The Last of Us EP27: Quest For Hats

By Shamus Posted Friday Nov 28, 2014

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 54 comments


Link (YouTube)

Man, last episode I totally missed the part where two girls lift a mountain of rubble, and this episode I go on an insane rant about a totally realistic door. I was thinking of municipal breaker bars used in stuff like schools, where it’s supposed to be impossible for people to end up locked inside. However, there are indeed lots of doors that can be locked to keep people in, and if you look closely this is such a door. The vertical metal rods are basically like a really long bolt lock that goes into a little opening in the floor.

I’m off my game here. I blame it on the fact that all of this is new to me and I can’t properly watch, listen, discuss, and nitpick simultaneously. I spent the entire episode listening to half of what the cast was saying and reading half the dialog and catching other bits of dialog in audio and being completely confused.

We’re taking next week off from Spoiler Warning. (The holidays have made it so we can’t record the show.) Hopefully between now and the next time we record I can find time to watch Left Behind on YouTube so I can do my job properlyAssuming there is a “proper” way to complain about videogames. for the rest of the DLC.

Going by what we’ve seen, I’d say I like the look of Left Behind a lot more than the core game. More puzzles, more zombies, more character development, and less manshoots.

 


 

The Last of Us EP26: John Sheeperson

By Shamus Posted Thursday Nov 27, 2014

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 76 comments


Link (YouTube)

Dear indies: please get Chris to be a voice actor in your videogame and have him do that “I did a wheelie on a horse” voice. I don’t even care what the game is about. Have him play Abraham Lincoln with that voice. Odysseus. A Japanese schoolgirl. It doesn’t matter. Just do it. It’ll be an instant GOTY.

Also, I apologize for not completely losing my mind and going on an insane tirade at the 24 minute mark when two teenage girls lift ten tons of rubble with a tiny metal bar. AND THEY CONTINUE TO BE ABLE TO TALK WHILE DOING SO. I got caught up in trying to multi-task so I could recount old TNG episodes and also follow the subtitles, and I failed to be your avatar of indignant outrage over absurdities.

I’ll try to do better next time. (Spoiler: I will fail. Seriously. In the very next episode.)

This is a review of Threshold, the worst episode of Star Trek ever made. It really is an abomination.

 


 

Happy Thanksgiving!

By Shamus Posted Thursday Nov 27, 2014

Filed under: Rants 117 comments

It’s that time of the year when we count our blessings and overeat. But not in that order. And maybe more the second thing than the first. And then we go shopping.

In any case, I’ve compiled a list of everything I’m thankful for:

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Happy Thanksgiving!”

 


 

The Last of Us EP25: Hey Hey We’re The Monkeys

By Shamus Posted Wednesday Nov 26, 2014

Filed under: Spoiler Warning 75 comments


Link (YouTube)

For the uneducated philistines in the audience, this episode title is actually a highbrow literary reference.

So this might be the most positive season of Spoiler Warning so far. Really we just have a couple of gripes that get brought up again and again. Like the raiders. Speaking of which:

Let’s look at this encounter from the raider’s perspective: How stupid are these guys? They’re searching a building with a conspicuous flashlight when you clearly don’t need oneAnd now that I mention that, where DID Mr. Light-Gun go after that first shot?. Then they take a potshot at someone in a dark room, on another floor, through a dirty window. Unless they’ve been following youIn which case setting up an ambush would have made more sense. they have no idea how many people are in your group or if you have any supplies worth dying for. A group of people this stupid should not have survived this long.

And that’s not even getting into the hilarity of guys running out in front of allies with guns so they can fight your flamethrower with their axe. Dumb stuff like this really sticks out when the rest of the world is so smart and grounded.

Just once I’d like to see these guys act like human beings. Maybe they shout at you to drop your food and bullets and they promise to let you go. (“Like hell,” Joel mumbles under his breath.) Maybe they shout some stuff to each other to make it sound like they have a plan or goal. (“How many are there?” says one. “Looks like just two,” says another.) Just… something. These guys aren’t any better than the idiotic raiders of Fallout 3: Mindless murderbots who only exist for the sake of having some man-shoots.

