PC Hardware is “Toast”

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Feb 17, 2009

Filed under: Video Games 60 comments

This is a repost of an earlier article. The original version exploded when it was put up on Reddit. The original post is lost, along with the comments. Alas.

Hey man, I need a new toaster. You know all about kitchen stuff. Have any suggestions?

The KitchenAid4000 series just came out.

Are those good?

I have a KA4510, and it’s really good.

Does it have 4 slots?

Oh you want 4 slots? Well, the KA4510 XN goes up to four slots, but it only toasts one side.

Let’s pretend I want to toast both sides.

Then you probably don’t want a KitchenAid. Their 4000 series 4-slicers aren’t very good. You could get one of the old KA3510 XN or XNS for cheap these days, but they take like, twenty minutes to toast the bread.

Er. What else is there?

The Cuisinart 7000 series is comparable to the KA 4000 series. The 7420, 7520, and the 7420 all do four slices. Just don’t get any of the SIP models because they can’t do bagels.

SIP?

“Slim Insertion Port”. The units are small, but only regular sliced bread will fit. KA has the same thing on many of their units. Actually, if you want to do bagels with a KA you’ll need the ASI units.

Which is?

“Adaptable Slot Interface”. It just means it can handle bread of varying widths.

So I should get a Cuisinart ASI?

No no no. That’s nonsense. In Cuisinart the units all handle wide bread unless they are SIP.

My head hurts. So I want a Cuisinart 7000 series, but not a SIP, right?

Pretty much. Now, the 7000 series is actually two generations. You don’t want anything before the 7400, because the pre-7400 units actually took up two wall plugs. The 7100 and 7200 four-slotters were actually two dual-slot units strapped together, so they had two cords. Plus, they didn’t have a timer so you had to stand over them yourself.

All I want is to toast bread! Four slices! Both sides!

Then the C7520 T series is for you. You can pick one up at Wall-Mart for about $400 these days.

FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS! I could buy an oven for that! I could just go out to eat every morning for that kind of money!

Ah, if you’re worried about price then the KitchenAid 4510 ES is a good pick. It’s only got three slots but it’s retailing for about $90.

I’m looking in the Wal-Mart flyer, but I don’t see that model.

Sure you do. Right here: The “Magitoast 7″. See how underneath it says “KA4510 Ex”? That means it’s the KitchenAid 4510 ES or the KitchenAid 4510 EP, just with a brand name slapped onto it.

…?

KitchenAid and Cuisinart don’t actually sell models directly. They make the insides parts of toasters, then other companies buy them, put the fancy shell on them, and give them a new brand name. But if you want to know what you’re getting, you have to look at which design the unit is based on.

Ah! I get it! Then why don’t I get this “TastyToast 2000″, which is like that 7520 you mentioned earlier. This one is only $50.

Er. That’s not the same thing. That’s a 7520 OS. The OS means “One Slice”. Total bargain unit for suckers. Some goes for the 6000 series and anything with a MRQ after it.

You know what? I’ve decided I don’t want toast anymore. I’m switching to breakfast cereal.

I’m shopping for a graphics card, and this is exactly what I’m going through, except I don’t have a know-it-all to help me out. I have never seen such rampant ineptitude at marketing products. I’m even savvy enough to know what I’m looking for, but the endless chipset numbers and sub-types and varying configurations makes it impossible to get any sort of handle on the thing. It’s actually worse than my example above, since higher numbers aren’t always better. I’ve searched around, and I have yet to find a breakdown as clear as the conversation above. What is the difference between these two generations of cards? What does this suffix mean? Why am I seeing this chipset in one place for $119.99 and elsewhere for $299.99? Is this the same product with a huge markup, or is this second unit different in some way I can’t discern?

Features get added in the middle of numeric series. Like, an NVIDIA 7800 supports 3.0 pixel shaders, and earlier 7000 models don’t. (Or don’t list it among their features.) So it’s impossible to do any real comparison shopping until you’ve memorized all the feature sets for all the chipset numbers for both NVIDIA and ATI. Yeah, let me get right on that.

Game developers who keep cranking up the system specs are killing themselves. They’re making sure that their only customers are people who are willing to wade through this idiocy, fork over hundreds of bucks, and then muck about inside of their computers to do the upgrade. You shouldn’t need to be Seth Godin to realize most people would rather drop that same $400 on a console and have done with it. In fact, it’s pretty clear that this is exactly what people are doing by the millions.

The main advantage of the PC as a gaming platform was its sheer ubiquity. But while PCs are probably more common than televisions, PCs which are equipped with the latest hardware are pretty rare, and graphics card manufacturers seem to be doing their level best to keep it that way.

