{"id":731,"date":"2006-10-30T17:02:21","date_gmt":"2006-10-30T22:02:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=731"},"modified":"2006-10-30T17:03:40","modified_gmt":"2006-10-30T22:03:40","slug":"uwe-boll-vs-the-movies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=731","title":{"rendered":"Uwe Boll vs. The Movies"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"?p=724\">I tossed some insults at Uwe Boll the other day<\/a>, but Cineris has a better idea than boxing Use Boll: <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cineris.org\/blog\/2006\/10\/27\/a-challenge-to-uwe-boll\/\">Challenge him to a movie-making competition<\/a>, which would be a contest where he could not possibly win.<\/p>\n<p>He hasn&#8217;t made any movies about games that I care about.  I&#8217;ve never seen <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0383222\/\">BloodRayne<\/a> before. I played <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0369226\/\">Alone in the Dark<\/a>, but I was never very attached to the game itself.  <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0400426\/\">Far Cry<\/a> was already a stupid game when it came to the story and characters, so I don&#8217;t know how much worse he&#8217;ll be able to make it.  <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0460780\/\">Dungeon Siege<\/a> was more or less a plotless game of stats building and loot harvesting, so I don&#8217;t know how anyone could make a movie based on the game in any meaningful way.  If you can make a movie from that, then <em>Microsoft Flight Simulator: The Movie<\/em> can&#8217;t be far off. <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0486640\/\">Postal<\/a> is stupid on purpose for comedic effect.  I wonder if he realizes that.  <\/p>\n<p>So he hasn&#8217;t wronged any titles that I care about.  My real fear is that he <em>will<\/em>.  Sooner or later he&#8217;ll get his grubby mitts on the rights to some game close to my heart, and there won&#8217;t be anything I can do but watch my beloved story get turned into a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.rottentomatoes.com\/p\/uwe_boll\/\">single-digit scoring movie on the Tomatometer<\/a>.   System Shock, Myst, Dues Ex, and The Longest Journey come to mind.  <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I tossed some insults at Uwe Boll the other day, but Cineris has a better idea than boxing Use Boll: Challenge him to a movie-making competition, which would be a contest where he could not possibly win. He hasn&#8217;t made any movies about games that I care about. I&#8217;ve never seen BloodRayne before. I played [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-731","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-rants"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/731","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=731"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/731\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=731"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=731"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=731"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}