares technique would be effective against zombies.

    Once the immediate panic and initial event have passed I would try and make my way out to any Amish communities I could find. They would already be used to living and farming without too many modern implements which should keep us fed, clothed, and sheltered. At that point it would be a matter of fortifying homes/bases and eliminating zombies. Leaving a zombie alive that you could have been easily killed is foolish. One less zombie could have an exponentially positive effect.

    1. Olly says:

      Given that the Testudo (Roman squares technique) was a slow moving defencive technique designed to withstand sustained attack from projectile weapons …. pretty sure it’d be terrible against zombies.

      Using the Viking era Shield-Wall approach however should be super effective. A solid wall of people with overlapping shields so the force of any individual impact is spread across the group. Each shield bearer armed with an axe to reach over the wall and strike at the head of their opponents. Further people behind the shield-bearers with long handled axes/halberds etc. to provide further offence. Slow moving but it should be pretty damned effective against a disorganised horde. Plus it is easy to “disassemble” the wall in need of retreat/mopping up a few remaining stragglers.

    2. Olly says:

      Assuming you meant the Testudo and not the actual Roman squares technique. I realised immediately after posting that you could be referring to the general Roman infantry military strategy which indeed could be very strong against a horde of undead. The only issue I can see is that the number of people you would need to achieve this could be unachievably high.

  28. Khizan says:

    Sledgehammer, fire axe… both terrible choices for a melee weapon. Terrible. Why? Do me a favor real quick. Go get a sledgehammer or an axe. Now swing it accurately into a target the size of your head, at the height of your head. Now hand it to somebody else and have them swing it at a target the size of your head and the height of your head, that’s also maybe 3 feet away from your head. How comfortable are you with that?

    It’s harder than it looks, especially to get a kill and not just knock them down, and it takes forever to recover from the swing. I hope you never have to fight more than one walker at a time, John Henry. Or need to use it in a confined space. It’s also heavy and awkward to carry, and not very useful otherwise.

    My melee weapon of choice is going to be a solid steel framing hammer. An Estwing is a good example. A 25oz head and an 18 inch overall length give it the heft to quickly take down a walker. It doesn’t have a huge windup and it doesn’t have a lengthy recovery time after the swing, and if you’re struggling with a walker that’s got to grappling with you, it’s far easier for me to get it without the follow-through getting you.

    It’s easy to carry, and can be attached to a lanyard or worn in a tool belt. It’s also far more useful outside of walker-killing. Need to pull boards off a window? Put boards over one? Construct a barricade? Repair a fence? Good luck with the sledgehammer.

    Of course, that’s for carrying and general use as a close-quarters/travel weapon. If I’m actually intentionally hunting walkers with melee weapons (clearing a building, maybe?), I want somebody with a long-handled pitchfork/spear, to hold one in place, and somebody else with a killing weapon to actually kill it.

    1. Decent choices of weapon; agreed that big mallets and fire axes would be too clumsy for most to use effectively, and make working together harder. My approach to melee would be to strenuously avoid it. But I did some medievalist stuff for a while. My weapon of choice would be sword and shield, and I have them. There’s a reason people historically used swords more than any other melee weapon even though they were relatively expensive and hard to make: They work really well. If you want to kill people at hand-to-hand range, well, axes aren’t bad and spears are decent, but the main reason many people in the old days used a lot of axes and spears were, they were cheap and easy. Swords are tops if you can get them.

      And a shield is hugely useful. They are amazing defensively, and also let you get away with a somewhat heavier weapon or more powerful swing because you won’t be defending with the weapon, you’ll be blocking with the shield. If I had to pick just one of sword or shield knowing the opponent would be unarmed zombies, I might well go for the shield on its own (medium round) rather than the sword on its own. Just blocking properly would be likely to break arms; shields aren’t just good defensively, against unarmored opponents they’re pretty damned dangerous offensively.

      Also, I wouldn’t wander around with helm and armour (way too heavy and hot), but if I could get some to my chosen hideyhole I’d keep them around ready to hand. If the place were attacked and we had a team I’d get them to hold while I armoured up. With sword, shield, and full armour I could go up against fair numbers of zombies with a good deal of confidence.

      1. Khizan says:

        The sword is, imo, far less useful here.

        Firstly, zombies don’t bleed. They won’t die from a gut wound, or a chest wound. They require the brain to be destroyed, since a decapitated head can still bite. And so every killing blow has to crunch through the skull, which is very possible, and which will dull the edge rather rapidly, and risks it getting stuck or damaged.

        Secondly, unless you have a very expensive sword, the odds are very much against it being combat-grade and able to stand up to chopping through skulls repeatedly.

        Thirdly, swords are rather high maintenance. Got to be cleaned. Got to be sharpened. Have to worry about rust. Have to worry about damaging them.

        If you want to go medieval-style, I’d go with the mace/shield combo any day.

        1. Just for the record, my sword is combat grade (well, one of them–I have a couple others which are “thoroughly useless grade”). Don’t sharpen it too sharp to start with and it should be fine. If you know how to use your body in a sword blow it doesn’t need to be that sharp (and you don’t need to be that strong) to get the job done. Not that I ever got very good, but I learned the basics well enough to deliver fast accurate blows on opponents who don’t do defense. Half the time I’d probably go for legs and then do the actual skull-mashing with the shield once they were flopping around.

          I’m not really trained with a mace, and I prefer a slightly longer and less unbalanced weapon. From what I’ve seen of how people use maces in the SCA, to get rapid killing blows you need some serious arm strength–they sort of flip the things back and forth by rotating their forearms, and while they do somehow get the body involved in cranking the things around, still, it helps to be a bit of a heavyweight. Apparently medievalist mace-wielders have discovered a transverse band of muscle on the forearm that nobody normally develops enough to be able to see it. I’m not a heavyweight so I’d have to use the thing more clumsily. But I won’t say it would be a bad choice as long as you were running a shield with it.

  29. guiguibob says:

    My plan would be to organize as a nomad tribe. Move north to benefit from the anti-zombies effect of winter.

    Weapons would be slings and staff. Low maintenance and useful for other things. Bows and bludgeoning weapons. Things that are easily replacable.

    Winter clothing in winter and leather otherwise. The objective is low maintenance durable things. The majority of our time is going to be spent looking fot food.

    The nomadic lifestyle is because early agriculture offers less variety by time spent so more health issues. I would want solar panels as a way to produce easily movable electricity.

    We would build our camps away from urban areas. Moving every few weeks at first. Trading ith other survivors as we seek an empty territory.

  30. Vexus says:

    If it’s not too cheaty, I reside on the Isle of Wight off the coast of England, and I have all the things I need to survive a zombie apocalypse within 10 miles of my house. Firstly, as an Island I’m never more than a half day’s walking distance away from the coast and easy access to fishing vessels, yachts, and other vessels to allow me to escape or survive by fishing- though it wont be very successful fishing since the waters around here arent exactly teeming with the usual edible types of fish.

    If fishing or escape is a no-go, then my next objective would be to reach our local Castle, which is at the exact centre of the island. It’s also got a huge historical armoury. Whilst this may be going against the spirit of the rules, I feel its allowable since nothing projectile is likely to be in any working order- the cannons are filled with cement, the muskets have their locks broken, and the crossbows aren’t stringed. That said, its easy enough to restring a bow, and there’s enough melee weapons and armour to equip at least a small band. The high walls and sealable gate makes it ideal for fending off zombie attacks.

    As for food, the Castle is surrounded by farmland and isnt too far from the main town on the island either.

    But let’s say i can’t get to the castle or the coast. My third and final hope is the local gardening center, which has an assortment of usable tools aswell as seeds and instructions for their use. Even if I’m just confined to using my own garden, it should pay off once my tinned and scavenged food supplies run out.

  31. McNutcase says:

    I’m in the same boat as Shamus. Health issues that will rapidly prove fatal. Admittedly, not as DIRECTLY fatal as asthma, but I can’t sustain a pace of more than about a half-mile per day on foot. I could double that on one day, but then I’d need a day in agony to recover, and my screaming would draw the walkers in. Basically, I CAN’T out-run the walkers, so I’m hosed. That said, a reasonably fortifiable location, with the ability to grow crops, and I could not only survive, but be useful – so long as some of the crops we grow can be used as painkillers, and still leave me lucid enough to take on my assigned role as “repository of knowledge on how to get stuff done”. I’m most useful in the rebuilding stage of a zombie apocalypse, and unlikely to survive the stages before that. Sorry, everyone.

  32. Mister Angry Eyes says:

    Immediate death sounds plausible, but I have to admit the whole ‘mad despot thing really speaks to me.

    My ultimate end of the world plan is to form a tribe based on a loose interpretation of the Roman Empire, amass a huge collection of football uniforms (these will be used to fashion the tribe’s outfits/battle armor, you see) and set myself up as divine ruler. I will then go to war with disorganized and undisciplined soldiers unfamiliar with military formation, just like the real Romans! Oh yeah, when I’m Caesar, this world is mine.

  33. Isy says:

    Curl up and wait to die, because zombies in TWD aren’t zombies so much as the teleporting ninja hand of a malevolent god.

  34. arron says:

    Living as I do in the UK, I’ve seen enough apocalyptic fiction to have a sense of no matter what you do, you’re shafted basically. The BBC did several good dramas in the 1970s/1980s – Survivors, Threads and Day of the Triffids and the major issues (if Zombies cease to be a problem) are (1) population density, (2) scavengers, (3) groups claiming ‘legitimate’ governance of large areas/other groups of people/key resources and ruling through force and (4) secondary infections which will sweep through the remaining concentrations of populations in communes etc.

    The first (population density) is the first and most important. In a world where the population is very low, how do you ensure that humanity as a species has sufficient density to ensure that the human race can continue?

    The issues with collecting people together is that although you may concentrate people together, secondary disease and raiders (who will see organised groups as a source of free supplies when other food/medicine has run out) will actually kill more people than people on their own who don’t offer any probability of collected supplies. A single person may have nothing, but a community will usually collect supplies merely to keep people together.

    “Survivors” had the remaining total population of the UK post infection as 12000 people. Humanity might survive if all those lived as a single town/city, but chances are they would be stretched out across the UK, meaning that chances are you’d struggle to find survivors..assuming they’d not be dying from starvation or raider attacks before you meet. The other major issue is how do you replenish food and tools now that most of the humanity with those skills is now dead or zombies? So you need to start building facilities and retraining the survivors to be able to survive in a post-civilised age. You need a short term and long term plan.

    So my short term plan is:
    (1) Find secure and defendable shelter with land for growing food.
    (2) Secure supplies and defensive equipment to protect this shelter.
    (3) Build a means to be able to communicate with other groups (radio?)
    (4) Collect as many people as you can together.

