Femshep

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Jul 27, 2011

Filed under: Video Games 390 comments

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BioWare recently put up a selection of possible faces for female Commander Shepard and let the community vote on which one would be the new “official” Femshep. I haven’t seen anything detailing how this is going to work. Is this a new default preset for the in-game face modeler? Or is this a fixed model to mirror the un-editable face of default male Shepard? Or or they just asking which face they should be using on the promotional materials? Beats me.

The community voted, and chose Shepard #5. Sigh. I’m sure the vote boiled down to “which of these images does the predominantly-male userbase think is the hottest?” I’d like to see the breakdown in votes. How many people voted for “1992 Winona Ryder” Shepard #1? How many went for Janet Jackson Shepard #4? And how many preferred “Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction” Shepard #6?

Like a lot of things BioWare does, this was a really crafty effort to give players the illusion of choice. The faces are basically the same, so all we’re really choosing is the skin pigmentation and haircut. The face model was set in stone before the vote began, but this process lets them make it seem like we chose her. They gave us options for “African” and “Asian” skin coloring, but the base face shape is obviously a Caucasian woman with no variations to hint at these other possible racial backgrounds. It’s not surprising that the community chose the skin color to match the already-established face shape they were given.

BioWare gets to have their the blond-haired, blue-eyed Femshep, and if anyone complains they can just point out that Shepard #5 was “the people’s choice”.

To be fair, they’re not taking any choices away from the player or restricting the freedom they’ve given us in the past with regards to how our protagonist will look. And I’m glad to see Femshep appearing in the marketing, even if she doesn’t end up on the box. I just wanted to point out that I see what they did there, and that like most of the in-game conversation trees, we never had as much freedom it appeared at first glance.

Femshep is the least om my concerns with the game. Just about everything I’ve heard from marketing has been hammering home about how this is more “badass shooter” and less “exploration space opera”. This is less a mystery about a strange universe and more a story about a phenomonal ass-kicker and her quest to save the galaxy from its own willful stupidity. Less “Star Wars” and more “Starship Troopers”. This wouldn’t be such a bitter turn if every press release didn’t get a bunch of gushing from shooter fans (who already have a lot of titles) who can’t wait to shoot all the new guns at all the new aliens, and who don’t give a Krogen testicle about big-concept sci-fi.

The numbers are against us. As studios dump more money into graphics they have to aim their releases wider and wider to have a shot at breaking even. Since the “action shooter” fans vastly outnumber the character & lore buffs, this is simply a matter of attrition through demographics. I’ve been raging against the ridiculous race to make more, shinier pixels for years now, and this is why. This is exactly why.

 


 

Spoiler Warning S5E43: Copasheshy

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Jul 27, 2011

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 98 comments


Link (YouTube)

In case you rugrats missed it, Jack & Diane is a song reference. Despite it being a huge hit, I was only vaguely aware of the ditty at the time. I didn’t get into regular pop music all that much. Instead, I remember this station. (Seriously? There’s a Facebook memorial page for a radio station that went off the air two decades ago? Crazy.) While everyone else was listening to John Couger, Madonna, Blondie, and the Police, I was listening to Echo & the Bunnymen, New Order, Depeche Mode, and the Cure. I find it curious that current movies set in the 80’s all treat the latter as the music of the day. In my experience, the former was the actual sound of the 80’s. There were a dozen pop stations around Pittsburgh back then, and only one alternative station. A small station. Which was based in New Kensington, not Pittsburgh. And which went out of business. The soundtrack for Grosse Point Blank is revisionist history in my book.

You realize what this means, don’t you? It means I was a hipster before any of the other Spoiler Warning cast members were even born. Checkmate, babies!

What? Oh, right. New Vegas. Yeah. Fallout and stuff. Sorry.

I liked the part where Josh exploded a man just off the dining room while everyone was eating. And how nobody so much as turned their head to see who died.

 


 

Site Layout

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Jul 26, 2011

Filed under: Notices 143 comments

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As this site has aged, I’ve become increasingly reluctant to change things. When this was a new blog with 20 readers, I was free to change the theme, move stuff around, and generally go crazy. However, now with five years of archives, tens of thousands of readers, and a lot of complex functionality, it’s very, very hard to make changes without breaking something, for someone, somewhere.

Mobile users. RSS readers. New visitors. People using IE6. People surfing the web on their TV or console gaming system. Apple, Windows, and Linux users. Colorblind people. People who have disabled Javasript. People who block cookies. The site needs to be readable and usable for all of them.

