DM of the Rings XL:
What Dreams May Come

By Shamus Posted Monday Dec 11, 2006

Filed under: DM of the Rings 47 comments

Boromir dead. Live free or die.

Live free or die, man. Live free or die.


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47 thoughts on “DM of the Rings XL:
What Dreams May Come

  1. Carl the Bold says:

    Woo-Hoo! DM of the Rings Extra-Large!!!

    “Decomposing of my own free will.” I’ll be giggling (in a manly way) abou that all day.

  2. ChristianTheDane says:

    “Of my own free will…” Classic :)

  3. AlbinoDrow says:

    That is awesome! I hate it when DMs use their god-like powers to force my character in one direction. Of course, the DMs don’t seem to like my tangents^_-

  4. Tirgaya says:

    Carl, if I may be so bold… I don’t think there is any way in which one may giggle in a manly way.

    In fact I do believe that Man Law proscribes it.

    1. WJS says:

      You can make do with a chuckle…

  5. Carl the Bold says:

    Yes, you may be so bold, but you’ve never heard me giggle, so don’t be so sure.

    I just had a vision of Frank coming to meet with everyone and watch the rest of them play each week, keeping his mouth shut and decomposing of his own free will. Then, he tries to put in his two-cents worth on something (anything, really) and is told by the DM, “Boromir is dead. He can’t talk.”

    Suddenly, I heard Billy Crystal in the Princess Bride saying, “Hoo-hoo. Look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only *mostly* dead.”

    Now I have two reasons to giggle in a manly way. I might even guffaw or chuckle.

  6. Narmoth says:

    Live free or die, man. Die free or live.

  7. David V.S. says:

    Doesn’t giggling in a manly way sound somewhat like “mwu-ha-ha-ha-ha”? Or is that a chuckle?

    In any case, good guys can do that just as well as evil maniacs. I think. Unless I’m actually the latter.

  8. Crusader Corim says:

    Definitely a chuckle, or even a cackle. I think giggling is definitely on the “out” list for guys.

    I’m not sure, but I think he’s made the right decision here.

  9. Gropos says:

    LOL, the difference between this campaign and my home campaigns is that when I kill a player they tell me that, “Ugh, if you kill me it’s your fault. I’ll just play this character and change the name.” They also threaten me that their characters have an absurd number of siblings and that they all share the same skill set.

    Grats to Boromir though. He’s broken free of his DM’s Deus Ex Machina. ;)

  10. WolfSamurai says:

    Anybody else unable to see the comic? All I see is an image that says “”

  11. Dakiwiboid says:

    Hey, WolfSamurai, I suspect I know what your problem is! If you’re using Adblock, you need to click on it and whitelist this page, then hit refresh. Unfortunately, you’ll need to do it for every comic. Adblock always blocks the graphics on this page.

  12. -Chipper says:

    Frank, buddy, yer my hero! *sniff*

    I CAN, as a guy, shed a manly tear at Frank’s noble death without a problem, right?

  13. LafinJack says:

    I expected an XL comic since this is comic XL. I am so disappointed.

  14. Evil Otto says:

    If Frank changes his mind, maybe the DM can give him another character later.

    Like Haldir.

    At the Battle of Helm’s Deep.

  15. Karaden says:

    Hehe, got to love the efforts that DMs go through to railroad players, and the efforts the players go through to derail the train. Thats why when I DM I basicly start the characters out in the middle of a city and say, “What are you guys going to do?” (Usualy having them join forces as part of their character creation so I don’t have to try and force them together with some epic ring based quest). Usualy turns out to be a blast as I keep a bunch of different quests tucked away and they can run around doing what they want at their own speed (I even set up other groups that will be working on raiding dungeons and trying to stop the bad guys, great look on my groups face the first time they get to a dungon, slowly crawl through it to find nothing, then spend hours searching for secret doors because another group has already cleared the place.) Anyway, I was makeing some kind of point or something I think… oh ya, shame you have to go to such lengths for the railroad. Speaking of which I wonder whats going to happen with golem… zombie anyone?

  16. Marmot says:

    Again your top it off with an awesome deal! Rawr! That was plain brilliant; keep up the good work!!!

  17. Dave says:

    “If Frank changes his mind, maybe the DM can give him another character later.

    Like Haldir.

    At the Battle of Helm's Deep. ”

    I can see it now: “Screw this Hobbits and Humans stuff — I wanna play an ELF!”

  18. Antiquated Tory says:

    I have in fact been in games where a player has said ‘nope, nope, that’s what my character would do, and if he dies so be it’ largely out of spite with the DM.

  19. Nik says:

    Been following this comic for about a week now. Always makes me laugh. Better than doing any work. Thanks for making me laugh.

  20. intteresting point raised upthread. Is the campaign going to follow the book continuity or the movies? Will there be elves at Helm’s Deep?

  21. Dr-Online says:

    Frank: You mean I get to play an Uruk-Hai? Hellz yeah!

    *Cue battle of Helms Deep and Gandalf’s ride*

    Frank: Sonuvab*Arrow*

  22. Mom says:

    ..And as Frank continues to attend sessions and “decompose of his own free will”, he can smell as bad as he wants and maintain he is just staying in character.

