CAUTION: This episode is basically 20 minutes of low-FOV camera-spinning.
In the debate of “did the developers realize what they were doing?” I think I’ve come down on the side of believing that they are over-enthusiastic, wide-eyed, naive, and completely lacking in self-awareness. Because if somebody did this on purpose I owe them a spin-kick to to side of the head. Actually no. Just a regular kick. I’ve had enough spinning.
I’d also like to point out that the vehicle we see at the start of the episode isn’t as preposterous as it might seem. It’s based on a real machine, the Bagger 288, which is used to remove massive volumes of overburden (basically, useless dirt and rock sitting on top of the stuff you want) when strip-mining:
That one doesn’t really give a good sense of scale. Here’s another:
So it’s a real machine! Of course, it would completely defeat the purpose of the device to place it indoors. In a pool of lava. And surround it with a mine cart roller-coaster trackA ZERO FRICTION track that doesn’t slow the cart down no matter how many times it goes around the loop. Why is the track a loop again?. And guard it with helicopters. And an army of mooks.
And then we get to the ten-times-larger machine at the end of the episode and all bets are off. I’m pretty sure that thing is larger than an aircraft carrier. It’s basically a pair of mook convention centers stacked on top of each other. On wheels. On fire.
I may have to spin-kick the devs whether they meant to do this or not.
 A ZERO FRICTION track that doesn’t slow the cart down no matter how many times it goes around the loop. Why is the track a loop again?
Trusting the System
How do you know the rules of the game are what the game claims? More importantly, how do the DEVELOPERS know?
A Star is Born
Remember the superhero MMO from 2009? Neither does anyone else. It was dumb. So dumb I was compelled to write this.
The Best of 2016
My picks for what was important, awesome, or worth talking about in 2016.
Blistering Stupidity of Fallout 3
Yeah, this game is a classic. But the story is idiotic, incoherent, thematically confused, and patronizing.
Games and the Fear of Death
Why killing you might be the least scary thing a game can do.