{"id":5787,"date":"2009-11-07T07:00:30","date_gmt":"2009-11-07T11:00:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=5787"},"modified":"2009-11-07T09:53:53","modified_gmt":"2009-11-07T13:53:53","slug":"full-life-consequences","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=5787","title":{"rendered":"Full Life Consequences"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Here is a Saturday morning meme for you:<\/p>\n<p>Back in 2006, fanfic writer Squirrelking authored a Half-Life story about John Freeman, brother of Gordon. Squirrelking had only recently learned [a bit of] English and so the writing was perhaps a bit&#8230; unpolished. (The other problems with the story we can probably attribute to youth, although his age isn&#8217;t known.) It&#8217;s generally not nice to laugh at people struggling to learn a new language, and it&#8217;s even worse to laugh at young people who are trying to learn to be creative, but the internet is a cruel place and Squirrelking&#8217;s unfortunate writing was wickedly, unintentionally, <em>hilarious<\/em>. It achieved a sort of Ed Wood-esqe following of people who were intrigued by the perfect awfulness of the work and celebrated it through collaboration.  <\/p>\n<p>From there, a very minor and short-lived meme was spawned.  Someone did a dramatic reading of the thing.  Then someone else did an animation of it using Garry&#8217;s Mod:<\/p>\n<p><table class='nomargin' cellspacing='0' width='100%' cellpadding='0' align='center' border='0'><tr><td><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"1024\" height=\"576\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/OHxyZaZlaOs\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen class=\"embed\"><\/iframe><br\/><small><a href='http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=OHxyZaZlaOs'>Link (YouTube)<\/a><\/small><\/td><\/tr><\/table><\/p>\n<p>I sincerely hope Squirrelking is a ten year old from (say) Zimbabwe and not (as we fear) an eighteen year old from the United States. <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;And the pants were dead.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Indeed, Squirrelking, indeed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Here is a Saturday morning meme for you: Back in 2006, fanfic writer Squirrelking authored a Half-Life story about John Freeman, brother of Gordon. Squirrelking had only recently learned [a bit of] English and so the writing was perhaps a bit&#8230; unpolished. (The other problems with the story we can probably attribute to youth, although [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5787","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dream-cast"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5787","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5787"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5787\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5787"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5787"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5787"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}