{"id":50613,"date":"2020-08-24T06:00:46","date_gmt":"2020-08-24T10:00:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=50613"},"modified":"2020-08-24T02:32:47","modified_gmt":"2020-08-24T06:32:47","slug":"ding-49","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=50613","title":{"rendered":"Ding 49!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Well, this is mildly terrifying. This will either be the last year of my life that I spend under 50, or the last year of my life. I&#8217;m not excited by either prospect.<\/p>\n<p>In the younger days of this site I had lots of stories about <a href=\"?p=12687\">my personal life<\/a>. These days it feels like all of my personal anecdotes are health-related.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><i>&#8220;Man, I&#8217;m having a great day! My knees hurt less than usual, I nearly got a full night of sleep, my blood pressure is down from &#8220;life-threatening&#8221; to &#8220;a serious problem&#8221;, and I&#8217;m gaining weight slower than I was yesterday. I figure if I watch my meds and eat only salads, I can probably survive to the end of the week!&#8221;<\/i>\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m kidding, I&#8217;m kidding.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I never have days that good anymore.<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>For my birthday, I&#8217;m getting an office chair. The one I&#8217;m sitting on now is fairly new, we paid a decent amount for it, and it came from IKEA. So it should be good, right? I was expecting something strong, durable, and comfortable. Instead it feels like a $45 garbage chair from Walmart. It&#8217;s hard. It wobbles. It creaks incessantly at the slightest change in position, despite constant oiling.\u00a0This might be one of the worst office chairs I&#8217;ve ever owned, actually. <\/p>\n<p>Since I&#8217;m nearing 50, the obvious thing to do is get one of those hip gamer chairs that all the kids are using. I&#8217;m getting one supposedly custom-built to my proportions. The downside is that I have to wait another month on account of it being a custom-build. A whole month! That&#8217;s <sup>1<\/sup>\/<sub>12<\/sub>th of the way between today and my 50th birthday! I might not even live that long!<\/p>\n<p>Wait, no. I refuse to die before I get to play Cyberpunk 2077.\u00a0After that? No promises<span class='snote' title='1'>I&#8217;ve given up waiting for Half-Life 3, though.<\/span>.<\/p>\n<p>Now I&#8217;d like to leave a message for my past self, just in case he gets that whole time travel thing worked out. Then again, <strong>I<\/strong> never figured it out so&#8230; whatever.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Dear Shamus from 3 months ago:<\/p>\n<p>So you&#8217;ve discovered that you have hypertension. It&#8217;s scary, I know. I&#8217;m sure you&#8217;ll do great in the exercise and weight loss department. You&#8217;ve got <a href=\"?p=50219\">a big move<\/a> coming up, and I can promise you that it&#8217;s going to kick your ass.<\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s the thing: You&#8217;re an idiot. You&#8217;ve decided to cut most of the salt from your diet, but you&#8217;ve got it in your head that reading labels is for weenies. You think that you can tell salty items from non-salty ones by tasting. This is tragically misguided.<\/p>\n<p>I don&#8217;t know what the deal is, but the salt content is barely related to how much salt you can <b>taste<\/b>. Those garlic chips Heather used to get you? Yeah, you gave those up because they were &#8220;way too salty&#8221;. Check the label, genius. They have a teenie tiny bit of salt and the rest is all garlic powder. Yes, the flavor is overpowering, but it&#8217;s not nearly as salty as your taste buds are telling you.<\/p>\n<p>On the other hand, that lunchmeat? You know the stuff that must not have any salt because you can barely taste it? Read <b>that<\/b> label. ONE slice of that is a whole day of salt. And you&#8217;re about to eat TWO of them in a sitting. Sometimes more than once a day! It&#8217;s possible your salt intake is about to go UP because you&#8217;re going to be thinking with your taste buds.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Just read the label and don&#8217;t spend the next three months sabotaging your own efforts to get your blood pressure under control.<\/p>\n<p>Good luck, kid. Try not to screw it up this time,<\/p>\n<p>Shamus<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>If anyone is curious, the resulting foolishness looks like this:<\/p>\n<p><div class='imagefull'><img src='https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/images\/hypertension2020.jpg' width=100% alt='Man, if these numbers get any worse I&apos;m going to have to stop tracking them!' title='Man, if these numbers get any worse I&apos;m going to have to stop tracking them!'\/><\/div><div class='mouseover-alt'>Man, if these numbers get any worse I&apos;m going to have to stop tracking them!<\/div><\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve been taking my BP every morning since we discovered the problem back in June. The graph above is my systolic pressure.<\/p>\n<p>I started paying attention to package labels a couple days ago, so it&#8217;s not showing up on the chart yet. I should probably go to the doctor, but my hypertension paranoia is very close to my COVID-19 paranoia. I don&#8217;t want to sit in a waiting room with a bunch\u00a0 of sick people, I don&#8217;t want to wait for a month to get an appointment, I don&#8217;t want to call and make the appointment, and also I just don&#8217;t want to<span class='snote' title='2'>Don&#8217;t worry. If cutting the salt doesn&#8217;t help I&#8217;ll make the appointment.<\/span>.<\/p>\n<p>The good news is I <b>feel<\/b> fine. Despite all of the silly old-man complaining at the top of the post, I&#8217;m not actually hurting. I&#8217;m down 10 lbs since June and I&#8217;m exercising every day. Honestly if it wasn&#8217;t for these blood pressure numbers I&#8217;d be really happy with this giant sack of meat I use to chauffeur my brain around.<\/p>\n<p>No Diecast this week. I spent the weekend finishing up a video and doing some more programming.<\/p>\n<p>Now if you&#8217;ll excuse me, I&#8217;m going to have some birthday cake and watch the Cyberpunk 2077 launch countdown timer for a bit.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Well, this is mildly terrifying. This will either be the last year of my life that I spend under 50, or the last year of my life. I&#8217;m not excited by either prospect. In the younger days of this site I had lots of stories about my personal life. These days it feels like all [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[610],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-50613","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-landmarks"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50613","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=50613"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50613\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":50629,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50613\/revisions\/50629"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=50613"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=50613"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=50613"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}