Star Wars Dance Off

By Shamus
on Oct 25, 2008
Filed under:
Movies

Please view the following video, after which there will be a short questionnaire:

  1. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “severe” and 10 being “horrifying and permanent”, how badly did this video damage your childhood memories?
  2. Do you think the victory of the Dark Lord of the Sith was a fair win, or do you believe he used his evil powers to influence the vote?
  3. Do you believe that somewhere, behind the scenes, George Lucas had a hand in this?
  4. How much do you hate me for this one?

Thank you for your cooperation. Grief counselors are standing by.

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2020209Sixty-nine comments, dude! Excellent!

From the Archives:

1 2

  1. Aergoth says:

    1. -5
    2.The armed stormtroopers might have helped. Even if they didn’t aim at you. And… it’s thriller.
    3. Quite probably.
    4. Quite a bit.

  2. Yamael says:

    1. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “severe” and 10 being “horrifying and permanent”, how badly did this video damage your childhood memories?

    Let’s leave it at 7.

    2. Do you think the victory of the Dark Lord of the Sith was a fair win, or do you believe he used his evil powers to influence the vote?

    It was the Emperor!

    3. Do you believe that somewhere, behind the scenes, George Lucas had a hand in this?

    How could he not?

    4. How much do you hate me for this one?

    All was fine until the gamorrean girl entered the scene… After that I’ll hate you forever.

  3. kamagurka says:

    This was horrifying and awesome at the same time. Horrisome! Or awerrifying!

    OK, now I’d really like to know where the hell that gravatar comes from. I didn’t set it, but it’s scarily apt…

  4. Robert Hayes says:

    1. Can’t answer. All ability to handle ordinal ranking has been destroyed by my brain’s desperate attempt to save itself by burning out the cells responsible for processing these images and sounds.

    2. Evil powers.

    3. Well, it was evil but looked really good, so I’d say George did the whole thing himself.

    4. Hate leads to suffering. I don’t want to go down that road. (I’d have left my lightsaber behind when Yoda advised it, too.)

  5. Jim says:

    1. I’ve suddenly jumped ship and decided that Back to the Future was my favorite 80’s franchise.

    2. These are not the droids you are looking for.

    3. Behind the scenes? I figured he was the Gamorrean Guard (Pig Guard) in group 2.

    4. Hate’s a strong word. On an unrelated note I’m thinking of unplugging my router between Friday night at 10pm and Monday morning at 6am.

    (It was actually a bit of a head trip, but overall not too damaging.)

  6. Tango says:

    I saw this a few months ago and it made me laugh.

    Now if you really and truly want to suffer, I suggest watching this http://tinyurl.com/6mvpqg. Prior to watching, understand that it is heavily suggestive without showing a single thing. The suggestiveness is pure audio and you should probably adjust your volume or listening method as appropriate. I’d call it NSFW based on the audio alone, but they don’t really say anything bad either…

  7. tom says:

    1. 1, I didn’t watch too many of the Star Wars movies.

    2. Evil mind control powers.

    3. maybe

    4. Not really hate so much as mild annoyance.

  8. Jeeg says:

    1) 0, I’ve never gotten the huge appeal of Star Wars. In fact, I kind of enjoy seeing its legacy tarnished.

    2) I’d say it was fair. People love Thriller, just look at how much attention that Filipino prison version of Thriller got.

    3) If there was cash money involved for licensing, Lucas was definitely involved.

    4) Not at all.

  9. Mike says:

    1. 9 – The matching that horrible music to those characters hurt more than seeing them dance.

    2. Vader and the Stormtroopers won fairly, the troopers synchronization was up to clone standards.

    3. Of course. We can blame it all on George.

    4. I shall have to remember never to watch another video you present for viewing.

  10. Shamus says:

    Kidding aside, I am amazed at how well everyone danced in those bulky costumes. Most of them were probably working with very limited vision. Also, dancing in a Wookie costume would be profoundly hot and tiring.

    And as Mike pointed out, the trooper dancing was up to clone standards.

  11. Griffin says:

    Maybe it’s just because I haven’t had my coffee yet, but I thought the whole thing was fabulous, and Darth was definitely the rightful winner.

  12. LemmingLord says:

    Actually, I enjoyed this far more then the prequel trilogy.

  13. Mari says:

    Vader had to have cheated because nobody could have beat Chewie and a Jawa dancing to Footloose. And no, this didn’t damage my childhood memories nearly as much as the “Christmas in the Stars” Star Wars album.

  14. Emperor Luigi says:

    1. 7
    2. Possibly, but I actually kinda liked that one, so I would have voted for it anyway.
    3. Oh hell yes.
    4. I hate you thiiiiiiiiiis much. ^_^

  15. GeneralBob says:

    1. 7, I’ll never watch starwars the same again…
    2. It was fair
    3. How couldn’t he
    4. On 1-10? 11

    And why was Zam Wesell in there?

