We set out before dawn, sloshing through the icy rain that afforded the approximate visibility of a trip trough the car wash. It’s a 600 mile journey (my metric is a bit rusty, but I think that works out to be about 1,276.3 litres) from Pittsburgh to Boston. We were headed east. So was the rain. Around mid-day we found ourselves ahead of the mess and we saw dry pavement for the first time in nearly a week.
The trip took about ten hours. Slower than flying, but it was hundreds of dollars cheaper and nobody tried to unshoe me in public and play with my junk. I’m now typing this post on a laptop with a missing ‘H’ key, an unreliable ‘B’, and an infuriating habit of randomly doing a [home] or [up arrow] right in the middle of typing a sentence, for no damn reason in the world. If this computer was voice activated, it would have tried to go screw itself six times during the typing of this paragraph alone.
Note that the picture above is misleading to the point of propaganda. My wife snapped it during a very uncharacteristic moment where I’d stopped making scowly faces and swearing for a nanosecond to contemplate how much I was enjoying reaching the end of a day with my junk un-fondled.
Still no plan for PAX tomorrow, other than the fact that I will be in the Wyvern Theatre from 9:30pm – 11:30pm for the Escapist Movie Night. The crew of LoadingReadyRun, will be in the same room as myself, MovieBob, Susan Arendt and Greg Tito. I can’t promise we won’t just form a super-team and leave the theater to fight crime, so attend at your own risk.
Fun fact about our hotel room: All of the outlets in the bedroom are governed by a light switch. The same switch that controls the lights. There’s an alarm clock in the room, but it turns off as soon as you turn off the light. The only way to have the clock keep proper time is to put it in the other room, which already HAS a clock.
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72 thoughts on “PAX East 2011: Settling In”
Welcome to Boston!
That was oddly Bill Bryson-esque. I approve.
Be careful with your use of the word ‘junk’, someone might get the wrong idea. =P
“[…]Nobody tried to unshoe me in public and play with my junk.”
“My wife snapped it during a very uncharacteristic moment where […]I was enjoying reaching the end of a day with my junk un-fondled.”
Based on modern American airport-screening procedures, I’d call the word “junk” appropriate by just about any definition.
I’m pretty sure that’s the intended idea actually, considering the treatment airport security has been giving passengers lately. Apparently the words “intimate” and “personal” have no meaning to them.
Have you read anything about the TSA lately? His use of ‘junk’ was perfectly accurate.
Sorry about that, it was a reading comprehension fault of my own, not being a native English speaker I read through it quicker than I should have. My post would have made sense if that last word was “unfolded”, in this case referring to his baggage. I was (thinking I was) pointing out that the sentence could be read wrong if you read it in its two different meanings.
Sorry for the inconvenience.
Wow… I’m messing up my explanations, I’m missing a ‘do not’ in that last sentence in the first paragraph…
The third paragraph ends with “…to contemplate how much I was enjoying reaching the end of a day with my junk un-fondled.“. That pretty much implies one of the two possible meaning of ‘junk’ as being the correct one, to stay PG.
You should think about re-taking your icon picture, I’ve hardly recognized you in these new photos!
You recognized him before? I couldn’t recognize any of the crowd of internet funnymen whose work I follow if I saw them in the real world.
I could probably recognize Gabe and Tycho from watching so much PATV.
I have to agree. I spent a few seconds wondering why this article started with a picture of Robin Williams on a laptop.
I actually thought that was Conan O’Brien.
He bares an uncanny resemblance in this photo, yes.
Dave starts a two week _ vacation on Saturday. I wish I could drag him on an adventure. Suggestions welcome.
That picture makes you look almost… maniacal. Dark room, hunched over a computer, mussed up hair, beginnings of a goatee…
Shamus are you turning evil on us? Because you’re actually genre savvy enough for that to be dangerous.
I bet he is just crazy enough to make it work.
Now if the picture showed him staring into a sun then I would worry.
