Seven minutes. It takes nearly seven minutes of unbroken dialog to resolve the end of this promised land quest, which is an optional quest with no connection to the main plot and which is rendered entirely moot shortly thereafter. For contrast, Shepard is only dead for three and a half minutes of screen time in the opening of Mass Effect 2.
And now, a collection of Star Wars quotes that people never realized are actually about our character’s ass:
“That’s no moon…”
“And I thought it smelled bad on the OUTSIDE.”
“Look at the size of that thing!”
“I should have recognized your stench when I was brought on board.”
“What an incredible smell you’ve discovered! “
“Only now. At the end, do you see.”
“You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.”
“Get in there, you big furry oaf! I don’t care what you smell!”
“You are required to maneuver straight down this trench and skim the surface to this point. The target area is only two meters wide.”
“They came from… behind!”
“Put that thing away, you’re gonna get us all killed!”
Looking back, I have to say Star Wars has an awful lot of dialog about smells.
WAY back in 2005, I wrote about a D&D campaign I was running. The campaign is still there, in the bottom-most strata of the archives.
Good to be the King?
Which would you rather be: A king in the middle ages, or a lower-income laborer in the 21st century?
A stream-of-gameplay review of Dead Island. This game is a cavalcade of bugs and bad design choices.
Overused Words in Game Titles
I scoured the Steam database to figure out what words were the most commonly used in game titles.
Silent Hill Turbo HD II
I was trying to make fun of how Silent Hill had lost its way but I ended up making fun of fighting games. Whatever.