  16. UtopiaV1 says:

    1. At first I thought ‘Meh, only a 4, I always prefered Star Trek anyway…’, then the dancing gamorrean came on… *blegh*

    2. I don’t actually think that was lord vader, it was… A MAN IN A COSTUME!!! (the real vader is from the west country, england, speaks with a farmer’s accent etc.)

    3.Lucas is to busy sitting on his pile of money and selling out all his franchises to care if the fans of star wars have a dance-off.

    4. I refer you to answer 1… gamorrean’s are NOT sexy :P but hey, that was free “entertainment”, so whats to complain about?

  17. Ben says:

    #1) My childhood memories of Star Wars weren’t uniquely damaged in any way, due to the movie causing significant overall brain damage.

    #2) I didn’t get far enough to see anyone winning anything.

    #3) George Lucas had to be involved, and he ought to be ashamed of himself.

    #2) You’re so evil, Vader has nightmares of you.

  18. Loneduck3 says:

    1. The only thing that annoyed me was seeing Leia and Amidala dancing. It’s an anachronism! The whole spectacle was just silly.
    2. Darth Vader makes it cool by proxy, it’s thriller. The only way it could’ve been beaten would be if Jabba the Hutt busted some moves.
    3. George Lucas? If I recall my theme park lore, it’s at Disney World. So who know’s? On one hand, it could be some ambitious park employees; on the other, it could have the dark touch of George Lucas on it. It did have ewoks after all.
    4. Nah, you’re alright. If you aren’t equipped to handle dancing Star Wars characters, than you aren’t equipped to accept the irrationalities of the world.

  19. Fenix says:

    1: 10, starwars will never be the same, just like whenever I see Mr./Agent Smith/ Elrond I’m reminded of the movie Pricilla queen of the desert in which the same actor plays a drag queen.
    2: I would have voted Vader no matter what.
    3: Possibly.
    4: Shamus = Bad Bad Man! But I’m still gonna regularly visit your site.

  20. R4byde says:

    I’m still debating with myself about whether to watch it or not…PROCESSING…THOUGHT CYCLE COMPLETE!
    What the heck! Nothing can hurt Star Wars as bad as the prequel trilogy did.

  21. Matt` says:

    Am I the only one here who thought it wasn’t horrible and scarring but actually sort of awesome? :P

    (Awesome in a lame and stupid way, but still… kinda awesome)

  22. Kel'Thuzad says:

    1. 15
    2. He was framed!
    3. Yes
    4. You’re very funny. Not even this could make me hate you.

    EDIT: After a second time, ignore number 4. I must have been numbed the first time. I hate you.

  23. R4byde says:

    All I can say is, at least that gamorean acts better than, uh, what’s that guys name? The one who plays Vader in the new films?

  24. Rhykker says:

    Hah, I rather enjoyed this.

  25. acronix says:

    I´d give it a 1. After seeing the epic, exagerated and out of character Dart Vader´s “Noooo!” in Revenge of the Sith, nothing can hurt as much as that.

  26. Shehzad says:

    I actually saw this live at Star Wars Weekends 2008, and it’s a lot of fun in person.

    And yes, it was a fair win. Vader can do anything

  27. Cincinnatus says:

    My love for Star Wars died long ago, in the flames of the Trade Federation battleships that an annoying little kid destroyed through sheer incompetence and terrible acting. Thus, this gives me a sort of dark, evil pleasure to see the franchise reduced to this. Yesssss, Picard…our plan for the control of the science fiction universe is working!

  28. Sam says:

    1. 904/10. You’ve destroyed my entire childhood as we know it.

    2. Of course he used powers to win. Of course, he used his powers of AWESOME to win (his powers of AWESOME existing only in the original trilogy, thankyouverymuch).

    3. Lucas has a hand in everything Star Wars. It is impossible to escape the clutches of he who shall not be named again after that first time.

    4. I hate you with a fiery passion that consumes my soul.

    I’d like to add a fifth question to this: How badly has Greg Proops’ career failed that he’s reduced to hosting a Star Wars Dance-off? Jeez…that was all kinds of sad there.

    Oh, yeah, and now I’m gonna have Thriller stuck in my head for the rest of the day. Thanks again, Shamus! *shakes fist*

  29. Kameron says:

    1. -4. I would have rated it an 8 solely on the inclusion of the female ewok and gamorrean (I was hoping for Leia in the slave outfit ;) ), but Darth Vader redeemed the entire production.