    Long term plan is:
    (1) Train people in the necessary skills (First Aid, building, smithing, farming, animal husbandry, firearms etc) to survive.
    (2) Sow crops and reap food independent of supplies as they will run out eventually.
    (3) Try and remain under the radar of hostile groups who will destroy the community or attempt to commandeer manpower or supplies for themselves, leaving your group non-viable.

    1. I don’t think we need to worry too much about the human population not being dense enough. Most humans have a near unlimited supply of denseness.

    2. Shamus says:

      Hey! I saw threads back in the day. We watched it in school.

      Gut-wrenching stuff.

  35. newdarkcloud says:

    1.) In this scenario, assuming family or friends are dead, I would try to get a small group of 4-5 people together. Hopefully, these people would have a diverse enough set of skills, yet have enough in common that we could generally get along. Of course we’d have conflicts at times, since we are a group in a stressful situation. However, I would try my best to act as a mediator in those circumstances. If a guy like Larry shows up, I wouldn’t let him join because I’m an asshole like that. I’d likely take pity on someone like Ben though. Basically, as long as you can do something to contribute to the overall group, we’ll try to accommodate you. We want to make a budding community.

    2.)In this scenario, I’d likely take my mother’s Pistol and my Blackjack, unless I can find something sharper with about as much range and portability. I’d also like to think that I’d be able to craft a homebrew suppressor in desperate straights. The only problem I foresee is that despite living in the US, I have absolutely no experience using guns in real life. My only “training” is from what I know through osmosis, living in a pro-gun household in northern Delaware.
    I’d also bring along some basic supplies like a pot and pan, maybe take my Dad’s lighter and a few canned goods stored around here. I want to be prepare, but not weigh myself down.

    3.) Since I live in Delaware, that’s where I’d likely start out when the apocalypse hits. It’s a tricky area to live in this scenario it does get cold in the winter, so 24/7 farming is out of the question. I’d like to think that my group would be able to live and budget our food stores, but ideally like to find an area with more consistent weather. Maybe I could get buy by making a greenhouse that captures the heat and allows plant life to flourish.

    4.)I would likely dress as my usual self. I wear a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt with some sneakers. Likely I would also wear my hoodie over it in order to get some extra converge. I also have a pair of gloves that I could use and a backpack for item storage.

    5.)My long term plan is to basically find a good place to call home and re-discover agriculture mixed with a little hunting and gathering. We’ll need to eventually rebuild civilization, so I’d like to at least set the roots for a small colony or town. To that end, I’ll likely end up scavenging seeds from a greenhouse or something in order to start up. Hopefully, there will be enough food to scavenge from the vestiges of the “Old World” to last until we can get some farming started.

    I am sure my plan is flawed in some way. Feel free to openly mock and criticize it.

  36. Sydney says:

    I’d try to go it alone, wearing either leathers if I could find them or a thick judo gi (heavy, bite-proof cloth) if I couldn’t. Protection, but mobility.

    I live in Canada, so I’m heading north. As far north as I can get, so maybe the zombies freeze in the winter (I assume zombies are cold-blooded).

    For a weapon…I have no skill with firearms, so I think I’d look for a shovel. You can swing it or stab with it, and a heavy metal spade could crack a skull or shatter a spine. Good sturdy general-purpose melee, with a bit of length to it. Perfect.

    As for long-term…I dunno. If things got bad enough that I’d be gearing up and hauling north, my life as I know it is probably gone for good. I’d like to think I’d have the adaptability to carve out some new existence, but I’d probably end up finding and taking some easy way out.

  37. Mike says:

    First up, turn the water on in my house and fill up the bath, And pretty much everything else I can with water before the mains are cut. After that stockpile food on the second story/attic of my house and destroy the stairs. hold out up there for as long as I can. Probably manage around 2 weeks maybe 3 if the mains hold longer than I expect.

    After that I plan to Ghost around, see what sort of mess is left in the streets. Scavenge and see if I can get my hands on a crossbow. (Not likely) I’d never touch a gun. The noise would get me killed.

    After that I’d try and get a van running. fill up the back with enough petrol to get to the coast. As much as I hate to admit it a boat would be the best chance for me to get to an oil rig.

    Thats the plan anyway, get to an oilrig. They have water treatment plants and huge stockpiles of nonperishable food. Also thats not exactly common knowledge so survivor overflow wouldn’t be too likely.

    Probably not the best plan tbh but Its the best I’ve got.

  38. ehlijen says:

    1) Yes. I’ll need to sleep and sometimes otherwise just need a second pair of eyes to cover me while doing something potentially dangerous. Ideally I’d start off with friends, but if that’s not an option, I’d take whoever I can find.
    If a Larry joins, I’m out. Leaving with a fair share of supplies. If a Ben joins, keep him, but don’t assign him important duties alone until he shapes up. In fact, I’d suspect I’d be a Ben. I’m not a survivalist Guru.

    2) First up some midweight tool that can be used as a weapon. Axe, spade, crowbar or hammer (in that order of preference). Belt if ‘safe’, in hand otherwise. Guns are only worth it if I can find an ample supply of ammo. Pistols over rifles, as they are lighter and I can’t aim long range anyway. Otherwise I’d try to fashion a bow or crossbow if given time and materials.

    3) Does NA have what germans call Halligen? Ie tiny islands that flood with the tides? If so, try to get a small boat and live in a lighthouse on one of those. Not being connected to the mainland at the best of times is some protection and every 12 hours or so there’s a tide to wash the worst that makes it onto the island away. And yes, the boat would be for fishing.
    If that’s not an option, try for a farm out in the country. The further away from anything, the better. The aussie outback would be ideal, not sure if the midwest gets that isolated in the US.
    And I’d prefer colder climate zones to warmer: it allows wearing more and if the frost doesn’t kill them, at least the snow should hinder them. It does add the need for firewood though…

    4) Thick winter clothes/shipboard rain clothes. Maybe a pushbike helmet. But nothing more restrictive to the field of vision. TWD zombies are slow but sometimes silent, so good periphal vision is needed. A backpack that can be released quickly, just in case you find something useful.

    5)Longterm it has to be fishing or farming. Scavenging is not a long term anything (things will run out or spoil) and land wildlife is not sufficient to feed many people now, let alone once a few million zombies scour the woods for food. Plus, unlike wolves and boars, (most) fish and plants don’t fight back, so it’d be safer.

  39. Ryan says:

    Basically do what the St. Johns did, minus the pointless cannibalism. Head towards a rural farming community, make myself useful when I get there.

  40. Xine says:

    I live in South Florida, I guess my best bet would be to head to the ocean, It’s not even that long a drive from my house. I suppose the keys could be ideal too if we were able to get rid of the bridges leading there, then get rid of all infected in key west and life can go on as normal more or less.

    1. Hitchmeister says:

      Wait. Aren’t Key West and “life as normal” almost diametrically opposed concepts?

  41. Lazlo says:

    My plan is simple: Team up with Les Stroud and do whatever he’s doing.

    1. harborpirate says:

      I like that plan!

      Step 1: Find Les Stroud.
      Step 2: Get to remote, wilderness location.
      Step 3: Survive by doing whatever Les tells me to do.

      Bad news: everyone that knows Les probably has the same plan.

      And Les’s plan is probably:

      Step 1: Bug out before anyone figures out where I’ve gone.
      Step 2: Make absolutely sure Bear Grylls does not know where to find me. That guy will just get injured jumping over a waterfall or some stupid thing and then I’ll have to carry him and his busted leg. Plus he’ll just poison himself eating a live scorpion or trying to catch a snake with his bare hands or eating some too-long-dead animal and then I’ll have to nurse him back to heath with my native plant knowledge and then he’ll just get Giardia from drinking right out of that stream. DAMMIT BEAR.
      Step 3: Lol, I’m survivorman. I’m one of the few guys in the developed world ideally prepared for it to end.

  42. Chard says:

    This sounds like fun. I’ll give it a shot.

    1. I’d probably try to keep to a small group. No more than five trusted members. To keep constructive thinking and socializing up, and crazy people down.
    2. Considering I live in Sweden, there aren’t that many guns around, but as stated earlier in this thread, there are hunters. One might get lucky. I would probably stick to a crowbar or something reliable and effective like that.
    3. Let’s assume I wake up “somewhere” in Sweden, somewhere I haven’t been, but still within the borders of my nation. I would head to my old family home, deep in western forest of Sweden. It’s deep enough in the forest to be concealed from most of civilization, and north enough to get really cold during the winters. I’m fairly good at following the sun and the stars for direction, and I can walk to it right now from where I am from memory(a trip of about 350 km, so it’ll take some time, but I know the way).
    4. We’re assuming it’s winter(because as of writing, it is). It’s currently -14 C(6.8 F) outside my window, so layers is a must. Lot’s of light layers to the temperature up and still have some momentum. I can get pretty far on what I have at home, but I would probably do well to get to a wilderness store somewhere along the way.
    5. As previously stated, I’m headed to the forest. So I’m going to hide away in the wilderness and hunt, fish and forage. There are a lot of lakes close by, and I know the forest pretty well, so my chances for surviving the winter is… okay. Come spring, I would start to fortify the place up, and possibly try to get in touch with the smaller communities around, to get a bead on how bad the situation is for the rest of the world.

  43. Doctor Broccoli says:

    1) I don’t think people would turn into sociopaths the very instant the apocalypse happens. I think it would be very well possible to just live in a group without a Larry or a Ben screwing everything up.
    So yeah, I’d go in a group. I’d say the bigger the better, provided we can find enough food.

    2) I live in the Netherlands where there isn’t really an abundance of guns. I’d probably arm myself with something like a crowbar or a fire axe until I can get a gun from a police station or a military base.

    3) Ideally I’d go to my parents house. It’s close to a forest, which has animals we can hunt. It’s close to a military base, which I’m guessing is fairly defendable and probably has guns and other stuff we can use. It’s close to a bunch of farms. It’s within driving distance (about 20 minutes) of water, so if we want to leave and get a boat we can totally do so. In addition to all this, the average age there is pretty damn high. I’m assuming old people don’t make for the most dangerous zombies.

    4) If I can get my hands on military clothing (like, the kind soldiers wear when they go to war) I’d probably wear that. Sturdy, long-sleeved and camouflaged, that’s really all you need.

    5) Fishing, growing crops and hunting are all options. I’d probably just try to get as many people into the group as possible and get a farm or two up and running. If necessary, we’ll send out groups to scavenge nearby towns.

  44. Protocol95 says:

    1. Seek out a group, going alone seems suicidal for a number of reasons to me such as how I can’t keep watch when i’m asleep. If I get a Larry i’ll try to be diplomatic about things but stand my ground. If I get a Ben i’ll try to educate them on how to survive competently.
    2. If I can i’ll try to get something big like a fire axe but I could probably get some use out of some smaller tools. If there’s a police station my ultimate goal is to get there as there’s probably some decent gear.
    3. Go for the basic shelter ideas like a gas depot ir police station. No fancy stuff like Dams. Might need to clear them out but they would probably not be completely picked clean and I imagine easy to fortify.
    4. Shirt and a jacket tucked in with jeans prefferably.
    5. That will vary on where I end up but I think I want to stick to scavenging for the short term and start clearing out and fortifying neighbouring areas and grow crops if I can claim an open area.

