Errant Signal: Thief (2014)

By Shamus Posted Thursday Mar 20, 2014

Filed under: Video Games 58 comments


Link (YouTube)

The frustrating thing about this game is that it’s interesting for all the wrong reasons. I could probably do a half dozen articles on its gameplay, disjoint story, tonal deficiencies, clever ideas, mixed level design, long dev cycle, confusing approach to canon, regrettable attempts at melodrama, unintentionally comical villain, and earnest attempt to live up to its legacy as a Thief game. This isn’t a game, it’s a crime scene. “What happened to this franchise? Who did it, and why? Will they strike again?”

But there’s no reason to write those articles, because nobody cares. Nobody is playing it. Two weeks ago my column on the game got just 12 comments, which is the equivalent of having the internet nod its head reflexively while not actually listening to me as I prattle on. The game is less than a month old, and the story is over already.

Sometimes a flawed or broken game comes out and the outraged consumers can sustain a nice round of podcasts, video rants, webcomics, blog posts, and animated .gif memes. It happened for Aliens: Colonial Marines. It happened for Duke Nukem Forever. But it’s not happening here. Nobody cares. The sales figures on this thing must be abominable.

EDIT: I looked it up on VG Charts. They don’t have PC numbers, but according to their figures Thief has sold 771,036 copies so far across all console platforms. For comparison: On the PS3 this month, it sold less than Skyrim.

 


 

Skyrim EP16: Wolves Aren’t Evil

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Mar 19, 2014

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 118 comments


Link (YouTube)

Imma spoil this for you, for your own good: Josh totally murders Lydia in this episode, and it takes a couple of minutes before anyone realizes it happened. Re-watching this now I knew it was coming, and I laughed. I mean mourned. Not laughed. I don’t know why I said laugh. That would be terrible. Anyway, watch for it. It’s all the more hilarious poignant that nobody knows it’s happening.

If you want to see the footage of ragdoll “physics” in Thief Deadly Shadows, Chris put together a nice collection of them here.

 


 

Experienced Points: Cloning is Good for You

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Mar 18, 2014

Filed under: Column 76 comments

I just want to say a few words in defense of cloning. I mean game cloning. Not biological cloning. I don’t know anything about biological cloning, except for that one terrible TNG episode where the writing was horrible and the cloning debate was so goofy and muddled it sounded like two Amish guys arguing Mac vs. PC.

Where was I? Oh, videogame cloning, right.

Of course, all of this stems from the recent Candy Crush controversy. On Facebook Jennifer Snow pointed out that King was kind of obligated to defend their Candy trademark, or they could risk losing it. That’s an interesting wrinkle to the discussion that I didn’t touch on in the main article (maybe I should have) so let’s talk about it here:

What I think King SHOULD have done is to trademark “Candy Crush”. That way if some idiot came out with “Candy Crush Story” or “Candy Crush Adventure”, then King could take them to court and I think most people would be okay with that. But instead they trademarked “Candy”, meaning that nobody anywhere is ever allowed to have the word candy in their game, and then King is “obligated” to sue everyone who tries. That’s completely unreasonableThe fact that they were GRANTED trademarks on common English words is also part of the problem.. And then they trademarked “Saga” and went after completely unrelated games in unrelated genres where the claim of “market confusion” is ludicrous. They’re not trademark trolls because they’re defending their trademarks, they’re trademark trolls because they grabbed broad, overreaching trademarks and then enforced them way beyond what I think would be considered a reasonable requirement.

King has lost / given up one of these trademark fights in the US. But they’re still holding onto it abroad. Here’s hoping they either clean up their act or get spanked in court.

 


 

Diecast #49: Broken Age, OOPS FEMINISM, Dark Souls

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Mar 18, 2014

Filed under: Diecast 367 comments

So let’s have a nice, calm, non-controversial week talking abo- aw damn it someone mentioned feminism again, didn’t they? Let me get my crash helmet on.

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Hosts: Rutskarn, Mumbles, Josh, Chris, and Shamus.

Show notes:

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Diecast #49: Broken Age, OOPS FEMINISM, Dark Souls”

 


 

Crowdsourcing Advice: Result

By Shamus Posted Monday Mar 17, 2014

Filed under: Personal 101 comments

So last month I mentioned that my son’s laptop died, and I asked for some advice on what to get and what to avoid. We got some good feedback and got him a reasonable machine without breaking our budget. (Some people even threw a few bucks at us via paypal to help with the purchase. Thanks!) I didn’t think about it again until last week when someone emailed me and asked for a follow-up. It didn’t even occur to me that I’d sort of left you hanging.

So for the curious, here is what happened…

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Crowdsourcing Advice: Result”

 


 

Hangout March 16: It’s Over!

By Shamus Posted Sunday Mar 16, 2014

Filed under: Notices 33 comments

Josh is streaming right now. We’re playing Elder Scrolls Online. We’ll probably be talking about everything BUT ESO, according to tradition and / or prophesy.

EDIT:

It’s Over. If you’re wondering, here’s what you missed:

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Hangout March 16: It’s Over!”

 


 

Hangout March 16th: The Elder Scrolls Online

By Josh Posted Friday Mar 14, 2014

Filed under: Notices 60 comments

So this morning I was talking with Twenty Sided regular Varewulf about The Elder Scrolls Online and how there’s a beta event going on this weekend. And I decided, “Hey, everyone else is checking this out, I guess I should too.”

Josh is writing this post by the way, in case you were momentarily confused by the idea of Shamus suggesting he should check out a game he already posted his impressions about a month ago. I should bug him to bring back the author portraits again.

Anyway, long story short, I found a key and I’ll be playing this weekend. And since we haven’t done the whole hangout stream in a while, I figured, why not invite everyone to watch?

So we’ll be doing a hangout on Sunday, March 16th, starting at about 2 PM Pacific/5 PM Eastern. And I think (feel free to correct me if I’m wrong) that since the continuing bad practice known as daylight savings time has already occurred in the US but is still weeks away in Europe (because why would we try to make this easy?) that translates to 9 PM Britain/10 PM France/Netherlands/Scandanavia/Mordor/etc.

As with the past few hangouts, we’ll be doing it on the usual Twitch channel.

It’ll be great. Shamus might be there. Jarenth might be there. Other people might be there. Hell, I might even be there.