<\/div>If you visit Dr. Nakamoto in the Kadara slums, he’ll tell you that when he came to Kadara he discovered a kind of “bacteria” that had antibioticAs in “penicillin” not “biotic space powers”.<\/span> properties. But then someone discovered that at high doses it was an addictive psychoactive drug. Sloane began producing the drug to make money and solidify her power. <\/p>\n So then Dr. Nakamoto asks us to “get the formula back” from her, so that he can use it to treat his patients here in the slums.<\/p>\n Dude! You JUST SAID it was a naturally-occurring bacteria, and now you’re calling it a “formula”?<\/em><\/p>\n Both statements were part of the same linear dialog. But even if we ignore that as more of this writer’s careless mashing together of random science words, this still doesn’t make sense. Since Dr. Nakamoto invented this formula \/ discovered this bacteria, he ought to still have access to it. Either it’s a bacteria and he can just find more wherever he got the original stuff, or it’s a formula and he ought to still HAVE it. Did his hard drive die? Even at that, he should be able to remember what he did to create it the first time. It’s not like he poured years of research into discovering a complex new compound. This isn’t some obscure knowledge that’s been lost to the mists of time. Going by the established timeline, he apparently stumbled on this bacteria sometime in the last couple of months. The entire premise comes off as childish.<\/p>\n But fine. We drive to the other side of the map to Sloane’s drug lab so we can-<\/p>\n Hang on. Why is Sloane’s drug lab so far from the city!? Why wouldn’t she keep it safe within the walls of the fortified city she rules with an iron fist!? In our world, drug labs are hidden because they’re illegal. But Sloane is both dictator and drug dealer, so that’s not a problem for her. <\/p>\n Back in Mass Effect 1 there were quests that just involved walking around and talking to people in adjacent rooms, but apparently the Ubisoft-inspired design means we need to drive across the map for every pissant fetch quest. <\/p>\n Once we get there, the drug lab is guarded by mooks. Once they’re all dead, we talk to the doctor running the place. She begs us not to “take” the formula, because then she won’t have it. If she can’t make drugs for Sloane, then Sloane will kill her.<\/p>\n But… isn’t this a formula? Like, a recipe? How is it possible that it can only be “owned” by one person at a time? Assuming you’re not planning on starting a war with Sloane, then the most reasonable course of action ought allow BOTH sides access to the formula. Sloane can make her drugs and Dr. Nakamoto can treat the poor sick people. Again, the choices in this game push you to unreasonable extremes and don’t allow you to ask reasonable questions. It’s like you’re not supposed to think about the mechanics of the decisions you’re making and the only point for this quest is to just dispense Paragon or Renegade points. Except… this game doesn’t have<\/em> Paragon or Renegade points.<\/p>\n My brain hurts now, but I’ll give the writer credit they don’t deserve and assume that the “formula” is actually a cell culture<\/a>? Or something? But then at the end of the conversation Ryder “takes” the formula using her multitool. So I guess it’s a formula after all, and Ryder is just being an asshole and erasing it off the lady’s computer and the lady stupidly doesn’t have backups of this information that’s apparently critical to her survival? And I guess Sloane doesn’t have backups even though her economy depends on it?<\/p>\n After the conversation you see that the drug actually comes from plants that are growing in these hydroponic containers around the room. And we don’t take any of the plants with us. But, if it’s a plant then what did I just steal off the computer? And how will Dr. Nakamoto make more if he doesn’t have access to the plant or any sort of equipment to cultivate it?<\/p>\n The game pretends like taking the formula from Sloane and giving it to Dr. Nakamoto is the nice thing to do, but what’s to stop Sloane from just taking it again? She’s going to notice that someone knocked over her drug lab and that Dr. Nakamoto is making medicine again. She’s a magnificent dumbass, but she’s at least smart enough to realize these two facts are related. Giving the formula to Dr. Nakamoto ought to result in him turning up dead in a couple of weeks and Sloane resuming selling her drugs to all the jobless and penniless losers she keeps in the slums. <\/p>\n So the drug is either a bacteria, or a recipe, or a plant. This is a quest with two characters, three linear dialogs, and one binary choice. This is the simplest possible framework for a sidequest. This is “Baby’s First Sidequest”. Talk to A to get the quest, talk to B to obtain the item, and return to A to resolve it. Yet somehow the writer couldn’t even manage to keep this ultra-simple scenario straight. The premise was nuts, the morality was hopelessly confused, and the dialog contradicted itself multiple times, even within the same linear conversation.