T w e n t y S i d e d
It’s like one of those heartwarming Disney movies where parent and kid swap bodies and engage in hijinks that help them understand each other in a new way, leading reconciliation and a greater appreciation for each other. And love.
Only, in this case the father and son are Vader and Luke, and swapping places has only escalated a feud that will end in hilarious murder and madcap corpse abuse. To wit, he is on her site and she is on his site and I’m just going to hang out here and wait for this whole thing to blow over.
Technically, Josh and I also traded blogs today. I mean, he posted Spoiler Warning, and then I didn’t do a damn thing because he doesn’t have a blog. Or a website. Or Twitter. Or Facebook. Or a picture of himself. It was like “Trading Places” with the invisible man.
Twelve Years
Even allegedly smart people can make life-changing blunders that seem very, very obvious in retrospect.
Overused Words in Game Titles
I scoured the Steam database to figure out what words were the most commonly used in game titles.
Rage 2
The game was a dud, and I'm convinced a big part of that is due to the way the game leaned into its story. Its terrible, cringe-inducing story.
Tenpenny Tower
Bethesda felt the need to jam a morality system into Fallout 3, and they blew it. Good and evil make no sense and the moral compass points sideways.
I Was Wrong About Borderlands 3
I really thought one thing, but then something else. There's a bunch more to it, but you'll have to read the article.
Mumbles wins. Throwin’ that out there.
NEXT TIME GADGET
If I’ve learned anything from JaR, it’s that trolling Rutskarn is always hilarious.
That last part makes me think that part of your expenses to destroy Mumbles involved buying a metallic claw arm and chopping off one of your own so you could correctly use that line.
Broken link spotted! “his site” probably has some brackets missing.
With that in mind it’s Ruskarn who’s in the lead again. Conspiracy?
I suppose that could be an interesting movie as well. Trading places with some guy who never does anything, just spend the whole movie chilling, and get a better appreciation of what it’s like to do nothing. There’s definitely money in this idea.
So, like John McClane changing places with Jeff Lebowski?
Why Haven’t There Been Any Good Father-Son Mind-Transfer Comedies Lately?
In joshes defense i could also be considered an Insisible man as i currently dont have any photos of myself available.
Dammit Josh, I’m aiming to be the last person on the planet that doesn’t have Facebook – get Facebook!
In other news, I feel like it would be more terrifying if they got a joint blog. Vader and Luke versus the world; yikes.
“Join me, and together we shall RULE THE GALAXY as Father and Son.” The blog would only be the start.
I could see it now. Luke posts asking people to join them and Vader posts saying that he killed all the people who offered to join them. A fight ensues and out of it all a HILARIOUS sitcom is created staring John Travolta as Luke and Michael Clarke Duncan as Vader. Vader doesnt get a suit though.
Fun fact, George Lucas is making a Star Wars sitcom.
No, I am not joking
Its also being written by the Robot Chicken team.
Make of that whatever you wish.
So… he’s decided to pay the Robot Chicken people ridicule him? Weren’t they already doing that for free?
Yes they were doing it for free, but presumably he wasn’t seeing a red cent from it either. Because “parody”.
Now they can have their cake, while Lucas eats it.
Personally if someone came along and offered me to make money to ridicule them id accept it in a heartbeat.
Also if anyone wants me to openly ridicule you just send some money to my paypal and drop your name at my blog and ill make a post ridiculing you.
I think you’ll need to do a small sample of ridiculing before anyone is going to pay you.
Well if someone will willingly give me there name and some facts about them i will gladly give one free ridiculing as an example of how it would be for others. And i mean embarassing facts not “I won first place at my track meet in high school”
I think we should do Dreamcast for this Star Wars sitcom.
Sorry,but youll have to outlive me in order to achieve that.And youll never outlive me!
you realize rutskarn calls you shamu in his DM post. I may be wrong but i think he’s making fun of you by simultaneously comparing you to a famous water mammal and intentionally cutting off your name… that or I’m reading to far into things and subconsciously trying to sow seeds of doubt and bitterness for reasons i don’t quite understand.
basically I’m Loki now.
No I saw that nicely layered insult as well.
If Shamus is to trade places with Josh he should be the one playing New Vegas, scrolling through all the inventory, selling the incinerator, listen to every conversation, not skip a single sentence, selling the incinerator, putting all points into repair and speech, selling the incinerator, and FINALLY put up some Black Mountain Radio. Then Josh can bitch about the play style and lament the loss of the Incinerator. It’d probably end getting mauled by a cohort of deathclaws but it’d be worth it.
