Sure, you can slam a flaming flying machine into the roof of the Temple of Plot Door after conspicuously flying over the Greater Italy Archer’s Convention being inexplicably held on the rooftops of Venice. But if ONE GUY spots you after that, it’s insta-fail. You can feel this game shifting (without a clutch) from one mechanic to the next. Okay, now you’re free running. Now do the flying machine. Now do a stealth section.
Didn’t we steal a bunch of uniforms two days ago? Wouldn’t it have been worth a shot to slip into one of those and try walking through the front door? Risky, sure, but compared to lighting a dozen fires and piloting a flying machine? Interesting that Ezio just happened to arrive at exactly the right moment. If he’d been thirty seconds sooner or later everything would have played out differently. How was Abe Lincoln going to explain the bloody corpse if Ezio hadn’t shown up to take the blame?
This was a classic case of Cascading Plot Failure for me. The above sequence wasn’t uniquely horrible, but as objectionable or questionable events unfold, I begin thinking about them more, trying to MAKE the game make sense. This causes additional scrutiny, which reveals more questions that would have otherwise gone unnoticed. Pretty soon everything that isn’t explained becomes a gaping plot hole, because I lose faith in the writers. This isn’t as bad as Fable 2 or Fallout 3, not by a long shot. But it was at this point in the game that I stopped caring. I didn’t think the writers were playing fair and it felt like they were just making this up at random.
Final Fantasy X
A game about the ghost of an underwater football player who travels through time to save the world from a tick that controls kaiju satan. Really.
A stream-of-gameplay review of Dead Island. This game is a cavalcade of bugs and bad design choices.
Top 64 Videogames
Lists of 'best games ever' are dumb and annoying. But like a self-loathing hipster I made one anyway.
So what happens when a SOFTWARE engineer tries to review hardware? This. This happens.
WAY back in 2005, I wrote about a D&D campaign I was running. The campaign is still there, in the bottom-most strata of the archives.