I think it would actually make more sense logically and thematically to replace these raiders with zombies. They already have an in-world excuse for why there would be zombies hereBecause the fireflies are stupid and dumb..

But still, this game is quite an achievement. The story is solid. The gameplay is solidOr so people keep telling me.. The only problem is the ugly patchwork seam between the two.

 


 

Experienced Points: Dragon Age: Impositions

By Shamus Posted Tuesday Nov 25, 2014

Filed under: Column 212 comments

My column this week is about the multiplayer aspect of Dragon Age: Inquisition. Also, allow me to head off some nitpicking and address something that didn’t fit into this column. (The satirical “Advice of Screwtape” style kind of boxes you in sometimes.)

In the column I claimed that people weren’t asking for multiplayer in Dragon Age. I’m sure that in reality there are lots of people who found themselves thinking, “Man, I wish I could play this with my friends.” However, this is nothing like what we were given. What you probably want is an intimate and mechanically interesting experience with one or two friends. What you get is a shitty grindfest with rando internet strangers. (Unless you and three friends available at the same time on the same platform.) To be fair, some people really do like that. But that’s not what people had in mind when they dreamed of playing Dragon Age co-op.

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Experienced Points: Dragon Age: Impositions”

 


 

Diecast #82: Dragon Age: Inquisition, Far Cry 4

By Shamus Posted Monday Nov 24, 2014

Filed under: Diecast 200 comments

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Hosts: Rutskarn, Josh, Shamus, Chris and Mumbles.

Show notes:

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Diecast #82: Dragon Age: Inquisition, Far Cry 4”

 


 

Another Part of the World…

By Shamus Posted Sunday Nov 23, 2014

Filed under: Random 173 comments

In the Unrest postmortem, someone kicked off a discussion about cost-of-living and the advantages of living outside of the USA. As someone who has worked from home for most of his professional life, this is something I’ve thought about a great deal.

Back in the dot-com days – before the bubble burst – the entire idea of Silicon Valley drove me crazy. Great, tech jobs are plentiful and pay is astronomical, but the cost of living is equally astronomical, everything is crowded, and your commute is likely going to be murder. I can understand why a person might dare to live there, but I could never fathom why a company would choose to live there. The cost of doing business is sky-high, real estate is high, labor costs are SUPER high, and California is notoriously difficult and expensive with regards to regulations and taxesThe linked site is the first search result. I’m not endorsing it politically. Even if you think California “isn’t that bad”, the people who usually run companies DO think it’s bad.. Why not locate somewhere nice but cheap, and simply pay relocation costs? Assuming you’re a small company (say, a dozen employees) you could easily move to some nice but affordable little suburb and make back those relocation costs with lower overall costs of doing business. (Or, you know, start a new company in one of those places.)

Continue reading ⟩⟩ “Another Part of the World…”

 


 
From The Archives:

Silent Hill 2 Plot Analysis

A long-form analysis on one of the greatest horror games ever made.

 

MMO Population Problems

Computers keep getting more powerful. So why do the population caps for massively multiplayer games stay about the same?

 

Object-Oriented Debate

There are two major schools of thought about how you should write software. Here's what they are and why people argue about it.

 

Bad and Wrong Music Lessons

A music lesson for people who know nothing about music, from someone who barely knows anything about music.

 

Grand Theft Auto Retrospective

This series began as a cheap little 2D overhead game and grew into the most profitable entertainment product ever made. I have a love / hate relationship with the series.

 

Who Broke the In-Game Economy?

Why are RPG economies so bad? Why are shopkeepers so mercenary, why are the prices so crazy, and why do you always end up a gazillionaire by the end of the game? Can't we just have a sensible balanced economy?

 

Diablo III Retrospective

We were so upset by the server problems and real money auction that we overlooked just how terrible everything else is.

 

Fable II

The plot of this game isn't just dumb, it's actively hostile to the player. This game hates you and thinks you are stupid.

 

Overthinking Zombies

Let's ruin everyone's fun by listing all the ways in which zombies can't work, couldn't happen, and don't make sense.

 

Shamus Plays LOTRO

As someone who loves Tolkein lore and despises silly MMO quests, this game left me deeply conflicted.