{"id":10802,"date":"2011-02-23T09:27:13","date_gmt":"2011-02-23T14:27:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=10802"},"modified":"2011-02-23T11:47:13","modified_gmt":"2011-02-23T16:47:13","slug":"click-on-felicia-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/?p=10802","title":{"rendered":"Click on Felicia Day"},"content":{"rendered":"

So I went to the Dragon Age 2 site to download the demo. I’m too busy<\/a> to actually play the game, but, you know… Dragon Age<\/em>. I got through the age verification thing by lying and telling it I was still 30. Stupid thing believed me. You know, if we’re going to expect these age verification things to work we need to stop teaching math in schools. I’m just saying, if we continue to recklessly teach our children to subtract one number from another, then they’ll be able to figure out how to lie to a website about their age. If that happens, then children of absent, uninvolved, and apathetic parents will be able to access violent videogames. Imagine the damage those kids will experience. I mean, the damage from the game, not the damage from having screwed up parents. Hang on. What were we talking about again?<\/p>\n

Oh yeah. Dragon Age 2. Right. Thanks.<\/p>\n

So anyway, I was on the website when I saw this:<\/p>\n

da2_felicia_day.jpg<\/td><\/tr><\/table><\/p>\n

A menu option labeled Felicia Day<\/a>. What is this for?<\/p>\n


\nINT. BOB'S HOUSE, DAY<\/p>\n

BOB is sitting at his computer when he hears a KNOCK at the door. He answers it, and FELICIA DAY is standing there.<\/p>\n

BOB:
\nWow! Felicia Day! It's really you!<\/p>\n

FELICIA DAY:
\n(Annoyed) Yeah. Hi.<\/p>\n

BOB:
\nAwesome.<\/p>\n

FELICIA DAY:
\nSo what did you want?<\/p>\n

BOB:
\nWant? I don't...<\/p>\n

FELICIA DAY:
\nYeah. Why did you send for me?<\/p>\n

BOB:
\nSend for you? I didn't.<\/p>\n

(BOB looks around, confused.)<\/p>\n

FELICIA DAY:
\nSo you didn't click the Felicia Day button on the Dragon Age 2 site?<\/p>\n

BOB:
\nOh yeah! I remember doing that.<\/p>\n

FELICIA DAY:
\nOkay then. What do you need? Just make it quick. I'm supposed to be in LA to do this TV show this afternoon.<\/p>\n

BOB:
\nI don't really need anything. I just wanted to know what the button did.<\/p>\n

FELICIA DAY:
\nYou didn't know what it did? Don't you think the label \"Felicia Day\" was a bit of a giveaway? What did you think it would do? Send for Nathan Fillion?<\/p>\n

BOB:
\nWell, I don't need anything. I guess I shouldn't have clicked it.<\/p>\n

FELICIA DAY:
\nI was in the middle of something, asshole.<\/em><\/p>\n

BOB:
\nSorry.<\/p>\n

INT. BOB'S OFFICE, NIGHT<\/p>\n

BOB is using his computer again. He's writing an apology to FELICIA DAY. He goes to the File menu to save his work, and the menu options are: NEW, Open, SAVE, SAVE AS, NATHAN FILLION, and EXIT. <\/p>\n

BOB:
\nOhh. I wonder what that does?<\/p>\n

END
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So I went to the Dragon Age 2 site to download the demo. I’m too busy to actually play the game, but, you know… Dragon Age. I got through the age verification thing by lying and telling it I was still 30. Stupid thing believed me. You know, if we’re going to expect these age […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[120],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10802","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-videogames"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10802","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10802"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10802\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10802"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10802"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shamusyoung.com\/twentysidedtale\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10802"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}