Shamus, please do this. For us? Please?
That could be kind of interesting. Round-robin players, rotating every week. Need a game where it’s easy/possible to schlep the save file from machine to machine though….
You’ll never take my incinerator alive!
It’s already dead, Josh.
It will live on, in the hearts and minds of us all!
Its not dead,it still pulsates with the fire of life!
Which ironically kills all it touches.
Its dead Jim.
I think its more like Shroedingers Incinerator, it exists in a state of both sold and unsold at the same time.
Heh. What was that DF Let’s Play… ah, yes. Boatmurdered.
Heh.
Also, put points in guns and energy weapons if he’s going to use them.
And keep his health up near maximum at all times.
Josh is the only one of you ready for when the computers take over.
Aw, it’s their first internet date.
True love in the making.
Too bad they don’t play MMOs, then they could get virtual married and make winky-faces in guild chat.
I am Phase and I approve of this message.
This is my favorite post in the Citadel.
Im Dick Cheney, welcome to Wal-Mart and go f**k yourself.
Heck, Rutskarn even throws a veiled mention of unresolved sexual tension in his post. It’s not as if they’re not giving the slashers in theirs(ours?) little fan group a lot of material.
Slashers are for same-sex pairings only, I think. Everyone here except Jibar and I are shippers, because only Jibr and I know the truth.
Everyone knows about you three. No need to be coy.
But now Jibar will forever be on the outside with his unrequited love.
And serves him right for those disturbing mind images that he gave me from that LP. The human mind can’t permanently forget anything it sees. AHHHHHHHHH.
“He is on her site and she is on his site” – That has got to be a premise for some crappy summer ‘romance comedy’ or something..
In all fairness, though, neither of them stuffed the other’s blog full of pink hearts and bunnies, so there is still a sliver of hope left for sanity.
please don´t give them ideas.
No the pink bunnies and hearts are gonna be done when the do this again on Valentines day
Ha! It seems I am no longer alone in thinking there’s some romance between the two (Rutskarn and Mumbles, that is)! I’ve been hammering on this ever since episode four or so in the Bioshock series, for god’s sake…
So… who’s Vader. and who’s Luke?
Rutskarn’s obviously the young and whiny one.
That’s not fair! Everyone’s so mean to me!
Why are you complaining? the young, whiny one gets the badass cowl and red lightsaber. Which means you get to spite Mumbles even more by being evil space batman.
Maybe he meant to say (whine?): “That’s not true! That’s impossible!”
I wonder if Mumbles’ helmet gets smelly?
If so that could lead to an awkward nickname. Hmm… I’m all out of ideas here. Help me out, anyone?
…every time someone makes a smelly joke, a rutskarn gets punched in the stomach.
we don’t have to make them…you oh so easily walk into them yourself :3
I fail to see the problem here.
I approve of this line of jokes.
So we get to tease you and Rutskarn suffers at the same time?Its a win win!I feel like yeoman chambers in a pack of varren in heat!
Oh hi there strange mental image, where did you come from.
Im sending you the bill for all the mental bleach that you made me use from that metaphor
Well how young? After all, Mumbles is a 10 year old boy.
and rutskarn is a 12 year old boy!
So it’s less ‘romance’ and more ‘showing each other disgusting frogs and make mean jokes about cooties’.
And making each other eat worms.
And dirt dont forget dirt
And wedgies to
Still not really sure how this is supposed to be different from actual romance.
Its an elementary school romance, the type of romance where the people involved dont REALIZE that the romance is occuring.
This man speaks the truth.
Vader? Luke? Oh, nonononono, we’re talking of the Episodes 1-3 here, people.
Rutskarn: “Mumbles, you’re breaking my heaart!!!”
So it’s slash after all!
This went on the wrong comment. oops.
So your saying that Mumbles would be a terrible over-acting loser who turns Vader into this little emo kid in a big black suit?
This only solidifies my theory that Ruts and Mumbles are the same person.
*is where I’d run away if I wasn’t severely out of breath from all the previous running*
Funny, I always got a Locke – Demosthenes vibe from the two of them. Only not quite as dysfunctional as the originals. And talking about entertainment rather than philosophy/politics.
Come to think of it, the comparison doesn’t hold water at all?!
