|By Shamus||Apr 9, 2014||Spoiler Warning||93 comments|
“No, seriously guys. If I can’t make it, just do Spoiler Warning without me. We’ve got plenty of people. I don’t need to be in every single episode,” is clearly the most wrong thing I’ve ever said.
So enjoy this twenty-five minutes of listening to the lengthy exposition for a quest and then forgetting all about it, waiting for the arrival of an NPC who will never show up because they haven’t read the letter to begin the quest, going shopping and yet still not buying any health potions, stealing yet another horse despite how this has proven to be a pointless hassle in the past, dying in a pointless fight against random bandits that could have been avoided by simply staying on the horse instead of letting it wander off yet again, and finally bunny-hopping around the wilderness aimlessly murdering trash mobs with no clear goal in mind.
This is what I do on the show. I restrain this lawlessness and tomfoolery. I am the Nick Fury of this team. Except with no eyepatch. Or Trenchcoat. Or training. Or weapons. Or budget. And nobody listens to me.