This is the second time this year I looked into upgrading, and both times it seemed like such a stupid, pointless hassle. Like our toaster-buying friend above, I know what I want, but its the sellers job to tell me what they got. Offering someone a Fargleblaster 9672 XTQ is stupid and meaningless.

It really is a shame to watch this aggregate stupidity suck all of the fun out of this hobby. Buying other electronics is fun, but buying graphics hardware is homework. ATI and NVIDIA need to adopt a policy of sensible naming of product lines, fewer products, greater differences between products, and (most importantly) clearly delineated graphics generations, so that consumers can look at a product and know what it is without needing to read the long list of specs. In an ideal world, they shouldn’t even need to understand the meaning of things like DirectX 9.0c and 3.0 pixel shaders. They should know that X is better than Y, and buy accordingly.

 


 

Stolen Pixels #65: Ten out of Ten Stars

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Feb 17, 2009

Filed under: Column 8 comments

It isn’t exactly how the scene played out in Fable 2, but this is how I remember it.

 


 

Site Update

By Shamus Posted Monday Feb 16, 2009

Filed under: Notices 35 comments

I’m pretty frustrated with the performance of this website. The recent links from Slashdot and Reddit have shown that the thing is fragile and will fold up under a wave of visitors. In general, new visitors are the worst ones to lose. Regulars will check back later if the site is down right now, but a new visitor is going to surf by without a second look if they click a link and don’t get a timely response. Life is too short to wait around for feeble websites.

I use Hosting Matters, and they host blogs even larger than mine without difficulty. I still soak up more bandwidth than even their largest plan has to offer, but the site isn’t anywhere near large enough to warrant a dedicated server or anything. So I can only conclude that the site is creating some sort of performance bottleneck. I also suspect that the problem isn’t bandwidth, but CPU cycles. PHP can keep the processor pretty busy. Things like Wavatars , the dice roller, and some of the other little gimmick plugins are no doubt creating a load that more text-based blogs don’t have to deal with.

Some wordpress plugins are CPU intensive, either due to their scope or inefficient coding. In some cases a seemingly innocuous plugin can bring down an entire machine, all by itself. I really think that web hosting companies need to give you a way of seeing how much CPU you’re using. You can see how much bandwidth and harddrive you’re using, but there’s no way to gauge CPU use short of calling up your hosting company and asking them, “So… how’s it goin?” It’s clear this site caused a lot of problems yesterday. Not just for me, but for anyone else using the Adams server at Hosting Matters. But site admins and plugin authors don’t usually have any motivation or tools for making well-behaved sites, because you can’t judge how well something works until it blows up.

Some hosts offer a little green light / red light to let you know how the machine is doing, but that only lets you know that there is a problem, not how bad it is or who caused it. Site admins would do better if we could see how many CPU cycles we’re consuming. This would make people aware of which plugins cause problems, which will lead to more efficient plugins in the future. CPU use wasn’t an issue back in the days of static HTML pages, but with all this fancy-pants PHP stuff it’s moved to the forefront. Webhosts will disable your site if it begins crushing the shared machine hosting it, so it’s a bit like a world with an enforced speed limit where nobody owns a speedometer.

Yesterday I upgraded this site to WordPress 2.7.1, and installed the Super Cache plugin. In theory, this should greatly reduce CPU load by serving static pages to most visitors. Only myself and people who have left comments (less than 1% of visitors) will see dynamic pages. Again, this should help, but I have no way of knowing until the next big rush of visitors. Let me know if anything seems screwy. I know on the backend, everything has been moved around to the point where I’m constantly getting lost. But the site itself should work exactly as before for you. I do trust you’ll let me know if this is not the case.

 


 

My Setup, Part 2

By Shamus Posted Monday Feb 16, 2009

Filed under: Personal 34 comments

So many people responded with questions the last time I talked about my setup that I thought I’d come back and try to cover this more fully. I realize there is a bit of a dorky “let me show you my room” vibe going on here, but lots of people seem interested in this idea of plugging consoles into a PC. Like installing Windows on a Mac, this is an amusing form of sacrilege.

Once again, here is the setup:

The Command Center
In an effort to head off the various “What is that X in the picture:
1) The “console keyboard” is just a plain old wireless keyboard. The receiver is tucked behind the wall of consoles where it can be plugged into either the PS3 or Xbox as needed.
2) The “switch” is a simple little A/V selector, similar to this one.
3) Sorry about the open curtain, which creates the unwanted light-bloom effect. We’ve been living in this pure white void for a few years now, because the property values are crazy low. Downside: The back yard is an endless expanse of white light without form or substance, which makes it hard to play baseball.
4) The green vessel in the middle is my now-standard dispenser for brain fuel.
5) Yes, that is a mini-fridge on the right. I hasten to add that it contains only water bottles and not food. Having food that close would lead to there being a lot more Shamus around here.