    My head gets a bit too into this sort of stuff.

  45. Kimagure says:

    I’ve heard that there are no zombies in Pacific Playland. It’s completely zombie-free…

  46. Fawstoar says:

    Grab nearest car upon outbreak, book it to Canada (border is easy to cross, esp. if all guards are zombies). Head for a small town like Canmore, surrounded by mountains and hopefully with plenty of firearms. Camp in the nearby woods by night, loot the small town by day. Band together with other survivors (since this is rural Alberta, people probably have a better idea of how to survive than I do, being a Massachusettsian suburban-raised dude) and eventually try to retake portions of the town center.

  47. Thomas says:

    If I weren’t to just shoot myself, I just realised, I live in Wales so I’ve actually got a decent chance of surviving.

    1. Very low population density. I’d head up to Powys which only has 25 people per square kilometre and most of those people are old. Since zombies only shamble and Powys is a quiet mountainous place. Almost 0 zombies and rural so lots of unaffected communities. There’s only 1,500 deaths a year so low infection vectors

    2. Very bare mountains with very little tree cover. Zombies would be as plain as day (can zombies even use a stile?)

    3. Wales has the most Castles per square metre in the whole of Europe. Lots of suits of armour (lets see a zombie bite through that). Lots of really secure places with moats, thick walls and narrow choke points.

    4. Sheep.

    I reckon I could do quite well. Raid a local camping store, the town castle museum, head out into the country. Gradually collect survivors (a lot of the farmers will be unaffected) clear out a small town, start building up resources and learning how to survive independently again.

    The only problem is trying to find 500 people to stop humanity from dying of inbreeding

  48. Nytzschy says:

    1 Get a gun and lots of ammunition. In Texas, this should be easy. Heck, in the United States this should be easy. There are more guns than people here, and there are a lot less people to get upset about me taking their guns. A crowbar would be nice, too. In fact, I’ve always wanted to loot a Home Depot. Can you imagine?

    2 Get batteries, lots and lots of batteries, a flash light, a radio, and more batteries.

    2a check the radio to see if its batteries are inserted correctly.

    3 Go north by any means possible, gathering food and winter clothing along the way.

    4 Wait out the winter somewhere remote and hope the zombies are killed or incapacitated by freezing temperatures.

    5 Go to the nearest large city and try to make contact with other groups of survivors. Hope the zombies are killed or incapacitated by freezing temperatures.

    6 What do you mean, the zombies aren’t killed or incapacitated by freezing temperatures?! Oh shi””

    One thing I’ve never seen addressed in zombie stories: nuclear power plants. I assume they would be some of the last places to be affected, being of necessity quite secure facilities, but I do wonder how many would undergo accidents, meltdowns, etcetera, simply because no one is around to take care of them.

    1. Thomas says:

      I think they’re designed so they’d shut down if no-ones taking care of them. And once the reactions stopped it’d take a lot to get it started again (I think it takes 3 days minimum to start up a plant. And I might be thinking of coal and nuclear is longer). So it wouldn’t really be much of a threat.

      Maybe if someone does a Chernobyl and decides to shut off all the safety features immediately before being overtaken by the zombie apocalypse

    2. Dev Null says:

      Funny story. Turns out, the only reason zombies are stupid is that their brains are overheating. Who knew?

  49. Jenson says:

    1. I keep my eye out for people, but I generally stay on my own. If I do find some people, then I might stick around. Still would try to keep it small (five people at most). If I find a big group, then I’ll try to get it to split and take different areas of the state to scavenge/clear zombies out of. Vermont’s a small state, and not very populated. So we should be able to clear out the walkers from many of the smaller towns. When that’s done, we’ll form larger groups and go into the more populated areas.

    As for the criteria of people, well obviously we’d want a decent person who’s not prone to panicking and doesn’t have an attitude problem. If someone like Ben joins, well I won’t abandon or kill him/her, but I won’t trust them with anything big. At least not yet. Give them small responsibilities, build up their confidence, and gradually give them more responsibility. If someone like Larry joins (or tries to), well I explain that we need to stay focused and not yell at each other. And if they can’t keep themselves under control, they’ll be kicked out. As for bandits, since where I’m going has a large population of older people, bandits shouldn’t be much of a problem. But if I do come across some, I’ll try to avoid them. If I can’t, try to reason or cut a deal. Failing that, well then it’ll most likely be kill or be killed.

    2. For weapons I’d carry a knife, steel baseball bat, pistol, and Hunting Rifle. I’d carry the pistol in a holster, put a sling on the rifle so I can carry it on my back, knife in a sheath on my leg and carry the bat in my hands. As for other gear, some magazines in a small phanny-pack (what? It’s the apocalypse, doesn’t matter what I wear, it works). and a backback for some supplies and salvage. Should be able to get around fine to places with that setup.

    3. Vermont. It’s a small state, not much of a population, lots of animals to hunt (hell, at my house we get flocks of wild turky and some wild dear that go through our back and front yard every other week or so), and lots of farms to settle on. You also don’t need a license to get a gun, since most people either live on farms and need them for the various animals intent on mucking it up and people who live off hunting. It’s also pretty hilly/mountainous, which should help impede the walkers. Or make it harder for them to chase you. Plus, in the winter the freezing temperatures should weaken any exposed zombies. Freezing cold takes its toll on meat. As does intense heat, which Vermont can have in the summer. As for how I’d dress… jeans, a shirt(long-sleeve or short sleeve depending on the weather) a long-sleeve leather jacket with a hood, gloves and boots. That’ll be standard. the jacket and gloves should help stop bites on the upper body, and the boots will stop any ankle-biting zombies who are crawling around. For winter, it’ll be all that and a heavy jacket. On particularly hot days it’ll be jeans, boots, gloves, and carry the jacket by putting the hood up but not putting my arms in the sleeves. Should keep my back protected and keep me relatively cool.

    Long term plan is to find a small amount of people and settle on one of the farms. Since lots of people here farm, there’s a decent chance I can find someone who knows how, if not I could also do this on my own. I know somethings, not much but I’ll be able to sustain myself. Fortify the farm with large fences and go out every now and then for supplies/hunting/walker extermination. Long-term plan is to gradually clear out the immediate area of walkers, get the farm working. then slowly go through houses in the rural areas. When that’s all done, I’ll start going into the more populated areas.

    And that’s the plan I just thought of. Probably not perfect, but hopefully it’ll do.

  50. swenson says:

    So, assuming I can’t just choose where I start from… let’s assume I’m in my home state of Michigan.

    1) I would definitely try to find people to join up with. I’d have to think in the long term here. If there’s no reason to believe the zombies will die out soon, then we need to figure out how to coexist with them. And one person isn’t going to be able to live in the long-term on their own. So we’ve got to work together, figure out some means of food production (scavenging is a very short-term solution) and protection, all that jazz. I would want to make sure people are decent, of course, and if I was thinking sufficiently ahead I’d like to form close bonds with the people I believe I can trust, so when a horrible/crazy person shows up, we can stand together to get rid of them.

    2) This is the real reason I wanted to start in Michigan… weapons would be fairly easy to come by. Guns are kind of a big deal here. If I were to break into just about any country house, I almost guarantee I could find a gun or two. Whatever weapon is most effective against zombies, I’d want to take that, of course… assuming I had cases for easy carrying, I’d try to take at least a couple of long guns (shotguns? I’m not totally familiar with the Walking Dead universe, are they more effective than rifles?) and a handgun or two. If I had the luxury of choice, I’d pick guns that had common ammunition as well. And a melee weapon of some type.

    If I had to limit this to “what can you carry in your arms”, I’d take a melee weapon (an axe, perhaps? Would double as a useful tool) and a handgun, at the very least. But a long gun would be better, as it’d be better for hunting.

    3) So we’re in Michigan. The answer for where to go is quite simple: north. Fewer people are there. Those who ARE there have more guns, which means if they’re dead, you can get some weapons easily. There’s plenty of animals to hunt, and enough of a population (at least south of the bridge) that you can still do some scavenging as well. Not sure how zombies fare in the winter, but you’d have enough wood to keep yourself warm, and if zombies are hurt by the cold, that’s a nice bonus. At the same time, summer is also warm and long enough to grow some supplemental crops.

    My basic plan would be: find an isolated cabin with a well, stockpile food and wood, and try to stick it out.

    4) I’d try to scrounge up some Carhartts. Overalls if I could get them, their work pants if I can’t. Again, this is Michigan, so this wouldn’t be hard. Not only do these go over regular pants (offering extra warmth in the winter), but they’re very, very sturdy and would last me a long time. For shirts, I’d try to pick thicker shirts of sturdy material. I’d also want to have layers of clothing (a tanktop, a T-shirt, a sweatshirt, a jacket) rather than thicker clothing (just a long-sleeved shirt and a really warm winter coat). Keeps you warmer, and then you’re set for summer as well. For footwear, boots. Not dressy boots, not winter boots, but work boots. And two pairs of socks. And maybe long underwear or tights to go under my jeans, which will go under my Carhartts. Also two pairs of underwear at least. :P

    5) My basic plan would be this: me and a small group of people who trust one another would travel to the northern Lower Peninsula of Michigan. We would find an isolated cabin (or a couple of cabins near each other, depending on the size of the group), where we’d set up camp. Ideally, the cabin would have a wood-burning stove that could be used both for heat and for cooking, an outhouse, and a well… basically, a cabin that started off not having electricity, so it would already be set up for that sort of survival.

    After clearing out any zombies we find in the area, we’d scavenge for food and useful items from nearby towns or cabins. We’d also send out hunters with our guns to try to get us deer, turkeys, whatever they could find. This meat would be smoked, dried, pickled, frozen, whatever it took to preserve it. If it was early enough, we’d also try to get seeds and plant gardens in any clearings in the woods. The vegetables/fruits we harvested could be canned, which is pretty easy, or frozen (preferable for certain foods). We’d also need to stockpile wood. And a lot of it.

    Then… survive. Eventually we’d have to try to find other groups of survivors, but the important thing is that we’re capable of surviving, before we try to rebuild society.

    Oh, double points if we’re near one of the lakes, by the way, or a nice river. Fishing is always good. Triple points if we get over to one of the Manitou Islands or Mackinac Island or something, where zombies probably can’t reach (once you get rid of all of the ones on the islands, of course…), because then you’d basically be safe forever. And on Mackinac Island, if you get too desperate for food, you can always eat the horses…

    1. swenson says:

      I forgot to mention this for yesterday, but we’d need a plan for disposing of bodies as well. Burning them should work, right? If not, we’d have to, like, dismember them or something. Horrible, but necessary. And hey, cremation is a time-honored traditional way to get rid of bodies in a lot of cultures, right? We can just pretend we’re Vikings.