    2. See #1

    3. I hold Lucas personally responsible for the inclusion of ewoks in anything Star Wars-related.

    4. No hate here.

  30. Flying Dutchman says:

    On the Jar-Jar Binks scale of utterly innecessary annoyance this rates between 7 (Revelation that R2 is played by a circus dwarf) and 8 (an Ewok-only movie). By very definition this rates 10 on your scale.

    The dark lord should not have won, he had the fire capacity to turn this travesty into a burning pile of corpses (uncle Owen!), not using this potential was a terrible mistake.

    And come to mention it, it might be one of Lucas’ demented productions, God knows he lost it when he went all Nickolodeon on our asses with his horrid productions by the end of the century.

    Luckily, my hate is bound by respect for your “quiver of tiny walking sticks”-joke, which brings me to tears still.

  31. Gregory Weir says:

    Pretty sure that’s not canon.

  32. Justin says:

    1. I was actually not that traumatized. Lucas himself has inflicted FAR worse on my beloved childhood, so its damage done, really.

    2. There is an expression I’ve heard that Vader would approve of. “Power not used is not power.” Of course he used his powers. It may have only been to puppet lifeless stormtroopers, or to let the crowd feel a black glove on the tracheae, but there is no way that the man whose first force-choke was on his WIFE would show restraint of power.

    3. George Lucas didn’t do this. If he did, it would have gone from themed dance-off to Audio-Visual abortion before the video finished buffering.

    4. No hate… That would be like hating a history teacher for educating me about the Watergate Scandal. The teacher didn’t make it happen.

    Unless I find out that you DID make this happen…

  33. Strangeite says:

    Isn’t this just the logical extension of where Star Wars has gone?

    I am taking the whole family to Disney in January, I will make sure to lodge your complaint with the Dark Lord.

  34. Rustybadger says:

    Irrelevant, since Han shot first. But now I need to find a picture of a unicorn to reset my twitching brain.

    Seriously though, they could have really gone places with the whole Girls Just Wanna Have Fun theme. I’m just sayin’…

  35. I rather enjoyed it. Nothing wrong with some Otaku-like people showing their appreciation for their favorite film series with an amusing dance off. I thought the female Ewok and Gamorrean were hilarious, especially in contrast to Leia and Amidala.

    Fair win, because Vader’s a malevolent posterior.

    I doubt George Lucas had a hand in this – it was too fun!

    I don’t hate you at all Shamus. Awww. Thanks for showing us this!

    Ben

  36. Maddy says:

    1. I agree with Justin; this did not harm my childhood memories of Star Wars nearly as much as George Lucas has already done on his own. His over-merchandising/over-marketing has transformed the great and awesome Star Wars into something as dull and common as a Chicken McNugget.

    2. Seemed like a fair win to me.

    3. He may have been involved financially (i.e. licensing). Creatively, however, Star Wars fans have been far more inventive than Lucas for quite a while.

    4. No, this wasn’t your fault, and someone else brought this to my attention a few weeks ago, so the hate has already faded.

  37. Vader had me at the first head nod. I mean really, once you see that, there’s no where else to go.

  38. Jansolo says:

    1.
    10 (Leia the worst)
    2.
    I think everybody was drunk, for sure.
    3.
    Well, after watching every film (the last cartoon too) I think George Lucas have never seen the movies (maybe while making)
    4.
    A lot (have you got any spoon in order to pull up my eyes to see something like that never more?)

  39. Sitte says:

    I thought hate led to suffering.

    You’ve just proven it’s the other way around.

  40. Zukhramm says:

    Chewbacca and the jawa are clearly the best dancers.

  41. rumleech says:

    I need a bath after that!

  42. Dev Null says:

    Just when you think you’ve got a handle on how much time and effort people will put into something inane but amusing, and then whack the embarrassing video up in public to prove it, the internet crushes your feeble coping mechanisms with something like that…

  43. mookers says:

    1. eleven.
    2. fair win.
    3. does it matter?
    4. eleven.

    I actually thought that was about forty-three shades of awesome. I love anything that pokes fun at Star Wars, even in an officially sanctioned manner.

    Shamus, I’ll only hate you if you stop posting stuff like this. :)

  44. Khorboth says:

    1. only a 1, and I can gain that back by sharing.
    2. clone standards FTW.
    3. I don’t pretend to understand the subtlety of Darth Plad.
    4. No hate. Only reposting. (or should it be Riposting?)

  45. John Lopez says:

    This impacted me not at all. I had the misfortune of seeing an earlier incarnation of this live when we took my son to Disney World.

    After that, I’m numb to all entertainment induced pain.

  46. Minion says:

    I rather enjoyed this. :)

    I think Vader won just because the princesses were not smart enough to dress in skimpier outfits. I have no doubt if Leia had been in her slave Leia costume she’d have brought home a win for her group!

    Other than characters from his movies I don’t see how Lucas could be involved. This was entertaining. ;) He stopped having a hand in entertainment YEARS ago.