All of the consoles feed into the switch, which in turn feeds into my TV Tuner card, which lets me play in window on my PC. A TV tuner card is – as the name suggests – a card with some standard television inputs on it. You plug your console, cable TV, antenna, DVD player, VCR, or what-have-you into the card, then run the accompanying program and the resulting signal ends up in a window on the desktop. Or you can go fullscreen if you’re into the whole “immersion” thing. (And speaking of plugging in a DVD player: I’m always worried that on some level the problems I have are the result of some half-assed DRM getting in the way. Recording the footage of your Grand Theft Auto IV jumps is indistinguishable from pirating DVDs from a technological standpoint. It’s all the same connectors, the only difference is the nature of the data.)

Many people made suggestions along the lines of getting another monitor just for the consoles or somesuch, but remember that the entire point of my setup is so that I can do clean screengrabs of console games in order to supply my webcomic. Plugging the console directly into a television or monitor would surely improve the picture quality, at the expense of defeating the entire purpose of the setup. I don’t care how nice the TV is, taking pictures of a screen using a digital camera is never going to work.

The most common question from readers is, “What TV Tuner card do you use?” I’m afraid my answer wouldn’t be very useful to you, since:

  1. It’s about three years old now, which is several millennia in the lifecycle of stuff like this. (Clarification: I have owned it for about three years, and it was being discontinued when I bought it. It’s anyone’s guess how old the thing really is, in a technological sense.) The cards that replaced my card have long since been replaced, yea, even unto the third generation. Ergo, it is no longer available, anywhere.
  2. It’s not very good. There are many faults and drawbacks I’ll outline below, and I’m wary of buying a new one for fear that I’ll end up with some thing that is, for my purposes, even worse.
  3. The software that came with it is horrible.
  4. It doesn’t support HDTV, HDMI, or any of that other fancy-pants high-res stuff.
  5. Even if all of the above weren’t true, I can’t rightly remember the make or model. It came in one of those boxes that was designed to contain one of several different products, and I’ve long since forgotten which one mine is.

So if you’re really interested in this exciting world of playing a console game piped through your PC, I can’t really advise you on what to get. But I can give you a heads up on some of the drawbacks. I can’t lead you to victory, but I can let you know what it will feel like to lose.

Lag

The white dot moves back and forth along the curving path.  The object is to hit a button to make it stop within the green region.
The white dot moves back and forth along the curving path. The object is to hit a button to make it stop within the green region.
I’ve only recently discovered that there is a small degree of visual lag. I have been attributing my quick time event headaches to my declining reflexes, but it turns out that the TV tuner card is also a contributing factor. The various mini-games in Fable 2 provided fairly conclusive proof of this. The more difficult ones have a moving white dot that takes about one second to move along its path, and I have to hit the button while the dot is about 1/3 to 1/4 of the path away from its target. Making a very rough guess, I’d say I’m dealing with somewhere between 150 and 250 milliseconds of lag. That’s short enough to be hard to detect in normal circumstances, but long enough to make twitch situations a great deal more challenging.

Visual Distortion

This is a zoomed-in view of a bit of the interface in WiiFit. Note that I saved this in .PNG, so all of the distortion you see is present in all of the raw screencaps I take.
This is a zoomed-in view of a bit of the interface in WiiFit. Note that I saved this in .PNG, so all of the distortion you see is present in all of the raw screencaps I take.
The edges of stuff on screen are sort of “jaggy”. This might be a problem inherent to taking an analog TV signal and converting it to digital, or it might just mean that my TV tuner card sucks. In any case, this really limits what I can do with screenshots if I don’t want them to look like they were saved with the JPG compression set to “annihilate”.

If I could get rid of this distortion, it would greatly increase what I could do with the screenshots I get, which would make producing the comic a whole lot easier.

Awful Software

The software that came with my TV tuner card is a sad little thing called “EZ View”. If you’ve ever seen a computer that came pre-loaded with barely functional shovelware with misspelled names like “SuperNice Foto Edit Master” and “X-tra Media Organizer PRO” then you know the sort of software “engineering” I’m talking about here. It uses an unintuitive and overly elaborate skinned interface, behind which is a clunky and feature-poor program.