      1. Dev Null says:

        I suggested this myself, but on second thought… Burning them _would_ be pretty horrible, and also draw a lot of attention to yourself and waste a lot of valuable fuel. If headshots stop them – which has to be about the most consistent piece of lore across all versions of zombies I’ve ever seen – then crushing the skulls of your dead with a rock should do the trick. Still fairly horrible, but less immediately smelly.

  51. Keldoclock says:

    I’m going to make the presumption that I still am in NYC when the apocalypse happens, because theres so many different kinds of locale that you can’t really plan for every one.

    I think the best plan for someone in a very dense urban area is to go to a skyscraper and destroy the first set of stairs, replacing them with a retractable ladder. Once you’ve gone through every floor and made sure it is safe, you can set up some tarps and barrels to collect rainwater on the roof, and loot a plant nursery or similar for soil, fertilizer, and 5 gallon buckets in which to grow crops. If you can manage to keep electricity on, you are in a basically ideal situation for setting up a aquaponics system. Now that you and your family are safe and can produce at least some of your own food, you can set up a small business reloading bullets for other survivors in exchange for food. It’s surprisingly easy to create ammunition, and you can re-use a brass cartridge 3 or 4 times before it starts to crack!

    The ideal weapons would be things like spears, crossbows, and firearms. The best weapon is one that does not require much training or practice to use, and allows you to safely attack a zombie from a distance.

    Clothing for the apocalypse would probably be tight-fitting, warm, and have lots of pockets. Something like one of those synthetic/wool hiking base layers under tight-fitting cargo pants and a sport shirt (like a dress shirt but less formal, with 2 pockets on the chest) and sneakers would probably be the best you could hope for short of military load bearing vests.

  52. Sabrdance (MatthewH) says:

    While I enjoy a good zombie plan as much as the next guy (I’d head north to the Ohio River, it’s closest, and then try to float down to the Mississippi -if I had a powered craft I’d head north to St. Louis, but I can’t imagine getting up the Missouri or much farther up the Mississippi without a resupply, so New Orleans or Baton Rouge might be better bets to find a community to join), I am unpersuaded that civilization would really fall apart so much. There would be some pretty major adjustments and people would need to figure out how to grow food locally since the roads will probably not work as well, but I can imagine something approximately like NBC’s Revolution, without the power-mad warlords.

    We’d just elect them in the US.

  53. Tse says:

    I’m in a city with 2-3 million people. I would either join the survivors (with this population density I don’t think there will be multiple small groups, just a huge one) or die before I manage to. The biggest problem would be the risk of starvation, dehydration and disease. If I was put in a leading position I would have the group scavenge what it can and get out of the city, the population outside the capital and the few big cities is so low that walkers wouldn’t be a problem. Since we have a lot of fertile land, starting a farming community wouldn’t be as hard as most other plans. Oh, and we would raid some military stockpile, getting Kalashnikovs for everybody, though the group would get its hands on multiple AKs before leaving the capital by raiding a residential district or two.

  54. Hyrum says:

    I happen to live in the gun-friendly south, so I would get together with my friends, combining our respective weapons together. We’d probably have a couple bolt-action rifles, a shotgun, machetes, and a few swords and battle axes(got some medieval anachronist friends) Then, we’d wait for a while in our tiny town of 700, all the while preparing to depart by gathering plants and hunting and drying what we caught. Hopefully with our small isolated town, the people would stick together at least for a time. If the number of zombies gets too bad, I’d leave with family and friends. Might be impractical with a large group but you can’t leave them behind. Then we would gather up some farming supplies(seeds, shovels, ect) and get farther away from the cities. We’d then make a living in the psuedo-wilderness hunting and hopefully being able to plant crops. There’s far more edible plants in the wilderness than most people suppose. As the winters in the south don’t exactly get cold we should be able to make a living. We’d wear layers of warm clothing that we could take off in the heat. We’d probably have everyone cut their hair short.

  55. arron says:

    There’s a flash game here “Rebuild2” if you want the experience of trying rebuild civilisation during the midst of a zombie crisis. I’ve played it before and it’s good fun :)

    There’s also mobile versions for iPad and Android if you’d like to attempt to fend off the undead on the train.. :)

    http://www.kongregate.com/games/sarahnorthway/rebuild-2

  56. I suppose one major question is, how much of the population gets suddenly dead at the beginning? How many are left? If there are a goodly number of people still alive it becomes less a matter of isolated survivor groups and more of rebuilding communities.

  57. KMJX says:

    I’d stay where I live right now: I could kill the entire Z population in less than a day, and would have quite enough supplies for a lifetime, considering I’m in the mountains and know how to live off nature.
    I guess I’d make a nearby power plant my base.

    The main problems would be finding a suitable weapon, and deciding whom to save, if there was anyone who could be saved.

    Main location would be hard to decide, there are many different places with different benefits: isolation, lots of clean water springs, nice sunny places for farming, or good hunting grounds.

    Then again, everything is relatively close, so… I’d have to get into hiking xD

  58. krellen says:

    Behold! The Don’t-Get-Eaten-By-Zombies-Inator!

    It’s funny because that probably is Heinz’s zombie plan.

    On topic: my zombie plan is to die. Presumably to end up one of the zombies, since I don’t have any tools on hand to ensure otherwise.

    1. Paul Spooner says:

      I was really looking forward to reading your zombie plan!

      At least it was concise?

  59. Eljacko says:

    I live right in the middle of Chicago, so the first step of my plan should probably be to get the hell out of Chicago. I live near a CostCo where I can get my hands on resources in bulk. I have a bunch of handy steak knives at home, so those might be good for weapons, though I’m quite weak. If I could spare the trip to Dick’s Sporting Goods then I might be able to get my hands on a crossbow too.

    After making the necessary preparations I would head for Lake Michigan, steal a boat from the marina, and boat my way to Lake Ontario.

    I wear jeans, loafers, a button down shirt, and a traveling vest every day. I can’t imagine I would deviate much from that. I might bring hiking boots instead of loafers, but I actually get around better in the latter, so hiking boots would only be an encumbrance if I wasn’t actually going to navigate any mountains. I would wear my overcoat too. I know it’s long and flowing, which is a weakness, but I need to stay warm because it’s the middle of winter and I’ll be traveling on the lake for a long time.

    Ideally I’ll land somewhere around Toronto. My hope is that Toronto, where it’s much, much colder than Chicago, will be relatively unaffected by the zombies. If it turns out not to be safe in Toronto then I’ll see if I can find out which direction the disease actually came from and go in the opposite direction.

    If I’m quite lucky then the disease actually will have come from the south and I’ll have a chance of making it to Quebec City, which is much more defensible than Toronto.

    1. Peter H. Coffin says:

      Sadly, Tronno’s climate is damned near indistinguishable from Chicago’s. Nearly the same latitude (okay, it’s the same as Sheboygan), same “windward side of 2-trillion-gallon heatsink” micro climate patterns. It’s just 90 degrees clockwise.

  60. Kobold Artificer says:

    Here’s a list of thoughts about this situation in the order I thought of them:

    My personal equipment, clothes, weaponry, and weapon policy:
    -You specified basic weapons so I’ll operate on the assumption that any pistol is a tier above basic. I’d go for some sort of blunt instrument as a weapon, like a baseball bat or lead pipe. I wouldn’t use anything heavy (like a fire-axe) because throwing that weight around would put me off-balance in combat. Ideally I would want a medium-sized crowbar (think Half-Life) as it could be used as both a bludgeoning weapon and a tool to get into buildings, boxes, etc.
    -Leather would be ideal as armor because it would be good low weight protection against the natural elements, artificial elements (like broken glass and barbed wire), and resistance against zombie teeth. It’s also tight so it wouldn’t get caught on things like bushes, zombie hands, and my own feet. Also leather would be viable armor in terms of time, despite its tendency to dry out. If leather isn’t available I would opt for jeans and a hoodie, perhaps dye them for camouflage? Anyway, I’d wear boots and fingerless gloves as part of both outfits.
    In addition to clothes I’d also shave my head or cut it really short so I couldn’t be grabbed by the hair.
    -I’d need some sort of container to carry my supplies around in. A regular backpack seems too easy to grab with all those straps, adjustable strings, and what not. I’d probably go with a messenger bag tightened to be as close to my body as possible, to minimize grab-able-ness. Mobility would very important so I’d emphasize on traveling lite, only carrying things like food, water ,maps, a compass, and Swiss Army Knife (assuming I could find all these things).
    -If I came across a gun I’d take it with me. If it is something small like a pistol I’d probably carry it everywhere with me at all times (safety on of course) for emergency use only*. If it where something like a bow or crossbow I’d keep it with me after I got familiar with how it works of course. If it were something larger, like an average shotgun or rifle, I would only keep it with me if I had a means to carry it, like a strap or holster. If not I’d lock it away in where ever I’m hiding out. There are exceptions: If I came across a LMG I’d definitely store that away even if it had a strap because it would most likely be too heavy and unwieldy to use effectively in the field so to speak. I wouldn’t even touch explosive stuff like grenades and rocket launchers because they are just too unpredictable. I wouldn’t even store these because of the risk of damaging my base, not to mention the risk of blowing myself/my companions up.
    -Ammunition conservation would be one of the things I stress with my party.
    -Any extra equipment not being used would serve as supplies for trade.

    *Emergencies would be things like bandit attacks, combat with other people who have guns, and large zombie hoards.

    Shelter, defenses, food, & supplies:
    -I wouldn’t be too picky about shelter in reality. But in an ideal situation I’d want a farm. I thought what the St. John family had was a good idea but I think they went about it all wrong. For example, you pointed out that they would constantly need fuel for an electric fence so I would substitute something much simpler: a punji stick trench. Think about it, low maintenance, easily replaceable parts, and it would be more difficult than a fence for bandits to get past.
    -In addition to the trench, I’d have a barricade/fence around the inner edge of the trench to slow down say… bandits who have built a bridge, or zombies who fell into the trench and are climbing back out on the other side. Yes I’m aware it would take significant time to dig out a trench like that and build those defenses, even with some friends to help, but I think the security would be worth it.
    -On the farm itself we’d most likely grow crops for food. If someone knew how to take care of farm animals and assuming the farm has a barn then maybe we’d keep a cow/goat around for milk and chickens for eggs. If an animal got sick it would be quarantined as quickly as possible. We’d do everything we could, even try to find medicine if it’s not too dangerous. But realistically the animal would probably die. :(
    -I’d also build a separate shed for surplus ammo/supply storage and a shed for fuel/alcohol storage. Because what if the house caught fire? I wouldn’t want everything going up in flames. Plus having separate places to store possible trade goods would make access to them more convenient. But convenient doesn’t mean easy, I’d make sure to keep them under lock and key and have someone I trust guarding them (don’t want Ben getting into them.)
    -Water would be collected from rain, condensation traps, as well as any other nearby water source.
    -Alcohol and cigarettes would be kept for trade use.
    -Additional food/supplies would be acquired by hunting/trapping animals, trade with friendly camps, and scavenging.