He does look very “stereotypical French supervillain” in that shot. The mad grin isn’t helping.
He does look a little evil but it’s kind of hot. Better keep an eye on him at PAX, Heather! He could either take over the world or take home a new girlfriend ;-)
You look much more like a “Shamus” in that pic.
If you do get that crime fighting group together, we’ve got some storms up here in Canada that I’m pretty sure are not ordinary.
I hate you for reminding me of that.
You almost made me laugh out loud at work :)
OH, that picture cinched it. You totally look like a Jeremy Renner in between roles. Like, you are just hiding out in your bungalow, presumably mainlining heroin. D: It’s so awesome.
I’ve had that problem in hotel rooms. The secret is to leave the light switched on and turn it off at the lamp””whether by a lamp switch or (if needed) unscrewing the lightbulb.
Taking a hammer to it usually works as well. Not so much for turning it back on, though.
1276.3 L to go 600 miles? That gives your car about 0.76 km/L. You might want to have that engine looked at, son ;-)
That was a joke…he didn’t consume 1276.3L to go 600 miles, but translated 600 miles into 1276.3L which is not a length-unit, hence the funnies…
For the lulz…600 miles equals 965.6064 kilometers…
Of course he was; I was joking back. Hence the ;-) emoticon.
At least I was not the only one compelled to do the correct conversion after seeing that type mismatch.
Would have been funnier if he had converted 600 miles to 316 Celsius… ;)
Good photo. Compliments to the photographee and the photographer!
Oh… You chose today of all days to mention Boston to a Montrealer (me)… :-(
With the beard, you look like LRRs Grahams older brother
I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought this.
I thought junk fondling was a perk for which it was worth paying hundreds more ;-) I’m not much of a flier myself. I don’t dislike it (or course, I haven’t done any flying since TSA got very cozy with everybody’s private parts) but 3/4 of the fun of a trip for me is the journey. I’m not so much on “destination vacations.” I’d rather just road trip.
I bet it was doubly fun for you two since you haven’t been away alone in so long. All that wonderful car time to chat makes the miles pass faster and funner (and yes, I just did that to the English language).
Mari, we actually finally got to listen to Ender’s Game (I have spent several years trying to convince Shamus to take the time to read it. :)) And I am totally with you on road trips–LOVE them. And if you ever decide to visit Western PA let us know–we live in a great little hicktown.
I still can’t reconcile the pictures of Shamus that I’m seeing now with the profile picture and my mind’s eye.
That hotel room lighting system is ridiculous. Unless there is some local electrical code that somehow allows such shoddy work that is against the NEC. Tell me the bathroom at least has a GFI.
Daww, he’s sho cute. ^___^
I was in a place like that. I literally spent the first night trying to figure out which outlet wasn’t tied to the switch. I finally gave up when I realized that the only outlet that wasn’t wired to the switch was clear on the other side of the room and just decided to use my cell phone as my alarm.
Make sure to check out SpyParty!
Of course now it is the goal of all the fans at PAX to go for your junk…..
Hide the junk!!!!!
You’re such a troll, Shamus. :P
But seriously, I hope you enjoy your time there. :)
“my metric is a bit rusty, but I think that works out to be about 1,276.3 litres” Stop trolling us !!!
I guess to you guys 600 miles is something almost usual but I would have to cross my entire country diagonally to travel this much. Hope your gas isn’t as expensive as ours !
Metric wise if you’re travelling 600 miles in 10 hours, at that rate my little german car (big enough for a family of 4 with luggage, though the biggest non-stop journey we do at the moment is 3 hours, so we’d probably want something bigger and hungrier for your journey) would manage about 300 miles on 40 litres, so about 80 litres in total. Admittedly it is super efficient car but… I suspect you were exaggerating for comic effect.
I’m pretty sure Shamus used litres themselves as a joke, and not as a “traveled X miles and spend Y litres”. Maybe next time he should use miles to cubic metres and see if then everyone gets the joke.