Frame Smearing

The TV tuner card often smears frames together, possibly as a result in differences in framerate between what the console is putting out and what the card itself wants to use. This is only slightly noticeable when I’m just playing, but the problem becomes very obvious when I start looking a individual frames.

Using composite input will simply blend two frames together. This makes it look blurry or (in the case of stuff that’s moving really fast on screen) like a double image. If I use S-Video, the differences between frames will appear on every other line, so that fast-moving items will be wreathed in scanlines. If the camera itself is panning over a scene, then it’s almost impossible to get a clean grab.

Lost Audio Channel

This is actually a perfectly reasonable and solvable problem, it’s just annoying. The TV tuner card I have is only interested in video, and the problem of getting the audio side of things working is left as an exercise for the end user. Coming out of the console you’ll generally have a yellow cable (the video) and two audio cables (the red and white cables). The yellow goes directly into the TV tuner card, and the other two go… where? I could hook them up to external speakers, but then I’d need yet another set of speakers, and if I took in-game video it wouldn’t have the audio. The better solution is to feed them into the line-in or microphone jack on the PC. Except the connectors are all wrong.

I have a little adapter that turns a single RCA connector into the familiar TRS connector, which then gets plugged into the microphone input on my computer. But this is a 1-to1 conversion. I can either have the left channel or the right one, but not both. I’ve sat down a couple of times to search around for a better solution, but it’s hard to find the right plugs in all the right genders where they don’t price-gouge you by an order of magnitude or insist that you buy ten at a time. I haven’t fixed this yet because, in the end, this is a boring shopping problem and not an interesting technological one.

I’m interested in getting a new TV tuner card that supports some sort of HD input. For those who have emailed me for advice along these lines: I’m just as lost as you are. The features that are crucial to gamers (no DRM, low latency) don’t even get a mention in the features list of most cards. An overwhelming majority of users seem to be using these things to turn their PC into a TiVo. Some cards offload a lot of the work onto the CPU. Other cards (like mine) manage to run without putting a dent in system performance. There is no real way to evaluate any of the above pitfalls until you have the thing plugged into your machine.

 


 

Post 1477

By Shamus Posted Sunday Feb 15, 2009

Filed under: Notices 27 comments

Very strange happenings.

My web host puked itself for six hours today. When my website re-appeared, I found a couple of new comments on my old post about PC Hardware being “Toast”. Some group of hardware fetishists read my post, scrolled past n comments of people who want to buy video cards but got tired of the hassle and confusion and jumped to consoles, and left comments to the effect that videocards are supposed to be complicated and you’re stupid for wanting things to be simple.

This website had become a magnet for ankle-biters of various stripes lately, mostly on age-old posts like that one. I imagine this is due to the increased visibility from all my work at The Escapist. This is a common cycle: I gain popularity, which heats up the conversation, which makes me testy, which then sheds readers due to my not-particularly-entertaining agitation. Eventually we reach some sort of equilibrium again. So, my current readership is always the maximum number of people that my personality can support.

But what was interesting is that the post is question is…

not_acceptable.jpg

Never seen that error before. Ever. I can’t see the post. I can’t edit the post. Although, I can see it listed on an index page. But this only affects post #1477. Post 1476 and post 1478 are fine and dandy, thinks.

I am mystified on many levels. What is “not acceptable”? How is just ONE php generated page gone wrong? (I’d suspect the SQL data behind it got trashed, but you can still see it listed in the index pages.) How were these other visitors able to leave comments when I can’t even see the post in question? (I might try and recover it via Google cache and re-post it. That will save the post, but break all the permalinks to it, as well as lose all of the original comments.)

Anyway, if you were trying to reach that page, you can’t, and I don’t know why. Sorry.

Strange.

 


 

Guess What Time it is?

By Shamus Posted Friday Feb 13, 2009

Filed under: Nerd Culture 23 comments

This post went live at 6:31:30PM ET on Feb 13, 2009. That’s 1234567890 in Unix time. (Seconds since January 1, 1970.)

Just thought you should know.

 


 

Experienced Points: The Final Boss

By Shamus Posted Friday Feb 13, 2009

Filed under: Game Design 49 comments

I have a new column up over at the Escapist, talking about the conflict between story and gameplay that arises at the end of a game.

Some people were concerned that Experienced Points would mean I would be writing less here on this site. That’s certainly possible. I’m probably red-lining right now as far as output goes, and a stretch of day-job overtime or illness will certainly cut into the blog, but after two weeks I seem to be able to keep up the pace without too many problems.

We’ll see how it goes. It’s pretty fun so far.