    Group politics, crime, & dealing with other people:
    -I know that I would get far too lonely to be a lone wolf. So I would probably want to form a party. I would encourage people to speak up about any concerns they have, but if it came down to it I would be the leader. I would try to be as diplomatic as possible not just with the party, but also with any other survivors we come across. But if I met a Larry/Lily I would attempt to undermine them politically. But if they tried to kill me the I’d kill them right back.
    -Any dead would be decapitated after death, no exceptions. I’d even tell my team to decapitate the dead even if I object to it at that time.
    -Any scientist that wants to do experiments with zombies will be labeled an Umbrella employee and will be barred from entering our camp as well as trading with us. He will also be told to leave the area or be met with deadly force.
    -Any friendly group will be invited to trade with us regardless of race, religion, etc.
    -Someone caught stealing minor stuff (small amounts of ammo, cigarettes, alcohol) will receive a warning. Anyone stealing major stuff like (medicine, weapons, armor) without good reason will be exiled. Murder will result in death, unless it is justified. Pedophiles and rapists will be exiled.
    -Alcohol and cigarette use is prohibited because they are major trade items. If pressed by a majority of the group then I would allow rationed use.
    -Taking on new people and having children would have to be a group decision, as well as the consequences for unapproved child birthing.
    -My personal weapon policy at the top will extend to my group, unless they convince me otherwise.

    1. Merrill says:

      Yes, I think I put too much thought into this.

  61. N/A says:

    Grab my sword (lovely thing, replica but properly-forged and even has an edge, even though it shouldn’t) and put my trust in a brisk walking pace. There’s a fishing supplies store just down the street, we live in a coastal town and dad’s a sailor, so make for the port, grab a yacht and get used to seafood, I guess.

    After that… Dunno. My plan really only covers the initial “oh god the world is ending!!!” phase. The rest will depend on how things look once we’re off-shore.

  62. 1. Do you seek out people to form a team, or do you go all lone wolf? If you do travel with people, what criteria do you use for choosing companions? If you join a group, what do you do when a Larry joins, or a Ben?

    Semi-solo, no Larry’s or Ben’s, most likely not a Kenny, etc.
    I might accept a Carley, she may not have any clue about batteries, but the way she handles a gun is impressive, then again she was unable to reload it when it mattered so…
    I like brains (pun intended), so it would likely be a female that was intelligent. And travel as a pair. This behavior is not unique to to humans but common with many species.

    2. What kind of weapons do you carry? How do you carry them? What other gear do you lug around? Limit yourself to gear that people are normally able to obtain in these stories. So, no tanks. I realize that this seems sort of arbitrary, but “IMMA GET AN F-15 FIGHTER JET LOLOLOL!!!!” seems like cheating. Let's assume military bases are fortified and you're warned off by snipers. Stick to stuff that's available in public places: Stores, homes, schools, etc. No secret bunkers, no government research facilities, no military facilities.

    A pair of “terrain” bikes (pedal powered obviously) for getting around fast, possibly with a double sidebag on the back, water bottle holder, and maybe a small bag at the front, and solid tires if possible (i.e. no air tires).
    A semi-automatic pistol (with a “reflex sight” if possible) and a semi-automatic rifle with a good analog scope.
    Small backpack, and a small sidepouch in the belt. Gun in holster and rifle on back. “enough” ammo for a “while”, for each, and more at the “base”.
    A pair of walkies. a pair of pocket laser pointers for silent signaling, some spare batteries.
    Always some food and water and medical supplies in the backpack, ALWAYS.
    Some rechargeable batteries and a “USB”-wall charger for the batteries in case power sources are found.
    Extra pair of shoes and some clothes in the bike rear bags, and some food and water and medical supplies.
    Some ammo (or other stuff) in the small belt pouch, and maybe some in the front bag on the bike.
    A hunting knife in the belt, and a pocket knife in a pocket somewhere.
    Lighter and matches and some more medical stuff in various other pockets, a energy bar or something in another, a compass in another (mirrored type if possible).
    A crowbar, a hammer and some standard screwdrivers (flat/philips) in the rear bags, cutting knife and wire cutters, magnifying glass, some pencils, pencil sharpener, eraser and some paper.
    Blankets and something that can double as a pillow and hand warmer when not (the tube thing you stick your hands inside)
    Cut fingertip gloves, and thicker fingered gloves. Some extra (thicker) socks and sweater, maybe some thin inner pants (the kinds that skiers/winter sportsmen use a lot).
    A hat/or a jacket with a adjustable hood (or both).
    A few rolls of gaffa/stage tape. (should have been almost first on the list really)
    Sunglasses, tube of suntan cream. “Winter” scarf.
    A basic cellphone (no smartphone) and a android tablet (hence USB enabled wall charger earlier) and USB power cable. Tablet for staying “modern” where there is power (and by the off-chance WiFi) and cellphone in case some shit actually works.

    Basically a micro-house-on-wheels, probably a lot of other small things that others can come up with. It may sound like a lot (and it is) but with the (3 bags on) bike it’s doable.

    3. If you're in North America. then where will you go? There's a lot of territory here, and Tampa is pretty much a different planet compared to Anchorage. I’d go close to one of the really giant cities, outskirts of New York or LA, or DC, Vegas, etc.
    Staying in the outskirt is safer and it’s easier to notice if something is amiss, but you will most likely not lack resources any time soon (if you stay alive obviously).

    4. How do you dress?
    Kinda answered in point 2 actually, what you carry also includes what you wear, people tend to forget that “little” fact.
    But to elaborate, loose but well fitting clothes (allows fast and unrestricted movement), 2 layers during summer/warmer parts of the year, 3 layers (or thicker clothes) during the winter parts.
    Two pair of shoes, ones that breathe and ones that are sealed for snow/water use.
    Thin fingerless gloves that fit inside thicker gloves. (or special gloves that are both in one)

    5. What's your long-term plan? Do you look for a boat and live at sea? Do you look for a farm and try to grow crops? Do you look for some suburbs and scavenge? Do you head for the wilderness and hunt?
    Point 1 and 2 and 3 and 4 kinda reveal a little of the “plan”. But to finish off.
    Check now and again in certain areas (if on longer journeys) if cellphone reception is there or not, and if WiFi (or ethernet even) is available or not. If there is power it’s likely that internet is working (at least partially) which means you can check news sites or wikipedia or TwentySided “(Shamus tweet: Yep folks, this is the apocalypse, the alien virus is here!)”.

    If near a major city and there is an island (and available boat), then using that as the basecamp is a pretty smart idea. Provided you check the if the darn zombies can swim or not first obviously.

    Also I’m not sure if I have mentioned this before, but there is a really great CYOS game here http://www.choiceofgames.com/zombies/
    It’s a free web game and has some re-playability even (more so than The Walking Dead game), your choices can affect the story a lot.

  63. Steve C says:

    I don’t think you got the essence of Larry and Lily’s plan above…

    Larry and Lilly: Don’t let anyone join your group. Kill anyone in your group that maybe, possibly, might be a threat to the group. Feel betrayed when you are the last one left.

  64. Cannibalguppy says:

    I live in norway in a small community and most people i know hunt so the guns-zombie ratio is so high the zombies could never really be a threat. The only real threat is the cold and food but fishing is easy and hunting is just as easy and heavy warm clothing combined with simple shelter and a bonfire keeps you safe.

    If nothing else you can light a fire in houses and houses in Scandinavia is generally built very strong to resist the huge amount of snow and shitty weather so fortifying it would also be easy. And during winter the zombies would freeze to blocks of ice and i would not so foraging would be perfectly safe and groceries would not go stale during winter. Summer is another story but again guns, fishing and thick walls tend to be ok.

    I know some basic survival stuff(being a hunter) so i dont think it would be as bad, and considering the small population i dont think the zombievirus could spread faster than it would be stopped. The capital is fucked but thats not the only place to live.

  65. Alex says:

    1. I would immediately try to get my hands on some people with farming knowledge and others with a wide variety of skill sets.
    2. Raid local stores for weaponry and food. Take only weaponry that use universal types of ammunition/melee weapons with long reach.
    3. Start heading to the northwest (I live in Illinois), head for sparsely populated areas.
    4. Eventually find a zombie free (read: no signs of civilization). While this may be difficult, it will allow for relatively few raiders or other enemies.
    5. Start building some form of farm that produces the most efficient foods we can. This is where the farmers come in handy.
    6. If we find someone new, we have them go through a series of tests to make sure they will not be a liability to the group. If they fail, we send them out with a few days worth of supplies.
    7. Wear tight clothing, start working on creating or own. Beginning working on making own equipment from scratch, and start our own community.
    8. After several years have passed with zero percent zombie encounters, we send someone people out to see if the world is recovering.
    9. If we get attacked and overrun, we already decide on where to meet next. Scatter for several miles after divvying supplies into groups of two or three and meet up at the rendezvous point.

    This plan works well for long term survival, but requires good group cooperation and enough people needed to get a community working. Ideally, this would be a survival idea that one would plan some time before enacting.

  66. Nicksaurus says:

    I’d get into a double-decker bus and drive it around. Think about it! It’s full of space, holds a shitload of fuel, and is probably powerful enough to drive through a horde. Probably…

    Incidentally, does anyone know if fuel pumps would work without power?

  67. Nidokoenig says:

    1. Form a group, always. You need to prepare to live through subsistence farming and that means you need plenty of bods to the jobs. Larries are liabilities unless they can rein themselves in and they should be made aware of that, Bens need to be supervised and never left as the most competent person awake.

    2. I live near a police station, and there’s a police headquarters about an hour’s walk from where I am, so the possibility of scoring some body armour, riot shields and batons is there, as are tasers(greater stopping power against an enemy who doesn’t feel pain than a gun), so that should be a priority. Besides that or until I can acquire that, a shovel, a crowbar and some knives. Personal shields that could protect a person from zombies could be made from perforated pizza trays and some rope.

    3. I live in Hertfordshire, so neither winter nor summer are insurmountable threats and there are plenty of rivers.

    4. Most readily available clothing is jeans and jacket. I’d probably want to raid a clothing store for more jeans to tear apart and use to reinforce other clothing to two layers of denim.