Ender’s Game ftw. Except I still don’t know which is which.
I still find the entire concept of Locke and Demosthenes thing from the book hilarious. Yes I realize the book was written before the internet proper, but still: “Lets take over the world by being smart on the internet LOLZ.”
I prefer to think of us as Wheatley and GLaDOS.
I’m Wheatley. Naturally, of course.
I dunno, Mumbles. You make a lot more death threats than Rutskarn does.
Gee, I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Heh. Wheatley and GlaDos. You know Wheatley’s the MORON, right?
*waits*
Also, Rutskarn was the one with the British accent.
Oh, really? Is he the moron? See, I thought he was the one evveerrryoonnnee liked so much that they were willing to help him kill someone who loved them. Again.
Nope. Wheatley’s the idiot.
End of discussion.
As a resident of Britain, please. Don’t call that a British accent.
I apologize. I should have said “British” or faux British. :D
So don’t call me a moron
I’m super astute
There is no conundrum that my core cannot compute
No don’t call me a moron
You fostered balloon
My IQ’s the infinite space from here to the moon
I see this and I INSTANTLY start singing the dang thing in my head. I don’t know whether to thank you or curse you. Maybe both.
Mortal Kombat Party was actually pretty good.
*spends two minutes mentally reenacting the “What’s wrong with being adopted?” scene with Mumbles’ and Rutskarn’s voices respectively*
He’s Moriarty, to your Holmes.
Joker, to your Batman.
Aristotle, to your BIG SMASHY SPIKE PLATE!
The Seto Kaiba to your Yugi Motou
I dunno, I see you more of the Adventure core in Ruts. You, on the other hand, are the (Batman) Fact core.
Everyone knows Mumbles would be Profanity Core and Rutskarn would be Pun Core.
Who would be Crab Core?
So Rutskarn is Action Comics and Mumbles is Detective Comics?
I wonder if the two of them will also reset to #1 in a month or so.
Bah. Hardcastle and McCormick.
Although who’s who in the zoo is Anybody’s guess. Hello, Anybody?
I also notice that Josh doesn’t have a calendar, or else he’s posting on your blog from somewhere outside of normal space-time.
The date-thing that Shamus uses only displays the date on the most recent (the one on top) post when multiple posts are made on the same day. You’ll notice this in other instances of multi-post days as well.
I had noticed, but my way is funnier.
Now all we need is Ruts to sing “Love is in the Air” by Tom Jones
I think people will agree when i say that they need to do a duet of that song. Or a song hipster enough that mumbles will willingly sing it.
Yoshimi, perhaps?
I wouldn’t exactly call The Flaming Lips hipster as they routinely sell out arenas.
We need to find the MOST hipster band ever. Although if you read Questionable Content then youll realize that the most hipster/greatest band ever doesnt actually exist because Music equals the inverse of the band times their notoriety squared meaning that no matter how obscure the band as long as they exist they cant be the greatest band ever because the greatest band ever doesnt exist
Or a picture of himself.
You mean Josh doesn’t look strikingly like Teddy Roosevelt? I’m shocked, someone is misrepresenting themselves on the web!
Someone should do something about that.
Pffft pictures of oneself on the internet are sooooo 2007, these days its good to just steal someone elses pictures and give them devil horns. That or 8-bit-ify yourself.
So when is the marriage?
If they get married i call dibs on being the flower girl, gender conventions be damned.
I have a feeling Rutskarn will want to double as that. He’ll be the bride too, obviously.
So when he walks down the aisle in his flowing white gown hed be holding the bouquet in one hand and a basket full of flower petals in the other?
While Mumbles is standing at the altar dressed like Batman. Naturally.
If i ever get married im gonna dress as batman and take in the Christian Bale batman voice i cant help but wonder what I Do would sound like said in that voice
… this pyramid was hilarious. +1 to you all.
Am I the only one who’s vaguely annoyed by all this stuff? I come to Twenty Sided for interesting game commentary, dammit, not “young lovebirds dance around the issue of their affections”! Admittedly my heart is a cold, black stone, and I yearn only for the screams and suffering of all humanity, but that’s not really relevant.
(also post 100 because that damn thing was taunting me)
According to the counter this comment im writing right here would be comment 102 on this page.
Also if you think about it we could always start a mumbles/rutskarn drinking game.
And count yourself lucky you dont live where i do or else youd have to control the overwhelming desire to cleanse the city in nuclear fire like i do