  23. nigel says:

    Frank is stupid

  24. Doug says:

    Just a note to tell you that your comic made me literally laugh aloud today, as opposed to “LOL” which is usually a person smiling as they type.

    I mean making “haha” sounds and spitting my coffee.

    This comic is like treasure! Now stop reading your comments and make more of them!


  25. sarge says:

    ok so after I regained consciousness due to a lack of oxygen from laughing so hard, I proceeded to clean up the drool from being out cold for 5 minutes, and then I had to look away to prevent a relapse.

    Thank you, thank you, thank you… This is some of the funniest material I have read in a while, from the brilliant adaptation of one of literature's great works to what a group of guys can do create a train wreck of an adventure. Some of this stuff really hits home and having been on both sides of the DM screen.

  26. Andy says:

    Anyone ever tried playing the Dragonlance series? That was a continuous player railroading session. Needless to say the supposed lead hero (can’t recall his name) stepped out in front of a dragon very early in the game.
    DM: “But it’s a dragon?”
    Hero: “Yeh, and?”
    (Other PCs already having run for cover): “Run, for ????’s sake run!”
    DM: “Ok, so it opens up with its breath weapon.”
    Hero: “Ooh. That’s a lot of dice.”
    DM: “You’re dead.”
    Hero: “Oh.”
    Other players: “But. Er, isn’t he supposed to be the hero who saves everyone at the end, or something? We’ve read the books, you know…”
    DM: “Er, yer, well, I’m sure one of you will step up to take the lead…”

    (Needless to say, we started deliberately waylaying the story line after that, just to see how much the DM could take. Strangely we never finished the adventures… and for reference, the Hero player was also known as “Flat” Ang(us) after one of his earlier characters suffered a dramatic misfortune, so the dragon incident didn’t overly surprise us…)

  27. Dezmo says:

    “i’m not playing as a zombie!! ..” lol love it

  28. Vegedus says:

    Heh, reminds me of Naruto. That guy from the Hyuga branch-family, who was also a twin to the leader of the head family (urgh, complicated), who sacrficed himself, because it would be a free choice. Guess that guy is doing the same.

  29. Destroy Gundam says:

    If this guy wasn’t decomposing of his own free will, then it’s not the same.

  30. warren says:

    Loot Boromir!

  31. Sewicked says:

    You wanna talk about railroading? Try playing a ‘historical’ game. By that, I mean your characters have gone back in time. You need to get X done but you can’t change the future.

    Our Forgotten Realms GM got a whole load of 2nd Ed. D&D adventures & she’s converting them to 3.5 (which really impresses me). Due to the order in which she got them, our PCs have gone back to the Time of Troubles (We hates wild magic, we hates it) and she’s been trying realllllly hard not to railroad us. That has led to us being on the same page of the adventure for 8 game sessions, and jumping 8 pages in one. It has been a blast though.

  32. TheDeepDark says:

    I just gotta throw this in here. In a star wars campaign, I was playing this bounty hunter who got into a situation where the only thing he would logically do, is what he did. I pulled the trigger on my still belted grenade launcher, firing it at my feet.

    And the dice *totally* rolled in my favor, my armor absorbing the damage completely while my oponent was thrown near-dead across the room. Rock on.

  33. grassBlade says:

    October 17th, 2007 at 8:25 pm

    Loot Boromir!

    Agreed! Screw sending his stuff down the waterfall with his decomposing body. :)

  34. Kimera says:

    I can giggle like a fool… benefit of having XX chromosomes. ^_^

    My poor fiancee, as I read this I can hear our gaming group doing just this sort of thing, and worse. As much as I am laughing I do feel badly for him (sometimes).

  35. JD says:

    We kicked a guy out once when he got emotional over his ranger dying. That was a very odd low point for any session we’ve had, even worse than knowing we’d have to push aside the entire game for other things.

    Afterwards he went off to drown himself in EverQuest while we continued to play, die, and play some more. Oddly enough, my favorite part of the game is really the character creation. I think that’s why dying isn’t all that terrible to me.


    I love this site it just keeps getting better as I go.

    keep up the good work

  37. TheGeekLord says:

    Wow his DM let him play another character. When my character died I sat and watched everyone else have fun every wednsday afternoon for a year until they could get me rezzed.

  38. cheesebunny says:

    decomposing of my own free will is now going to go on my tee-shirt

    1. johanna says:

      I am ordering this right now!!!

  39. Trae says:

    JD: Actually I kind of like creating character sheets myself. Especially when trying to invent something totally original, compared to my previous characters anyway. It can be a little frustrating trying to work out all the proper numbers, but I call it a challenge and feel good when it’s done.

  40. Rose says:

    Bye Frank. We’ll miss you.
    I swear, I’m going to find an appropriate moment to say “I’m decomposing of my own free will” and enjoy all the weird looks I’ll get.

  41. Spike says:

    “But your DEAD!”
    “and you can’t force me to do anything!”
    “and decomposing!”
    “Of my own free will!”

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! These are SO fricken good! thanks a lot

  42. But in this case, wouldn’t it be “Live or die free”?

  43. 4ier says:

    There are a couple of messed up character encodings in the comments.
    Helm's Deep should be Helm’s Deep

    thank you… should be thank you…
    literature's should be literature’s

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