    5. Find an orchard, a large, commercial one. Trees are the lowest maintenance source of food and at the very least give the group time to raid libraries and find out how to do other things. Grow potatoes for a solid, easy staple. Anything that spoils or gets infected is fed to the pigs, goats, rats, crows with their wings clipped or whatever meat animal we have available.
    As another person mentioned, make punji trap trenches. Start by making a perimeter around the farm out of wooden spikes to have a quick defence, then dig the trench inside that perimeter and line it with downward pointing spikes.
    Scavenging parties would be sent out to find medicine, seeds, tools, dry dog and cat food for protein, books on agriculture and medicine, any animals, prioritising horses and dogs but any non-working animal is still good eating. Once we learn how to grow other crops, start crop rotations immediately, then we pretty much have a sustainable community, we just expand the territory we cover and can patrol over time.

  68. Eric says:

    1. I’d try and group with people I know. Otherwise, I’d lone wolf it.

    2. I’m not familiar with guns at all, but seeing as how I’d try to stay indoors, a shotgun seems ideal. Fire-axes are readily available as well.

    3. I live in Las Vegas, which means power is generated by Hoover Dam, so I’ve got a good while before I have to worry about it going out. (I remember hearing/reading somewhere that the dam could probably run by itself for about 20 years before breaking down.) So I’d hole up in a casino, ideally near the kitchens, or somewhere they can be easily accessed. The amount of food a Strip casino has is immense, especially for a small group of people. A lot the back-of-house doors are keypad/keycard secured with some damn heavy doors. If we could clear and secure one, life would be pretty damn awesome for being a zombie apocalypse.

    4. In my casino bunker? However I please. Fighting zombies? Heaviest clothing I can find. Why people insist on zombie fighting in wife beaters and shorts is insane to me. Jackets all around, people!

    5. Plan is to wait it out. As long as the casino is secure and power’s on, life should be peachy, relatively speaking. Nellis AFB is also in town, so maybe try and contact them once we’re secure. The food won’t keep forever and Vegas isn’t exactly known for its farming, so the casino bunker is only a short term solution.

  69. Ateius says:

    Lock the door, build a barricade, and ration my food for the few days to a week it takes for law enforcement and/or the military to mow down the incredibly unthreatening barely-mobile corpses and restore order.

  70. Forumrabbit says:

    I’m an Aussie, and I’m assuming I’ll be dropped randomly in Australia.

    So my grand plan is:

    Find a car

    Drive to Uluru.

    Seriously, all everyone in the country has to do is simply drive away from the zombies; 10 minutes and you’re in the middle of wilderness, so we just wait for the ADF to deploy and wipe the zombies out (considering many of our troops are overseas, just wait for them to get back. Why wouldn’t they die over there? Because if hostiles can’t wipe out their bases then zombies sure as shit can’t)

  71. Bropocalypse says:

    Build a suit of armor out of lawnmowers and play Dead Rising 3

  72. P_johnston says:

    1)go to library/bookstore get books on farming, first aid, etc. I don’t know nearly enough to live in the wild.
    2)find survivors. Anyone who isn’t homicidal, or ben.
    3)get supplies. rifles from walmart, canned food, seeds, gas, bullets.
    4)drive far far from civilization preferable to some sort of farmland with only one family for every few miles. Get far enough from the cities and the zombies won’t be a problem.
    5)start civilization anew.

  73. hborrgg says:

    Well I live in Idaho so I might think about heading for this.

    But as far as TWD mechanics go I’d probably use my last dying breath to write on the wall about how unrealistic and stupid these zombies are.

  74. RTBones says:

    Midwestern expat living in the UK, and also a licensed pilot. Find a small airport and commandeer a Cessna/Piper, and essentially use it as a flying mobile home. Unless the birds become zombies, they cant get me when I’m airborne. It also gives me general situational awareness as to whats happening around me. This gives me mobility, since there are plenty of small airports to get fuel at, though admittedly not nearly as many as in the US. Also means I have my own easy transport to the continent or elsewhere if needs be. Make my way to girlfriends neck of the woods. If she’s OK, band together and work on finding friends. If not, continue to take stock of the situation from the air, looking for a group.

    EDIT: I should also add – get myself a decent notebook of some sort and document what I do and where I go – because when the apocalypse is eventually over, there will be people trying to figure out what happened (and WHERE it happened) so that it can be prevented from happening ever again.

  75. Will says:

    I think step one for me is to just close my door when things get scary and wait out the first couple months. I’m on the second story and the only way in (short of scaling the walls) is single staircase and a fairly solid door. That I can just nail shut and barricade with a whole apartment worth of furniture. I wonder if a stairway covered in motor oil is an insurmountable obstacle for a zombie.

    Inside I have decently full pantry and a lot of 20 gallon Rubbermaid containers that I can fill with water before it shuts off. I think the last couple weeks will be rice and multi-vitamins, but hey, it’s the apocalypse.

    Long term don’t think that Southern California is a place to stay after the food deliveries stop and the aqueducts stop working. So if the army can’t fix things it’s up the coast to Oregon or Washington with my Honda and the last of my supplies. That would be the sketchy part. I guess it would be a lot of quietly siphoning gas, running from zombies and sleeping on rooftops (I rock climb a bit). Then I join whatever colony I can find that will have me and start the rebuilding.

    I suppose if kill on sight banditry takes over I wouldn’t make it but that was always the case. Hiding my whole life seems unrealistic, fighting others at Walmart isn’t in my nature and living off the land in this desert seems impossible. So yeah, wait out the initial chaos and then find a new tribe.

    I do think it’s strange how many peoples plans amount to fleeing to rural areas based on the assumption that there are 1) lots of guns and 2) lots of food/farmland and 3) high survival rates due to low population density. Seems like those survivors would want to keep all those things and use the guns to do it. Could get ugly.

    Taking a boat out sounds like a decent idea in a lot of ways. You could drop anchor and just chill off the coast for years before your hull rusted. From there you can use a smaller craft to go ashore for supplies. That way your away team is always able bodied, awake, armed and operating in daylight. Everyone gets to sleep in safety, and you can relocate the base a few times before worrying about fuel.

    On ship agriculture seems silly because you need a lot of soil and a lot of water and that stuff is heavy. Doing desalinization for drinking water is more realistic.

    Just my 2 cents.

  76. madshaw says:

    I’d probably do a Lee, I like human contact far too much to spend the rest of my life on my own. I think I would try and find a group and live by their rules, even if there was a Lilly or a Larry

  77. Jjkaybomb says:

    Day 1. Lock myself in house. Weep in fear. Assume CDC and government will take care of it.

    Day 6. Run out of food. Realize I’m boned. Weep again.

    Day 7. Find heavy tools in home. Attempt to scavenge neighbor’s places. Realize I’m not strong enough to bust down a door and climbing a railing is difficult for a fatty like me. Cry silently, as to not attract zombies.
    I have a flashback. In middle school, I caught a mouse. I had trapped it in a corner and was somehow able to catch it in a popcorn bag. for the longest time, I just sat there, staring at it as it gnawed on popcorn seeds. Then my mom rolled her eyes, took the bag from me, and threw it into the lake.
    Moral of the story, I can’t kill worth shit. Find my preferred method of zombie escape is running the hell away.

    Day 8. Why fortify a whole stupid house? I fortify the single most fortify-able room. Probably in the basement, with tiny to no windows. If shit goes to hell, I’ll run to there. Feel so, so sweetly accomplished. Drink last of soda as reward.

    Day 9. Decorate fortified room with artifacts of my former, more human life. So pretty. Wish I had some more soda to celebrate. Guess I need to go raiding again.

    Day 12. Hate hate hate hopping fences. I go for a hike in the countryside instead. Try to shoot a deer. Realize I suck with guns. Kick a tree.

    Day 13. Raid a local greenhouse. Please carry more than flowers, please carry more than flowers, please carry more that FIVE MILLION kinds of flowers.

    Day 14. Spend a lot of time indoors staring at dirt, thinking about how to properly defend a garden. Try and build something inside. Realize digging is hard. This plan was stupid anyway.

    Day 20. HOLY SHIT, PEOPLE. NOT DEAD PEOPLE, ACTUAL COOL PEOPLE WITH GUNS AND STUFF. Throw myself at their feet, weep openly.

    Day 21. Wait, these people are kind’ve creepy. Fear that they’ll hurt me. Or do other creepy, violent things. People are complicated, anyway. I pay them to leave.
    Realize its been three weeks and I’m not dead. It all comes crashing down. Three weeks since I’ve had cooked food. Sob uncontrollably.

    Day 22. Realize that I cry a lot. Resolve to not cry anymore. Makes me cry even harder when I try and jump that DAMN FENCE. It’s been three weeks on a shoestring budget and constant running from zombies. Why am I not a slim and trim athletic masterpiece?

    Day 23. Realize that this is my life now. In a strange, sort of twisted way, it was the life I had always fantasized about. Living it rugged off the back of a former society, telling stories to myself about its former residents.
    Quietly, to my hands, I whisper.
    “I never asked for this.”
    And no one is around to hear me meme.

  78. Stranger says:

    My zombie plan?

    Die horribly, probably in some method which won’t leave a corpse to come back.

    I am utterly unfit for that type of survival, being sociable and prone to being a follower. I have no technical skills which would be valuable in such a situation, cannot shoot worth a damn, and am not even useful as a pack mule. Given my physical state currently, I would die of exhaustion or infected blisters after a week or so of marching about.

    Sorry, this is the most realistic picture for me :) It also happens to be my “world war three happened and you’re one of the survivors” plan.

  79. Some_Jackass says:

    1) A bunch of friends and myself would attempt to rendezvous at an agreed upon location. If everyone makes it there-great, if not-oh well-we alter the survival plan to compensate for the dead. We’d allow just about anyone uninfected into our group, with the understanding that the select few of us are in charge. So all the Larrys can shut the hell up and all the Bens can do nothing cuz we got this shit.

    2) This is suppose to be someone else’s job in the group. The general idea is to get guns that share the same type of ammo. Even if the specific person doesn’t make it, the gun collecting aspect of our survival won’t be that hard. We wouldn’t need much gear at first, and if everyone does their job right, then we’ll have what we need when the time comes to make the major move.

    3) We’re based in upstate NY and the plan is to get to Maine. Why? Cuz who else is running there? From there we find one of the hundreds of slightly isolated houses and fortify. A few of us will go at first to make sure everything’s good to go, then we go back and the whole group makes the move.

    4) We dress like we’re not fucking tourists up here.

    5) The plan is to make due in Maine where if the winter gets bad enough, zombies won’t even be a concern. We’ll attempt some sorts of food creation while we continue to pick clean the surrounding areas. And if it all goes to hell, plan B would be to figure a way onto one of the nearby islands off the coast (did I mention we’re setting up near the coast? And yeah, it’s the B plan for a reason).

    …………of coarse the way everyone and their brother is apparently good to go for the zombie apocalypse, the only plan anyone needs is to hold out for the weekend, which by then everything will be over with and normalcy would return.