I also have to keep a careful eye on CPU usage (which would be easier if I had some way of MONITORING CPU usage) on the server, because apparently this is a problem for my site. I have to use the “supercache” plugin, which means we can’t use the old theme switcher. (I used to have a system that let visitors select if they wanted white-text-on-black-background or vice versa.)

ANYWAY.

Despite all of this, I did mess with the site a bit this weekend as sort of an experiment. Wondering if some site features were ever used at all, I decided to remove them and see who noticed. Very, very few people did. But now that I’ve had my fun I thought I’d get some more general feedback:

I removed the category selector on the right. The categories are listed across the very top of the site, so that was slightly redundant. I think one person cared enough to complain about this. Do you miss it?

I removed my Twitter feed from on the right. (And just now restored it.) About a half dozen people cared enough to say something. (One of them was Josh.) I guess a lot of people who don’t use Twitter would still read my Twitter feed by coming to this site. (I’m sort of torn about Twitter. I like Google+ a lot better than either Facebook or Twitter, but it doesn’t always fill the same purpose or end up being used in the same way. But that’s a post for another time.)

Now: Is there anything on the site that needs to be more obvious / available? Do you ever find yourself looking for a feature or some information but unable to find it? I’m not promising any changes. I’m just gathering data at this point.

 


 

Spoiler Warning S5E42: You Can’t Get There From Here

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Jul 26, 2011

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 126 comments

Fair warning: This week of Spoiler Warning is really strange. I don’t know why, but every single member of the cast takes a turn at going absolutely bonkers at some point this week.


Link (YouTube)

Just wait. It only gets worse from here.

 


 

Project Frontier #18: Particle Man

By Shamus Posted Monday Jul 25, 2011

Filed under: Programming 61 comments

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I’m actually taking a break from the project this week to work on some other things, but there are a few completed features I want to cover. Let’s start with the particle engine.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Project Frontier #18: Particle Man”

 


 

Spoiler Warning: Half-Life 2: Where We’re Going, We Don’t Need… Wheels

By Shamus Posted Friday Jul 22, 2011

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 216 comments

We quote a bit of Die Hard in this episode. Trivia: Mumbles saw Die Hard for the first time ever last week. Welcome to the party, pal.


Link (YouTube)

We’ve been raving about the game, but some people are still foggy on the details of why we like Half-Life 2 so much. So here is Rutkarn’s answer, taken directly from the episode. (As nearly as I could, given the combat sounds and the other two idiots talking over him.) THIS is Half-Life 2, as made by ANY OTHER FPS STUDIO:

Here is a run down of what would have happened if any other studio had made this:

Cutscene intro: NEW YORK – You see citizens being mowed down in the streets. A narration plays over, “It is the future. Aliens have invaded the planet and begun oppressing the masses. Humankind can make no defense against it. But now, GORDON FREEMAN is being released by the G-man…”

Gordon wakes up: What? What’s going on? You’d better start giving me some answers, G-man!

GMAN: Well, Freeman… you are my pawn in this matter. I’m sending you to this place for my own reasons. Go kill some dudes.

You arrive there, and your sexilicious bikini babe companion will immediately start accompanying you, spouting wise-cracking one-lines and getting hung up on the environment while you go through the vert narrow New York streets, firing uninspiring guns and hiding behind cover.

And your enemies would be called, like… the Necro-forms. And they would all be these horrible half-human creatures that would howl and shriek.

And then the final boss would be the G-man.

Valve, thank you for not making that game.

Next week we’ll be back in the Mojave Desert. See you there.

 


 

Sherwood Showdown: Make up your own card

By Shamus Posted Thursday Jul 21, 2011

Filed under: Tabletop Games 22 comments

So you didn’t get a free copy of the game last time. If you had been luckier, it could have been yours, so you have nobody to blame but yourself.

But!

Designer Roberta Taylor is giving away another copy of the game. This time, she’s giving a shot to you luck-impaired folks by giving you an opportunity to win through creativity.

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See, every deck comes with 4 blank cards – 2 full, like the outlaws, and 2 half and half, like the leaders. And so:

To enter this giveaway, just use the comments to tell me one character you would create, and what your character's special ability is if they have one. There will be 2 winners- one randomly drawn and one Designer's choice, chosen by yours truly. So you can trust to luck, or you can imagine something fun and amazing and WOW! me to increase your chances. The contest is open to anyone living anywhere on earth, and will remain open until July 27th at 3pm Mountain Standard time.

PROTIP: Enter your entry at the Whimsy Games Site, not this one.