  47. Ben says:

    Chewbacca was appalling, but Vader doing Thriller? C’mon, that’s great stuff.

    I don’t know why everyone (including people in these comments) bags on Revenge of the Sith so much. It’s my favourite Star Wars film. For real. I just found it so much more entertaining.

  48. Ravens_cry says:

    1> -5, I have no childhood memories connected to Star Wars, and I thought it was pretty good. Live Long and Prosper, Dude!
    2> Evil Powers? Chewbacca and the Jawa were much better, though Lord Vador comes 2nd in my books. Chewie should have used the Chewbacca Defense.
    3> Oh most certainly, Mr. Lucas has been seduced by the Dark Side of Profit,
    4> Hate you? No more then usual.

  49. Veylon says:

    1) -1. Parodies only make me like Star Wars more. For some reason, this dance-off feels more respectful to the Star Wars saga than anything in the prequels.
    2) Vader’s the winner hands-down. I love that head roll.
    3) Probably not. It was fun after all, with none of the painfully forced wittiness Star Wars seems packed with of late.
    4) Not after posting this.

  50. whitehelm says:

    So, how many of you went and watched the previous year’s?
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTA9oLekoUc

  51. Will says:

    1: 2. Vader dancing thriller turned out to be awesome in a… creepy way.
    2: No
    3: I think even Lucas died a little inside right there.
    4: I love you Shamus.

  52. Zaxares says:

    1. -10 actually. I thought this was pretty awesome. :D

    2. You do NOT argue with the Dark Lord of the Sith. No lack of faith here, Sir! Nosirree!

    3. I would have said “No”, originally, but after the birth of the abomination that is Jar-Jar Binks and his wretched Gungan race, anything’s possible.

    4. Not quite enough to warrant a Force Choke, sadly. Or even a Force Push.

  53. Salaryn says:

    1. Star Wars isn’t a childhood memory for me so no problems.

    2. Nobody else got a nice smoky entrance so yeah, Darth the cheater as always.

    3.George might have been in the Vader suit, very possible.

    4. No hate for this one :) I have to say, they should have let the Wookiee win.

  54. kmurphy says:

    I was amazed that Chewbacca could actually pull off the style of Footloose in a 7′ wookie costume. The Storm Troopers also did a credible job of zombie dancing.

    Viewing didn’t damage my Star Wars memories at all, but brought back fond memories of the MTV all-nighters watching for Thriller to come on! Thanks for the link.

  55. Patrick J McGraw says:

    As horrific as most of this was, Vader and the troopers dancing to “Thriller” was actually pretty awesome.

  56. Shadow2336 says:

    1. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “severe” and 10 being “horrifying and permanent”, how badly did this video damage your childhood memories?

    3… 4 ish

    2. Do you think the victory of the Dark Lord of the Sith was a fair win, or do you believe he used his evil powers to influence the vote?

    Obviously it was his superior dance moves granted to him by the dark side.

    3. Do you believe that somewhere, behind the scenes, George Lucas had a hand in this?

    If he didn’t, I’d have to go find the one responsible and hang him.

    4. How much do you hate me for this one?

    On a scale from 1 to 10?…

    22.

  57. Krellen says:

    1. 0. My childhood memories are fully intact. Also, this was awesome.
    2. It was completely fair. Only Imperial Stormtroopers are so precise.
    3. This was good, so clearly Lucas had nothing at all to do with it.
    4. I love you for sharing this, Shamus. Thanks!

  58. Ol'Timer says:

    1. I’ve been in the shower for the past 25 minutes and still don’t feel clean.

    2. if michael jackson had a cape, he’d still have a career.

    3. Zam Wesell is the best proof of Lucas’ invisible hand.

    4. I don’t shoot messengers.

  59. ehlijen says:

    1: Negative 10. It’s silly and fun, just like star wars. If you still like star wars despite the ewoks, than this is hardly a challenge to ignore.

    2: It’s was staged from the beginning. In all the dance of videos I’ve seen so far, the last act was always the winner.

    3: Given that he refuses to let anything star wars be published without his approval, how could he not?

    4: Why would I? It was funny.

  60. Derek K. says:

    That was absolutely sawesome.

    http://www.qwantz.com/archive/001242.html

    Sawesome.

  61. Kadea says:

    1. 3- there are worse things out there

    2. Nope..it was the head-nodding when the doors opened (it nearly caused a coffe spit-take on my end)

    3. it’s disney…they are crazy enough as is

    4. not as much as my co-workers and friends will when i pass this on…

  62. […] found this via Twenty Sided, which also asks: On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “severe” and 10 being “horrifying and […]

  63. Glavar says:

    I was able to watch about 10 seconds before my bowels reached up and strangled my brain.

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