  80. rayen says:

    1 Assuming i no longer have my family (not something i like to contemplate…) to worry about, I probably keep myself to myself. If i was in some sort of tight spot I probably look for non infected, but i’d join help out, and move on.
    2. Basic camping gear (sleeping bag, fishing pole/line, lantern, lighter, lightweight pan, swiss army knife) two pistols, rifle, machete, food and ammo as i can carry. all easy found at walmart or nearest sporting good store.
    3 I’d head for rocky mountains. Easily fortified areas, lots of wildlife, Fairly fertile soil, lots of building supplies, populated areas nearby.
    4 Blue Jeans, long sleeve tshirt, leather jacket, backpack, Knee pads, hiking boots, pair of socks on neck and pair on my feet.
    5 As i said, I’d head for the mountains. If i found a town of noninfected, i probably move in, and try to be useful. Otherwise i’d settle down near a water source and try to live out the rest of my life in peace.

  81. TMTVL says:

    Why would anyone be stupid enough to “go lone wolf”? The majority of wildlife tends to form packs for a reason: you can get much more done if you work together. Consider this: if one man would have to build a house all by himself, it’d take a good long time. By working together we’ve built castles, cathedrals, monuments,…

    Yeah, I’d join up with whoever isn’t stupid enough to piss others off.

    Also, I’m pretty good at kenjutsu, so defending against zombies probably wouldn’t be too difficult as long as they behave like in the WD universe.

  82. RCN says:

    Well, I live in Brazil in the middle of a wasteland-savannah kind of climate called cerrado that tries to kill you with drought in the winter and tries to drown you with storms in the summer (each of those lasting 6 months, no spring or autumn here). This pretty much limits my course of actions to try and survive from the city instead of from the wild.

    In the neighborhood I live every house has a pretty big wall, including my own, and mostly metal doors. Yeah, we’re not the most trusting bunch. But while this stuff doesn’t do much to stop people (unless there’s glass or barbed wire on top of the walls, which is actually common) I think this would hold off zombies nicely. The problem is that my neighborhood is far from self-sufficient. We only have 2 bakeries and 2 small markets in a 6 square kilometer area. And by small markets I mean they have 2 aisles and are half-stocked at best. And it is far from the main city. So staying put is not the best of plans, being extremely short-lived at best.

    On the other hand in the city the streets are very wide and there are no corners or alleys, so wherever you are you’ll probably see shambling zombies coming a mile away. Very few possibilities for ninja zombies, so that’s nice (it is a planned city built when cars were already around, so it was planned to accommodate cars).

    Weapons is a tough one. If I lived in Rio or in Sà£o Paulo, it’d just be a matter of finding one in the favelas. Here I’d pretty much have to break one of the police stations and hope there’s something left. There is not a single weapon store in the whole city, and I know that for a fact. Weapons are either with the military, law enforcement or in illegal hands. It is possible to privately own a gun, but it is much, much rares than in the US and it is something people usually keep secret about. This all also means that even if I get my hands on a gun, ammo will be a significant problem. So my best bet is a good melee weapon.

    For a melee weapon I’d look for a sledgehammer. Does good damage to limbs even if I miss somewhere critical and is very unlikely to get stuck on someone, and a good hit in the head is pretty much a guaranteed kill against zombies who don’t try to dodge. It’d be a very tiresome so it is better to avoid battle against large groups whenever possible, however it also has the advantage to being used to push a leading zombie in a group on his peers to slow the whole group down. I’d also look for a good survival knife for utility.

    For protection… I’d use my biking gear. Seriously, this stuff is well padded in the right places, a helmet that would be very hard for a zombie to get through, several layers of thick cloth in the neck, a thick boot and goddamn mail-reinforced gloves! I have no idea why no-one ever goes for it in zombie movies. It is remarkable mobility for an astonishing amount of protection against bites and nails. You just keep your helmet off whenever there’s no zombies around and you’re in the open to keep a good field of view.

    One other positive point is that there’s tons of fruit-bearing trees in my city, so I could even conceivably live off the land for a good while after there’s nothing left for salvage. Seriously. Just in my university there’s more than a dozen fruit-bearing trees I pass through daily. And each kind gives fruit in a different part of the year, except for the dry season, where only very few bears fruit. It is one of the perks of having no real winter.

    Beyond that, I’d probably try to secure supplies and a transport to go north into the rainforests and try to live off of it. Among the supplies, whatever books I can find on survival and the rainforests and be able to discriminate among the one’s that’ll be the most useful.

    I’d try to get a small group. Someone through incompetent like Ben I’d try to do my best to teach them some modicum of competence. Someone like Larry I’d try my best to appease. I’m a diplomat by nature, so I don’t think I’d be able to simply send anyone away unless the group gets too big, in which case it’d probably be better to split and increase the chances of each individual group.

    I guess that’s about it. The lack of guns can either be a blessing in disguise (in the Walking Dead discharging guns are nearly always a bad idea that attracts hordes of zombies, but on the other hand it is the single best chance you can have when you do get surrounded by hordes of zombies), but all in all, my area seems to be a good place to survive. Maybe…

  83. Axion says:

    I’d grab my air rifle, round up the few folks I actually care about and head into the hills. If we camp out by a reservoir we should be alright for water, and there’d be at least 3 family houses of tinned food to take with us. There’s even a bunch of old reinforced bunkers in the hills from back when there was a big rifle range up there.
    I might even make a run for the archery range down the road, since I know from experience that there’s a ton of recurves and arrows in the shack at the end.
    Might not do much to a zombie, but could be useful for hunting and driving off bandits. Sadly no guns anyway since i’m in the UK :/
    I’m sure I’d have to start doing runs into the villages for supplies eventually, but the population density around here is pretty low, so Im confident in my ability to avoid the zeds.

  84. Steve C says:

    1. Team. Anyone joining would have a 1 week quarantine and trial period. Testing them via situations to see if they steal or are a threat etc. If their personality is a Lilly then they are out. Bens would be welcome but managed as a incompetent threat to themselves and others. (I believe that most people are Bens in a crisis.) Larrys would be right out and easily so. Larry’s intro was “Let’s kill a kid.”

    2. Weapons are a hatchet (I’m good with a hatchet), hunting knife, and small pistol (preferably with silencer). These I’d have on me all the time. If I’m exploring or expecting trouble, riot shield (plexiglas shield), and spear. They would probably be home made like a sharpened garden tool handle etc and easily dropped if I had to move fast. Plus my sword but that’s more for show.

    3. Where I go will likely be determined by where I start. But I’d stay away from America. Polls consistently say that 10-20% of Americans would turn into sociopaths.

    4. Leather armor. Preferably proper armor of which I already have a few pieces. (That stuff is far better than people realize. I was once accidentally hit hard with a bat on my forearm while wearing a bracer. I barely felt it.) Since that will be hard to come by, sports equipment and leathers. IE Mad Max gear with an emphasis on practical rather than fetish.

    5. I’d be looking for industrial docks to find a large ship. The kinds of places with sturdy fences good for sticking a spear through. Fences and killing zombies rather than sneaking are must. I’m going wholesale for supplies rather than retail. (IE distribution hubs, not big box stores.) A cruise ship would also be good. They have the benefit of always starting abandoned. Cause the first thing that those crews do in an emergency is leave without telling anyone.

  85. Even says:

    I’d probably gather what family I could and then try to figure out a plan depending on how the situation looks. If it’s the type where society crumbles within couple weeks, then gather supplies and drive up further north of the Finnish Lapland and maybe try get in contact with some reindeer ranchers. A very remote area, people with knowledge how to best survive in the area, extremely low population density and a decent food supply of reindeer meat (provided they can keep the herds alive, which shouldn’t be too big of a problem as long as the population density stays as low as it is). Plus it’s the coldest area in the country, which should at least prove a major hindrance in the form of snow for a good part of the year, if the cold doesn’t do them in. Moving in deep snow is slow without proper gear. If society breaks down, there’ll be no-one to plow the roads, which would make pretty much the whole Lapland a very inaccessible place by regular road vehicles and somewhat challenging to travel on foot. Barring they can do the ninja-teleport trick, it would take ages for the zombies to get anywhere.

  86. Scrambled says:

    Living in the middel of nowhere South of France, i think my survival chances would be decent. With some of the lowets population in the country Zombies wouldnt be numero uno problemo, it would be more of a focus on survival after civilization.

    initially i’d just stock up on as much food as i can get and retreat to my countryhouse home, with near to 0 population centers around and weather the first weeks/ month.

    transportation would defenitly be a problem because everything is so distant, but thats what horses are for. i would take trips to the nearby towns to scavenge whatever little is left. try and organise with the farmers and survivors.

    Weapon wise firearms will pretty much be hunting rifles and thats it, europe and everything, so i would probably go with something melee ,medieval type weapons from the small castles and museums i think spear for myself.

    in general my region would have a decent chance at keeping a decent level of order if we organise ourself, we have hydro-electric damn,solar fields and nuclear plants to keep some sort of power running up, defensible farms and hills ;rivers and lots of agriculture going on there as well.

    Now if we have zombie or even survivors migration that would change a lot and we would probably fortify in the old castles and citadels around we even have totally fortified towns already.

    Long term goal would be creating a lasting community of fortified towns and farms to sustainable level and expand from there.

    If we play our cards right we could have a smoother ride than most on the zombie steamroller.

  87. The most important things are a sustainable supply of food and water. The fundamental problem with the zombie apocalypse is that it is an inherently urban nightmare. If you have a susceptible population that may have hundreds or thousands of people per square mile, that means potentially thousands of zombies. For reference, San Francisco has a population density of 6,639 people per square kilometer or 17,179.2 people per square mile. But the moment you get to a rural area, your population density drops off markedly. All this says to me is that one should find a farmstead, away from easy sight from the road to avoid roving bandits, and just begin doing subsistence agriculture and farming. If your house is the only one on a hundred acres of land, which is actually a relatively small ranch or farm, your total zombie encounters will be virtually nil.

  88. If there’s been a breakdown in law and order and there are zombies roaming the place, I’d knock on my neighbors’ doors and try to convince them all to help fortify the place with the 8′ privacy fence. We’re on city water here, so when I first heard the news I’d fill every container, sink, and tub we have with water (boil before drinking–we have a crapload of firewood in the backyard).

    Food would be problematic, but there are tons of squirrels, rabbits, and birds around here, so given that I am in possession of substantial stored calories, food wouldn’t be an immediate concern, just security and hydration.

    If the situation kept up, it might be necessary to move out of the suburbs.

    Personally, I find the whole zombie apocalypse thing pretty absurd, though.

  89. Taluien says:

    Wall of Text incoming.

    Okay, Zombie Apocalypse. Let’s go over the rules, TWD Zeds, which means receptive to stimuli, both visual and audio, quite quick on their feet, do not feel pain, determined to eat me. Let’s say, for a bit of a mindjog, that I was on vacation in the US and get stranded in… (random zooming on Google Maps occurs) Charleston, West Virginia. My initial possessions are a small travel suitcase with a bit of clothing and that’s about it.