<\/p>\n Sure, you can construct your own explanation that the “formula” is the process by which you harvest a bacteria that only grows on a particular plant. And I suppose if you keep writing, you’ll eventually hammer out a version of Mass Effect Andromeda script that’s worth turning into a AAA game. I just wish someone had done that before they recorded all this dialog.<\/p>\n Even if we ignore the nonsensical elements, this choice is completely uninteresting because it ends in a binary decision with an obvious and objectively correct answer. Choices are supposed to be interesting. They’re supposed to make us choose between two things we want, or perhaps trying to figure out the lesser of two evils. But this quest has a choice between the right answer and a wrong one. Gosh, do I give the drug to the selfless doctor treating the poor in the slums so he can save more lives, or do I leave it here so the tyrannical and predatory Sloane can continue to amass wealth and power for herself and turn this planet into even more of a shithole? What a conundrum!<\/i> This is like Mass Effect 1 offering us the choice between “Kill the Rachni Queen” and “Help Rachni Queen kill Liara”. <\/p>\n Just to make the whole thing as wrongheaded as possible: Once you enter the drug lab, Dr. Farenth is standing right in front of you. Once you initiate the conversation with her, you MUST choose to either take the formula or allow her to keep it. You can’t end the conversation and explore the room before making your decision. Since there is incriminating evidence against Dr. Farenth on datapads around the room, this design choice is unforgivable. The game presents you with a (dumb, nonsensical) mystery about who really invented Oblivion and why, but it won’t even allow you to gather all the facts before railroading you into a ridiculous binary decision.<\/p>\n Why would you bother wasting resources creating a choice that’s obviously dumb and runs directly counter to the player’s goals? Why spend resources on that dialog? The only people who will choose this are the ones who click through the conversation without listening and don’t bother reading the datapads where all the villains explicitly announce their villainous nature in their one-paragraph diaries. <\/p>\n This sort of incoherency runs throughout the game. This would be bad enough in regular fiction, but for the nerdy sci-fi genre this is just shameful. <\/p>\n At one point you check the “security camera footage” at the security station on the Nexus, and it apparently has random footage of two people meeting in the wilderness on a planet on the other side of the cluster. <\/p>\n In another quest SAM claims he’s trying to trace a signal, but then he thinks he’s somehow “repairing” a signal, before he claims he’s been “decrypting” the signal. <\/p>\n In another quest someone tells you that our communications are getting a lot of interference. They tell you to make sure the Kett aren’t “tapping” our communications. Those are two different concepts. Am I supposed to invent some headcanon based on quantum communications where passive surveillance causes detectable interference, or is the writer just playing “fetch quest Mad Libs” with random science words?<\/p>\n The main quest has you looking for a “transponder”. Once you have it in your hand, it acts like a two-way radio. Somehow using it to call the Kett tells you where the Kett flagship is. (A transponder broadcasts its OWN location. If you’re holding a transponder, then you’re telling the Kett where YOU are, not the other way around!)<\/p>\n At another point you need to free up some electrical power on a spaceship. There’s a machine using tons of energy. An Asari woman tries to shut it down. She tells you, “I tried unplugging it, but… nothing.” If you’re interested, you can see a livestream of my reaction to that scenario<\/a>.<\/p>\n I get that we’re not doing details-first sci-fi now. I’m not insisting that someone make all of these things scientifically accurate. If you want to use random bullshit magic technology then just make up some silly science words like “Harbulary Batteries” and stick to that. But the game keeps showing its technology is just stuff we’re already familiar with and then depicting it doing nonsensical things. It’s like an episode of Star Trek written by someone who just got blackout drunk.<\/p>\n It’s tempting to make a few mean-spirited comments about the lack of skill and \/ or intelligence on the part of the writer, but at this point that feels like a weak explanation for what we’re seeing. Anyone capable of forming complete sentences ought to understand the conceptual difference between bacteria, a recipe, and a plant. Everyone capable of using a computer understands what happens when you unplug something from an electrical outlet. Everyone over the age of six ought to understand that security footage can only exist for locations where security cameras have been installed. <\/p>\n If you’re smart enough to get hired by BioWare and not kill yourself using the coffeemaker in the break room, then you have the capacity to avoid making these kinds of blunders. <\/p>\n
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<\/div>Incoherent<\/h3>\n
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