{"id":16959,"date":"2012-08-15T13:32:09","date_gmt":"2012-08-15T18:32:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=16959"},"modified":"2012-08-15T13:37:37","modified_gmt":"2012-08-15T18:37:37","slug":"mass-effect-3-part-1-we-fight-or-we-doy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=16959","title":{"rendered":"Mass Effect 3 Part 1: We Fight or We Doy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>This is the 300th episode of <a href=\"?page_id=16386\" title=\"Spoiler Warning Index\">Spoiler Warning<\/a>. Seriously. We&#8217;ve made <em>three hundred<\/em> of these things. That is a lot of spoiled stuff. This seems like a great time to begin our long-delayed Mass Effect 3 season. <\/p>\n<p><table class='nomargin' cellspacing='0' width='100%' cellpadding='0' align='center' border='0'><tr><td><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"1024\" height=\"576\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/quiGpSh02yA\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen class=\"embed\"><\/iframe><br\/><small><a href='http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=quiGpSh02yA'>Link (YouTube)<\/a><\/small><\/td><\/tr><\/table><\/p>\n<p>I should probably apologize for this start to the series. Often people accuse us of &#8220;just looking for stuff to nitpick&#8221;, which isn&#8217;t really fair or true. We&#8217;re usually looking for stuff to <em>talk about<\/em>, and sometimes those things are positive and sometimes they&#8217;re negative. But in our first block of episodes, I seem to remember spending about two hours hating the game and whinging on about Every Damn Little Thing.<\/p>\n<p>What happened is this:<\/p>\n<p><!--more-->Josh, Chris, and I spent about forty-five minutes trying to play Mass Effect 3 multiplayer and having our efforts thwarted by the awful interface, stupid Origin problems, bafflingly long menu loads, dumb DLC policies, and glitches. Before that, I&#8217;d been playing pub games with strangers and dying again and again to the AWESUM BUTTIN LOL that made me sprint when I wanted cover, do little somersault rolls when I wanted to revive a teammate, and enter cover when I was trying to run away or push a button. So I was in a bad mood. As a bonus, I had an eyeball-obliterating headache and I was getting sick. <\/p>\n<p>So, I entered our first Mass Effect 3 episode in an extreme state of agitation. I was mad at everyone and everything, BioWare in particular. I think it would be fair to say that I was looking for stuff to complain about, since that was pretty much my mental state at the time. I dominated a lot of the conversation and most of it was complaining incoherently about small stuff. <\/p>\n<p>This was all very unfortunate, since Mass Effect 3 has a few awful, terrible, no-good, Very Bad problems, but none of them were the things I was bitching about. In fact, I spent so much time complaining about trivial things that I missed the couple of important or noteworthy things.<\/p>\n<p>Case in point: Shepard&#8217;s big &#8220;We fight or we die&#8221; one-liner. We&#8217;ve been waiting for two whole games for this moment, and our big speech boils down to:<\/p>\n<p><center><br \/>\nADMIRAL DUM DUM:<br \/>\nCommander Shepard! We&#8217;ve fallen out of an airplane with no parachute! What to we do?<\/p>\n<p>(Thoughtful, dramatic pause.)<\/p>\n<p>SHEPARD:<br \/>\nWe hit the ground or we die!<br \/>\n<\/center><\/p>\n<p>So&#8230; yeah. I was in a bad mood, complained too much, and kind of started us off on the wrong foot. Sorry about that. If it makes you feel any better, I hated making it more than you&#8217;ll hate watching it. And if that&#8217;s not a ringing endorsement I don&#8217;t know what is.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This is the 300th episode of Spoiler Warning. Seriously. We&#8217;ve made three hundred of these things. That is a lot of spoiled stuff. This seems like a great time to begin our long-delayed Mass Effect 3 season. Link (YouTube) I should probably apologize for this start to the series. Often people accuse us of &#8220;just [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[188],"tags":[71,208],"class_list":["post-16959","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spoilerwarning","tag-mass-effect","tag-spoiler-warning"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16959","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16959"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16959\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16959"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16959"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16959"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}