    Now, let’s assess the situation: I’m in a town I know next to nothing about, in a country I know not much about. I do however speak English quite well, so at least I could communicate with other survivors.

    First things first, ditch a bit of my spare clothing to make room in the suitcase, get a weapon – fireaxe, baseball bat, metal pipe, something like that, maybe even a pistol though that would be more of a last resort kind of weapon – then try to locate a store where I could find food and water supplies and a map. Other essentials would include matchsticks, a compass, a thick blanket. Bottled water. If I do come across other survivors, try to make contact silently, so a flashlight, a mirror or something else to give light signals with would be good.

    Okay, let’s say I survived so far, have found a small group and we have to decide what to do next, still in Charleston. I would advocate going into the country, with the general direction being Lexington. Simple reason for that, it’s farm land and there’s a bit of rivers running there. Search for a farm with flat, empty land around, not too far away from fresh water. Would be easier to defend as you can spot things coming from miles away and at the same time have to worry less about Zeds, since most of them will be in cities, not the countryside. Also less likely to have a horde coming for you. The trip won’t be easy, it will be risky and we will have to be smart about it. Let’s say, we are 7 people in the group. Traveling would have to be done by vehicle, otherwise supplies would run out too soon and we would be hardpressed for more scavenging runs, which would effectively result in more risks than driving. Once you get out of the city, hordes get less of a problem and you can lose them relatively easy.

    2 vehicles, I’d say, one something like the Mercedes-Benz Sprinter so you can transport a good load of stuff, the other a typical 4 seater. Try getting something that can run a long time without refilling. Scavenge as much useful stuff as we can, which means clothing for both hot and cold climate, reserve fuel, preservable food, bottled water, medicine, tools, wooden boards (you never know when you need to barricade something), tents, blankets, soap (will keep risk of illness a bit at bay), ammunition, weapons, radio, batteries (and something to reload them with manually if possible), matchsticks, a bit of animal food (bait), DIY books, binoculars. Also, if possible, explosives. TNT, preferably, due to it being safe to use, easy to handle and safe to transport.

    If we made it this far, we can fortify the position, farm and try to keep up with what happens. If other people wander upon us, we can offer them shelter in a controlled environment, a repurposed small shack or something like that, maybe a blockhouse. Basically something where you can lock others up with simple means, just to make sure they are not trying to fuck you over. Trade would be possible, but we should try to be as self sustaining as we can. Since wood and water are nearby, the only thing we would actively have to still scavenge for are medical supplies and food, until farming gets self sustaining. Problem with farming would be where to get seeds, genetically altered not to reproduce grains are a pain in the ass in that case. For meat we can try to hunt, though I can’t say anything about the probability of that. In the long run this would be a pretty plausible way to live, the only thing to fear would be bands of raiders.

    Which brings me to the next part, defense. Farmhouse, probably multistoried. Reinforce doors and windows with wooden planks or metal sheets, leaving a bit of space to shoot through. Establish a perimeter with a fence, about 2 meters high, if possible barbed wire on top. Anything that tries getting in must be considered hostile and will be shot, which means guard posts on the perimeter all the time. Every inhabitant will be trained in handling firearms, some boobytraps between the perimeter and the house itself will also ensure safety. Basically, make it a nut too tough to crack without casualties, that should discourage most raiders and also give safety against zombies, should they wander. If such a massive horde as in TWD should happen to come by, it would be visible for quite some time, in that case pack up everything we can salvage, jump into the cars and drive off. Maybe even get some off road capable cars or even horses, so we can lose them by not leaving that big of a trail to follow (given on how the TWD Zeds followed the train/tracks I would deem the risk of this actually happening as quite low, as there wouldn’t be an initial stimulus from our side, compared to a big, loud train running through the countryside).

    Okay, now for some things that would be nice to have:

    – MP5SD: Simple reason, a silenced MP, chambered for 9mm, with a capability for Single Short, 3-Burst and Full-Auto. Which means you have something that will reliably put down Zeds at a distance, has very common ammo and is really silent when compared to a normal handgun. Ducttape a laserpointer on the side of the barrel and you have a gun that is easy to handle and accurate, even for someone relatively new to shooting.

    – Nightvision Goggles/Rangefinder/Binoculars: Would make nightruns a lot easier.

    – A generator

    – Radio equipment

    Alternatively, get a gun, get a bullet, put the bullet through my head. Quick, simple and I spare myself a whole lot of turmoil. And nobody else will have to rekill me.

  90. Somniorum says:

    Shamus – if asthma is the primary concern, then your first step is to get to Alberta, Canada, as asthma kinda… just disappears when you live here.

    I theoretically have asthma, but whenever I live in Alberta, I have *zero* problems. Regardless of the weather, regardless of my physical activity, regardless of the time of the year.

  91. PhantomRenegade says:

    My team is my family, no backstabbing there.

    Weapons, dunno, probably have to stick to fire axes and stuff like that, i don’t think i know anyone that has a hunting shotgun let alone a pistol. Firearms are not very common in my contry.

    àŽ have the as perfect as it gets for my team to survive the zombies, and we actually own it, the team heads off to the walled off farm.

    You dress in what is apropriate, always tight clothes suited to the weather.

    Grow crops, there’s actually some corn already growing there right now.

    Still no matter how good your plan is the most likely thing is that you’ll die trying to execute it so there isnt much point in spending too much time thinking about it.

  92. Steve C says:

    An Alternative is to; (A)Go to a fitness gym. (B)Take all the treadmills and put them outside. (C)Have them turn on with a motion sensor. (D)Laugh.

  93. NBSRDan says:

    First I’d head down the street to my gun-obsessed neighbor. There we’d load up all the supplies we can fit into however many cars are available, blog/email/call everyone we know while those systems still work, and hopefully get a bit of gun training.
    Next, we pick up the Useless Chicks on the way to Big 5, hoping to be the first ones there, and pick up more guns, and more importantly, ammo.
    The last stop is the nearest Costco, and the mission is to secure the perimeter. Only once we have a safe building with a metric shitload of food can we think about venturing out for extermination, rescue, medicine, and reusable weapons. In the case of bandits, we shoot them from the roof. If there isn’t a complete extermination by the time we run out of food, the entire planet is probably overrun.

  94. Deaderpool says:

    I’m assuming I begin anywhere in the South-East, because the cold would kill me in the North and the South-West is a mysterious land of deserts and San Fransiscos.
    Since I’m in the South I’m never more than 10 yards away from a firearm. It’s not the highest priority, but it’s a big deal as I don’t want to engage in melee combat if I can help it. First priority is simply find an out-of the way town. Assuming I can survive a few days of hiking (I know land nav but don’t know how to forage) a backwoods town with or without other inhabitants would probably have enough for a few months as I/we figured out more sustainable solutions. Finding proper farmers or gardeners would be paramount.
    I’m assuming a group of at least 10 from here on out because less than that makes planning or assigning roles basically impossible. Should we have to deal with outsider human settlements posing a threat the options are absolute offensive action with the goal of extermination or scattering them, absorption of either into the other if they’re reliable, and leaving. A proper response to roving bandits requires a larger group than is likely to be available.
    Ultimate goal is to find a prison or other defensible installation and relocate there, beyond that it’s impossible to plan.
    Overall guiding principals are: Endure, Stabilize, Unify.

  95. kmc says:

    As far as a group, I’d ideally group up with my family and some friends here at work; our little social group is more than usually resourceful, handy, and used to being in wilderness situations.

    Personally, I’d cut off all my hair and start off in my heavy gi and hakama and strap my katana and bokken to my waist. Of course, it depends on what kind of damage you have to do to the brain, like, can I slice it or do I have to smash it? But I think I could do the job with the katana, at least to start. It’s not too much of a stretch to get some leather gear and a few more weapons that might come in useful, like a couple of naginata. Melee isn’t the best, but it’s what I’m trained in. I like someone’s earlier idea of a pitchfork to hold one back while someone else finishes it off, so we might try to pick that up.

    Others in the group already have quite an arsenal, and we’re already used to working together, so I think we’d be able to figure out a good combo of firearm-based and melee defense. Assuming we survived, I think we’d end up getting good enough that we’d start sending out hunting parties to reduce the local population of zombies.

    As for a base of operations, honestly, we’d probably set up at work. We already work in a secure environment, so it’s physically protective, and even if everybody else here had the same thought, the buildings are big enough. The population of the building would have already been used to careful entry and exit, so we could trust them more than just a random collection of people.

    When we had to move around, we’d probably try to take a slow-but-steady pace where we had a few people in the middle being protected by a ring of defenders. Of course, I’d hope my mother would stay alive, but I have an 11-month-old baby and she would be my absolute first priority. In fact, our whole group has young kids, so we might end up organizing non-fighters and fighters and spending a lot of our down time teaching the kids various fighting techniques. They’d certainly make it difficult at first, but as each one got a little bit older, we’d suddenly have a new member of the community who was not only strong and healthy but also had grown up with this lifestyle. Ultimately we’d be stronger for it.

    We have various skills, so we’d probably try to get somewhere that we could build a little community and try to barter with passing travelers and new members. For instance, I spin and knit, so I could be a very good resource for cradle-to-grave (so to speak) fabric and rope for clothing and survival use.

    … This is, of course, assuming my family is still alive. If my daughter didn’t make it, what would I have to live for?

  96. Mitchell says:

    I live in isolated Australia, and the beauty of the place is that I live in a low population density area. Roughly four-hundred thousand people in a large city.
    This hopeful fact has brought to light the details that I have less chance of Walker encounters.
    But resting on the con side is that Australia has next to zero guns. So no firearms for extreme situations.

    Mostly my plan of action is to take the mall near my home, systematical eliminate all zombies, and begin the bunkering down….. Oh, and proclaim myself as Lord of the Ozzies.

  97. Deoxy says:

    1) Look for people with even half-decent welding skill and welding equipment (the second should be easy to find in any construction area).

    2) Build steel tower – easy supply of parts from any nearby buildings (since nearly everybody’s dead)

    3) Design large, simple, human-powered (if necessary) meat-grinder on the ground level. (Or even simpler, a large, heavy object, such as a car, and a chain and pulley.)

    4) Make a lot of noise, attract as many zombies as possible, kill them all.

    5) Get back to normal life. Repeat step 4 whenever necessary.

    Seriously, simple shamblers are tremendously easy to deal with with only a little of the right effort. Ever taken advantage of bad AI in a game? Generic zombies have the worst AI EVER.

    Any brainless, “walk at the food” style zombie, even one with a little bit of “avoid obvious danger” capabilities, can be wiped out in enormous numbers by very simple things.

    In any “end of the world” style situation, spending a week building a “does nothing useful except kill zombies” contraption is a good investment of time, once you’ve got even the very basics covered.

  98. decius says:

    Go to library. Join or create the group of survivors who thought the library would be the best place to secure.

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