It is Pitch Black

By Shamus Posted Saturday Aug 9, 2008

Filed under: Nerd Culture 39 comments

There is no culture that cannot be improved by nerding it up. Including rap culture. Especially rap culture. For example, you could make a rap song about Zork.

It is Pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

> What is a grue?

The grue is a sinister, lurking presence in the dark places of the earth. Its favorite diet is adventurers, but its insatiable appetite is tempered by its fear of light. No grue has ever been seen by the light of day, and few have survived its fearsome jaws to tell the tale.

> Play MC Frontalot.

Listening to the lyrics some more, there are references to a ton of different old-school interactive fiction games, not just Zork. I only recognize a few, but I can tell there are even more I’m missing.

 


 

The End of Piracy!

By Shamus Posted Friday Aug 8, 2008

Filed under: Rants 84 comments

EDIT: Some people have pointed out this is a lot more than it seemed in the article I linked. “Trusted computing” is more than just a unique ID on a chip – it’s a system that operates on both the hardware and software level. Read the comments below for the insidious details.

My original post:

Atari founder Nolan Bushnell says a new chip puts computer piracy on the verge of being eradicated. Now, I’m about to make fun of this guy, but seriously: If I could get a job that paid millions of dollars for saying outrageous things borne of lazy ignorance? Man, where do I sign up?

It is sort of alarming to see that some people – highly paid people – simply fail to grasp the basic mechanics of piracy, even after all these years. Particularly when it’s, you know, their job.

If I’m reading this right, this system isn’t even anything that new. Right now the games that require online activation build a unique ID based on what hardware is connected to the machine. This system would replace that system with a new one that is unique to the motherboard / CPU. That’s sort of nice, I guess. It means you’ll be able to install a new graphics card without needing to re-activate the game. But it’s still a check that can be disabled by any half-decent hacker.

If I may be allowed to commit the self-indulgent crime of quoting myself:
Continue reading ⟩⟩ “The End of Piracy!”

 


 

Stolen Pixels #10:
Gameplay Tutorial

By Shamus Posted Friday Aug 8, 2008

Filed under: Column 0 comments

The tenth Stolen Pixels is now up. It’s about Assassin’s Creed. Tell your friends.

 


 

Wishlist

By Shamus Posted Thursday Aug 7, 2008

Filed under: Random 94 comments

I have created an Amazon Wishlist. If you’re one of the people who has offered to buy me a game recently because you want to see my review, then read on.

EDIT: Okay. You can stop now. I expected this is be some low-key thing. I thought I might get one or maybe two if someone was feeling generous. Maybe a game would show up every odd month or so. I just checked the page and I have six games on the way. Thanks so much to those who pitched in. I wasn’t expecting this kind of response.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Wishlist”

 


 

The REAL Rogues

By Shamus Posted Thursday Aug 7, 2008

Filed under: Links 93 comments

The following is about the most incestuous link I’ve ever put up:

Fellow blogger Jay Barnson (who was one of the participants in my XFire Aftermath series) has a great article titled Going Rogue over at The Escapist (where I publish my Stolen Pixels comic) and in that article Jay interviews Steven Peeler, the guy behind Depths of Peril, which I reviewed back in June.

If you’re having trouble following all that, I might suggest making a flowchart. Another option is to simply give up on the previous train wreck of a paragraph and move onto the next one, which I promise will be far more lucid:

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “The REAL Rogues”

 


 

Videogames as Toasters

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Aug 6, 2008

Filed under: Links 25 comments

While writing my earlier post on survival horror, I found Chris’s Survival Horror Quest, which has reviews of a lot of survival horror games, most of which I’ve never even heard of. (It also reminded me of ObsCure, which I had meant to pick up ages ago, but then forgot. I haven’t seen it in stores since. Hopefully I can still find it online.)

Anyway, that site has a great pair of articles on videogames-As-Products. The first talks about the overly clinical method of reviewing games that most sites and magazines use, as if they were reviewing a purely mechanical product. Reviews seem to talk about the technical aspects of a game and never get around to the more subjective parts of the experience.

The second article goes into more detail and compares the reviews of the various forms of Resident Evil (Movies, games, soundtrack.) It also talks about how the high price of videogames makes them more of an investment, as opposed to “disposable entertainment”. (And this isn’t even taking into account the outrageous prices in Australia. $100 for a game? I get angry just thinking about it.) He also mentions the heedless pursuit of graphics spectacle, which is of course one of my favorite hobby horses.

Both are excellent and worth a read. The sort of thing that makes me say, “I wish I’d written that.”

Also worth noting is the article on the “Otherworld” version of Silent Hill. And also…

Ah crap. This is going to be one of those websites that just eats time until I’ve finished reading the whole thing.

 


 

The Survival of Survival Horror

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Aug 6, 2008

Filed under: Game Design 75 comments

Thanks so much to Double Helix Games for the changes they’re making to the Silent Hill franchise. I’m so glad that the main character in SH5 is going to be “a war veteran” and that “combat in the game will take into account Alex’s experience as a soldier”. Finally. I’m sure everyone agrees that the biggest problem with survival horror games is that the main characters didn’t kick enough ass. Perhaps next time around they can make him a space marine in power armor and give him the BFG 9000. Maybe put in a vehicle section where he can pilot a hovertank along with a wisecracking and flirtatious female sidekick. Oh! Oh! And Pyramid Head could be “re-imagined” as a 20 meter cyborg hunter-killer.

WARNING: The Surgeon General has determined that the preceding paragraph contains toxic levels of sarcasm. If exposed, flush eyes and go read something upbeat and heartwarming.

Actually, saying the main character is a soldier doesn’t have to be a deal-breaker, but in the case of Double Helix I suspect they’re just missing the zombie-stomping point. Their other major project was called Harker, which was a re-imagining of the vampire hunter Johnathan Harker, with a focus on making him “much more efficient and courageous”, which is another way of saying, “more like all the other videogame protagonists we’re trying to mimic”. We already have more than enough square-jawed ex-military heroes and brooding mystic ass-kickers in videogames, but it’s frustrating when the character concept is both cliché and it undermines the point of the game. (i.e. being frightened.)

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “The Survival of Survival Horror”