on Aug 27, 2008
This image was gleefully swiped from Cake Wrecks – which is one of those sites that will steal a lunch hour from you if you give it half a chance.
A San Andreas cake. For a four year old boy. This is like one of those, “How many things wrong can you find in this picture”, except that this one is too easy. The answer is: Everything. This is an image of perfect wrongness, from the expertly reproduced likeness of Cesar Vialpando holding a gun, to the wads of play money jammed into the icing. This cake is the work of a very skilled madman.
…I mean, who would let their 4-year old play San Andreas without making sure they play GTA and Vice city first? How is the poor kid ever going to follow the intricate plot without exposure to the preceding contributions to the GTA mythos? Me? I’d start the kid out with the 2D original and let them work their way through the series, but then I’m one of those traditionalist parents.
(I don’t normally give a heads up to the clueless when I’m being sarcastic. I can’t imagine someone taking the above for seriously, but the cake itself suggests that such people do exist. In a brief flirtation with responsible posting (a temporary thing, I assure you) I want to make this clear: Under no circumstances should you let your 4 year old play this game, unless you want them to learn about hookers, drugs, murder, and the f-bomb at a very early age.)
Shamus Young is an old-school OpenGL programmer, author, and composer. He runs this site and if anything is broken you should probably blame him.