while the marker is still moving. <\/em><\/p>\nAccidentally jump when the marker’s representing your standing distance, you’ll overshoot and die.<\/p>\n
Accidentally jump too soon, you’ll undershoot and die.<\/p>\n
Let go of the jump button a second after you let go of the move button, you’ll instantly revert to standing momentum, undershoot, and die.<\/p>\n
Accidentally wait too long and let the marker reset, you’ll undershoot and die.<\/p>\n
Accidentally jump while side-strafing so you can see where you’ll land with momentum, you’ll land too far to the side and die.<\/p>\n
Jump at the exact correct moment after running to the proper position and releasing at the proper time without flying off the platform or aiming incorrectly, and you’ll probably land two feet short anyway and get stuck on the platform edge.<\/p>\n
In the end, I finally manage to stick the landing. Just barely. By accident. On the farthest platform. <\/em>At this point, I discover that there’s another platform that’s supposed to come up from the ground before I can reach the end of the jumping puzzle, way <\/em>on the other side of the room.<\/p>\nPrepare for a tale of incredulous riddles, hidden artifacts, and bewitching conversations with scantily-clad NPCs as I attempt to raise this uncooperative landing. Then huff in disappointment, because instead I just kill a Jumping potion and hurl myself an unsportsmanlike distance on account of my hypercharged stats and Jump skill. Which is not without its aggravations, since it means all of the above trials plus an unusual jump distance and trying not to let a potion with a completely unknown duration wear off, but it’s less work than figuring out which statue I’m supposed to tickle to get out of here the correct way.<\/p>\n
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The standard leap-of-faith landing committee: an enemy to smack you back of the ledge.<\/div><\/p>\n
Oh, fine, I’ll look it up. One second.<\/p>\n
…<\/p>\n
Looks like there was a wheel in that underwater complex. Actually, it was in one of the major pools you enter the complex from<\/em>. I literally would have found it if I’d gone right instead of left. I’d have never even realized what it did.<\/p>\nSo, this was more work. <\/em>But it was also more of a pain in the ass, and at the end of the day, that’s what really matters.<\/p>\nAbout twenty seconds later, a skeleton breaks my cuirass. The fortunate thing is that there are items in this game called Coffers of Restoration that a few scrolls I’ve read have alleged can repair items. I even tried to do so right before the equipment glitch kicked in. I was unsuccessful at repairing anything, but I was very <\/em>successful at convincing myself that this was what was causing items not to equip properly.<\/p>\n(It wasn’t.)<\/p>\n
The upshot is that I threw them all out and have no way of salvaging my armor. Thankfully, the universe’s armorers took pity on me, and in the very next chest I find a brand new helmet<\/em>. And it matches my newly-revealed shirt perfectly!<\/p>\nBehold, our fearless, bloodsoaked modern gladiator:<\/p>\n
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LATER THIS WEEK: CAPTAIN CAHMEL AND THE ISLAND OF CRAPPY TREASURE<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"So according to my map, those watery tunnels of questionable hazard have brought me to…Somewhere in the Battlespire. I don’t know what I expected, but a guy can hope. To be more specific, “Somewhere” is a cavern full of unkillable wraiths, projectile spam, impassable magically-locked gateways, and wandering skeletons. None of them are faster than […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[242],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33374","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-lets-play"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33374","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=33374"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33374\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=33374"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=33374"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=33374"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
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