But then everyone will chime in on that cubic metre is actually a unit of volume, not distance.
Next time he should just use miles to cheeseburgers. Or miles to Sids, just to annoy Rutskarn some more.
But cheeseburgers don’t work within context, because CBs should be an US measurement. It would have to be km to CB.
Maybe miles to crepes?
Or maybe we should stop before anyone gets hungry.
When converting CheeseBurgers to Crepes, don’t forget to carry the wheat.
Well, I thought it was funny. The sort of joke where you go “Wha? How stupid is he- Oh wait he’s joking, haha.” that Shamus seem to like.
Also, detailing the conversion (“I think you have to factor it with 2,1 something”) might also work.
I’m confused. I thought it was funny as well (in the “wait, what?” kinda way), and I can’t figure where I gave the impression that I didn’t.
Was… Was that a reply to me or Shamus ?
Yeah, I thought that number was pretty high, too. Then I realized it took Shamus 300 miles just to get across the state of Pennsylvania.
…I’m glad I live so convenient to the airport.
HF at the show. wish i was there. Didn’t expect the Weekend pass to completely sold out so quickly :( Its not even too long a trip to go there from NYC
My wife snapped it during a very uncharacteristic moment where I'd stopped making scowly faces and swearing for a nanosecond to contemplate how much I was enjoying reaching the end of a day with my junk un-fondled.
Your wife is doin’ it wrong.
In all seriousness and stepping back over that line I just crossed, I REALLY am regretting being unable to go to PAX. It was like a perfect storm of circumstances. I had to take three days sick a few weeks ago, my Check Engine light came on Wednesday (turned out my gas cap was loose. Hurray for panic!), and I was enlisted last week to help a team debug a project that is behind schedule, meaning taking off this week after being sick would have been doubly bad.
But reading this…
Still no plan for PAX tomorrow, other than the fact that I will be in the Wyvern Theatre from 9:30pm ““ 11:30pm for the Escapist Movie Night. The crew of LoadingReadyRun, will be in the same room as myself, MovieBob, Susan Arendt and Greg Tito. I can't promise we won't just form a super-team and leave the theater to fight crime, so attend at your own risk.
That’s just salt in the wound. Throw in the Extra Credits guys and I may as well shoot myself.
Errrr… Okay, so we WON’T tell you who else is there.
Btw, didn’t see Shamus on the guest list for that pannel, so glad to see you’ll be there good sir. That already looked like the best 3 hours of the day anyways. I just hope the lines aren’t TOO crazy…
I lied and spontaneously came up. Yay
My home laptop does the random repositioning of the cursor thing when typing as well. I find that disabling the touch pad prevents this. Might not be your problem, but if it’s an option it could be worth a try.
Totally thought that picture was of Conan at first glance.
Um, Shamus? You’re in a hotel room. Leave a wake up call with the front desk. You don’t need a clock. The phone ringing will work just fine. Then turn off the lights and the clock.
But what if the phone is also connected to the switch? :)
Although I guess it would be powered through the phone line instead.
They cleverly hooked that up to the same “Blackout” switch, obviously.
Who’s the scruffy guy in the picture?
wait, you’re laptop is missing the h key too?
HOLD ME, KINDRED SPIRIT!
The pannel was awesome, even if Shamus was a bit quiet at times. Btw, I am SO glad I’m not the only one with a filthy filthy mind. Nice meeting you, hope you have oodles of fun at Pax and am now looking even more forward to next season of Spoiler Warning…
Something he neglected to mention was we only had about 15 hrs sleep over the previous 3 days and aside from being on his feet all day he was up 4 hrs past when he has been going to bed. So he did remarkably well considering. :)
Silly and/or stupid question – How much was taking the train in comparison to driving (asking as a fan of traveling by train).
$500 dollars difference, plus would have had to drive an hour to get to the train station and would only have saved 2 hrs.
Shamus, you’ve lost weight! And gotten hairier!
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